How Was This Good?
OK, Bulletproof was shit. 50 Cent is a shit rapper. Nobody really gives a shit about G-Unit. There, all of the reality is out of the way, because we're going to discuss the new 50 Cent game, one of the most absurd storylines attached to one of the most fun action games in a while.
You are, of course, 50 Cent and you completed a concert in a random Middle Eastern country and you were paid...with a crystal skull.
Yes, a crystal skull.
Well your skull quickly gets stolen and it's up to you and another G-Unit member go out in pursuit of the skull in question. And, lo and behold, Fiddy is apparently a borderline genius when it comes to firearms. He can utilize, at a near God-like level, just about any type of firearm on the planet. Pistols and RPG launchers he is equally comfortable with.
I will say that the game is stupid. Unbelievably stupid. But it is fun. It is really, really stupid, retarded, moronic fun. The game is quite impressive on a technical level. There is some definite draw in during the loading of levels (not to the level of Mass Effect, mind you), but everything runs smoothly. It looks extremely well and the lack of slowdown in the face of, in my opinion, impressive visuals is amazing to see. The game is pretty much a really quick-paced Gears of War. Cover is very important because you will be chewed up out in the open in just a few seconds.
If you can get by just how stupid this game seems to be, you will likely be exceptionally satisfied with it. It's good and dumb fun...and that is, sometimes, the only thing you really want.