There is nothing redeemable about this game.
Even among the worst video games imaginable, it is still possible to take away something positive from the experience. After all, not everything about a video game can be terrible, right? Alone in the Dark manages to break this storied tradition, as there is nothing redeemable to be found in this game. From concept to execution, absolutely nothing was done right.
This even extends to the core philosophies driving the game’s development. For whatever reason, Atari decided to craft this in the vein of an action blockbuster or high-budget television show. Sweeping camera movements and grand orchestral flourishes dictatorially announce how you should feel. The only soundtrack while driving is a “subtle” move score. Poorly designed set pieces litter the landscape. The game is even formatted into episodes, complete with a “previously on” recap at the start of each playthrough and credits at the end of each episode. (Although the recaps are helpful, this is ultimately strange, given the lack of a digital release at any point in the game’s history.) The problem with this (the one that the game never realizes) is that video games and movies are two very distinct entities. The reason jumping a large pit in a movie, for example, is exciting, is because the viewer’s actions have no influence over such an event. In a video game, however, a player’s actions have all the power, and repeated death (a guarantee in this schlock) will suck any sense of exhilaration out of the event completely. What was expected to be a tense action thriller/horror ended up being a frustrating mess with not a single modicum of action or horror or even respect for the person playing through it, given how often it demands that everything be done by the book.
Alone in the Dark does not have much to show for it, either, as the story being told is not even one worth telling. Over time, it somehow manages to employ every lazy, poorly written cliche that never had a right to exist in the first place. For instance, every female character in the game is a screeching harpy whose only purpose seems to be to nag the protagonist and fall into some type of danger. Yet despite this, the female lead eventually becomes Edward Carnby’s (the protagonist’s) love interest by virtue of simply occupying space next to him. This type of writing simply permeates Alone in the Dark’s story. The villains are apparently only in it for the evils (and they’re not very good at it); the writing is stilted and expository; and early on, Edward punches a mirror so it can look cool in the recaps instead of for any logical reason in the plot. Yet ignoring all this, the story is still incredibly poorly written. The hero achieves his goal by acting directly against it, the backstory is a magical mythological mess, and the plot in general is heavily based on luck and convenience rather than any type of credibility.
It is also worth mentioning that the aesthetic is total garbage, meaning nothing linked to the story has any value whatsoever. Forceful emotional cues aside, the only defining feature of the soundtrack seems to be moaning, wailing women. On a similar note, the defining feature of the visuals seems to be sweeping-yet-somehow-fixed camera angles. Predictably, this makes the game difficult to play; without any way to adjust the camera angle (when not fixed, it is still firmly locked to your back), figuring out how to maneuver Edward is a nightmare. However, it is perhaps for the best that the camera pulls away from this train wreck, given the low quality look the characters sport. They all look less like people and more like dirty action figures. Edward gets it the worst, given his Lego hair and status as the most-seen and most closely seen character in the game. In addition, very little of Alone in the Dark is actually very dark. Most of it is very well lit by abundant fires, making the title an irrelevant laughing stock.
There are only a few instances in which the darkness plays a key aspect in the actual game. From time to time, a hallway filled with deadly stuff (the game never specifies) presents itself to you. Touching it results in near-immediate death, and the only way to neutralize it is by pointing a flashlight at it. Unfortunately, this takes place entirely in first person, making it difficult to get your bearings yet surprisingly easy to die several times over.
This represents a significant problem with the game: it employs a plethora of ideas that are never once executed properly. For example, the game ends with an open world Central Park to explore, contrasting with the mostly linear experience preceding it. However, as there is nothing to do other than kill Satanic tentacles, the end feels like a waste of time instead of a meaningful addition to the game. Navigating with a car certainly doesn’t help, given the drifty controls, zombies who glue themselves to your roof from 30 yards away yet lack this strength when chasing you on foot, and invisible walls that can cause your car significant damage. (Strangely, the female lead serves a similar role to the invisible wall. She is utterly invincible, and ramming your car into her will result in your car breaking down into a smoking heap of junk, somehow.) At this point, the vehicles are only useful for filling out your inventory. Unfortunately, inventory management is also broken. You can combine items (though the game does not pause during this), but there is no point to it, since every combination seems to end with lighting something on fire.
In addition, navigating this inventory is an utter pain. The analog stick will send you flying from item to item, and there is no clear way to unequip an item outside the inventory screen. Granted, it is possible to do this, but the game never explicitly tells you how; you must either figure it out on your own or go through the hassle of going in and out of the menu each time you want to do it. The only exception is the fiddly flashlight, which seems to demand that you use the menu to turn it off. Any other method will simply place it on your shoulder and waste precious battery life. The controls elsewhere do not fare much better, as the various features each have their own control scheme you must remember, but never will.
Though even ignoring this, the controls can still be unintuitive, something the combat demonstrates perfectly. Shooting enemies works fine, and it is easy to adjust to throwing projectiles at them, but much of the combat in Alone in the Dark is melee-oriented. While the melee initially carries a satisfying visceral weight to it, a series of poor design choices eventually sucks whatever enjoyment or competence the system once displayed. Part of this is because of a strange swinging system that only operates on four axes and never feels right. Swinging generally feels clumsy, such as how a downward clubbing motion requires moving the right analog stick straight up. Combine this with enemies that only die after being lit on fire and limited ways to light them on fire (you will not always have the tools to light them on fire, necessitating that you awkwardly drag them into the flames yourself), and fights turn into chores to be dealt with begrudgingly. Stretch this over far too many encounters over the course of the game, and the combat eventually becomes dreaded for all the wrong reasons.
Perhaps the only compliment that can be paid to the game is limited to one section of the game. Shortly after barreling through a poorly designed driving sequence with absolutely no checkpoints, Edward must find his way through the wreckage of New York. This is the only portion of the game where the demon motif works to its favor. The wreckage somehow comes together really well as a twisted, unreal, hellish version of a familiar American city.
However, as was previously mentioned, this is only incredibly minor section of the game. Although somewhat early in the game, it is certainly not worth playing through the first two episodes to reach this moment, and neither is playing anything following it. What is left is a mess of a game that tries to do too many things and doesn’t do a single one of them right. The only running theme throughout Alone in the Dark seems to be its disdain for you, the player, given how forcefully it thrusts the story upon you at every given opportunity. Simply put, this game will not appeal to anybody. It does not even qualify as something to be enjoyed ironically; its