Last year, we all witnessed the first salvo in the process that makes game reviewers obsolete. Yes, I'm talking about Soulja Boy Tell 'Em's shockingly accurate review of the Xbox Live Arcade release, Braid. At the time, he said... well, I actually don't really remember what he said. I just remember that feeling of being shaken to my very core.
Well, the full-scale invasion of famous-type people reviewing video games is now in full-swing. The latest transgression comes courtesy of stand-up-comic-turned-actor Dane Cook, who recently took a little trip to Infinity Ward to check out this "Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2" game they're working on.
After the trip, he had this to say...
Infinity Ward - Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2: How good? Eating your fav ice cream while getting a bj in zero gravity ... is a close 2nd.
...oh, and he said it via Twitter. I suppose I should point that out so that the lack of specifics on the graphics, gameplay, number of levels, and "fun factor" makes a bit more sense. I like that he's ditched the whole "wait until the game is done" thing that the current crop of game reviewers seems so hung up on these days. Just get to the point already, right?
And, obviously, Cook comes with a pretty heavy pedigree. From another entry on the man's Twitter thing:
I'm a hardcore life gamer. ColecoVision was my meth growing up. Mr. Do!'s Castle was my turf. Looping was my bzitch. WarGames owned pwned.
LIFE GAMER, dude. Anyone that can casually name drop Looping is A-OK in my book. So that's why I'm packing up my stuff and turning my attention to more fruitful endeavors, such as my new business venture, jeffgerstmannshowsyouhowtorumba.com.
Well, regardless of my now-obsolete career, this all looks like sound purchasing advice to me. I mean, I like ice cream. And I like Call of Duty. And I like "ice cream," if you get what I'm saying. So clearly Modern Warfare 2 is going to be the greatest game of our generation. If you need me, I'll be packing up my things and crying.
[UPDATE]: As I was getting ready to fire Ryan and shut down the office, I showed him the text of Dane Cook's review and he immediately became infuriated. It seems that Ryan used this exact wording in his review of Raymen 2 for the N64, which was written back in 1999! Old habits die hard, eh Dane? Well I guess we ain't going nowhere and you can expect to hear from our legal team. Good day, sir.