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Maybe We Should Start Issuing More Press Releases

UK's Official Nintendo Magazine really wants you to read its next issue.

 Collect 'em all?
 Collect 'em all?
You know, this might only be funny to people who write about games for a living. Or maybe I'm just being a dick. I can't really tell anymore. Either way, Future issued a press release this morning to let us all know about the next issue of Official Nintendo Magazine. The UK book is running its Super Mario Galaxy 2 review in the next issue, and apparently someone's pretty stoked about that. Stoked enough to use "latest Miyamoto masterpiece gets six limited edition covers and massive ten-page review" as the sub-head.

Here's one bit that I found particularly hilarious.

Ahead of Super Mario Galaxy 2 hitting UK stores on Friday 11th June, from Wednesday 12th May Official Nintendo Magazine offers gamers six limited edition covers and a set of exclusive badges, as well as the only review that matters. With a spectacular ten-page review, Official Nintendo Magazine has the definitive verdict on the latest and greatest Mario game.

OK... you've already called it the "latest Miyamoto masterpiece" and you're devoting SIX covers to the game. Are you really going to sit there with a straight face and claim that your official review is "the only review that matters?" You've already tipped your hand! Why would anyone read one page of that review, let alone 10?

Hey guys, do you think Official Nintendo Magazine likes that Super Mario Galaxy 2 game? Call me crazy, but I bet it'll review pretty well.

Personally, I'd love to see them put together six separate covers, call it "Miyamoto's latest masterpiece," and then give it a 60 or something. Of course, that'd be unfair to the game, which appears to be at least somewhat awesome, but a guy can dream, right?

"Hooray, the latest Mario masterpiece is here, collect all six covers and read our 10-pager, and then at the end see that we've given it a 6/10 because it's somewhat middling! The only review that matters!"

I won't even get into how absurd the idea of devoting 10 pages to a review is. Of course, if I was running a magazine devoted to Nintendo's platforms, I'd probably do the same thing. Heck, for a release this monumental, they might as well just devote the entire book to it this month. And next month.

The release closes with a quote from the magazine's editor, Neil Long.

“Super Mario Galaxy 2 is a very special game and to celebrate that we’ve done something very special with this issue. The top notch packaging and different magazine covers reflect the breathtaking quality and diversity within Miyamoto’s latest masterpiece. Combined with several other new projects we’re working on at the moment, it’s an exciting time to be at Official Nintendo Magazine.”

I sympathize with Mr. Long here, as this whole press release seems like something an editorial staff would have nothing to do with. He probably just picked his head up off of his desk one morning to see some excitable marketing person standing there, ranting about multiple covers and getting quotes approved for a press release. Sensing a pounding hangover coming on, he probably said "sure, sure, whatever you need to write, go ahead" and went back to sitting in the darkness. At least, that's how it always happened to me. Next thing I knew, photos of me with soda logos where my eyes should be were circulating around the office as part of some crazy sales pitch, and I decided to start paying more attention in meetings.

OK, so, let's reflect on what we've learned about the next Mario game:

  • It's the "latest Miyamoto masterpiece."
  • It's big enough to warrant 10 pages of review coverage.
  • It's eventful enough to warrant six different covers, one of which is exclusive to subscribers.
  • It contains "breathtaking quality and diversity."
  • The Official Nintendo Magazine review is the "only review that matters."

Be sure to keep all that in mind when all of the other completely useless, unofficial, and non-exclusive reviews start hitting closer to the game's May 23 street date.
Jeff Gerstmann on Google+

348 Comments

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sp1der1976

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Edited By sp1der1976
@oldschool:
Wow. It seems to me you have a real dislike of Giant-Bomb, its staff and it's fans/users.  
 
Why are you even here?   As the Mighty Extreame one said, if you dont like what you see here, get the funk out.
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TwoOneFive

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Edited By TwoOneFive

i just want to see the photos of jeff with soda logos where his eyes should be. 

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Lethkhar

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Edited By Lethkhar

I really don't want to get involved in what looks to be a horribly petty flame war, but could someone please explain to me what's so bad about this article? Was Jeff dishonest or something? 
 
I mean, speaking of journalistic professionalism, how you guys react if Giantbomb ever called one of their reviews "the only review that matters"? It seems like a harmless goof to me, and Jeff was just sharing it with us. I really don't think Jeff's plotting to bring down Nintendo or something. But then, I also don't think that Barack Obama's a terrorist, so what do I know?

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Eggn0g

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Edited By Eggn0g

holy shit guys jeff wrote about something he thought was funny  and posted it on his own fucking website
 
obviously this makes him a bad journalist

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Willy105

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Edited By Willy105

Haters are going to hate, deal with it.
 
People need to stop thinking of this place as your usual gaming website. This place is all about fun, not about 'game journalism', which has lost any significance it had before.

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Meowayne

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Edited By Meowayne
@sp1der1976 said:
" @oldschool: Wow. It seems to me you have a real dislike of Giant-Bomb, its staff and it's fans/users.   Why are you even here?    "
giantbomb is the only decent videogaming board where system wars are avoided and people are generally (comparably) sensible. (Apart from the weird glorification of those four dudes and their annoying approach to gaming)
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fjor

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Edited By fjor

i am here for vinny :D

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sp1der1976

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Edited By sp1der1976
@Meowayne said:

(Apart from the weird glorification of those four dudes and their annoying approach to gaming)"


@Meowayne:       

I'd say glorification is a little extreme? Perhaps strong support would be a better use of phrase?

A lot of us here on GB have soft-spots for the editors and founders, partly because they are the most vocal/visible members of the community.  In addition, I'm sure we all know how Jeff came to found this site and this gives him a large level of support from us. Any of us who has been shat on from a great height by ‘the man’ can associate with him. Anyone who can go through that to create something as new and vibrant as this site gets my thumbs up, whoever they are.

Sure they can be Jerks, I think the guys would be the first to say that themselves but ultimately it's their passion, integrity and deep knowledge of video-games is what keeps this site as my home-page and the bombast on my subscribe list.  

If any of that changes I would be one of the 1 to question why I hang around here.

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sp1der1976

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Edited By sp1der1976

I would also like to point out that this sites coverage of all things Nintendo is extreamly lacking, however you can only supply what your audience seems to like the most. 
 

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Willy105

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Edited By Willy105
@sp1der1976 said:

" I would also like to point out that this sites coverage of all things Nintendo is extreamly lacking, however you can only supply what your audience seems to like the most.   "

If there were more people who owned Nintendo consoles, I am sure they would cover it more, but right now, there's no real reason for them to do it.
 
Especially with their question-ares they sent out, they got an accurate depiction of their userbase.
 
@Meowayne said:
" @sp1der1976 said:
" @oldschool: Wow. It seems to me you have a real dislike of Giant-Bomb, its staff and it's fans/users.   Why are you even here?    "
giantbomb is the only decent videogaming board where system wars are avoided and people are generally (comparably) sensible. (Apart from the weird glorification of those four dudes and their annoying approach to gaming) "

Ha! No. That depends entirely on who you are here.
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owl_of_minerva

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Edited By owl_of_minerva
@sp1der1976:  If people don't want to worship the staff, then that's their business. Any reasonable community can accept differences of opinion, and why is there a need to rally to their defense? I doubt any of them are going to be driven to tears by healthy criticism. Sure, they're cool guys, but they can be wrong sometimes. I think it's gone a bit too far when you an editor from another site has to comment on here trying to defend himself against wrongful accusations. Even if this was meant in jest, it erred badly, as not everyone is going to see it as a harmless joke.
Giant Bomb badly needs to get over the cult of personality and origins myth.
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Al3xand3r

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Edited By Al3xand3r
@Willy105 said:

If there were more people who owned Nintendo consoles, I am sure they would cover it more

Wouldn't they have to cover it more in order to attract those people? They started from a perceived zero after all, aside from groupies that moved from gs. They shaped their fanbase, not the other way around. And that's fine. They don't have to cover Nintendo. If they don't wanna grow further, or if they wanna grow via a particular audience, great, but then as they're so ignorant and out of the loop, they shouldn't comment on Nintendo at all, yet they generally do. Though that's a completely different issue than what's in this thread so I dunno why we're discussing it at all. As for your earlier haters gonna hate comment, yes, it very much applies, but in this case Jeff was the hater over a perceived issue with a magazine/game he has no experience with, implying this or that about their integrity or how free their staff are to express their opinion, without having worked there, without - apparently, like most people who rushed to say Nintendo pays ONM - knowing much about how magazines work, hell without even knowing much about its country of origin. I fail to see how people pointing that out are haters.

ONM is a separate entity to Nintendo, ONM's writers are doing everything they can to sell copies, but magazine copies, not game copies, as that's what their paycheck relies on, and a colleague who knows nothing about them trashing them via his work over PR is anything but professional, whether you think it's journalistic work or something just for fun, it's still his job, not a random blog he writes on the side. I really dunno why people keep bringing up Nintendo in here, this is about ONM and Jeff's uncalled for remarks that directly atacked an entity you could consider GB's indirect competitor in many ways (time spent reading UK mags is time not spent reading a website accessible from everywhere in the world, and vice versa) and in a period where print media struggle to keep being published. Not to mention that same company also runs various magazines, not all platform specific, as well as websites, with the staff often overlapping even, so he basically attacked all of them with this, as one branch of a tree is much the same as any other. That is at least immoral and unacceptable.
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HandsomeDead

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@oldschool said:
" @HandsomeDead said:
" @oldschool: When he first thing I see is you complaining that no one is defending Nintendo, I knew I was going to get some noble Nintendo white knight. Jeff wrote an article criticising something that should be critiqued and, sure, dickheads jumped on top of it but you are doing absolutely no better with your cry baby posting. If you weren't so willing to bend over for The Big N at every opportunity, you'd see that. "
I am just happy with you bending over in front of me thanks  :-)
 
Jeff was just being a complete dickhead with this and Nintendo is irrelevant.  If you bothered to read stuff here you would know that it has been stated it would be exactly the same moron article if it had have been any other magazine and any other game or game company.  You can't see the forest for the trees, sadly.  I have simply responded to the Jeff fondlers, especially those who responded to me.  Apparently that is how the internet works.  Anything marvellous insights you want to regale us with? "
So, you give me a summary, then me basing my response to the thread on that, I'm in the wrong? The thing that's funniest about all this is you're riled up about him being immature yet you're the one who's calling him a 'fucktard' and somehow got even worse from there. As usual, when you try to take the highground and put people in theie place, you come off so much worse.
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captainfish

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Edited By captainfish

A lot of you guys are kinda missing the point. He's not really bashing the review itself, although having 10 pages is a bit silly. It's the idea of putting out a press release that reveals a ton of bias in the product. It's fine that they discuss the 6 covers and badges, as those are magazine marketing points. Even saying that your review is the only that matters, is a valid marketing technique, albeit a bit brazen. However, the language that they use to refer to Galaxy 2 is very biased in it being a great game. Miyamoto's masterpiece, the latest and greatest mario game, this is the work of marketing people performing what is supposed to be editorial work. The more important thing to take away from this article is the lines between who is the editorial voice, the voice that reviews and discusses games, and who is the marketing voice, the voice that determines ad sales and marketing initiatives. In order for any magazine to really work, these voices have to be independent, that is, working completely separately and communicating to the public in that manner, or if they do work in tandem, the editorial voice has to throttle what the marketing people are allowed to do. This is a case of a marketing press release filled with editorial content, which is sleazy.

Edit: Chris, I can't really believe that you posted in here, but no one is really calling you out on whether or not you are a fair and balanced editor, reviewer, of if the same can be said for your publication. The real issue here is that the press release to promote your magazine ends up promoting SMG2 with an editorial voice. I think it's very possible to create a marketing focused press release about ONM's SMG2 coverage that has much less hyperbole and and focuses on the reasons why you should buy that magazine. "6 covers, badges, news on the upcoming Wii Mario galaxy game and an in-depth review."  That sounds a lot less biased than what was released.

Also I can't believe you guys took this discussion of how a magazine advertises it's content into a tirade against Official console magazines, nintendo, fanboys, reviews and whatever you wanted to see. Maybe Jeff shouldn't write articles like this anymore, because a lot of people take them to mean much more than they actually say.

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august

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Edited By august
@HandsomeDead said:
" @oldschool said:
" @HandsomeDead said:
" @oldschool: When he first thing I see is you complaining that no one is defending Nintendo, I knew I was going to get some noble Nintendo white knight. Jeff wrote an article criticising something that should be critiqued and, sure, dickheads jumped on top of it but you are doing absolutely no better with your cry baby posting. If you weren't so willing to bend over for The Big N at every opportunity, you'd see that. "
I am just happy with you bending over in front of me thanks  :-)
 
Jeff was just being a complete dickhead with this and Nintendo is irrelevant.  If you bothered to read stuff here you would know that it has been stated it would be exactly the same moron article if it had have been any other magazine and any other game or game company.  You can't see the forest for the trees, sadly.  I have simply responded to the Jeff fondlers, especially those who responded to me.  Apparently that is how the internet works.  Anything marvellous insights you want to regale us with? "
So, you give me a summary, then me basing my response to the thread on that, I'm in the wrong? The thing that's funniest about all this is you're riled up about him being immature yet you're the one who's calling him a 'fucktard' and somehow got even worse from there. As usual, when you try to take the highground and put people in theie place, you come off so much worse. "
He's just trying to raise the level of discourse. By referring to Jeff Gerstmann's ass and genitalia, over and over, in nearly every post he makes.
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FluxWaveZ

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Edited By FluxWaveZ
@CaptainFish said:
" A lot of you guys are kinda missing the point. He's not really bashing the review itself, although having 10 pages is a bit silly. It's the idea of putting out a press release that reveals a ton of bias in the product. It's fine that they discuss the 6 covers and badges, as those are magazine marketing points. However, the language that they use to refer to Galaxy 2 is very biased in it being a great game. Miyamoto's masterpiece, the latest and greatest mario game, this is the work of marketing people performing what is supposed to be editorial work. The more important thing to take away from this article is the lines between who is the editorial voice, the voice that reviews and discusses games, and who is the marketing voice, the voice that determines ad sales and marketing initiatives. In order for any magazine to really work, these voices have to be independent, that is, working completely separately and communicating to the public in that manner, or if they do work in tandem, the editorial voice has to throttle what the marketing people are allowed to do. This is a case of a marketing press release filled with editorial content, which is sleazy. "
Agreed.
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Milkman

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Edited By Milkman
@oldschool:  What the hell is wrong with you? Do you work at this magazine? Does your mother work for the magazine? What is it about this article that just set you off into this insane tirade of ridiculous insults? It seems that every post you make here (which is a whole fucking lot, by now) is just filled with "Jeff is worse than Hitler and is the worst journalist of all-time". Do you have some sort of personal grudge against Jeff? Like, I'm just baffled here. I really don't know what to say. Go back and read your posts and think for a second if you were MAYBE being a little insane. 
 
Also, the most hilarious part about all this is how with every post you feel the need to scream "THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NINTENDO, I SWEAR". So, I guess it's just some kind of crazy coincidence that all the people going on about how shitty this article apparently is all have red user names. But, no, it has nothing to do with Nintendo.
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Mourne

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Edited By Mourne

Those covers are shite.

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Sabata

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Edited By Sabata
@oldschool: Granted, the Jeff fanboys are pretty annoying/dumb, but you have yet to say why Jeff is such a "shit writer."  All you seem to be posting is along the lines of,  "Jeff wrote an article I thought was immature and that suddenly makes him complete shit forever!" Unless you can point out more instances other than this one where he was a "shit writer" I'm going to have to say your arguments are just as bad as the fanboys'.
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waxingapocalyptic

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Thanks to this article, I am now following Giant Bomb. 
 
Good on you, Jeff.

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ashriels

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Edited By ashriels

I bet as a journalist it must be pretty frustrating, but I'm sure from the perspective of the developers the review is more of a celebration of their hard work.  I wouldn't take it too personal, or try to dissect it too much.

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danimal_furry

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Edited By danimal_furry

Hahahaha! That was pretty funny. Probably the magazine would have been better off calling its "review" and "inside look" or a "preview".

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phaedrus27

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Edited By phaedrus27

Wait... is this a review of a preview of a review? At least they give the feeling that this is going to be a nice unbiased review, not like 10 pages of ass licking or anything.

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MagikGimp

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Edited By MagikGimp

This is common here (UK, collect all the covers) these days. I don't buy magazines any more but NOM used to be good back in the SNES, start of N64 era; some really good humerous writing and it was a fairly large good value mag too. Some people will buy all six in the hope that they will be collectors' items in the future but so many mags are produced now that no one will give a shit then. People have too much money and too little sense but hey, if it keeps them happy...

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Chrion

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Edited By Chrion

 In the world of game media, Jeff will always be my hero.

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Emeraldecho

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Edited By Emeraldecho

Yes Jeff we all know you would score this game somewhere in the 8 range as you did with Zelda and Metal Gear Solid. After rereading your MGS1 review it's sad to hear you still write about games for a living. For the love of god do something else, you've pissed and moaned about video games, and sucked Marcus Fenix cock enough. It was so refreshing when your face was removed from gamespot (which despite you leaving still sucks), but it would be ideal if you just dissapeared from the face of the internet. Anyone that talked down on MGS1 as much as you did deserves to flip burgers for a living. Casual gamer you are Jeff.    

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ahoodedfigure

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Edited By ahoodedfigure

I knew Nintendo Power was a shilling machine ever since issue one way back when, especially for in-house products.  
 
What bugs me is that many full coverage mags do similar shit.

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Matfei90

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Edited By Matfei90
@EthanielRain said:
" You are being a bit of a dick - AFAIK Nintendo Magazine is mostly aimed at little kids, and when I was little I couldn't get enough Mario - but in a funny and justified way :O) "
I severely doubt little kids would even want to read half of 10 pages, regardless of content.
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goodlucktj

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Edited By goodlucktj

let me get this straight: a magazine publisher issued a press release informing the internet (among others) that their magazine's review is the last word in the matter of 'super mario galaxy 2'.
 
is there anyone in the world who hasn't made up their mind about playing 'super mario galaxy 2'? what an unnecessary press release, they should've just sent out the mags.

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klinkcow

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Edited By klinkcow

thank you jeff, i agree wholeheartedly

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vaiz

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Edited By vaiz

Whatever, I thought Jeff's article was funny. Fuck you guys for taking shit so seriously.

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Hamst3r

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Edited By Hamst3r
@oldschool said:
"the Jeff Defence Squad "

Bomb Squad
Bomb Squad
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natetodamax

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Edited By natetodamax
@Hamst3r said:
" @oldschool said:
"the Jeff Defence Squad "

Bomb Squad
Bomb Squad
"
That is easily the best image I've ever seen on this site. Thanks for posting.
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nail1080

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Edited By nail1080

LOL SO GODWINDS topic disappears...

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Coombs

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Edited By Coombs
@nail1080 said:

" LOL SO GODWINDS topic disappears... "

 Moderation based on personal opinion and agendas rather than site rules.
Thanks for proving the point that was being made in the thread that you just deleted.
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nail1080

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Edited By nail1080
@Coombs said:
" @nail1080 said:

" LOL SO GODWINDS topic disappears... "

 Moderation based on personal opinion and agendas rather than site rules. Thanks for proving the point that was being made in the thread that you just deleted. "
You can't blame the mods though, they just want to keep the place running smoothly and the personal shit about the staff went way too far.
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Gabriel

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Edited By Gabriel
@nail1080 said:
" LOL SO GODWINDS topic disappears... "
?
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Rowr

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Edited By Rowr

Good riddance to bad rubbish. Keep up the good work Mods.

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jim_dandy

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Edited By jim_dandy

You are all bad people and you should feel bad. 
 
Except Rowr. 
 
HE'S THE WORST. D:

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Ace829

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Edited By Ace829

Is it possible to lock an article? If it is, can we please lock this? This topic has been beaten to death ten times over.

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Jayge_

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Edited By Jayge_

Nice to see the Nintendo Mafia getting whacked. Somebody send Old Tony a nice bottle of wine as a thank-you. 
 
This Jayge cameo brought to you by JaygeCorp, the Jayge for all of your Jayge needs. 

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Disgaeamad

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Edited By Disgaeamad

Oh shit, did someone say drama? Table flipping time!
 
 (ノ `Д´)ノ ~┻━┻

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Claude

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Edited By Claude
@Jayge said:
" Nice to see the Nintendo Mafia getting whacked. Somebody send Old Tony a nice bottle of wine as a thank-you.  This Jayge cameo brought to you by JaygeCorp, the Jayge for all of your Jayge needs.  "
I'm still here.
 

For the Wii or Death
For the Wii or Death
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Jayge_

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Edited By Jayge_
@Claude: You're only an NM member when you're drunk.
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Dr_Feelgood38

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Edited By Dr_Feelgood38
@Jayge said:
" @Claude: You're only an NM member when you're drunk. "
I thought he was in a constant state of intoxication.
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Claude

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Edited By Claude
@Jayge said:
" @Claude: You're only an NM member when you're drunk. "
@Dr_Feelgood38 said:
" @Jayge said:
" @Claude: You're only an NM member when you're drunk. "
I thought he was in a constant state of intoxication. "
I'll reply... probably not, when I'm sober. Long live the Wii and Motion Controls.
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Disgaeamad

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Edited By Disgaeamad
@Claude: But everyone loves you, Claude.
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Claude

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@Disgaeamad said:
" @Claude: But everyone loves you, Claude. "
You were dead and came back to life. Where do you stand... back from the grave? We live on a forum, you must have an opinion.
 
Look... I can write while drunk. Screw the bad drunk writers.