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91 Comments

The NXE Style Guide

Ryan lets something stupid about the NXE bother him, and then vents about it!

I've been playing with the NXE (I'm really upset about how quickly I slid into using that stupid acronym) for a couple of weeks now, and in general, I'm quite pleased with the changes that have been made. There are a few navigational kinks, such as the less-than-obvious importance of the new quick launch bar, that took some getting used to, but the menus are bigger and bolder, and generally laid out in a way that makes more sense for what the Xbox 360 is, rather than what it was.

Now I hate to nitpick (a shameless lie, I live to nitpick) but there's a tiny, thoroughly petty thing about the NXE that I've allowed to get under my skin. It's something that took me a while to notice, but there are actually quite a few promotional menu items scattered throughout. The mere presence of the mostly appropriate advertising isn't what gets to me. The thing is, all of these units feature some promotional headline and a short blurb. Not to brag about performing repetitive, often tedious tasks for rent, but I've written a fair amount of promotional copy in my day, and the writing in all of these is categorically terrible.

Gearses!
Gearses!
Check out Sgt. Fenix over here. The imagery is certainly effective, but “Highly Anticipated Sequel” and “Includes jaw-dropping visuals?” That's flat, empty nonsense! How about “Is a Game” and “Got pretty colors,” or just a bunch of gibberish? I don't know what it says about me as an anal-retentive word-nerd, but the use of “Includes” bothers me particularly.

Iron Mens!
Iron Mens!
Iron Man's also pretty awesome. “Legendary Super Hero” and “Industrialist fights evil” almost sound like descriptions of the movie that went through Babelfish and then back into English. I imagine those beat out “Flying Man Robot-Fighter” and “He is the diligent protector of children,” but just barely.

On a certain level, I empathize with whoever has the thankless job of trying to cram something that's both informational and evocative into two 30-character lines. I also realize that this is just about the most absurdly trivial thing to get invested in, but dammit, if you're going to cake your interface with promos, make 'em count! Hopefully they'll either find their pace before the November 19th launch, or I'll learn how to be less of a needlessly obsessive lunatic. For what it's worth, the former is significantly more likely.


91 Comments

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HTTenrai

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Edited By HTTenrai

"Awe-inspiring sites"? Sites?

*HEAD EXPLODES*

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addictedtopinescent

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Yeah pretty bad stuff, at least it doesn't bother much I guess.

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Keeng

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Edited By Keeng

I am completely on Ryan's side about this.

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kboy

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Edited By kboy

Sort of a minute complaint about it. I can sympathize, though. I'm more of a grammar Nazi than a word-nerd. Those descriptors do read pretty harsh.

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killdave

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Edited By killdave

Lol Ryan go play some computer games and chill :D

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PLWolf

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Edited By PLWolf

All the advertising dollars they have, I'm sure someone at Microsoft can come up with some better lines. Unless they're leaving this to the owners of the properties. If that's the case, they need to take over the duties and fast. lol

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skudfisher

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Edited By skudfisher

"Surmise the possibilities" is now officially my new life motto...

They're like really bad haiku's

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destruktive

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Edited By destruktive

That's just like all other types of ads though :) kinda used to it all ready

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darkjester74

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Edited By darkjester74

Now that I read them they do read suspiciously Engrish-like.  Hmmmm....

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piropeople13

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Edited By piropeople13

I am just pissed about the ads period.  Why do we pay for Xbox Live and then just get ads?

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YT

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Edited By YT

If this is the worst thing about NXE, we're doing good

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bekern

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Edited By bekern

LMAO some of those are hilarious. "Fugitives confront enemies" <- they couldn't they think of anything better???

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Landmine

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Edited By Landmine

Gears of War 2 "Above ground beefcakes shooting below ground beefcakes". Sounds kinda like they'd be selling you some hamburger meat. In-N-Out ftw!

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Psynapse

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Edited By Psynapse

Hahaha you crack me up Ryan, but i see where you are coming from :D

I just wouldn't bother reading them anyway... I come to my GB (<3) for all of my gaming news/reviews etc anyway ;)

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hatking

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Edited By hatking

I know what you mean abou the word "includes"...that bothered me too.

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Cheetoman

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Edited By Cheetoman

ooook?

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Johnny5

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Edited By Johnny5

“Legendary Super Hero” and “Industrialist fights evil”

FOR MOTHER RUSSIAA!!!!

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Jerr

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Edited By Jerr

Haha sounds like part of a haiku i wrote when i was 9

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Snail

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Edited By Snail

You'll have to learn to be a less of  learn how to be less of a needlessly obsessive lunatic. Sorry Ryan.

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AlucardaLaCarte

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Edited By AlucardaLaCarte

Tony Stark Throws Big American Party!!!

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jcd

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Edited By jcd

I'm sure it is just filler because the update has not even launched yet.

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StarwindX9

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Edited By StarwindX9

The whole NXE looks like a series of ads with a user interface buried under it. I understand the easy profit Microsoft would see by selling this effective ad space but honestly... I am already paying 15 dollars a month for something Sony offers for free. I don't want to see a bunch of ads outside of the marketplace. The blades worked... the NXE seems like yet another annoyance I can chalk up to playing a 360.

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superezekiel

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Edited By superezekiel

I thought I'd come in here loling at a stupid, tiny complaint.

But being a word-nerd myself, it's like they have no sense of eloquence in the slightest.
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Dryker

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Edited By Dryker

This is something new? Depending on what level of compositional artistry you happen to find yourself on, everything of a lower standard will seem amateur and even outright obnoxious. Try living in my head Ryan. The outrage never stops.

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Kyle

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Edited By Kyle

GEARS 2: NOW WITH JAW-DROPPING VISUALS!!!

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Kyle

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Edited By Kyle

I think the Journey to the Center of the Earth card takes the cake. The top line is like the movie's title rephrased and then "awe-inspiring sites, grave danger" below it. Just brilliant. Thanks, Mr. Marketting Guy! I'll be sure to check that one out.

The sad part is that most of these don't even need text. Especially Gears 2 and Iron Man. Like . . . yeah, we know. But of course Microsoft would never let any less then 100% of their cards have two full lines of description. WE NEED TO HAVE A UNIFIED FRONT, PEOPLE!!! SHOW NO CRACKS!!

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SleepyDoughnut

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Edited By SleepyDoughnut

Surmise the possibilities!

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taco484

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Edited By taco484

"fugitives confront enemies"

is it just me, or could that be a tagline of at least 25-50% of games?
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borgmaster

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Edited By borgmaster

damn, now this is gonna bother me, thanks a lot. you alos did the same thing with guitar hero by the way, and I would've liked that game too...

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soul101

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Edited By soul101

Personally I don't mind the ads, as long as they keep them out of my owned content and restrict them to the "Spotlight Blade".  I did find it funny you where talking about the Gears ad on the Dash, and I though you where talking about the Gears ad on your site..... that sounded like a slight against you but it was more of an observation (I want you guys to make all the money in the world and keep the site rolling) keep up the nitpicking I like doing it too.

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tmontana1004

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Edited By tmontana1004

Wow Ryan lol just wow.

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Will

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Edited By Will

Im just glad its fast and finally has the XBL party thing. Dont really give a crap about games to the HD.

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Wright

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Edited By Wright

I want games without shackles! TELL ME MORE!

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Edited By vigorousjammer

Damn, ya know, I never realized it till now... but all of the taglines so far on xbox live primetime are pretty poor... and thse are even worse...

I just think because it's pre-release, they aren't trying too hard... but once the actual update rolls around, they might get better...

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n00bosaurusRex

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Edited By n00bosaurusRex

Hah!  You can tell the ad writing dude didn't play portal.  "Break the Laws of physics"? Really?

GLaDOS: "Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman's terms, 'Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out'. "

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Seanakin66

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Edited By Seanakin66

I guess I can't blame you, but all things considered, this ranks most closely to the annoyance that follows the time when someone first points out the right-pointing arrow in the FedEx logo, and henceforth it becomes the ONLY thing you see.

Also, perhaps Jeff "Robocop: A Documentary About Robotic Policemen" Gerstmann could subcontract his copywriting services?

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Jayzilla

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Edited By Jayzilla

ryan you obviously didn't get your nappy in that day. the nappy is your friend. embrace the nappy.

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Warihay

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Edited By Warihay

I got the NXE too. I think you are getting worked up over nothing Ryan. Those ads really have not bothered me so far.

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lamegame621

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Edited By lamegame621

haha...those are terrible. I think It's actually pretty funny in a tongue in cheek way.

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Player1

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Edited By Player1

Yeah, now it will annoy me. Thank you Ryan Davis :P 

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Xander51

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Edited By Xander51

Well great.

Now I have to read all of them.

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Cubical

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Edited By Cubical

I have been using the NXE for a while and I hate just about everything on the nxe, the new interface looks horrible bland.

So EVen if you use themes it makes them look ugly with large dead empty space the 3d icon float in.   The only thing I do like about it is 100% the programming job that makes it run faster and has new hardware features that is it.

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High

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Edited By High

If it's so poorly written let's hear some new ideas for the two line 30-character promos.

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BiggerBomb

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Edited By BiggerBomb

Bwahahaha

"Fugitives confront enemies"
"Surmise the possiblities"
"Awe-inspiring sites, grave danger"

In Soviet Russia, video game play you! These sound like an Eastern European tried to directly translate a sentence without knowing that half the meaning would be lost in translation. I actually lol'd at a few of these. I don't think I'll be as pissed as Ryan, if anything I'll be mildly amused, but this is a stark contrast with the industrial and polished look the NXE is going for.

Thanks, Ryan! Great read.

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dsplayer1010

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Edited By dsplayer1010

Ads never really bothered me before, but there seems to be a lot in the NXE.

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seram

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Edited By seram

Haha well I guess the promos can provide some quick laughs when you need some.

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Charleslegrand

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Edited By Charleslegrand

Well, on the bright side, if that's the only thing getting under your skin, Microsoft did a great job overall ^^

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jimbo_n

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Edited By jimbo_n

I dont think I will ever care to be bothered by that =)

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dtran1212

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Edited By dtran1212

they my as well just slap the words "BUY ME! BUY ME! BUY ME! on there instead of putting up these cheesy descriptions

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RHCPfan24

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Edited By RHCPfan24

"Fugitives confront enemies" - Terminator Sarah Chronicles

So I am guessing that any mention of a robot in the show is out of consideration?