How is it that there hasn't been an Expendables video game yet? I mean, I know the first movie came out just a couple of years ago, but considering that movie was pretty much a two-hour video game--complete with multiple boss fights, an inconceivable body count, and at least one turret sequence--it's sort of surprising that it took until two months before the sequel comes out for someone to get on this.
At least someone finally did. That someone, by the way, is Ubisoft, who today announced that The Expendables 2, a game based on the adventures of Barney Ross, Yin Yang, and Hale Caesar, would be coming to Xbox Live Arcade, PlayStation Network, and PC this summer.
For those unaware, those characters are played by Sylvester Stallone, Jet Li, and Terry Crews respectively. And they will of course be joined in the film by basically every action movie hero from the 1980s, 1990s, and portions of the 2000s, including Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Chuck Norris, and Randy Couture. Presumably Steven Seagal was too busy being a Louisiana deputy police officer, or murdering puppies (allegedly).
Now, you may have some trepidation regarding this game. After all, it's a movie-licensed action game, and it's also a downloadable title. You'd be forgiven for having flashbacks to that godawful G.I. Joe game from a few years back. However, based on the screenshots sent over, this looks a little bit more like four-player Contra, except with dudes in their 40s, 50s, and 60s holding the guns. And you know what? That almost sounds like kind of a great idea. I have no idea if this will be good, but inexplicably, I'm now interested in this.
You can feel free to point back to this story and laugh at me if/when it turns out to be horrible.