Me blissfully running around on the battlefield (3) as an engineer. My job is simple, repair shit and occationally shoot my bigass bazzoka at stuff. I can manage that, that requires enough cognitive ability for me to handle. But when my superiours flashes a shiny new MP5 and says "If you want this weapon you'll have to do some crazy shit! Like.. I dunno, shank a dude with your welder or something!", I start to doubt my superiours somewhat. Now I'm not one to turn down a challange, but it would seem highly ineffective choosing my welder over my high powered assault rifle. But I'm a good soldier, I want a promotion (and a new shiny MP5) and maybe a raise in my pay. So I begin my journey wanting to dish out some butt rape with my welder.
Well turns out, you shouldn't bring a welder to a gun-fight.. After my attempts to blind my enemies to death (and perhaps subdue them with eye cancer) I figured I'd sneak on some sniper instead. The welder was very good at making the snipers clothes burn, I figure I'd be nice to him and put out the flames with my knife (was not very effective mind you). Ended with him laying on the ground all dead, accident I promise! Unfortunately stabbing people in the throat with your knife isn't barbaric enough for my superious. They want me to kill people in the slowest most ineffective ways possible, which is kinda hard considering I haven't gotten any super ninja special forces training from my army (yes, talking about you recon!).
In conclusion, I hope Dice doesn't declare war against someone. Also that MP5 looks dope.