A drunklen rant

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Posted by MattyFTM (14433 posts) -

Heys duders.it's st patrocks day and ive had a lot of guinness. I think im at the stage where: 

  • I can talk and type legibly
  • I am tallkign bullshite
but if this is complete crap and is undreadable, then i am sorry.
 
Anyways, here are a few random thoughts that pop into the head of t adrunk person: 
  1. Why did i drink this much?
  2. hOW MUCH DID i DRINK? 
  3. hOW DID i ACCIDENTALLY PRESS TH ECAPS LOCK KEY?
  4. why, in a shoping senter with one automatic door and lots of manule doors does everione go in and out in the auotomatic foor and no one used any of the the manyual doors?
  5. what does the user name mracoon mean? is it mr racoon, m racoon or just one thing mracoon?
  6. why do i want to constantly tipe the word awesomeness?
  7.  awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness  awesomeness   
  8. drinking = awesomeness  
  9. jesus, how am i already up to 9
  10. why did i think posting this woudl be a good idea
  11. dont drink its bad for you. trust me kids, dont do it
  12. y0u twittr people are bad for encouraging me.e
  13. i'm about to listen to the laTEST BOMBCAST. WILL IT BE BETTER now WHEN DRUNK OR tomorrow when SOBER?
  14. DAMN CAPS LOCK KEY AGAIN
  15. sex = awesomeness
  16. why the hell am i so fat. someone needs to kick me into shape
  17. how the hell have i vome up wiuth so many dumb and stupid points
  18. why do i find this joke i jiust mad up about my mates recent ex girdlfriend so funny "why did web cross the road? because she was a dumb fuck and you need stop thinking about her!!!"
  19. why did i tell that joke to my friend
  20. why am is uch a terrible friendd?
  21. why am i still typing nonsens when i cood be in bed
  22. i've jus read over this blog gain. i couldn't stop laughting. it's hilarious.
  23. i;m sure it isne actually that funny, buyt its booom funny to me.
 
Rite, i'm sure thats it. goodnight.
#1 Posted by MattyFTM (14433 posts) -

Heys duders.it's st patrocks day and ive had a lot of guinness. I think im at the stage where: 

  • I can talk and type legibly
  • I am tallkign bullshite
but if this is complete crap and is undreadable, then i am sorry.
 
Anyways, here are a few random thoughts that pop into the head of t adrunk person: 
  1. Why did i drink this much?
  2. hOW MUCH DID i DRINK? 
  3. hOW DID i ACCIDENTALLY PRESS TH ECAPS LOCK KEY?
  4. why, in a shoping senter with one automatic door and lots of manule doors does everione go in and out in the auotomatic foor and no one used any of the the manyual doors?
  5. what does the user name mracoon mean? is it mr racoon, m racoon or just one thing mracoon?
  6. why do i want to constantly tipe the word awesomeness?
  7.  awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness awesomeness  awesomeness   
  8. drinking = awesomeness  
  9. jesus, how am i already up to 9
  10. why did i think posting this woudl be a good idea
  11. dont drink its bad for you. trust me kids, dont do it
  12. y0u twittr people are bad for encouraging me.e
  13. i'm about to listen to the laTEST BOMBCAST. WILL IT BE BETTER now WHEN DRUNK OR tomorrow when SOBER?
  14. DAMN CAPS LOCK KEY AGAIN
  15. sex = awesomeness
  16. why the hell am i so fat. someone needs to kick me into shape
  17. how the hell have i vome up wiuth so many dumb and stupid points
  18. why do i find this joke i jiust mad up about my mates recent ex girdlfriend so funny "why did web cross the road? because she was a dumb fuck and you need stop thinking about her!!!"
  19. why did i tell that joke to my friend
  20. why am is uch a terrible friendd?
  21. why am i still typing nonsens when i cood be in bed
  22. i've jus read over this blog gain. i couldn't stop laughting. it's hilarious.
  23. i;m sure it isne actually that funny, buyt its booom funny to me.
 
Rite, i'm sure thats it. goodnight.
#2 Posted by CornontheCobbe (2645 posts) -

You Absolute Legend.

#3 Posted by JJOR64 (19070 posts) -

This has to be the best blog post I have ever read.

#4 Edited by CornontheCobbe (2645 posts) -

He's gonna regret this tomorrow. Would be funny if a mod actually locked it though... the irony.
 
Oh well, it's only a bit of St. Patricks Day fun. I was like this last year. Posting drunken messages on the net : )

#5 Posted by ajamafalous (12165 posts) -

Can't be real.

#6 Posted by RoujinX (419 posts) -

 
And a moderator to boot!

#7 Posted by TimeWaffle (946 posts) -

this is great i will probably be that drunk later tonight

#8 Posted by JackiJinx (3091 posts) -

Thank you for this wonderful piece, Matty. You are loved.

#9 Edited by Tiwi (1402 posts) -
@MattyFTM said:

"sex = awesomeness
 

He's got the basics down. even if he's hammered
#10 Posted by Atomasist (2818 posts) -

Don't drink kids, or the bogeyman will get you.

#11 Posted by DanielJW (4915 posts) -

Being articulate was always Matty's thing. 

#12 Posted by AhmadMetallic (18954 posts) -

i must say that was fucking hilarious

#13 Posted by ajamafalous (12165 posts) -

Goodnight, sweet prince.

#14 Posted by AjayRaz (12477 posts) -

21/20 post 

#15 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -

I'm glad I don't drink and post a curious assortment of words on the forums. Whoops, never mind.

#16 Posted by MetalGearSunny (7003 posts) -

Ah, Matty. I love you.

#17 Posted by FluxWaveZ (19388 posts) -

War of the mods.

#18 Posted by Meowayne (6084 posts) -
#19 Posted by Andorski (5369 posts) -

This is spam.  Lock. =P

#20 Posted by Meowayne (6084 posts) -

" You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators."

#21 Posted by FluxWaveZ (19388 posts) -
@Meowayne said:
" " You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators." "
Haha, lovely.
#22 Edited by ThatFrood (3396 posts) -

Always drink... with moderation.

#23 Posted by AhmadMetallic (18954 posts) -
@Meowayne said:

" " You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators." "

fucking boom. 
 
@Meowayne said: 

"

"

do u ever think that you could be the dummy/one of the dumbasses? 
#24 Posted by Crocio (542 posts) -
@ThatFrood said:
" Always drink... with moderation. "
#25 Posted by Kyreo (4602 posts) -
@ajamafalous said:
" Can't be real. "
#26 Posted by AndrewB (7691 posts) -

How did you manage to post in the right forum if you're that drunk? Or maybe this should be filed under Halo?

#27 Posted by AhmadMetallic (18954 posts) -
@AndrewB said:
" How did you manage to post in the right forum if you're that drunk? Or maybe this should be filed under Halo? "
i c wat u did thar. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
you didnt do anything, did you?   then what the hell did i see
#28 Posted by PartTimeNinja (344 posts) -

Oh wow... this is epic.

#29 Posted by Tireyo (6451 posts) -

Happy St. Patrick's Day. Guinness to all, and to all a good night.

#30 Posted by JJOR64 (19070 posts) -
@Meowayne said:
" " You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators." "
You can't?  That's dumb.       :(
#31 Posted by RHCPfan24 (8609 posts) -

AH, EXCUSE ME....THIS IS, ER, SPAM AND DRUNKEN NONSENSE SO IT MUST BE LOCKED.....WAIT WHY I AM IN CAPS LOCK TOO?
 
 The fact that you are a moderator makes this all the better. ;)

#32 Posted by MB (13147 posts) -
@Meowayne said:
" " You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators." "
Hah.
 
This will never compare to Endogene, though.
Moderator
#33 Posted by Teptom (2047 posts) -

I knew this would be good when I saw  "drunklen" in the title.

#34 Posted by emkeighcameron (1876 posts) -

Can't flag? FUCK THAT I'M FLAGGIN RIGHT NOW
 

#35 Posted by RandomInternetUser (6789 posts) -
@ThatFrood said:
" Always drink... with moderation. "
HOT DAMN.  We have a winner.
#36 Posted by RsistncE (4496 posts) -
@MB said:
" @Meowayne said:
" " You cannot flag content authored by staff or moderators." "
Hah.  This will never compare to Endogene, though. "
"I am Endogene."
 
Forum drama at it's finest.
#37 Posted by RandomInternetUser (6789 posts) -
@MB: Was Endogene that duder that make an extreme melodramatic topic about him leaving the site?
#38 Posted by TheMustacheHero (6655 posts) -

Mods don't let other mods type drunk.

#39 Posted by Ace829 (2083 posts) -

#40 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -

In 500 years, after Ragnarapturageddocalypse (imagine every Doomsday scenario rolled into one) destroys society and we have vague hints of the past, many shall worship this as the words of a wise poet. And they'll be wrong :P.

#41 Posted by NoXious (1353 posts) -

I like it!

#42 Posted by alsnuts2 (675 posts) -

ha ha ha ha look on the bright side. Better on a website forum than in some girl's voicemail.  Cheers buddy!

#43 Posted by EdTwo (474 posts) -
@alsnuts2 said:
" ha ha ha ha look on the bright side. Better on a website forum than in some girl's voicemail.  Cheers buddy! "
Trust me it is. It happened to me on Saturday and she picked up. I made a ass of myself, but for some reason it was worth it :)
#44 Posted by Lowbrow (840 posts) -

This needs to be stickied.

#45 Posted by Apathylad (3067 posts) -

So that's what drunk typing looks like. I wonder if they'll be a public intoxication law for internet message boards....

#46 Posted by insouciant (710 posts) -

Now this is a great post for St. Patrick's Day. 
Even though it's contrived  =P

#47 Posted by Getz (3159 posts) -
@MattyFTM: Happy St. Patrick's day, I know exactly how you feel.
#48 Posted by Slax (963 posts) -

This is amazing!

#49 Posted by vidiot (2737 posts) -

Matty, you are now my favorite person ever.

#50 Posted by emkeighcameron (1876 posts) -
@xobballox said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Always drink... with moderation. "
HOT DAMN.  We have a winner. "
It took me like 4 hours to get that
 
/win

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