Hilarious 'Review' from the Wall Street Journal

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#151 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@PenguinDust said:

"Borderlands 2’s single-player campaign mode isn’t as good as what you’ll find in games like COD: Black Ops or the Medal of Honor series."

I played the last MoH and its single player was crap.

Medal of honor was horrid. 
#152 Edited by Jazzycola (662 posts) -

@mikey87144 said:

@Jazzycola said:

@JasonR86 said:

Who was that review for? I mean, what audience is supposed to take in that content and enjoy it and/or find it insightful?

I suppose its just a bullet point on what services they provide. When it comes to getting advertisers, they can go to video game companies and say "hey look we cover video games give us money". I wonder the exact same thing when IGN reviews tech or music.

IGN at least employs people who focus primarily on that. The people who review the tech, movies, and music rarely, if ever, review games. This dude reads like a guy who never played video games before but decided to take a stab at it.

Yeah...No,Scott Lowe cannot review a tech product to save his life. Just look at any one of his reviews of a phone and you'll see most of their reviews contain nothing but spec rather than critique of the product. None of them contain battery life information and I think i remember one of their reviews actually said the phone was unusable at times yet it still received a 8.5. I don't think tech should receive scores in the first place but the fact that they do means that most of their reviews are just promotions for said phone or tablet rather than a review

edit: Scott Lowe apparently no longer works for IGN and works for the verge.(also I know their movies/tv section do not review games but the tech section sure does considering Scott Lowe used to be a part of their Playstation team).

#153 Posted by PillClinton (3290 posts) -

@Barrock said:

Anyone else kinda weirded out that he's playing Borderlands 2 with his 14 year old son?

He probably had his hip, young, knowledgeable gamer son by his side while writing the review so it was appropriately understanding of games and game culture. Oh wait.

#154 Posted by President_Barackbar (3434 posts) -

@EvilNiGHTS said:

@President_Barackbar said:

This review is like if I said I hate NBA Jam because it's not an accurate representation of basketball like EA's latest NBA game.

I thought NBA Jam *was* EA's latest NBA game?

You know what I meant.

#155 Posted by EvilNiGHTS (1093 posts) -
@President_Barackbar

@EvilNiGHTS said:

@President_Barackbar said:

This review is like if I said I hate NBA Jam because it's not an accurate representation of basketball like EA's latest NBA game.

I thought NBA Jam *was* EA's latest NBA game?

You know what I meant.

Yes I did, but I had to be be pedantic because... The Internet.
#156 Posted by Godlyawesomeguy (6386 posts) -

@ThePickle said:

Borderlands 2’s single-player campaign mode isn’t as good as what you’ll find in games like COD: Black Ops or the Medal of Honor series.

I'd like to know if this person still has a job after reviewing this game so poorly. The above line says it all, really. Christ.

#157 Posted by HerbieBug (4212 posts) -

2900 comments on that article and counting. haha/.

#158 Posted by BoFooQ (659 posts) -

who are these people that think you can get any game for under $60, If I saw a new game that $40 I would assume the game is trash. Also I enjoyed how he slipped in that the first game sold 4.5 million copies, ask how many game developers wished their game sold over 4 million copies.

#159 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -

I got my friend to read this. She does not even play video games and seemed amazed at how poorly its written. 

#160 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -

WAIT! 
 
I was thinking. This has to be the most hits they have gotten on their site in a long time right? ITS A STUNG! STOP CLICKING THE LINK! No man could be that stupid. It is a plot to get site views! 

#161 Posted by guiseppe (2837 posts) -

That is quite possibly the worst professional review I've ever read. That said, I'd love to see more reviews from him.

#162 Posted by captain_clayman (3319 posts) -

Why the hell is the wall street journal doing game reviews. that's what i want to know.

#163 Posted by Shakey1245 (64 posts) -

@captain_clayman: It's in a part of the WSJ website that deals with " media, entertainment, celebrity and the arts ", where the editors have handed this poor sap the duty of reviewing games and on his first try has managed to commit the internet gaming culture equivalent of walking into a five star restaurant and asking for a Big Mac.

#164 Posted by Cozmicaztaway (216 posts) -

@EvilNiGHTS said:

@President_Barackbar

@EvilNiGHTS said:

@President_Barackbar said:

This review is like if I said I hate NBA Jam because it's not an accurate representation of basketball like EA's latest NBA game.

I thought NBA Jam *was* EA's latest NBA game?

You know what I meant.

Yes I did, but I had to be be pedantic because... The Internet.

For what it's worth, I totally laughed at it, because.. well, sick burn on EA.

As for the review, well, I mean, we should all listen to the man, he clearly knows what gamers want, which is CoD, more CoD and then some CoD.. He'd probably be better off playing Homefront.

Also, MAG has 256-player multiplayer, so clearly it is the greatest game of all time, right?

#165 Edited by Dagbiker (6939 posts) -

@Shakey1245 said:

@captain_clayman: It's in a part of the WSJ website that deals with " media, entertainment, celebrity and the arts ", where the editors have handed this poor sap the duty of reviewing games and on his first try has managed to commit the internet gaming culture equivalent of walking into a five star restaurant and asking for a Big Mac.

Actually :

http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2012/08/24/madden-nfl-13-signals-future-doesnt-quite-hold-together/

and

http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2011/08/26/madden-nfl-12-keeps-the-hits-coming/

#166 Posted by Shakey1245 (64 posts) -

@Dagbiker: Ah good point. It was 4 in the morning when I wrote that and couldn't be bothered fiddling around with their site in order to find more of his stuff. A cursory search also brought back reviews of NHL 13 and Halo Reach, the latter of which starts with this fantastic admission;

I haven’t played a first-person shooter since Castle Wolfenstein came out on 3.5-inch floppy disks.
#167 Posted by Death_Burnout (3792 posts) -

I completely lost it at "...I read on several sites that COD: Black Ops 2 will feature up to six teams, for a total of 18 simultaneous players, in multiplayer mode."

"I read on several sites"? Yeah, terrible. Hate to belabour the point, but wow! What's worse is that most of the comments appear to be more concerned with the CoD comparison (which is bad of course) rather than the awful writing.

#168 Posted by Zuldim (288 posts) -

"Borderlands 2 falls short because it’s missing several key elements you need to have in a 2012 first-person shooter game – most notably, a rich multiplayer online mode."

....No. Just no. It's without a "competitive" multiplayer mode, but it's built to play co-op great. I haven't even played it yet, and this is insultingly stupid.

#169 Posted by MuttersomeTaxicab (667 posts) -

@guiseppe said:

That is quite possibly the worst professional review I've ever read. That said, I'd love to see more reviews from him.

THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS.

At least until he accidentally starts writing ok reviews, then I'll stop caring.

#170 Posted by minotaka (320 posts) -

@Intelligent_Space_Man said:

I don't know what you all are talking about.. he's clearly put, like, a whole bunch of research into this--

  • Wikipedia descriptions
  • VGChartz.com
  • "Several Sites", he read on..

and--

  • The back of the box.

I mean, who reads the entire Game Box? This guy is thorough.

I read the game box :'( I really do!

#171 Posted by Porkellain (253 posts) -

@steveurkel said:

(before half life ruined them)

Troll Detected

#172 Posted by strangeling (1260 posts) -

A person is definitely entitled to have their own opinion. And an opinion cannot be wrong. But what of an opinion that is grossly uninformed/misinformed? Surely, that is wrong.

#173 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@strangeling

A person is definitely entitled to have their own opinion. And an opinion cannot be wrong. But what of an opinion that is grossly uninformed/misinformed? Surely, that is wrong.

I agree with that. I think sports games are dumb. But once and a wile I see something that's awesome in them. I can admit ya they can be real cool at points. But they are just not for me.
#174 Edited by TMThomsen (2070 posts) -

In Team Fortress 2, you can be 32 players on 2 teams. That's 8 times the amount of players and twice the number of teams compared to Borderlands 2! Ergo, Team Fortress 2 is better than Borderlands 2.

See? I can also be a game journalist.

Also:

At twice that price, though, I think it’s fair for players to demand the whole magilla – cutting-edge development, engrossing campaign gameplay, scads of downloadable content, a rich social media/community experience, sharing of loot and gear and online multiplayer modes that keep you and your friends coming back until the next version of the game comes out.

WHAT?

#175 Posted by Winsord (1165 posts) -

@TMThomsen said:

In Team Fortress 2, you can be 32 players on 2 teams. That's 8 times the amount of players and twice the number of teams compared to Borderlands 2! Ergo, Team Fortress 2 is better than Borderlands 2.

See? I can also be a game journalist.

Let's all just play MAG.

#176 Posted by CornBREDX (4806 posts) -

Its unfortunate people are harrassing him. I mean leaving a comment on his terrible review is one thing, but lets not start harrassing him ya'll. It's not like he killed somebody, threatened anyone with violence, or some other nasty thing. He may not like Borderlands (and in some ways, even though he articulates it terribly, I agree with one or two of his points that he attempted to make) but that doesn't make him prime target for harrassment. 
 
Let's leave the poor guy alone, internet, eh? For me? Cus we love each other so much?  
Cool? Cool.

#177 Posted by TheHumanDove (2523 posts) -

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

#178 Edited by connerthekewlkid (1803 posts) -

@Winsord said:

@TMThomsen said:

In Team Fortress 2, you can be 32 players on 2 teams. That's 8 times the amount of players and twice the number of teams compared to Borderlands 2! Ergo, Team Fortress 2 is better than Borderlands 2.

See? I can also be a game journalist.

Let's all just play MAG.

@Winsord: RAVEN ALL THE WAY

#179 Posted by TeflonBilly (4713 posts) -

@TheHumanDove said:

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

Wait, he's clearly incompetent at his job and with his job potentially harming the livelyhoods of scads of other people involved with the development of this game. It would be irresponsible NOT to wish he lost his job.

It's as if you knew somebody who was handling people's food never washed their hands. Their shitty work might just hurt an unkown amount of people.

#180 Posted by TheHumanDove (2523 posts) -

@TeflonBilly said:

@TheHumanDove said:

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

Wait, he's clearly incompetent at his job and with his job potentially harming the livelyhoods of scads of other people involved with the development of this game. It would be irresponsible NOT to wish he lost his job.

It's as if you knew somebody who was handling people's food never washed their hands. Their shitty work might just hurt an unkown amount of people.

He learned a lesson as it is. And I'm sure the poor souls at gearbox will be fine at the end of the day. His opinion isn't quite the same as safe food practices

#181 Edited by TeflonBilly (4713 posts) -

@TheHumanDove said:

@TeflonBilly said:

@TheHumanDove said:

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

Wait, he's clearly incompetent at his job and with his job potentially harming the livelyhoods of scads of other people involved with the development of this game. It would be irresponsible NOT to wish he lost his job.

It's as if you knew somebody who was handling people's food never washed their hands. Their shitty work might just hurt an unkown amount of people.

He learned a lesson as it is. And I'm sure the poor souls at gearbox will be fine at the end of the day. His opinion isn't quite the same as safe food practices

He's learned his lesson? I've yet to see a retraction or apology for his downright deceitful "review". Incompetence of this kind should not be tolerated at this level. This is bush league!

#182 Edited by TheHumanDove (2523 posts) -

@TeflonBilly said:

@TheHumanDove said:

@TeflonBilly said:

@TheHumanDove said:

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

Wait, he's clearly incompetent at his job and with his job potentially harming the livelyhoods of scads of other people involved with the development of this game. It would be irresponsible NOT to wish he lost his job.

It's as if you knew somebody who was handling people's food never washed their hands. Their shitty work might just hurt an unkown amount of people.

He learned a lesson as it is. And I'm sure the poor souls at gearbox will be fine at the end of the day. His opinion isn't quite the same as safe food practices

He's learned his lesson? I've yet to see a retraction or apology for his downright deceitful "review". Incompetence of this level should not be tolerated on this level. This is bush league!

I'm fairly sure he's going to take something away from over three thousand comments telling him that he's wrong, and why he's wrong. Or maybe he'll just laugh at all the nerd rage. Hard to say, really.

#183 Posted by CornBREDX (4806 posts) -
@TeflonBilly: I think you're taking it a tad too seriously. Game reviews still do not affect a majority of video game sales that much (except smaller games which seem to thrive on them- I don't think Gearbox is in this category these days) and are generally considered more for the core gamers (for lack of a better term). Being that the game industry is as big as it is now, I can see merit in this kind of opinion in a game review. The problem is, the maybe only people who will read it are the core gamers- it's a problem I don't think has been solved yet (but many try).   
 
I think the idea of a non gamer reviewing games is actually refreshing, anyway. I get that he's uninformed, using vastly incomprehensible comparisons, (game wise) uneducated, and his grammar actually seems to need some work (maybe he doesn't have an editor? I don't know what that's about) but I find outside opinions as interesting as inside ones. With some time and effort he may be more informed (if he cared to) but it would also change the way his reviews are formed and I'm not sure that would vastly improve his opinion (which, let's be honest here, the backlash is more so because he reviewed Borderlands 2 poorly- no one cares, when he reviews other games, what he writes about them). 
 
He doesn't need to lose his job, and no one is dieing because of his review. Lets tone that down just a notch.
#184 Posted by BreakfastKing (103 posts) -

@CornBREDX said:

@TeflonBilly: I think you're taking it a tad too seriously. Game reviews still do not affect a majority of video game sales that much (except smaller games which seem to thrive on them- I don't think Gearbox is in this category these days) and are generally considered more for the core gamers (for lack of a better term). Being that the game industry is as big as it is now, I can see merit in this kind of opinion in a game review.

Regardless of whether game reviews affect sales for major releases such as Borderlands 2, the sad truth is that some large publishers rely heavily on aggregate scores such as Metacritic to dish out bonuses to the developers and determine who gets to work on what for their next game. Although I doubt 2K is one of those publishers, EA and Activision certainly have been (and presumably still are). While there's nothing wrong with having a dissenting opinion, having one that seems so uneducated AND (here's the important bit) is published by a reputable news organization, in this case the WSJ, can have adverse affects on the livelihoods of those that make the games we love. And hey, if a game sucks and doesn't hit its metacritic score, better luck next time. But "credible" reviews that seem to be, in certain parts, objectively wrong aren't doing anybody any favors. Not the reviewer. Not the developers. Not the casual audience that may be swayed by WSJ.

#185 Posted by CornBREDX (4806 posts) -
@BreakfastKing: I, again, don't think Gearbox is really hurt by this review.  
While your point about potential issue with it doing no one any favors either- while noted- I want to interject that I don't think the Borderlands 2 review has hurt the game industry. It's not like it is the first review that has been put up on speakeasy's site and no one complained before.  

Interestingly, though, the Sleeping Dogs review on there is quite interesting (I was attempting to research more of this guys work, but it's extremely complicated and I cant figure out where to find the actual video game reviews so I just searched for video games which only came back with Borderlands 2, NHL 2013, and Sleeping Dogs [Note: he did NHL2013 also- maybe his forte is sports games?]). The only comments on Sleeping Dogs (imo a better written if still slightly uninformed piece) were a spam bot and someone informing of the reason behind the True Crime legacy. 
 
Anyway, sorry I went off on a tangent. I was going to say more about this earth shattering review, but I couldn't find what I was looking for. Needless to say, the guys review is bad- but I wouldn't say he should be fired. I'm not even sure how they assign articles (there seems to be thousands of writers on this site, it must all be free lance or something- i don't know- i've not really been on a site like this much as the navigation is awful imo) but I don't think their video game reviews hold much merit for anything that matters to publishers that care about reviews (such as metacritic) or a casual audience who I don't think would even find this review if not for all the commotion people like us are making about it.
#186 Posted by jakob187 (21642 posts) -

@steveurkel said:

I'm glad someone didn't like this piece of shit. The first game was terrible and this one is no worse. Yes I've played it. Maxed out graphics on a PC - it looks like shit, it plays like shit. First person shooters are fucking a thing of the past because this is the garbage people are interested in playing. This guy is not clueless, he is informed. He probably played good first person shooters (before half life ruined them). What a joke this game turned out to be. It is great that Jeff likes it because I like jeff but I don't care about other peoples opinions it is a bad game. I'm mad I wasted money on it because my friends convinced me to buy it hurr it will be fun yup it isnt. Surprise. Another shitty game from gearbox.

This perplexes me. I need a moment to sit down and really analyze this, because it could very well be one of the greatest trolls in the history of the internet.

As for the OP, looking to WSJ for gaming advice is like looking to Ryan Dunn for driving advice: it's pointless and someone will get hurt by the end of it all.

#187 Posted by VoshiNova (1640 posts) -

Holy shit that is bad.

*slaps tongue against roof of mouth*

That was really really bad.

#188 Posted by Belialjtg87 (40 posts) -

eh bonerfart.... i don't think it would be too far to assume that guy didn't play BL2 outisde of the first 4-6 hours. Also, it's pretty evident he only plays games or at least spectates most likely from his 14 year old son.

#189 Posted by TheMasterDS (2015 posts) -

@TheHumanDove said:

@TeflonBilly said:

@TheHumanDove said:

I cringe when I see people talk about how they hope that he's fired. Hoping someone loses their job is a fucking terrible thing. That's their livelihood. Sure, it's a shitty review that seems to not grasp the right points, but he has kids and stuff. I never hope people lose their jobs.

Wait, he's clearly incompetent at his job and with his job potentially harming the livelyhoods of scads of other people involved with the development of this game. It would be irresponsible NOT to wish he lost his job.

It's as if you knew somebody who was handling people's food never washed their hands. Their shitty work might just hurt an unkown amount of people.

He learned a lesson as it is. And I'm sure the poor souls at gearbox will be fine at the end of the day. His opinion isn't quite the same as safe food practices

He's working a professionals' job and he himself is a hack. I'm sure there are plenty of qualified people who would like work who could fill his shoes and be competent at the same time. What about them? Do you consider them?

#190 Posted by Nilazz (607 posts) -

' Hey this isn't Call of Duty?! Well then this shit sucks. '

#191 Posted by OldManLight (828 posts) -

i didn't know the wall street journal employed incompetent game journalists...but i do now. Time to dust off my resume.

#192 Posted by KoolAid (839 posts) -
#193 Edited by Gruff182 (852 posts) -

Guys don't buy Borderlands 2. It doesn't have multiplayer like CoD or teh 'Halos'.

Also, they've used a unique cartoony art style instead of making it anime and hip.

#194 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -

Still amazed no statement has been made. Even if he did not like the game his writing is horrid and its clear he did little to no research.

#195 Posted by Brandino (246 posts) -

@Barrock said:

Anyone else kinda weirded out that he's playing Borderlands 2 with his 14 year old son?

Why? I play games like BL with my 15 year old nephew.

Wait, are you one of those people? Who thinks anyone under 18 shouldn't play M rated games?

#196 Posted by Jrinswand (1695 posts) -

Ahhhh! That reads exactly like a freshman comp paper! I had to force myself to stop counting the grammar errors and writing taboos.

#197 Posted by Barrock (3525 posts) -

@Brandino said:

@Barrock said:

Anyone else kinda weirded out that he's playing Borderlands 2 with his 14 year old son?

Why? I play games like BL with my 15 year old nephew.

Wait, are you one of those people? Who thinks anyone under 18 shouldn't play M rated games?

No I've got no problem with kids under 18 playing M rated games. It just felt like he was trying to be the cool dad who lets his kid play games where you go to a strip club.

Now an uncle doing that? That makes you a cool uncle.

#198 Posted by AhmadMetallic (18955 posts) -

@Gruff182 said:

Guys don't buy Borderlands 2. It doesn't have multiplayer like CoD or teh 'Halos'.

Why do other games even EXIST? I never understood this. Games should all be calls of halos!

#199 Posted by Brandino (246 posts) -

@Barrock said:

@Brandino said:

@Barrock said:

Anyone else kinda weirded out that he's playing Borderlands 2 with his 14 year old son?

Why? I play games like BL with my 15 year old nephew.

Wait, are you one of those people? Who thinks anyone under 18 shouldn't play M rated games?

No I've got no problem with kids under 18 playing M rated games. It just felt like he was trying to be the cool dad who lets his kid play games where you go to a strip club.

Now an uncle doing that? That makes you a cool uncle.

I strive to be the cool uncle, because nobody wants to be the creepy uncle.

#200 Edited by Legion_ (1256 posts) -

Wow, this is the worst review I'v ever read.

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