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    Burnout CRASH!

    Game » consists of 7 releases. Released Sep 20, 2011

    Crash mode gets a whole new perspective in this downloadable Burnout game.

    Burnout Crash, the Cartoony Top-Down Racer (With Lobster Monsters) You've Wanted All These Years

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    alex

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    Edited By alex

    We caught wind of the existence of Burnout Crash! thanks to the Australian Classification Review Board and their penchant for acknowledging games that have been put into their ratings database, regardless as to whether or not PR people have bothered to announce them yet. Now, the ESRB has gone a step further and written up one of their famously awkward summaries of what the game actually is, and... well, you know what? Why don't you just read for yourself.

     The most disturbing lobster monster of them all.
     The most disturbing lobster monster of them all.

    This is an action game in which players earn points for creating traffic pileups. From a top-down perspective, players initiate crashes by driving 'cartoony' vehicles (e.g., cars, trucks, vans, buses) into busy intersections; multiple crashes trigger score multipliers and rack up large 'bills' of property damage. Each level is accompanied by crashing sounds, small explosions, and vocal encouragement (e.g., 'Cool,' 'Maximum Carnage!'). In some levels, players are instructed to crash into police cars (e.g., 'Crash them before they bust you!'); in other sequences, oversized airplanes, tornados, lobster monsters, and UFOs slide across the screen, destroying any vehicles in their path.

    Okay, let all that sink in for a moment. I'll wait.

    == TEASER ==We good? Excellent. So, on the subject of the top-down perspective, that would certainly fit, given that the current assumption is that this will be an Xbox Live Arcade and PlayStation Network download. It also sounds like this game is, true to its subtitle, largely based around some kind of permutation of the classic console games' crash mode. As for the crashing into police cars? Sure! Why not? We all love crashing into cops. And the oversized airplanes, tornadoes, UFOs, and lobster monsters? I mean, hey! We can... I mean, you know, it's probably just... I mean, I love SimCity, and that game totally had... alright, you know what? I give up. I don't know what to do with any of that.

    For what it's worth, the game is rated E-10+. Probably because of all the lobster monsters. No child should have to endure such a thing.
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    alex

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    #1  Edited By alex

    We caught wind of the existence of Burnout Crash! thanks to the Australian Classification Review Board and their penchant for acknowledging games that have been put into their ratings database, regardless as to whether or not PR people have bothered to announce them yet. Now, the ESRB has gone a step further and written up one of their famously awkward summaries of what the game actually is, and... well, you know what? Why don't you just read for yourself.

     The most disturbing lobster monster of them all.
     The most disturbing lobster monster of them all.

    This is an action game in which players earn points for creating traffic pileups. From a top-down perspective, players initiate crashes by driving 'cartoony' vehicles (e.g., cars, trucks, vans, buses) into busy intersections; multiple crashes trigger score multipliers and rack up large 'bills' of property damage. Each level is accompanied by crashing sounds, small explosions, and vocal encouragement (e.g., 'Cool,' 'Maximum Carnage!'). In some levels, players are instructed to crash into police cars (e.g., 'Crash them before they bust you!'); in other sequences, oversized airplanes, tornados, lobster monsters, and UFOs slide across the screen, destroying any vehicles in their path.

    Okay, let all that sink in for a moment. I'll wait.

    == TEASER ==We good? Excellent. So, on the subject of the top-down perspective, that would certainly fit, given that the current assumption is that this will be an Xbox Live Arcade and PlayStation Network download. It also sounds like this game is, true to its subtitle, largely based around some kind of permutation of the classic console games' crash mode. As for the crashing into police cars? Sure! Why not? We all love crashing into cops. And the oversized airplanes, tornadoes, UFOs, and lobster monsters? I mean, hey! We can... I mean, you know, it's probably just... I mean, I love SimCity, and that game totally had... alright, you know what? I give up. I don't know what to do with any of that.

    For what it's worth, the game is rated E-10+. Probably because of all the lobster monsters. No child should have to endure such a thing.
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    Yummylee

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    #2  Edited By Yummylee

    Cool maximum carnage, bro!

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    Phoenix87

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    #3  Edited By Phoenix87

    Space Lobsters or no sale.

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    WaywardGamer

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    #4  Edited By WaywardGamer

    Maximum Chloe.

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    Sbaitso

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    #5  Edited By Sbaitso

    I'll wait for DJ Atomica to be confirmed till I put any of my money down!
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    sameeeeam

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    #6  Edited By sameeeeam

    They should  just sell the Lobster Monsters separately.

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    bcjohnnie

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    #7  Edited By bcjohnnie

    I guess I'm not sure what the problem is... sure this isn't going to be a new real Burnout game, but done right, this could be a lot of fun.  I really really miss crash mode, so a simplified version of that with any depth at all could be worth picking up.


    I'm not exactly sure what "cartoony" means here though.
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    Klaimore

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    #8  Edited By Klaimore

    What about normal size lobsters in a tornado?

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    SaturdayNightSpecials

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    Sounds fun, but I wonder if the crashes will be as interesting in a cartoon style.

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    Skald

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    #10  Edited By Skald

    That sounds crazy. I just hope it's crazy in the right kind of way.

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    lockwoodx

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    #11  Edited By lockwoodx

    Gotta get them before they get you!
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    JJOR64

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    #12  Edited By JJOR64

    So this isn't a main game?  Poop.

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    deactivated-60339640361ae

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    What. The. Fuck.

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    hero_swe

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    #14  Edited By hero_swe
    @Buzzkill said:
    "
                   

    Gotta get them before they get you!

                "

    Dada-chum, Dida-chick, Deda-check?
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    I_smell

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    #15  Edited By I_smell

    Sounds like an iPhone game.

    Y'know, like that one where you have to manage traffic n not crash cars?

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    Tekkor

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    #16  Edited By Tekkor

    Ingame image...



    No Caption Provided
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    Yanngc33

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    #17  Edited By Yanngc33

    So there is no reason to care

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    AncientMecha

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    #18  Edited By AncientMecha

    Somebody call Carbon Neutral Games, sounds like EA's ripping off Unsafe At Any Speed.

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    hexogen

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    #19  Edited By hexogen

    Top-down perspective? I'll pass. Chase camera fo' lyfe, son.

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    Romination

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    #20  Edited By Romination

    Sounds like Cobra Triangle with cars?

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    ht101

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    #21  Edited By ht101

    The only thing in that description that doesn't make sense is that the cars, trucks, buses and vans were described as cartoony.  What the hell does that even mean?

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    chilibean_3

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    #22  Edited By chilibean_3

    Lobster Dog is the greatest!

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    LordCmdrStryker

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    #23  Edited By LordCmdrStryker

    This is the way EA is headed, so I'm more disappointed than surprised.  I guess I'll just have to live with Burnout Paradise for the rest of my natural life.

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    JoshyLee

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    #24  Edited By JoshyLee

    You can crash for MAXIMUM DAMAGE!

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    falconer

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    #25  Edited By falconer

    I have a feeling this is made by some offshoot EA developer, and not Criterion. But if it is Criterion, I would bet this came out of a drunken conversation, someone remembered it, and they've gone mad with power.

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    kennybaese

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    #26  Edited By kennybaese

    All I needed to hear was lobster monsters. Provided PSN ever comes back online, I will buy this in an instant. 

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    FlipperDesert

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    #27  Edited By FlipperDesert

    Lobster monsters? No, what you have to watch out of is those fucking coconut crabs. They stole Amelia Earhart's remains!

    Seriously though EA, just make a real Burnout sequel.

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    Xeiphyer

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    #28  Edited By Xeiphyer

    Wasting the franchise!!

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    andriv

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    #29  Edited By andriv
    @Hero_Swe: @Buzzkill said:
    "

    Gotta get them before they get you!
    "
    thats exactly what I thought of, lobstrosities.
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    Choffy

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    #30  Edited By Choffy

    Just green light another real Burnout game, EA. Do it. DO IT.

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    Rotnac

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    #31  Edited By Rotnac

    Now I fully regret trading in my copy of Paradise...

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    icytower38

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    #32  Edited By icytower38

    As long as Criterion is developing, it'll probably kick some major ass no matter how off the wall it sounds at this point.

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    Eribuster

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    #33  Edited By Eribuster

    I hope there is another big Burnout in the works. Crash sounds like an offshoot with a Battlefield Heroes art style.

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    Red12b

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    #34  Edited By Red12b

    MAXIMUM CARNAGE!
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    AhmadMetallic

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    #35  Edited By AhmadMetallic

    sure why the hell not

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    JJWeatherman

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    #36  Edited By JJWeatherman

    Hmm. Well, the concept of lobster monsters is obviously very exciting, but I'm just not sure.

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    deadmonkeys

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    #37  Edited By deadmonkeys

    My friends and I loved the insurance tallies in the original Burnout, and would often play "crash mode" before it was released as an official game type in Burnout 3.

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    craigbo180

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    #38  Edited By craigbo180

    So an budget downloadable arcadey version of burnout?


    Could be tight.
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    kidman

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    #39  Edited By kidman
    @JJOR64 said:
    " So this isn't a main game?  Poop. "
    This.
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    FreakAche

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    #40  Edited By FreakAche

    Sounds like this has potential, but they really need to get on making a full fledged new Burnout game. It's been three years already! Come on!

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    cowswithguns

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    #41  Edited By cowswithguns

    Wouldn't it be crazy if this is more dlc for burnout paradise?! I could see them pulling that one....but whatever it is, if its being developed by criterion I'm sure it'll be good.

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    Cronson

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    #42  Edited By Cronson

    DJ Atomica!

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    blalala

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    #43  Edited By blalala

    Oh man, I'll reserve judgement until I see actual gameplay, but damn. Also, is this a Criterion developed game?!

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    deactivated-5b531a34b946c

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    Sounds like Crash Mode, so I'm cautiously optimistic. When you break it down, it's really just a puzzle game, so it could work from the top-down angle and there's room for some crazy stuff.

    I'll reserve judgment until more info, and hopefully some video surfaces, but I would be down for some more Crash Mode, even if it's a little weirder and has a different camera.

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    Googly

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    #45  Edited By Googly

    Lobster sticks to magnet.

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    MisterMouse

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    #46  Edited By MisterMouse

    ahh hohoho puppy!!!1

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    MooseyMcMan

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    #47  Edited By MooseyMcMan

    I'm not gonna lie, lobster monsters totally make me want to play it more. 

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    Subway_Ninja

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    #48  Edited By Subway_Ninja

    this game sounds great

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    Roddykat

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    #49  Edited By Roddykat

    Damn shame what they did to that puppy.

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    xpgamer7

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    #50  Edited By xpgamer7

    ESRB made it sound evil and crazy. I fully expect a T rating if not a E10.

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