Sinners beware, Captain Bible is here!

#1 Posted by Giantkitty (808 posts) -

Captain Bible is now at GB and if you're a sinner, he'll pop a verse up yo' ass!

caption
#2 Posted by Max_Chill (162 posts) -

he looks jewish

#3 Posted by Vinchenzo (6192 posts) -
Summary

The game centers around a city of humans which was one day encased by a Dome of Darkness, perpetrated by 'cybers,' who have trapped the citizens in lies. While the organization known as Bible Corps has managed to make a hole in the dome, they have not been able to accomplish much more.

Captain Bible is engaged by Bible Corps to be beamed into the city. Though he is able to take his computer Bible with him, all of the verses are erased. To remedy this, Bible Corps beams Scripture stations into the city where he may reload it. Gameplay centers around Captain Bible obtaining these verses and using them to confront the cybers who roam the halls of the buildings in the city. An optional feature allows the player to actually engage the cybers in hand-to-hand combat, which is performed using the Sword of the Spirit and the Shield of Faith .

The game is presumably set in the somewhat distant future based upon several of the game details, including the cybers themselves, the transporter-type device used to beam Captain Bible into the Dome, and the spacecraft he uses in the opening screen to fly to the command post.
#4 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish.
#5 Posted by jNerd (2015 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
...sugar tits
#6 Posted by Max_Chill (162 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
and half Hindu.
#7 Edited by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
and half Hindu."

I'm not going to sit here like some kind of cocksucker and explain to you the insanely clever subtlety of my joke and how it references the first half of the Bible being the Jewish half, I'm just going to keep on firing these out of control thoughts clear over your head.
#8 Posted by Max_Chill (162 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
and half Hindu."

I'm not going to sit here and explain to you the insanely clever subtlety of my joke and how it references the first half of the Bible being the Jewish half, I'm just going to keep on firing these out of control thoughts clear over your head."
and half Scientologist and half Mormon 
#9 Posted by Giantkitty (808 posts) -

I thought he looked like a clean cut American, God's 2nd favoritest country after Israel.

#10 Posted by Max_Chill (162 posts) -
Giantkitty said:
God's 2nd favoritest country after Australia."
fixed
#11 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
and half Hindu."

I'm not going to sit here and explain to you the insanely clever subtlety of my joke and how it references the first half of the Bible being the Jewish half, I'm just going to keep on firing these out of control thoughts clear over your head."
and half Scientologist and half Mormon "
caption
#12 Posted by Max_Chill (162 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Max_Chill said:
"he looks jewish"
He's only half Jewish."
and half Hindu."

I'm not going to sit here and explain to you the insanely clever subtlety of my joke and how it references the first half of the Bible being the Jewish half, I'm just going to keep on firing these out of control thoughts clear over your head."
and half Scientologist and half Mormon "
caption
"
and he is also Buddha..........but only at night
#13 Posted by clubsandwich (3795 posts) -

is this the inferior version of Super Jesus?

#14 Posted by ColumnBreaker (1164 posts) -

I somehow don't feel safer in his presence.

#15 Posted by jakob187 (21757 posts) -

BIFF!!!  Haven't seen your kitteh-goggled self in ages, or so it seems!!!

As for the topic at hand...there is only ONE captain that matters:

CAPTAIN CAAAAAAAAVEMAN!!!
What?  You thought I was gonna say "Planet", didn't ya?  You fools.  =  P
#16 Posted by Giantkitty (808 posts) -
Max_Chill said:
"Giantkitty said:
God's 2nd favoritest country after Australia."
fixed"
... he did give them kangaroos and Crocodile Dundee
#17 Edited by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
jakob187 said:
"BIFF!!!  Haven't seen your kitteh-goggled self in ages, or so it seems!!!

I was permanently banned from Gamespot years ago for sending Rich Gallup a picture of an MS Paint turd fucking another MS Paint turd in the ass after he asked people to send in creative user-created Guerilla Games mascots on the Hotspot.
#18 Posted by jakob187 (21757 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"I was permanently banned from Gamespot years ago for sending Rich Gallup a picture of an MS Paint turd fucking another MS Paint in the ass after he asked people to send in a Guerilla Games mascot on the Hotspot.
"
What does THAT have to do with ANYTHING in this thread?  Biff...you're losing it.
#19 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
jakob187 said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"I was permanently banned from Gamespot years ago for sending Rich Gallup a picture of an MS Paint turd fucking another MS Paint in the ass after he asked people to send in a Guerilla Games mascot on the Hotspot.
"
What does THAT have to do with ANYTHING in this thread?  Biff...you're losing it."
Listen I'll say the same thing to you that I said to Rich Gallup, this is just a small misunderstanding. Clearly we're on different pages here.
#20 Posted by jakob187 (21757 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"jakob187 said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"I was permanently banned from Gamespot years ago for sending Rich Gallup a picture of an MS Paint turd fucking another MS Paint in the ass after he asked people to send in a Guerilla Games mascot on the Hotspot.
"
What does THAT have to do with ANYTHING in this thread?  Biff...you're losing it."
Listen I'll say the same thing to you that I said to Rich Gallup, this is just a small misunderstanding. Clearly we're on different pages here."
LOL  Comical to the point of making me wheeze...but still don't see the point in talking about "fucking shit" in this thread.  You have me lost...and yet the goggles keep me laughing.
#21 Posted by Colonel_Cool (808 posts) -

Ha ha, reminds me of that video game on Bart was playing with Rod and Tod on the Simpsons in the episode where Maude dies.

#22 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
jakob187 said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"jakob187 said:
"BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"I was permanently banned from Gamespot years ago for sending Rich Gallup a picture of an MS Paint turd fucking another MS Paint in the ass after he asked people to send in a Guerilla Games mascot on the Hotspot.
"
What does THAT have to do with ANYTHING in this thread?  Biff...you're losing it."
Listen I'll say the same thing to you that I said to Rich Gallup, this is just a small misunderstanding. Clearly we're on different pages here."
LOL  Comical to the point of making me wheeze...but still don't see the point in talking about "fucking shit" in this thread.  You have me lost...and yet the goggles keep me laughing."

caption
#23 Posted by jakob187 (21757 posts) -
Biff....I got the point.  You made a funny think out of poo.

The thing is I don't understand how it pertains to Captain Bible...or his superior, Captain Caveman!
#24 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

I absolutely made a funny think out of poo.

#25 Posted by jakob187 (21757 posts) -

That's how much I laugh at your shit.  You affects muh spellins.

WHEE-OOH!  WHEE-OOH!

YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!!! QUIT LAUGHING AT BIFF'S SHIT!!!

#26 Posted by Endogene (4741 posts) -

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