Completely hypothetical question

#1 Posted by FiestaUnicorn (1576 posts) -

If I were to play CS: GO on the PC with a controller how badly would I do?

#2 Edited by ShaggE (5981 posts) -

All of the badly.

You'll redefine "badly", in fact. People will plug in their controllers while playing CS, and a message will pop up saying "Badly Mode Activated", because "badly" will have come to be defined as "playing CS with a controller".

A guy will make a dubstep remix of you playing CS with a controller, and it will get approximately 592 views and four comments. Oddly, most of those views will be from Connecticut, and the uploader will put an annotation in their video pointing out this fact after checking their view statistics, but he'll remove the annotation after a couple of days because he decided that this fact isn't very interesting.

Somebody will try, and fail, to create a meme involving your k/d ratio. It'll be called "Funny k/d ratio controller guy", and it'll be awful. It will go entirely unnoticed, and the creator will feel bad and go back to submitting images to The Cheezburger Network. His name is Timothy, and he's currently at a 7/11 trying to decide between Slim Jims and a bag of Combos.

EDIT: He'll go with the Slim Jims.

#3 Posted by xaLieNxGrEyx (2576 posts) -

I've played it with a controller it's not impossible

#4 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -

You'll get schooled by anyone who can semi-competently play with a keyboard and mouse, unfortunately.

The only PC FPS I've seen someone do well at with a controller is TF2 playing Medic or Heavy (and even then the lack of sensitivity makes you vulnerable)

#5 Posted by FiestaUnicorn (1576 posts) -

@ShaggE said:

All of the badly.

You'll redefine "badly", in fact. People will plug in their controllers while playing CS, and a message will pop up saying "Badly Mode Activated", because "badly" will have come to be defined as "playing CS with a controller".

A guy will make a dubstep remix of you playing CS with a controller, and it will get approximately 592 views and four comments. Oddly, most of those views will be from Connecticut, and the uploader will put an annotation in their video pointing out this fact after checking their view statistics, but he'll remove the annotation after a couple of days because he decided that this fact isn't very interesting.

Somebody will try, and fail, to create a meme involving your k/d ratio. It'll be called "Funny k/d ratio controller guy", and it'll be awful. It will go entirely unnoticed, and the creator will feel bad and go back to submitting images to The Cheezburger Network. His name is Timothy, and he's currently at a 7/11 trying to decide between Slim Jims and a bag of Combos.

EDIT: He'll go with the Slim Jims.

I only play objective based shooters to get a high k/d. How good would my k/d be?

#6 Posted by ShaggE (5981 posts) -

@FiestaUnicorn said:

@ShaggE said:

All of the badly.

You'll redefine "badly", in fact. People will plug in their controllers while playing CS, and a message will pop up saying "Badly Mode Activated", because "badly" will have come to be defined as "playing CS with a controller".

A guy will make a dubstep remix of you playing CS with a controller, and it will get approximately 592 views and four comments. Oddly, most of those views will be from Connecticut, and the uploader will put an annotation in their video pointing out this fact after checking their view statistics, but he'll remove the annotation after a couple of days because he decided that this fact isn't very interesting.

Somebody will try, and fail, to create a meme involving your k/d ratio. It'll be called "Funny k/d ratio controller guy", and it'll be awful. It will go entirely unnoticed, and the creator will feel bad and go back to submitting images to The Cheezburger Network. His name is Timothy, and he's currently at a 7/11 trying to decide between Slim Jims and a bag of Combos.

EDIT: He'll go with the Slim Jims.

I only play objective based shooters to get a high k/d. How good would my k/d be?

77. That's imperial units, of course, which doesn't apply to k/ds (or make any amount of sense), but this is the topsy-turvy world of "playing CS with a controller", so anything goes. In this world, one could even play Marble Madness with a dance pad, or The Pat Boone Driving Simulator '92 with a hand-cranked calliope. Have you considered CS by way of calliope? It'll be grand.

#7 Posted by Terramagi (1159 posts) -

@FiestaUnicorn said:

@ShaggE said:

All of the badly.

You'll redefine "badly", in fact. People will plug in their controllers while playing CS, and a message will pop up saying "Badly Mode Activated", because "badly" will have come to be defined as "playing CS with a controller".

A guy will make a dubstep remix of you playing CS with a controller, and it will get approximately 592 views and four comments. Oddly, most of those views will be from Connecticut, and the uploader will put an annotation in their video pointing out this fact after checking their view statistics, but he'll remove the annotation after a couple of days because he decided that this fact isn't very interesting.

Somebody will try, and fail, to create a meme involving your k/d ratio. It'll be called "Funny k/d ratio controller guy", and it'll be awful. It will go entirely unnoticed, and the creator will feel bad and go back to submitting images to The Cheezburger Network. His name is Timothy, and he's currently at a 7/11 trying to decide between Slim Jims and a bag of Combos.

EDIT: He'll go with the Slim Jims.

I only play objective based shooters to get a high k/d. How good would my k/d be?

Let me put it this way:

Do you WANT there to be Ks?

Because if so, don't even look at a controller.

#8 Posted by Hilbert (347 posts) -

Quake arena on Xbox 360 with controller:

Quake 3 arena on PC with mouse and keyboard:

#9 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -
@ShaggE If I wasn't already married I would be proposing to you right now
#10 Posted by ShaggE (5981 posts) -

@Tim_the_Corsair said:

@ShaggE If I wasn't already married I would be proposing to you right now

I'd swoon, but I can't feel my legs. :( If I ever bump into you and your wife at a dance recital or discus championship, though, I'll treat everybody to froyos.

#11 Posted by FiestaUnicorn (1576 posts) -

@Hilbert said:

Quake arena on Xbox 360 with controller:

Quake 3 arena on PC with mouse and keyboard:

OMG!!!!1!!! You can play Quake 3 with a controller!!!! Now I can play it the same way I play Call Of Duty, which is a similar game!!!@ShaggE said:

@FiestaUnicorn said:

@ShaggE said:

All of the badly.

You'll redefine "badly", in fact. People will plug in their controllers while playing CS, and a message will pop up saying "Badly Mode Activated", because "badly" will have come to be defined as "playing CS with a controller".

A guy will make a dubstep remix of you playing CS with a controller, and it will get approximately 592 views and four comments. Oddly, most of those views will be from Connecticut, and the uploader will put an annotation in their video pointing out this fact after checking their view statistics, but he'll remove the annotation after a couple of days because he decided that this fact isn't very interesting.

Somebody will try, and fail, to create a meme involving your k/d ratio. It'll be called "Funny k/d ratio controller guy", and it'll be awful. It will go entirely unnoticed, and the creator will feel bad and go back to submitting images to The Cheezburger Network. His name is Timothy, and he's currently at a 7/11 trying to decide between Slim Jims and a bag of Combos.

EDIT: He'll go with the Slim Jims.

I only play objective based shooters to get a high k/d. How good would my k/d be?

77. That's imperial units, of course, which doesn't apply to k/ds (or make any amount of sense), but this is the topsy-turvy world of "playing CS with a controller", so anything goes. In this world, one could even play Marble Madness with a dance pad, or The Pat Boone Driving Simulator '92 with a hand-cranked calliope. Have you considered CS by way of calliope? It'll be grand.

Hilbert let me know that I can also play Quake 3 with a controller. Since the first time I played Quake 2 on the 360 I've wanted to play Quake 3 with a controller and now I can.

#12 Edited by Akyho (1549 posts) -

Oh dear god no. You would not be of any use playing with a controller.

I have been playing CS:GO alot on pc recently. I have a 4000DPI mouse that can be changed down to 0. I play CS:GO on my third level which is 3000DPI. I am smooth as butter and fast, if I felt confertable and if it would help, I would run at 3000DPI

I DLed the trial of CS:GO on xbox. I tried it, nope turn is slow, upped it, nope still slow....nope...maxed. That is absolutely damned slow, people were pulling headshots off on me. That was Controller vs Controller.

Controller vs Mouse, nope Mouse wins.

Also Xbox version to make up for the slowness. Right bumper is 180 turn.......thats right. To help the game speed up they added in a 180 turn function.

Just look.

PC

XBOX

#13 Posted by Terramagi (1159 posts) -

@Hilbert said:

Quake arena on Xbox 360 with controller:

Quake 3 arena on PC with mouse and keyboard:

This really reminds me of that Shadowrun FPS.

First game ever with crossplay.

Last game, after teams of console gamers routinely went without getting a single kill.

#14 Posted by ShaggE (5981 posts) -

@FiestaUnicorn said:

Hilbert let me know that I can also play Quake 3 with a controller. Since the first time I played Quake 2 on the 360 I've wanted to play Quake 3 with a controller and now I can.

Yeah, Hilbert's got people's backs like that. Hilly and I go way back. He used to copilot my biplane. We called it the Flyin' Biplane. I was never good at naming biplanes. Better at naming canoes.

#15 Posted by Akyho (1549 posts) -

@Te

This really reminds me of that Shadowrun FPS.

First game ever with crossplay.

Last game, after teams of console gamers routinely went without getting a single kill.

I played Shadowrun a tone on xbox. It wasnt the console mouse problem, it was the LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG.

Even when we played on a somewhat stable game with a PC person or 2. We did ok if not won.

However no one playing Shadowrun and playing console people crossplay, would be serious about the game. Not like CS players!

#16 Posted by FiestaUnicorn (1576 posts) -

@ShaggE said:

@FiestaUnicorn said:

Hilbert let me know that I can also play Quake 3 with a controller. Since the first time I played Quake 2 on the 360 I've wanted to play Quake 3 with a controller and now I can.

Yeah, Hilbert's got people's backs like that. Hilly and I go way back. He used to copilot my biplane. We called it the Flyin' Biplane. I was never good at naming biplanes. Better at naming canoes.

Shouldn't Jesus be your copilot. Perhaps he would give you the power to come up with good biplane names.

#17 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -

100% factual.

It is listed in the bible as one of his 16 different powers after he hits SSJ3, being a more powerful version of his "Rename Donkey" power he had previously

#18 Posted by ShaggE (5981 posts) -

@FiestaUnicorn said:

@ShaggE said:

@FiestaUnicorn said:

Hilbert let me know that I can also play Quake 3 with a controller. Since the first time I played Quake 2 on the 360 I've wanted to play Quake 3 with a controller and now I can.

Yeah, Hilbert's got people's backs like that. Hilly and I go way back. He used to copilot my biplane. We called it the Flyin' Biplane. I was never good at naming biplanes. Better at naming canoes.

Shouldn't Jesus be your copilot. Perhaps he would give you the power to come up with good biplane names.

I asked him, but all he could come up with was "The Spruce Goose"... sadly, that was already taken.

#19 Edited by UssjTrunks (534 posts) -

@FiestaUnicorn said:

If I were to play CS: GO on the PC with a controller how badly would I do?

You'd be pretty terrible.

Mouse + keyboard has an enormous advantage.

There was a study on this recently that I can't find the link to.

#20 Posted by Ubersmake (753 posts) -

You're already dead.

#21 Posted by Ravenlight (8033 posts) -

@Tim_the_Corsair said:

100% factual. It is listed in the bible as one of his 16 different powers after he hits SSJ3, being a more powerful version of his "Rename Donkey" power he had previously

I main Jesus. To be fair, Rename Donkey is hella OP and everybody just spams it. I'm pretty excited about the DLC though.

#22 Posted by believer258 (11039 posts) -

I tried playing the trial of CSGO on the Xbox and, speaking as a longtime console gamer who has played CSS with an M and K, the answer is "Counter Strike should never, ever be played with a controller."

Halo? Yep. Call of Duty? Perfect. Battlefield? Works fine. Team Fortress 2? Yeah, if they would update it. Counter Strike? Never. Doesn't work. Can't be done right.

#23 Posted by ElCount (69 posts) -

What if you try mouse and keyboard on the PS3? Would that be wrong when everybody else is using a controller?

#24 Posted by DoctorWelch (2774 posts) -

Eh, it depends how good your are at shooters with a controller. Yes, playing with a mouse and keyboard is going to be better when you are playing at some insanely high skill level, but in reality, you can actually get by with playing a controller. People are going to be all like "BLASPHEMY", but if you're used to playing with a controller you can still do well.

#25 Posted by Pie (6935 posts) -

I was watching a guy using a controller on the PC yesterday and he was doing all right.

Eh

#26 Posted by groin (822 posts) -

@Terramagi said:

@Hilbert said:

Quake arena on Xbox 360 with controller:

Quake 3 arena on PC with mouse and keyboard:

This really reminds me of that Shadowrun FPS.

First game ever with crossplay.

Last game, after teams of console gamers routinely went without getting a single kill.

Actually, PC players could connect to Quake 3 Dreamcast servers if they used the 1.16N version of the client way back in 2000.

#27 Posted by CaLe (3678 posts) -

I dunno how many times I've been getting shot in the back in CS only to quickly do a 180 and headshot the guy pestering me. I don't see how this can be done using a controller. Not with any consistency any way.

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