Crysis 2: If there was a machine for sucking & being terrible...

Posted by SpawnMan (748 posts) -

Then that machine certainly created Crysis 2. Let me list all the terrible things about this game - all in CAPS because it will infer I am angry and loud and that my point will be read as if being said in a loud angry, obnoxious tone of voice. And haters be hatin' but on my nerves they ain't grating... 
 
1) THE WRITING IS SO DAMN SMALL!!! IT'S LIKE DEAD RISING ALL OVER AGAIN!!! 
 
2) BORING, GENERIC FPS GAMEPLAY!!! 
 
3) OFTEN-TREADED, SIMPLE AND BORING STORYLINE!!! 
 
4) TERRIBLY SIMPLE AND RETARDED AI ENEMIES!!! 
 
5) TERRIBLE GUN HANDLING AND WEAPON PLAY!!! 
 
6) HORRIBLE LEVEL DESIGN!!! 
 
7) THE. MULTIPLAYER!!! 
 
So after about a month of trying to get into a game of Crysis 2 online multiplayer, I finally managed to get into one. Not the new recruits section, but the normal playlist because that was the only one with lobbies. 
 
What followed was probably the worst muliplayer experience of my life. Ever. I'll create you a log of my time - briefly edited so that it doesn't take up the entire blog entry... 
  

"Oh yes! Finally a game!! This is SOOO exciting!!!" REALLY LOUD INTRODUCTION MUSIC *Turns down music volume in settings* EXTRA LONG LOAD TIME 
 
*SPAWNS* "Wow, look at this vibrant beautiful world to explore! Let me explore the choke points, the sniping areas, the variations in terrain!" *DOESN'T FIND ANY* 
 
*DIES* "Ow! Haha, nevermind, I just began, I'll get the hang of this..." *SPAWNS* *DIES* "Wow, that was fast! I guess the guy WAS a level 48 and had waay better guns than me!
 
 *SPAWNS* *DIES* "Okay... Am I using a pea-shooter or something?? Does EVERYONE have a better gun than me and super abilities??
 
*SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* "F*CK YOU YOU F*CKING PIECE OF SH*T GAME!!! GEZUZ KRIST MOTHERF*CKER!!!! LET ME F*CKING LIVE MORE THAN 5 GADAMM SECONDS BEFORE KILLING ME!!!
 
*SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* 
  
*Gets a kill on another hapless noob who has wandered into the game. He promptly quits* 

*DEFEAT* 
 
 
This continues on for the next two hours. Each game I get about 3 kills. Now I bet you're thinking "Oh it's obvious this guy is just a retarded dumbass noob who can't play the game and that if something is too hard he just writes hate blogs about it on GiantBomb and now I'm going to go on about how much he sucks". This is not the case. 
 
I played the Crysis 2 multiplayer BETA. I got the top of the leaderboards a few times and always brought in around 8-12 kills every match. The BETA was good because the level cap was 5 (from memory - unless I'm mistake) and everyone had more or less the same weapons. However, now that the retail game is out and the multiplayer is so bad, only the hardcore fans are playing it. 
 
Therefore everyone is a higher level, has better equipment and the game is very inhospitable for it. It's just turned into a huge melee fest! Why EVEN HAVE GUNS FFS!!! With my entry level pea shooter assault rifle I was shooting these assh*les and they'd just walk up to me and whack me a couple of times. Even though they were in cloak and should've been blinded! I literally shot and shot and shot and melee'd and nothing happened.  
 
This would be annoying, but generally acceptable if one of two things happened - neither of which did. 1) You spawned with your team FFS!!!! It was MW2 all over again - my team would be in a group, I'd spawn far away, IN AMONGST LIKE 5 ENEMIES and then promptly die. This would happen all game. Or 2) You got experience for completing games! I won a game with my team and I got zero points?! I just got spawn killed and raped over and over and over and over and over and over and over for 10 minutes for nothing?? Just so I can see myself shooting the same level 40's and 50's and yet still dying over and over and over and over and over on my Death Cam???? Or if I get one kill I'm about 0.000000001% closer to getting any weapons or abilities that might be able to help me GET a kill against these tool up assh*les??  

So I got to level 5. I endured 3 hours of pain and frustration of people finding me while I was cloaked, while I could never see anyone. Or dying within 1 second of being shot, even with armour on. Or having a sniper rifle without any places to snipe without molestation on about 90% of the maps.  Or shooting someone in the head, them not dying, them turning around an killing me. Again and again and again and again. So after all that, I went and played Peggle. And I was happy. 
 
Moral of the story? F*ck Crysis 2.

#1 Posted by SpawnMan (748 posts) -

Then that machine certainly created Crysis 2. Let me list all the terrible things about this game - all in CAPS because it will infer I am angry and loud and that my point will be read as if being said in a loud angry, obnoxious tone of voice. And haters be hatin' but on my nerves they ain't grating... 
 
1) THE WRITING IS SO DAMN SMALL!!! IT'S LIKE DEAD RISING ALL OVER AGAIN!!! 
 
2) BORING, GENERIC FPS GAMEPLAY!!! 
 
3) OFTEN-TREADED, SIMPLE AND BORING STORYLINE!!! 
 
4) TERRIBLY SIMPLE AND RETARDED AI ENEMIES!!! 
 
5) TERRIBLE GUN HANDLING AND WEAPON PLAY!!! 
 
6) HORRIBLE LEVEL DESIGN!!! 
 
7) THE. MULTIPLAYER!!! 
 
So after about a month of trying to get into a game of Crysis 2 online multiplayer, I finally managed to get into one. Not the new recruits section, but the normal playlist because that was the only one with lobbies. 
 
What followed was probably the worst muliplayer experience of my life. Ever. I'll create you a log of my time - briefly edited so that it doesn't take up the entire blog entry... 
  

"Oh yes! Finally a game!! This is SOOO exciting!!!" REALLY LOUD INTRODUCTION MUSIC *Turns down music volume in settings* EXTRA LONG LOAD TIME 
 
*SPAWNS* "Wow, look at this vibrant beautiful world to explore! Let me explore the choke points, the sniping areas, the variations in terrain!" *DOESN'T FIND ANY* 
 
*DIES* "Ow! Haha, nevermind, I just began, I'll get the hang of this..." *SPAWNS* *DIES* "Wow, that was fast! I guess the guy WAS a level 48 and had waay better guns than me!
 
 *SPAWNS* *DIES* "Okay... Am I using a pea-shooter or something?? Does EVERYONE have a better gun than me and super abilities??
 
*SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* "F*CK YOU YOU F*CKING PIECE OF SH*T GAME!!! GEZUZ KRIST MOTHERF*CKER!!!! LET ME F*CKING LIVE MORE THAN 5 GADAMM SECONDS BEFORE KILLING ME!!!
 
*SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* *SPAWNS* *DIES* 
  
*Gets a kill on another hapless noob who has wandered into the game. He promptly quits* 

*DEFEAT* 
 
 
This continues on for the next two hours. Each game I get about 3 kills. Now I bet you're thinking "Oh it's obvious this guy is just a retarded dumbass noob who can't play the game and that if something is too hard he just writes hate blogs about it on GiantBomb and now I'm going to go on about how much he sucks". This is not the case. 
 
I played the Crysis 2 multiplayer BETA. I got the top of the leaderboards a few times and always brought in around 8-12 kills every match. The BETA was good because the level cap was 5 (from memory - unless I'm mistake) and everyone had more or less the same weapons. However, now that the retail game is out and the multiplayer is so bad, only the hardcore fans are playing it. 
 
Therefore everyone is a higher level, has better equipment and the game is very inhospitable for it. It's just turned into a huge melee fest! Why EVEN HAVE GUNS FFS!!! With my entry level pea shooter assault rifle I was shooting these assh*les and they'd just walk up to me and whack me a couple of times. Even though they were in cloak and should've been blinded! I literally shot and shot and shot and melee'd and nothing happened.  
 
This would be annoying, but generally acceptable if one of two things happened - neither of which did. 1) You spawned with your team FFS!!!! It was MW2 all over again - my team would be in a group, I'd spawn far away, IN AMONGST LIKE 5 ENEMIES and then promptly die. This would happen all game. Or 2) You got experience for completing games! I won a game with my team and I got zero points?! I just got spawn killed and raped over and over and over and over and over and over and over for 10 minutes for nothing?? Just so I can see myself shooting the same level 40's and 50's and yet still dying over and over and over and over and over on my Death Cam???? Or if I get one kill I'm about 0.000000001% closer to getting any weapons or abilities that might be able to help me GET a kill against these tool up assh*les??  

So I got to level 5. I endured 3 hours of pain and frustration of people finding me while I was cloaked, while I could never see anyone. Or dying within 1 second of being shot, even with armour on. Or having a sniper rifle without any places to snipe without molestation on about 90% of the maps.  Or shooting someone in the head, them not dying, them turning around an killing me. Again and again and again and again. So after all that, I went and played Peggle. And I was happy. 
 
Moral of the story? F*ck Crysis 2.

#2 Edited by CandiBunni (465 posts) -

Could you please list the exact reasons for all of those numbered complaints, instead of just listening them without any explanation as to why you think those things? 

#3 Posted by BaconGames (3371 posts) -

It's like each word is a piece of buckshot in the shotgun blast that is this post. Jesus man if your goal was to be avoid subtlety you sure as hell succeeded.

#4 Posted by afrofools (1341 posts) -

The hardcore gamers ruin multiplayer for all the core and casual gamers out there. It's the way it is in every game, some games just have more hardcore communities than others or pair skill levels worse. That's why I like Battlefield, because save for a few maps, both skill sets can have a good time when they are put together. Just a shame the hardcore groups team up. I know that every time I manage to get on a good team I try and play as long as possible because most of the time I end up with other people who also can't compete (or are significantly worse than me). That's how it is in every game.

#5 Posted by ShaggE (6420 posts) -

But how do you feel about Crysis 2?

#6 Posted by coakroach (2490 posts) -
 Its okay man I got you
#7 Posted by BeachThunder (11834 posts) -
#8 Posted by Vitor (2815 posts) -
#9 Posted by NTM (7338 posts) -

The only thing I actually liked about the game was the music. The only thing I liked about the first Crysis (and Warhead (other than its length)) was well, everything. Yeah, Crysis 2 was disappointing.

#10 Posted by valrog (3671 posts) -

I found the story quite... refreshing? Then again, I don't play that many sci-fi games.
 
@NTM said:

The only thing I actually liked about the game was the music. The only thing I liked about the first Crysis (and Warhead (other than its length)) was well, everything. Yeah, Crysis 2 was disappointing.
Yeah, the music was great. Way better than in the first and Warhead.
#11 Posted by Slither_Maggot (223 posts) -
@valrog: Like... story was refreshing? Or in your opinion was the game as a whole refreshing? I haven't played either game but with all the hype over it I thought about giving it a shot and since you said you don't play many sci-fi games I figured a fresh perspective would be nice.
#12 Posted by DEMONOLOGY_24 (521 posts) -

OH EXCUSE ME BUT YOU LEFT YOUR CAPS LOCK ON

#13 Edited by salad10203 (654 posts) -

I could forgive all its flaws if the gun didn't take up half the screen(fov?).  I don't know what it is, but every game that does that makes it unplayable for me.  

#14 Posted by valrog (3671 posts) -
@Slither_Maggot said:
@valrog: Like... story was refreshing? Or in your opinion was the game as a whole refreshing? I haven't played either game but with all the hype over it I thought about giving it a shot and since you said you don't play many sci-fi games I figured a fresh perspective would be nice.
I found the story actually quite good. Well, when you find out what's actually happening. The plot around the Nanosuit is well thought out (The story around Aliens could be a lot better), and considering the story in the first game was practically nonexistent (Go to island to see what Koreans are up to - Aliens awake - shit gets real) it was a refreshing change.
 
About the game as a whole, I quite enjoyed it. It had its flaws, but nothing game breaking. Bosses could use more diversity and Stealth could be made better, but overall it's an amazing experience. The setting is great, and beautiful graphics just make your jaw drop. I definitely recommend it if you can get it somewhere on a sale.
#15 Posted by dragonzord (811 posts) -

I also think Crysis 2 is a very bad game, OP

#16 Posted by SpawnMan (748 posts) -
@Tuffgong said:

It's like each word is a piece of buckshot in the shotgun blast that is this post. Jesus man if your goal was to be avoid subtlety you sure as hell succeeded.

CLASSIC! 
 
@NTM said:
The only thing I actually liked about the game was the music. The only thing I liked about the first Crysis (and Warhead (other than its length)) was well, everything. Yeah, Crysis 2 was disappointing.
The music? Seriously? Before each game it would blast about 1000000000000 decibels and then for the entire game it'd be repetitive and annoying. Music < Enjoyable. 
 
@salad10203 said:
I could forgive all its flaws if the gun didn't take up half the screen(fov?).  I don't know what it is, but every game that does that makes it unplayable for me.  
Amen to this! The enemies are so damn small and it's impossible to hit the with the friggin screen filling iron sights!! 
 
@CandiBunni said:
Could you please list the exact reasons for all of those numbered complaints, instead of just listening them without any explanation as to why you think those things? 
 Done: 
 
1) The writing is small. Umm.... Because it is? Go into your multiplayer stats and try and read everything. Small. Damn small. Exactly like when Otis tries to call you in Dead Rising. And I'm on a widescreen.
 
2) Boring generic gameplay? Go through this level, shoot these guys - don't know why but they're after you and oh, of course they don't understand you because you're a badass guy with a suit, which frankly is the only slightly different aspect of the game, but isn't enough to pull the crash wreck that is Crysis 2 through. 
 
3) Storyline was trash. It even makes CoD look new and original!  As per above, the whole opening parts of the game is exactly like every other game where you are a suspect and you must fight through the marines to get uncover the truth. And the aliens? Weaaakk storyline. 
 
4) The AI is terrible. They wander about, sit there and shoot you from cover or the open or where ever. Don't bother to run around and flank or whatever, even if you've killed the same guys over and over from the same position. It's only challenging at parts because there seems to be an infinite wave of marines and aliens and their firepower is very damaging. Otherwise, they might as well be sentry guns or cardboard cut-outs with guns. No, that'd be an insult to cardboard cut-outs. 
 
5) The gun takes up most of the screen, the weapons are boring and mundane, the enemies are small within the sights so basically the whole game is just terrible. Not wonder no one uses guns in multiplayer! All they do is go around meleeing people because the guns are trash. 
 
6) Obvious pathways with little deviation. The graphics are great, so that makes it worse. Games like Halo and CoD have defined pathways most of the time, but they aren't spouting off about how beautiful they are and you'd think a game with such great graphics would at least TRY to vary up the cityscape to allow for more paths to take. And don't even get me started on multiplayer mapping. Every spot can be reached within a couple of seconds, so there's no sniping and all you do is spawn and die over and over. 
 
7) The multiplayer has been discussed
#17 Posted by Cloudenvy (5891 posts) -

I don't like how you structure your posts D:

#18 Posted by Shadow (4979 posts) -

I could form a structured argument for all those statements, but for the sake of time,

#19 Posted by Vinny_Says (5700 posts) -
#20 Posted by MayorFeedback (674 posts) -

I got to "Let me list all the terrible things about this-" and then I fell asleep.

#21 Posted by Captain_Felafel (1568 posts) -

@blacklabeldomm said:

@BeachThunder said:
Ugh, ALL CAPS.
It's sounds like you're having a
The thread, forum, website and the whole damn internet is over. Pack it in people.

Bravo, good job and well done sir. Also, shame on you.

#22 Posted by SpawnMan (748 posts) -
@drhans said:

I got to "Let me list all the terrible things about this-" and then I fell asleep.

I got to "I got to" and then I killed a kitten.
#23 Posted by left4doof (286 posts) -

When the AI was worked it was great . The biggest problem  I have with crysis 2 is the multiplayer don't know why it just wasn't all that fun aside from that I liked it alot

#24 Posted by mfpantst (2574 posts) -

SUCH A GREAT THREAD

#25 Posted by UlquioKani (1045 posts) -

I liked Crysis 2, it was good for what it was. Didn't encounter any of the problems you had, maybe my standards are lower

#26 Posted by Raineko (433 posts) -

I think the game was awesome. For a fps it had more variety than most shooters since you had the suit abilities and had different options to approach a situation.
I also liked that you could scan and tag the environment and see weapons, ammo and enemies through walls. The AI wasn't amazing but I didn't notice anything too annoying.
The story wasn't that special either but I found the ending pretty cool.
 
And about the multiplayer: I think it's it can be pretty harsh for newcomers but it's not unplayable. Today I played the mp a bit and owned with the standard shotgun. You just have to look at the minimap because that mostly shows where the enemies are.

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