Favorite Funny Quotes from Dragon Age

#1 Posted by Psychotron (10 posts) -

When I started to play this game, I thought it was just going to be another one of those really corny, medieval fantasy games. And it was until I heard some of the funniest quotes I've ever heard from a video game character. This game is chock full of hysterical and amazing quotes, post your favorites here! 
 And I'm very new to this site and these forums, so I apologize in advance if there's already one of these topics. 
One of my favorites is when Alistair asks you about Morrigan and you ask him if he likes her and he says "Well, other than the fact that she's a complete and utter bitch... no I don't like her at all..." It caught me off guard, and I laughed a lot.

#2 Posted by endaround (2243 posts) -

There was a thread here before.  That said the best ones tend to be Alister and Morrigan quipping, Zevran hitting on Wynne, Wynne and Ohgren talking about alcohol,  Shale and Leliana talking about shoes, and Morrigan hitting on Sten.

#3 Posted by Andheez (621 posts) -

I thought it was hilarious when I went to the whore house and chose surprise me..... if you haven't done it, give it a go, its pretty funny.

#4 Posted by FLStyle (5696 posts) -

Upon finding the Urn:
Wynne: "This is a great honour. I will treasure this moment forever." 
Sten: "Congratulations, you have found a waste-bin."

#5 Posted by Fallen189 (5329 posts) -

I'm playing it again at the moment, and I hit lothering, There's a great bit where you're dealing with a vendor, and he talks about "Making a killing" recently, and one of the replies can be "I'm about to make one too!!(Kill Him)"
Which really made me laugh.

#6 Posted by thebatmobile (991 posts) -

When you find Sandal in room filled with dead Darkspawn and him covered in blood and all he says is "Enchantment!"

#7 Posted by Chronologist (291 posts) -

The Leliana - Morrigan one about shopping was pretty funny.
Can't remember any more else right now...

#8 Posted by OldGuy (1609 posts) -

Leliana - Sten, I saw you back there.
Sten - I don't know what you're talking about.
Leliana - I saw you playing with that kitten!
Sten - There was no... I was not.
Leliana - You were too! You were dangling a piece of yarn for it!
Sten - I was... training it.
Leliana - Heh, who knew? Under all that stern gruffness you're really just a big softie!
Sten - We shall never speak of this again.
Leliana - Softie!
Sten - *sigh*
Dog - (Dog peers up at Sten, tail wagging)
Sten - We don't have time for this now.
Dog - (Dog continues peering, a little more determined)
Sten - No, absolutely not.
Dog - (Whines)
Sten - There is no time. We have work to do.
Dog - (Whines)
Sten - (Sigh) ... Fine. Bring me the stick. But this is the last time, I swear it.
Dog - (Happy Bark!)

#9 Posted by PenguinDust (12844 posts) -
@Chronologist said:
" The Leliana - Morrigan one about shopping was pretty funny.Can't remember any more else right now... "
This is what I was going to say, too.  "oh and we'll get you some shoes!"   That is something I would have actually loved to have seen in the game.  The two of them take off for a bit and when they come back there is new clothes in the backpack.  A montage cut-scene of them shopping would play while they were off.
#10 Posted by armaan8014 (5864 posts) -


  • Sten: Snarls.
  • Dog:Growls angrily.
  • Sten:Lets out a terrifying roar.
  • Dog: Barks angrily and lunges at Sten.
  • Sten: "You are a true warrior, and worthy of respect."
  • Dog: Barks excitedly.
#11 Posted by armaan8014 (5864 posts) -


  • Morrigan: "I know it was you rooting in my pack, mongrel."
  • Dog: Innocent whine
  • Morrigan: "Who else? Alistair? He's a likely suspect, I admit, but no."
  • Dog: Bows head shamefully
  • Morrigan: "I notice you avoided the hemlock."
  • Dog: Happy bark!
  • Morrigan: "Yes, yes, very clever. Next time I will disguise it more carefully."
  • Dog: Sad eyes
  • Morrigan: "Do not even try it! I would not give you a biscuit had I one."
  • Dog: Sadder eyes
  • Morrigan: "Oh... very well. But tell no one!"
#12 Edited by SmithSyndicate (101 posts) -

>Asking Zevran if he's interested in going through The Joining
Zevran: Me?  No.  There are some bodily fluids that not even I will touch.
 Wynne: Why do I have to be called 'Elder Mage'?  I know I'm getting past my prime, but still...
Shale: Would you rather I called you 'Older Mage But Don't Mind My Sagging Bits?'
>Arriving at the Haven
Zevran:  "Ah, quiet insular communities. There's always something nasty going on behind closed doors. I hope it involves chains. I hope they ask me to join in."
>Zevran offers to stick his hand in the Hermit's stump home
Zevran:  "Ha! Let's see... When was the last time I slipped my hand into some dark hole? Hmmm... Long story, that."
Of course, all these are from memory so they're not exact.

#13 Edited by laussica (187 posts) -

too lazy to type it vid explains

#14 Posted by Yummylee (23512 posts) -

The Orzammar announcer outside Harrowmonts estate. ''News of the hour: Prince Bhelen attacks assembly and is inconveniently  slain. Epic Fail''
#15 Posted by RedneckedCrake (321 posts) -

When Logain goes "Excuse me if I close my eyes and think of my dead wife." 
I'm sure most people know what I'm talking about.

#16 Posted by smudo (158 posts) -

"Willy toiled for many a year to perfect the curious mechanisms that would send a sharpened spike up the arse of the unwary intruder."

#17 Posted by Vaile (386 posts) -

"Pantaloons, excellent! One can never have too many pairs of pantaloons!"

#18 Posted by Liam_mk (300 posts) -
@thebatmobile said:
" When you find Sandal in room filled with dead Darkspawn and him covered in blood and all he says is "Enchantment!" "
This was the BEST point in the game
#19 Posted by Buscemi (1125 posts) -

I've always found the conversations between Morrigan and Alistair intriguing. Yes, intriguing.

#20 Posted by Vaile (386 posts) -

New favorite: 
The Warden, while seducing Morrigan: "Get in the tent, woman."

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