Why GiantBomb should stay away from E3

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#1 Posted by Ashenn (47 posts) -

All the information you need is here.


As you can see it such a scary world of depravity that we should save the wonderful team from having to endure it.

You can tell that this  article knows what its talking about because of the chart, and i just wanted people to know the real E3.



(:P)
#2 Posted by ch13696 (4582 posts) -

Yes... yes. Those half-naked chics will most certainly turn my kids gay.

#3 Posted by ssj4raditz (1125 posts) -

#4 Posted by Yanngc33 (4496 posts) -

Oh my well by golly I will cancel my subscription at this website and join the Lord's websites.


Also did you check out the author?

Alex K. Keating is a political intern currently working for the Republican party in Washington. His likes include Fox News, Sarah Palin, and exposing Communism. 


#5 Edited by GetEveryone (4455 posts) -

SURELY, that site is a piss-take?

I had a quick flick through one or two articles, and it's just brimming with irony.

Awful stuff, either way.

Edit: Couldn't actually click on the E3 link, after seeing that, it's patently obvious.
#6 Posted by PenguinDust (12532 posts) -

Ha-ha, that was pretty funny.  I think more games need "homogay sodomy" in them to hold my depraved attention.  Goodness knows when I'm not randomly raping booth babes, I'm raping random street utilities.  If only there was more homogay sodomy in games to keep me away from all that raping.  

#7 Posted by Jothel (930 posts) -

i think the rape chart pretty much confirms that it cannot be real

#8 Posted by Generiko (445 posts) -
@Yanngc33 said:
" Oh my well by golly I will cancel my subscription at this website and join the Lord's websites.

Also did you check out the author?

Alex K. Keating is a political intern currently working for the Republican party in Washington. His likes include Fox News, Sarah Palin, and exposing Communism. 


"
What is wrong with the author? He sounds like a good ,straight, young man who hates terrorists.
#9 Posted by MysteriousBob (6272 posts) -
@ch13696 said:
" Yes... yes. Those half-naked chics will most certainly turn my kids gay. "
Haven't you seen that latest study by Fox? Being interested in women is a sure sign of being gay!
#10 Posted by The_Grindilow (431 posts) -

'even the building e3 takes place in looks like a large stubby penis'

Awesome, may make this site my homepage

#11 Posted by Random88 (284 posts) -

I Laughed when I saw the "Un-reported" Rape chart.  If it was unreported how can you chart the data.  Also "Man-Fire Hydrant"

#12 Edited by Vexxan (4622 posts) -

Among the most stupid articles I've ever read.

#13 Posted by Lemoncookie01 (1667 posts) -

Man on fire hydrant made me laugh

#14 Posted by wealllikepie (757 posts) -

MAN-FIRE HYDRANT
OH SHIT THE END OF THE WORLD IS UPON US!!!!

#15 Posted by Yanngc33 (4496 posts) -
@Generiko said:
" @Yanngc33 said:
" Oh my well by golly I will cancel my subscription at this website and join the Lord's websites.

Also did you check out the author?

Alex K. Keating is a political intern currently working for the Republican party in Washington. His likes include Fox News, Sarah Palin, and exposing Communism. 


"
What is wrong with the author? He sounds like a good ,straight, young man who hates terrorists. "
He is an american hero good sir
#16 Posted by kelbear (496 posts) -
#17 Posted by Random88 (284 posts) -

I think this whole site is a joke.  Look at the related articles

#18 Edited by ch13696 (4582 posts) -
@MysteriousBob said:

" @ch13696 said:

" Yes... yes. Those half-naked chics will most certainly turn my kids gay. "
Haven't you seen that latest study by Fox? Being interested in women is a sure sign of being gay! "
Link, or it's f... who am I kidding? It's FOX.

EDIT: This explains a lot...



#19 Posted by ch13696 (4582 posts) -
@Lemoncookie01 said:
" Man on fire hydrant made me laugh

"
That one instance must've been that one time that the cops caught me man-handling myself next to the fire hydrant.
#20 Posted by natetodamax (19208 posts) -

Joke website

#21 Posted by MysteriousBob (6272 posts) -
@ch13696 said:
" @MysteriousBob said:

" @ch13696 said:

" Yes... yes. Those half-naked chics will most certainly turn my kids gay. "
Haven't you seen that latest study by Fox? Being interested in women is a sure sign of being gay! "
Link, or it's f... who am I kidding? It's FOX.

EDIT: This explains a lot...



"
Dude, its a satirical site. As was my comment. I'm British, I've never seen Fox News in my life outside of Charlie Brooker videos.
#22 Posted by MikkaQ (10294 posts) -

Stay away from downtown during E3. It could get... smoggy!




#23 Posted by ajamafalous (12007 posts) -

He could've trolled a lot more people by making the satire less obvious.

#24 Posted by Gamer_152 (14080 posts) -

Just so everyone's clear on this ChristWire is a joke website and a damn good one, that article really made me laugh.

Moderator
#25 Posted by Underachiever007 (2468 posts) -
#26 Posted by SeriouslyNow (8534 posts) -

May 1, 2011
5:13 am

Women shouldn’t talk about football. You should stick to your homogay feminist agenda and leave the football talk to the men.


 This is the who supposedly wrote that article responding to a commenter.  He is supposedly a Republican US Senator.
#27 Posted by innacces14 (735 posts) -
#28 Posted by Ashenn (47 posts) -

I thought this would raise some smiles across the GiantBomb community, reading some of the other articles makes me laugh so hard especially being from England and their massive prejudice against us. 

#29 Posted by Dany (7887 posts) -

you know, reporting news from a joke website leads to third of the comments thinking its real, a third speculating its fake and a third knowing its fake or actually using google to check it out

#30 Posted by ShaggE (6472 posts) -

Christwire is hilarious. I love that they're about 800% (yes, I *can* beat 100%, Mr. Gerstmann!) more blatant than The Onion, yet the word "christ" makes it seem legitimate in so many people's eyes. 

#31 Edited by mpgeist (612 posts) -

There's no way that can be real.  Then again, I remember trolling a Flat Earth Society website that was completely serious.

#32 Posted by leebmx (2245 posts) -

Loving the angry posts underneath from people who think this is real.

#33 Posted by opp (39 posts) -

Dude thank you so much for showing me that website. I laughed so hard reading that article.
#34 Posted by Trebz (487 posts) -

I knew this had to be satire or the work of someone suffering from serious paranoia.


The fact that all comments that are in on the joke got rated down and all the angry comments were rated up is kind of sad and kind of funny.
#35 Posted by Red (5995 posts) -

I like how it isn't just gay, it's homogay.

#36 Posted by Subjugation (4722 posts) -

I laughed so much.

#37 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@Ashenn said:
" All the information you need is here.

As you can see it such a scary world of depravity that we should save the wonderful team from having to endure it.

You can tell that this  article knows what its talking about because of the chart, and i just wanted people to know the real E3.



(:P)
"
You do know its a fake Christan website right? 
#38 Posted by MariachiMacabre (7096 posts) -

This reminds me a lot of that Landover Baptist Church forum, in that they both seem to be fake. Oh man, the Landover forums was hilarious. Especially the one about Fallout 3. Good times.

#39 Posted by Aaron_G (1615 posts) -

It's about time someone disclosed the "actual" events that take place at E3. 

#40 Posted by craigbo180 (1739 posts) -
@Yanngc33 said:
" Oh my well by golly I will cancel my subscription at this website and join the Lord's websites.

Also did you check out the author?

Alex K. Keating is a political intern currently working for the Republican party in Washington. His likes include Fox News, Sarah Palin, and exposing Communism. 


"
That's the same interests that I have.
#41 Posted by TorMasturba (1094 posts) -

Absolutely hilarious from start to finish, the question is: Is this site pro-Christain or faux-Christain? ha ha.

#42 Posted by OllyOxenFree (4974 posts) -

Hey guys I think this is a joke website lololololololol.

#43 Posted by NegativeCero (3005 posts) -

Okay, good. I honestly couldn't tell whether it was a joke judging from the article. Although the man-fire hydrant rape had me leaning towards fake. I'd like to see the crazy pro-Christian website that it is parodying.

#44 Posted by CornBREDX (5347 posts) -

I have a hard time believing this site is for real... but then again there are weird people out there.

No matter what people believe though, it's pretty irresponsible what some people are doing on this site. If you don't agree, don't go there. Of course you do have the right to discuss that with them, but the terms "nazi" and other words being used on the comments for their post to describe your distaste for their "belief" (as odd a belief as it appears to be- and hard to believe) is a tad much.

I don't defend their belief at all, but at the same time people need to not be hypocrites themselves. The fact of the matter is, as long as they aren't hurting anyone (which they aren't, they're just spreading strange lies) then they can say what they want. No one has the right to condemn them for believing in such hateful things. If they are for real, from their perspective what you and I believe is strange and offensive as well.

I completely find everything they say idiotic, but at the same time I believe they have the right to believe what they want (even if it seems extremely odd and medieval in a way- again really hard to believe this is real). I think it would be more responsible to not give them any attention.

Just my opinion though.

#45 Posted by ryanwho (12082 posts) -

The best part of christwire are the dumbasses who don't see that its obvious satire.

#46 Edited by Underachiever007 (2468 posts) -
@CornBREDX said:

" I have a hard time believing this site is for real... but then again there are weird people out there.No matter what people believe though, it's pretty irresponsible what some people are doing on this site. If you don't agree, don't go there. Of course you do have the right to discuss that with them, but the terms "nazi" and other words being used on the comments for their post to describe your distaste for their "belief" (as odd a belief as it appears to be- and hard to believe) is a tad much.I don't defend their belief at all, but at the same time people need to not be hypocrites themselves. The fact of the matter is, as long as they aren't hurting anyone (which they aren't, they're just spreading strange lies) then they can say what they want. No one has the right to condemn them for believing in such hateful things. If they are for real, from their perspective what you and I believe is strange and offensive as well.I completely find everything they say idiotic, but at the same time I believe they have the right to believe what they want (even if it seems extremely odd and medieval in a way- again really hard to believe this is real). I think it would be more responsible to not give them any attention.Just my opinion though. "

It is a satirical site.
#47 Posted by PopUp (39 posts) -

Why is everyone taking this seriously?

#48 Posted by DonutFever (3551 posts) -
@Underachiever007 said:
" @CornBREDX said:

" I have a hard time believing this site is for real... but then again there are weird people out there.No matter what people believe though, it's pretty irresponsible what some people are doing on this site. If you don't agree, don't go there. Of course you do have the right to discuss that with them, but the terms "nazi" and other words being used on the comments for their post to describe your distaste for their "belief" (as odd a belief as it appears to be- and hard to believe) is a tad much.I don't defend their belief at all, but at the same time people need to not be hypocrites themselves. The fact of the matter is, as long as they aren't hurting anyone (which they aren't, they're just spreading strange lies) then they can say what they want. No one has the right to condemn them for believing in such hateful things. If they are for real, from their perspective what you and I believe is strange and offensive as well.I completely find everything they say idiotic, but at the same time I believe they have the right to believe what they want (even if it seems extremely odd and medieval in a way- again really hard to believe this is real). I think it would be more responsible to not give them any attention.Just my opinion though. "

It is a satirical site. "
 

Who woulda thunk it?
#49 Posted by CornBREDX (5347 posts) -
@Underachiever007: Ya I saw that after I posted... my comments still stand though. People shouldn't make comments about stuff they don't agree with in the fashion you see in those comments.

You shouldn't fight hate with hate; at least that's what I think.

Anyway, ya that was funny in that odd- "im not sure this is for real"- way. While "homogay" is funny (once) they use it too often. But im not here to critique their writing. =P

Thanks though for spreading the word of the satire. You know what they say, if you don't get the satire the jokes on you.  =)
#50 Posted by Azteck (7449 posts) -
 
Won't somebody please think of the children?!

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