ZP: Yahtzee reviews Final Fantasy XIII. 5 whole hours of it.

#1 Posted by uniform (1835 posts) -

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/1569-Final-Fantasy-XIII
 
Not his best work, but it's the first I've watched his review of a game I'm currently playing at the time of the review, so it got a few chuckles out of me.

#2 Posted by OmegaPirate (5523 posts) -

Well thats certainly more than he plays of most games...

#3 Posted by ZenaxPure (2569 posts) -
@OmegaPirate said:
" Well thats certainly more than he plays of most games... "
Oh snap. 
 
Anyway, for the first time in I think ever he seemed light on humor and more serious and some of his points (you know, those not flicked away by factual evidence) I actually agree with early on. Though I have numerous questions and complaints I actually liked that episode.
#4 Posted by FirePrince (1763 posts) -

Ah yes,Yahtzee never dissapoints.
#5 Edited by Lawrens (688 posts) -

I don't really find the guy funny, but still a good watch nonetheless, and I agree with a lot of his points, except I actually enjoy the tedious parts of the game at the beginning, for the cutscenes at least, and when the combat was still fresh to me while it opens up, even though it opens up very freaking slowly.

Edit: Though I'd love to see him do another review after he play 40 more hours of it and see if it really does get "better" for him =P 

#6 Posted by ThatFrood (3375 posts) -
Link
 
I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others.
And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old.
#7 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game...
#8 Posted by ryanwho (12082 posts) -

He addresses the whole "but guys it gets great 20 hours in" copout response, before anyone thinks of whipping that out.

#9 Posted by Hailinel (24381 posts) -
@ryanwho said:
" He addresses the whole "but guys it gets great 20 hours in" copout response, before anyone thinks of whipping that out. "
Except I found that the game was great much earlier in.
 
Like, from the start.
#10 Posted by Asurastrike (2166 posts) -

I'm 8 hours into Final Fantasy XIII and I don't know if I will ever return to it. I don't care if it gets good at 20 hours, that's another half a day wasted playing the boring parts.

#11 Posted by ApertureSilence (1156 posts) -
@The_Laughing_Man said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game... "
That's not what "critic" means, it's not even what being "critical" means. Analyzing something critically is NOT about finding fault, but merely a detailed evaluation - positive or negative.
#12 Posted by Mcfart (1605 posts) -
@ryanwho said:
" He addresses the whole "but guys it gets great 20 hours in" copout response, before anyone thinks of whipping that out. "
Yup, his reasoning is that you "adapt" to the awfulness.
#13 Posted by ryanwho (12082 posts) -

There are games you could be playing where you don't have to make excuses for them every 5 minutes. That's all I'm saying, before people start flipping out over a satirist's experience with the game.

#14 Posted by Nictel (2403 posts) -

His view on the first few hours was pretty accurate. Though he should have obviously played the ps3 version, for the cutscenes that is.

#15 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@MurderByDeath said:
" @The_Laughing_Man said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game... "
That's not what "critic" means, it's not even what being "critical" means. Analyzing something critically is NOT about finding fault, but merely a detailed evaluation - positive or negative. "
If you watch his videos then you would get the joke.
#16 Posted by ApertureSilence (1156 posts) -
@The_Laughing_Man said:

" @MurderByDeath said:

" @The_Laughing_Man said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game... "
That's not what "critic" means, it's not even what being "critical" means. Analyzing something critically is NOT about finding fault, but merely a detailed evaluation - positive or negative. "
If you watch his videos then you would get the joke. "
 Just because Yahtzee said it doesn't make it right (or funny). In fact, all it does is perpetuate a common, and extremely irritating, misapprehension.    
#17 Posted by Symphony (1912 posts) -
@ryanwho said:
" There are games you could be playing where you don't have to make excuses for them every 5 minutes. That's all I'm saying, before people start flipping out over a satirist's experience with the game. "
This but at the same time there are plenty of people who will enjoy it from the start and don't need to use a copout "it gets good after 20 hours" excuse. I consider myself one of those people. *shrugs* Different strokes for different folks and to those who don't enjoy the pace of the early game I say move on to greener pastures.  
 
As always I enjoyed Yahtzee's review, he raised lots of valid points... though the footsteps one was odd. o.O
#18 Posted by ryanwho (12082 posts) -
@Symphony said:
" @ryanwho said:
" There are games you could be playing where you don't have to make excuses for them every 5 minutes. That's all I'm saying, before people start flipping out over a satirist's experience with the game. "
This but at the same time there are plenty of people who will enjoy it from the start and don't need to use a copout "it gets good after 20 hours" excuse. I consider myself one of those people. *shrugs* Different strokes for different folks and to those who don't enjoy the pace of the early game I say move on to greener pastures.   As always I enjoyed Yahtzee's review, he raised lots of valid points... though the footsteps one was odd. o.O "
I did. Resonance of Fate was a great pallet cleanser. Its still fun to watch people skewer the game, though.
#19 Posted by Bones8677 (3225 posts) -

I'm kind of conflicted with this video. I was certain without a doubt that he would not review Final Fantasy 13, because of his strong distaste for JRPGs. I was expecting God of War 3. 
 
And considering he made no attempt to actually get into the game because he knew he wouldn't be going through it all. It kinda renders the idea of a review pointless. He had valid criticisms, I have no problems with the video at all, just wondering why even do one if you weren't going to give the game, the benefit of the doubt from the very beginning. 
 
"Because the fans wanted it." Has to be the only explanation.

#20 Posted by Nictel (2403 posts) -
@Symphony said:
" @ryanwho said:
" There are games you could be playing where you don't have to make excuses for them every 5 minutes. That's all I'm saying, before people start flipping out over a satirist's experience with the game. "
This but at the same time there are plenty of people who will enjoy it from the start and don't need to use a copout "it gets good after 20 hours" excuse. I consider myself one of those people. *shrugs* Different strokes for different folks and to those who don't enjoy the pace of the early game I say move on to greener pastures.   As always I enjoyed Yahtzee's review, he raised lots of valid points... though the footsteps one was odd. o.O "
 The loud deafening noise of footsteps on metal? Yeah. I was happy when they reached a non-metal surface. I tried not to notice it and blend it out. I can imagine that if you concentrate on it, it would get annoying fast.
#21 Edited by Livingitlarge22 (56 posts) -

I love Yahtzee's work and watch it every week, but just like any review you have to take it with a grain of salt and let your own experience dictate how you feel about the game. Everyone plays games for different reasons and with a different attitude. Some will love a game that can be compared to an excel spreadsheet (Final Fantasy) while as others may be into a game that is twitchy gunfest (Modern Warfare) or maybe some sort of mixture (Mass Effect/Bioshock)

#22 Posted by emkeighcameron (1876 posts) -

The last one I watched was his BC2 review which was pathetic because he didn't talk about the multiplayer at all (ITS A GODDAMN BATTLEFIELD GAME, COME ON).
 
That being said, I find his reviews funny if I know nothing about the game he's reviewing, like FF 13 here. If I actually know the game, I recognize that he's full of shit and he ceases to be funny.

#23 Posted by pwnasaurus (1286 posts) -

its how i feel about the game and you know what hes right the game is bad its corridors guys that look like girls and its everything i hate about the world yatzee sums it up great.
#24 Posted by Mcfart (1605 posts) -
@MurderByDeath said:
" @The_Laughing_Man said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game... "
That's not what "critic" means, it's not even what being "critical" means. Analyzing something critically is NOT about finding fault, but merely a detailed evaluation - positive or negative. "
True. Although I find his FFXIII video funny and accurate, most of the other videos are trying too hard to fault good games (Heavy Rain, MW2, Bad Company 2).
#25 Posted by ApertureSilence (1156 posts) -
@Bones8677 said:
"And considering he made no attempt to actually get into the game because he knew he wouldn't be going through it all. It kinda renders the idea of a review pointless. He had valid criticisms, I have no problems with the video at all, just wondering why even do one if you weren't going to give the game, the benefit of the doubt from the very beginning.
It sounded to me like he was absolutely trying to approach it with an open mind and give it the benefit of the doubt, but that goodwill was very quickly crushed under a plethora of bad game design choices.
#26 Posted by WilliamRLBaker (4777 posts) -

He seems to have touched the same vein all the other reviewers for the game...*atleast the ones not giving it scores based on name alone* in that it really is the worst Final Fantasy to come in a long time.

#27 Posted by Atomic_Tangerine (359 posts) -

I don't even need to watch that because I'm sure it's just the same complaints that we were talking about before the game even came out.  Looking at this thread, I'm pretty sure I'm right.
#28 Posted by Bones8677 (3225 posts) -
@MurderByDeath said:
" @Bones8677 said:
"And considering he made no attempt to actually get into the game because he knew he wouldn't be going through it all. It kinda renders the idea of a review pointless. He had valid criticisms, I have no problems with the video at all, just wondering why even do one if you weren't going to give the game, the benefit of the doubt from the very beginning.
It sounded to me like he was absolutely trying to approach it with an open mind and give it the benefit of the doubt, but that goodwill was very quickly crushed under a plethora of bad game design choices. "
Coming into a game with an open mind -- that doesn't sound like Yahtzee. Sure he's tried on a couple occasions, but I seriously doubt he did that with this game. Not like it really matters, I don't watch his videos for information, just entertainment.
#29 Posted by Bones8677 (3225 posts) -
@WilliamRLBaker: You clearly have not played X-2.
#30 Posted by ApertureSilence (1156 posts) -
@Bones8677 said:
" @MurderByDeath said:
" @Bones8677 said:
"And considering he made no attempt to actually get into the game because he knew he wouldn't be going through it all. It kinda renders the idea of a review pointless. He had valid criticisms, I have no problems with the video at all, just wondering why even do one if you weren't going to give the game, the benefit of the doubt from the very beginning.
It sounded to me like he was absolutely trying to approach it with an open mind and give it the benefit of the doubt, but that goodwill was very quickly crushed under a plethora of bad game design choices. "
Coming into a game with an open mind -- that doesn't sound like Yahtzee. Sure he's tried on a couple occasions, but I seriously doubt he did that with this game. Not like it really matters, I don't watch his videos for information, just entertainment. "
"I played Final Fantasy XIII because I am an unbiased critic - shut up, I AM - and must give everything a chance to surprise me, and after 5 hours the only thing that surprised me is how I managed that much without chewing off my own face." - Yahtzee.
#31 Posted by ryanwho (12082 posts) -
@Bones8677 said:
" @WilliamRLBaker: You clearly have not played X-2. "
Great game. Nonelinear structure, tons of side shit, one of the best battle systems in the series. Do girls make you uncomfortable, guy? Oh guy.
#32 Posted by Capum15 (4870 posts) -

"If this was Modern Warfare, I'd of curb-checked every terrorist in the free world by now."
 
Also, "Shut up I am!"
 
I lol'd. His videos are always good for a smile, laugh or two. Even games I love that he rags on, it doesn't bother me.

#33 Posted by Addfwyn (1919 posts) -

Eh, I can pass on yahtzee, he can do his thing and that's fine and all.  There's just so much cynicism in the gaming community as a whole these days that I can pass on a guy who's entire shtick is being cynical.  If he floats your boat, that's fine.  Just not my thing, I prefer being open minded to cynical.  

#34 Posted by Rhaknar (5939 posts) -

Gre tired of yathzee a long time ago, it stopped being funny (one could argue it was never funny) and it just sounds mean now. It basically like a professional troll. I know thats his thing, but i hate shit like this on forums, why wouldnt i hate it in video form >_>

#35 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -
@MurderByDeath said:
" @The_Laughing_Man said:

" @MurderByDeath said:

" @The_Laughing_Man said:
" @ThatFrood said:
" Link  I think it's an interesting one, certainly a different tone from most of his others. And please people, don't come in here and throw around the argument "he isn't a real reviewer". It's tired and old. "
Hes not...hes a CRITIC! Case closed. Its his job to find the faults in a game... "
That's not what "critic" means, it's not even what being "critical" means. Analyzing something critically is NOT about finding fault, but merely a detailed evaluation - positive or negative. "
If you watch his videos then you would get the joke. "
 Just because Yahtzee said it doesn't make it right (or funny). In fact, all it does is perpetuate a common, and extremely irritating, misapprehension.     "
It was a joke. And I find it funny. Just because you do not find it funny does not MEAN its not funny. 
#36 Posted by ZenaxPure (2569 posts) -
@Nictel said:
" @Symphony said:
" @ryanwho said:
" There are games you could be playing where you don't have to make excuses for them every 5 minutes. That's all I'm saying, before people start flipping out over a satirist's experience with the game. "
This but at the same time there are plenty of people who will enjoy it from the start and don't need to use a copout "it gets good after 20 hours" excuse. I consider myself one of those people. *shrugs* Different strokes for different folks and to those who don't enjoy the pace of the early game I say move on to greener pastures.   As always I enjoyed Yahtzee's review, he raised lots of valid points... though the footsteps one was odd. o.O "
 The loud deafening noise of footsteps on metal? Yeah. I was happy when they reached a non-metal surface. I tried not to notice it and blend it out. I can imagine that if you concentrate on it, it would get annoying fast. "
And yet the footsteps in this game are no where near as annoying of those in Parasite Eve >_>. After playing PE any footstep sound in any other game just isn't annoying.

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