It's hard to know where to begin. Like many people here, I've followed the GB crew since Gamespot. I went in and out of high school AND college watching every bit of these guys that I had time to. That's a profound thought. 12 year old me would've never guessed I would be sitting here at 21 so deeply affected by the death of a video game journalist. But, I think that speaks to Ryan's presence as an individual. He didn't feel like just a video game guy I watched on the internet, he felt like a real person. I won't be so arrogant as to say I knew him, but it just dawned on me today that I've listened to him talk more than I've listened to some of my closest friends talk. His voice on the bombcast has gotten me through break ups, exam weeks, boredom, and any other issues I might've had along the way since Giantbomb's inception.
Hell, when I started to get emotional over this today it was over the memory of him answering one of my dumb questions during a live show about Halo Reach. I did the thing I imagine everyone did, ask a very general question in the hopes it'll have a better chance of being read. Mine was. Ryan even said my name. And remembering how stupid it is that I felt special for that 3 or 4 years ago choked me right up.
I kept trying to rationalize, "It's only the internet, you have no right mourning over someone you never said a word to." Yeah well, fuck that. I do and I will miss Ryan Davis, genuinely. I've been hearing his voice and seeing his face for almost half my existence and it would be insane to look past that now.
From the bottom of my heart, Thank You Ryan Davis. I only wish I had said it sooner.