I had always meant to start a blog on GiantBomb. I had a bunch of ideas: spending a full year playing and writing about Oblivion, FIFA career mode match reports, a noir "starting over" story using Animal Crossing as the base. What I never wanted to do was write about death.
Like so many others, I was dumbfounded by the news. I had just put my daughter down for a nap and my other 2 boys had gone upstairs to play; so I sat down to check Twitter and was floored. I spent the next 2 hours in a tear-blurred haze reading as many tributes and blog posts as I could. Because, as corny and trite as it sounds saying about someone I've never met, it feels like I've lost a friend. From the earliest days reading Gamespotting, to the videos and podcasts; Ryan (and Jeff, and Brad, and Alex, and Vinny) have done an amazing job of giving us a view into their world and making us feel like a part of it. Waiting for that, "Hey everybody it's Tuuuuuesday." would always put a smile on my face. I'm 36 years old and stay at home with 3 young kids most days, so this was a nice little escape. To have a seat at the cool table and live vicariously through someone who was living the dream: writing about games, talking about games, and doing dumb (in the best way possible) stuff with games; this has meant so much to me.
I remember seeing a bunch of tweets from people on Ryan's wedding day (the wheelbarrow full of Diet Cokes, Jeff trying to tie a tie) and the love and enthusiasm was palpable. Here was a guy who loved life on what was probably the happiest day of his life, the highest of highs. It was infectious. At some point I remembered Ryan talking about how they had registered for a bunch of stuff on Amazon (no toilet stuff) so I decided to check it out. And the tweets were rolling in and I was sitting there bored and feeling happy for this guy who had brought so much entertainment into my life, so I decided to buy him a wedding present. The registry was still up and I could have it shipped straight to him, so, why not? A couple of salad bowls were the least I could do. He had brought so much joy to so many, I wanted to see if I could send a little his way. And it seemed just random and ridiculous enough that I though he might get a kick out of it.
I also want to take a minute to send a message to Jeff, Brad, Vinny, Patrick, Alex, Drew, (and Dave Snider, and Will Smith and so many others that have played a part).
We love you. We don't want to wait for someone else to pass to let you know. We appreciate all of the stupid and genius and stupid/genius things you do. You have given us so much pure, raw, unadulterated entertainment that we are forever in your debt. You have made us all feel like we're one of your friends. You've opened up your lives to us and shared so much that we can't help but feel like we know you. Creepy? Yes. But it's a fact.
But now you need time to grieve. Do what you need to do, take as much time as you need. Just know that we'll be here whenever you are ready to start laughing and sharing and probably crying again. Why? Because Video Games.