Log in or sign up to comment
463 Comments
Posted by Clonedzero

worst trailer ive seen in a long while.

Posted by Veektarius

Is there a reason I'm supposed to be rooting for the bald guy to defeat the sexy nuns? Because I totally wasn't.

Posted by monkeystick

Am I a scumbag misogynist for liking this trailer?

Posted by Anwar

Will this even end up in the game? I was bummed out that none of the CG footage for the trailers showed up in DX:HR.

Posted by spiceninja

We heard you guys like to masturbate so we made these nuns extra sexy and made this series based on stealth a full blown action game. Kick ass for the Lord this fall. Pre-order now.

Posted by XtremePudim

Apparently Hitman is slightly weirder then I was first lead to believe, hopefully he fights some Luchadores along the way.

Also, when he was closing the dead nun's eyes the only thing that I could think of was "Requiescat in Pace", that said, the Protagonist of AC3 has some big shoes to fill.

Posted by bunnymud

If I were the hyper-P.C. type I would be offended by this trailer.

But I'm not, so I think I'll be getting this game day one.

Posted by Chtasm

This is going to be the "Splinter Cell:Conviction" of the Hitman series, isn't it?

Posted by AndrewBeardsley

what the....

Edited by glyn

@louiedog: Would that be a super-serious game, with open world levels, which has an engaging and captivating story. Opening up the character of Agent 47.

Better enemy interaction, and an extremely epic and scary scare factor when the suspicion meter goes up ?

Edited by NTM

Whatever, I thought that was pretty cool. I love weird enemy characters. It's like, here are these nuns, oh wait, they're nuns that'll kill you with a blink of an eye! Hold on, hold on, oh wait, there's Agent 47, what's going to happen...? His bad-ass-self just killed them 'cause he's too clever an assassin!

It's like putting an almost untouchable force (47) against an unknown and intimidatingly deadly force, but the untouchable force is, as always, too good. I do hope this sort of thing happens in the campaign and it's not just some sort of multiplayer gimmick, where the nun (player) who kills Agent 47 gets to in return be Agent 47.

While I'm not entirely into what Tarantino or the darker side of Rodriguez does, this kind of reminded me of what I see in their films in some ways, and for what it is, I like it. Also, how many games do you get to kill "hot" nuns or hot women at all? Now, that's not something I hope to do 'cause I have something against women, but I do think this is somewhat unique.

Posted by Chadster

"Consider yourself absolved, bitch."

Edited by plaintomato

@bunnymud said:

If I were the hyper-P.C. type I would be offended by this trailer.

But I'm not, so I think I'll be getting this game day one.

No no no. Catholics are fair game for the hyper-P.C. crowd everybody knows that.

Anyway, over-stylized yeah, but if you just pretend they didn't suddenly strip down to patent leathers and strike a pose then everything else about that trailer was awesome.

Posted by Napalm

Shut the hell up, Jeff, this is exactly what I want from Hitman: Absolution!

Edited by FoolishChaos

You guys are crazy, that was a pretty cool trailer.

If having hyper sexualized lady assassins is a draw back for you, well then I don't know what to say.

edit: If you are turned off by the "actiony" hitman they are portraying, well they have been hinting for a long fucking time that this game will have action sequences

Posted by Krummey

What's the problem? Looks pretty badass.

Posted by august

Eh, I think it's perfectly plausible that occasionally some crazy-ass Kill Bill shit goes down in the Hitman universe.

Posted by squirrelnacho

I agree with the title of this post. It also seems the most of the people on this site have never played a Hitman game before.

Edited by MarkWahlberg

@dezvous said:

The cinematography in this trailer is mind-blowing. What a work of art. Love it.

That's actually what bothers me the most about this. Like, not only did they decide that a super serious portrayal of dominuntrixes getting murdered was a good idea (if this was campy, it would've been fine), but they put sooo much work into it. That's what makes the whole thing so creepy. Like, just imagining these guys at their desks, going 'and then he reaches up behind her gleaming porcelain neck, and throttles her to death - we'll do this part in slo mo.' 'Yeah! now make their leather bodices shinier!' And then they collectively cream their pants.

There's a reason people look down on people who play video games.

Although I will say, the image of nuns in the header makes the age barrier message even more funny.

Posted by Krakn3Dfx

This trailer was just as good as the Hitman movie!

Posted by notha

@MarkWahlberg said:

@dezvous said:

The cinematography in this trailer is mind-blowing. What a work of art. Love it.

That's actually what bothers me the most about this. Like, not only did they decide that a super serious portrayal of dominuntrixes getting murdered was a good idea (if this was campy, it would've been fine), but they put sooo much work into it. That's what makes the whole thing so creepy. Like, just imagining these guys at their desks, going 'and then he reaches up behind her gleaming porcelain neck, and throttles her to death - we'll do this part in slo mo.' 'Yeah! now make their leather bodices shinier!' And then they collectively cream their pants.

There's a reason people look down on people who play video games.

you know a videogame developer didnt make that trailer right? it was a vfx company. and what you're saying could apply to any horror movie. gasp, somebody finds something appealing that i dont!

Posted by Cogzwell

This trailer is pretty cool, and the style itself sorta fits hitman. but unfortunatelly the presentation doesn't feel very hitmany.

Posted by Deusoma
@Gabriel said:

In Hitman 2 weren't you working for a priest? Maybe this somehow ties into that.

Nah, you were hiding out in a church, and the bad guys kidnapped the priest to draw out 47. Then he went and got missions from the same Agency as the first game in order to pay his old network of contacts and find and rescue the priest.
Posted by Korne

This doesnt seem that bad. It is a well made trailer that fits pretty well within the gritty yet cartoony side of Hitman, and I could see a strange plot to assassinate 47 before he assassinates them. Just keep boss fights out... that would probably be the best move.

Posted by MarkWahlberg

@notha said:

you know a videogame developer didnt make that trailer right? it was a vfx company. and what you're saying could apply to any horror movie. gasp, somebody finds something appealing that i dont!

OH! VFX guys! Well in that case, watching them use a game trailer to showcase their sex fetishes is totally fine! And yeah, plenty of horror movies have weird sexual undertones. Some of them are good, some of them are bad. That doesn't make this any less stupid.

Literally none of what you said has anything to do with what I said. Congratulations?

Posted by august
@MarkWahlberg said:

@dezvous said:

The cinematography in this trailer is mind-blowing. What a work of art. Love it.

That's actually what bothers me the most about this. Like, not only did they decide that a super serious portrayal of dominuntrixes getting murdered was a good idea (if this was campy, it would've been fine), but they put sooo much work into it. That's what makes the whole thing so creepy. Like, just imagining these guys at their desks, going 'and then he reaches up behind her gleaming porcelain neck, and throttles her to death - we'll do this part in slo mo.' 'Yeah! now make their leather bodices shinier!' And then they collectively cream their pants.

There's a reason people look down on people who play video games.

Although I will say, the image of nuns in the header makes the age barrier message even more funny.

I think it's pretty campy in a Tarantino-esque kind of way.
Posted by glyn

@MarkWahlberg: Yer, didnt you know that Agent 47 has deep undertones. He is really a sexual creep , who stalks people and "assasinates" people in dark locked rooms...

aka, he likes dead bodies

Posted by bybeach

We will see what this all means. Looks pretty stupid in a well done way, but Hitman is a uniquely moral dude, whether by confining design or by the rule-set choice, in often pretty ill/decadent surroundings. It would not suprise me he closed her eyes as a sincere gesture. But this is..welll more comfortable territory for Saints Row than a serious-ass faced video game. In other words close to exploitive, well done or not. It's all how they explain the Nuns(obviously not nuns) and how they explain Agent 47.

Posted by Jace

It's like it reached into my wallet and pulled out my money.

Posted by ANt610

I have never been so pleased, yet so confused by one trailer.

Posted by Yummylee

It was a pretty cool CGI trailer. But c'mon, guys, that's all it was. I'm a little iffy about just how they're planning on 'updating' the series as well, but I think we should savour our shit flippin' till they start releasing actual gameplay trailers from the same... 'cloth'.... >_>

And even still just like the crew said on the bombcast, of course they're going to primarily being showing off the action scenes. I think Hitman Absolution is a game that can't be properly defined until we hear/read some closer to release previews and reviews down the line, because the marketing I highly doubt will be entirely representative of what the game is about. This is like the antithesis to how people were fucking creaming over the Old Republic after seeing all of the CGI trailers because they actually believed that's how the gameplay would play out. Dead Island as well.

Don't get me wrong, after what's happened to RE, I couldn't be more emphatic to people getting pissed at the idea of Hitman opting for a more mainstream all-action route. I'm just willing to give this game a little more time before I completely swallow my own tongue, because of the reasons I said above.

...I've been reluctant to post this because I'm 99% certain that someone is still going to bite my head off @_@

Posted by KidA

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Posted by Brendan

This was so amazingly well done. That's about all I got.

Posted by august

Guys let's keep in mind that the end of Hitman 1 features you mowing down a insane asylum filled with your own clones with a chain gun.
 
Not saying that's good Hitman level design, just that the series itself is pretty ridiculous.

Edited by jasondesante

hopefully hitman isn't like this.

lets hope games get worse over time because we're old and tired.

Posted by Agent47

@Veektarius:When was anybody supposed to root for 47?He's a HITMAN,always has been nothings changed, and it's not like this is anymore over the top then that mission with the heaven and hell party and the angels wore a one piece suit in Blood Money.Seems nobody has really played a Hitman game around here,cause this isn't far from it's style.

Posted by Zamir

can't wait play the "Nuns With Guns" Level

Posted by Danishmaggot

Whatever. That shit was pretty awesome!

Posted by kpaadet

It seems Jeff and alot of others haven't played a Hitman game, if they think this is crazy or over the top for a Hitman game.

Posted by ManU_Fan10ne

awesome trailer, imhp one of the best in a while

Posted by Dethfish

The original assassin...pfft. I'd take Ezio over Agent 47 any day.

Nice job, Hitman. You killed a bunch of nuns. Congrats.

Edited by Danishmaggot

@Dethfish: Those are obviously not real nons you silly person!

Posted by Keithcrash

Hopefully it is EXACTLY like this trailer.

Posted by Dvsshark

Why does it seem no one here has played the none of the previous hitman games. You play the 47th clone of like 3 or 4 different war lords who goes on mission ranging from infiltrating the white house to attacking some weird hotel heaven and hell themed sex party. Hitman has always been campy and weird, this video fits the universe pretty well. Also since this is a cg video it dose'nt really show of the gameplay of the game.

Posted by jayjonesjunior

@whylessness said:

this game looks like ass

did you got that from a CGI trailer?

Posted by iAmJohn

@warxsnake said:

So like, Hitman Blood money had a mission during mardi gras where you killed people in bird suits. What's the problem with this?

You know, somehow I don't think assassinating people while in a ridiculous costume befitting of the setting is quite the same thing as having a violent brawl and shootout with a group of assassin nuns in a motel parking lot.

Posted by yyZiggurat

Is this the new Sister Act game?

Posted by TadThuggish

Is this a fucking joke?

Posted by MikeGosot

Sexy nuns are good. Sexy armed nuns are even better, but... That kind of gunfight in a HITMAN game? No, thank you.

Posted by skelington_

Man, i am really sick of seeing women over-sexualised (even sexualised at all) in video games. I really hope the industry grows up at some point, and learns that you don't have to show a stripper masquerading as a nun to get your demographic's attention. Female characters can be appealing when they keep their clothes on. The trailer's tone instantly puts me off, so yes i do hope the game is absolutely nothing like the trailer, and doesn't grossly objectify women.