Posted by Nate (705 posts) -

This was originally posted on my blog -- http://natevanderzee.wordpress.com

Last week I observed Ash Wednesday. On the Christian calendar this marks the beginning of Lent, a 40 day period leading up to Easter in which Christians take a look inward and reflect on their need for Christ. Christians often select something from which to fast during Lent as a way of reminding them of Christ's sacrifice and as a way of walking with Christ as he fasted for 40 days in the wilderness (the exact reasons and origins of Christian fasting during Lent are a little murky). They may fast from sweets, from meat, from alcohol or caffeine, or any number of other luxuries that we indulge in on a daily basis. Some folks even choose to fast from . . . video games. Not me, though. I have to admit I've never fasted from anything during Lent, or not that I can remember. I won't get into the reasons, but I will say when it comes around every year I briefly think about giving up video games, and very quickly dismiss the thought. Still, I have decided to take the opportunity during this Lenten season to be more introspective. To examine myself and to ask God to examine me. In light of that call to examination I do want to turn a critical eye toward my gaming habit. So, here we go!

I want to give credit to this post by Jordan Ekeroth over at gamechurch.com for inspiring this post. The article had a lot of interesting points, but mainly I'm grateful that he pointed me to an article by Dr. Mark Klein on the Escapist. You can (and should) read that one over here: http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/columns/ask-dr-mark/10177-Issues-Gamers-Should-Think-About

In the above article Dr. Klein is responding to a question about the seemingly knee jerk reaction of the gaming community to accusations that video games are having a detrimental effect on our culture and are a factor in real world violence. I, like Jordan Ekroth over at game church, believe we should react strongly to these accusations and should reasonably and passionately defend the medium. As both Jordan and Dr. Klein express, however, there are concerns with gaming that we should probably be more honest and thoughtful about. Dr. Klein points out seven concerns, and I'd here like to highlight a couple of them that ring true to me. Understand that these are not research-based concerns, but are concerns he expresses that I feel are validated by my own life experiences.

Gaming and Intimacy -- Does gaming influence intimacy with my wife? It sure can - if I let it. I have to admit that I rarely go to bed at the same time as my wife, because a) she goes to bed way too early sometimes (8 or 9 pm), and b) I stay up pretty late playing games some nights. While Dr. Klein also talks about the decrease in sex drive from excessive gaming, I have no intention of getting that personal here with you, dear internet stranger. I will note that going to bed at the same time as my wife provides at least a few minutes to emotionally connect with each other before we fall asleep. We can share anything we haven't had a chance to during the day, bring up random thoughts or questions, and I suppose there's probably something to just lying next to someone as you both fall asleep. It seems that can build intimacy. Right? Maybe? Anyway, I'm making a goal to go to bed at the same time as my wife more often, especially on nights when she's going to bed after 10 pm. I can do that. I should do that. It would be good for us.

Reality had a hard time competing with Skyrim at times.

Gaming and Pleasure – Dr. Klein asks whether or not the pleasure we derive from games might supersede that found in real world experiences. While I personally have a wonderful family, a job I genuinely enjoy, solid church community, and a comfortable material life (albeit stressful at times), I have at times bought into the lie that what I experience in games is far greater than the hum drum of my daily life. There are moments in games that can transport you and give you an amazing rush of emotion. While I wouldn’t say my experience in games makes my outside life pale in comparison and I don’t honestly think this is a huge struggle for me, I have experienced it enough and spoken to others who have that I am slightly concerned. I don’t think it’s healthy when we long to escape reality for more enjoyable virtual worlds. Games might be a meaningful and healthy escape at times, just as a good book can be, but that word escape does make me wonder.

Eastown, Grand Rapids, Michigan. One of the most walkable neighborhoods I've seen and I live right in the heart.

Gaming and Community – It’s really easy to get involved in gaming communities online, and it’s actually quite hard to avoid for serious gamers. But are those online communities a decent substitute for other relationships? Of course not. I hope we can all agree on that. In my case, gaming is not a hobby that is conducive to me reaching out to my neighbors. Being a husband, father, teacher, student, an active church member, and playing video games on a regular basis keeps me pretty busy. If there are any relationships in my life that suffer because of my hobby, it is likely the neighbor relationships. While other are out making sure their lawn is well kept, walking their dogs, and generally getting out around town, I’m playing video games. I mow the lawn, I go to the block party, I walk a lot of places in the neighborhood. Still, were it not for a hobby that keeps me in the house quite a bit, I might be out there more getting to know my neighbors. While I don’t intend to sacrifice my habit to get to know my neighbors better, this is a reminder for me to be more active and intentional in building relationships with my neighbors with the time I do have out on the block.

Conclusion - I think it's important for me to maintain a healthy balance in life. I must recognize that I am first and formost a follower of Christ, secondly a husband and father, and somewhere far lower on the list . . . a gamer. My prayer is that this lenten season will be one of reflection and introspection on my gaming habit. Perhaps next year I'll feel led to give up games completely for 40 days. Not so sure I like the sound of that.

How about you? Ever give anything up for lent or give up games for a time for any other reason? Do any of the above concerns ring true for you?

#1 Edited by believer258 (11992 posts) -

<p>It's only Catholics that do Lent, as far as I know. I can't name any Protestant denominations that do.

Edit: Also, I have never given up games for a time. I have found that when it's time to put them down, I usually do it.

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#2 Posted by Nate (705 posts) -

@believer258 Actually, it's not just Catholics that observe Lent. A lot of mainline protestant churches are reclaiming lost traditions such as this. I know Lutherans are pretty into observance of the church calendar, but a lot of non-denom and other protestant churches are heading that way too. Anyway, thanks for your comment.

#3 Edited by triple07 (1198 posts) -

I've given up games for Lent before but I am not giving anything up for Lent this year as I don't think it does much for me personally. I have friends who have decided to give up things for Lent this year as well but I just don't feel like I would be doing it for the right reason right now.

To your other points, I think it is sometimes difficult to balance your responsibilites with gameing, whether they be social spiritual or otherwise. Often I would rather just play some video games than go hang out with friends but I know that is often the wrong choice so I make myself go out anyway.

#4 Edited by DaMisterChief (628 posts) -

I have no "spirituality" so i really never see my self giving up anything. Outside sucks, inside rules

#5 Edited by Nate (705 posts) -

@damisterchief: I hear you loud and clear on that. I can totally relate. I guess the difference is I fight that tendency in me. Not trying to get too preachy here, and I certainly don't blame you for thinking the way you do if you don't share my convictions. But I guess I think of delving too deeply into any hobby or habit a bit like this:

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

C.S. Lewis

It's not that video games are the equivalent of "playing in the mud". Rather, sacrificing community, family, or the giving of oneself in service to others causes us to miss out on great things that God has for us. Again, don't expect you to share that conviction. Just wanted to say I can relate to your feeling, but am not comfortable with that in my own life.

@triple07 I feel the exact same way on both points.