@bartok: Sorry to hear that your depression was untreated for so long - if you don't mind me asking, are you getting any help with it now? As to the unfinished games I can understand not wanting to feel like the escapisms that you have enjoyed are going to be taken away, but maybe there will be an unexpected joy in the closure of seeing something you've loved through to the end? As to the OCD and Pokémon, for the longest time I avoided that franchise because I knew I wouldn't be able to enjoy it without "catching 'em all." However, I finally took the plunge with X and I've just been enjoying the game as is, and actually enjoying it! As for trophies and achievements, they have been the source of some terrible times for me. Trying to get a party together at 7am after 24hours because I was in a different time zone and then boosting for 8 more hours AFTER that, hellish is indeed the word. But as with all things mental health and can and does get better with time and effort. Thanks for the comment and for reviving the thread duder, hang in there and if you need anything post a comment or feel free to PM me :)
@cranzor: As someone who has had some issues yourself you know that while they can be very painful and difficult to live with, they don't have to always be the epicentre of everything and I certainly have found so many more positive and good things in my life now that I have been through treatment and am working to apply that stuff every day going forward. But I totally agree that there is such a broad spectrum of ways people react to all kinds of media that scrutinising those reactions from different demographics can help us to understand the art forms we love even further. Yea, I said art there :).
@jeust: I am interested in what it is in life that the games are distracting you from (if you don't mind me asking) as that can often be a huge insight into how life in general feels for you when you work out what it is that you don't want to examine. I wish I had head that quote before because it is utterly insightful, not surprising considering it's from Jung but nonetheless thank you for sharing it. I will be keeping that one for future use!
@mithical: I certainly appreciate the wide range of very positive comments in this thread and although the other thread has some really interesting point I really do like what we have going on here :). Thanks so much for linking to it though, whatever the reassurance that there are others out there who have and are going through the things you are, it always helps. Relapses are a very cruel and very real part of all recovery, although I don't agree with the stance that some people have that you can never get better - there is certainly a much higher chance of falling into an unhealthy pattern if it's been something you're already so used to doing previously. I've had this kind of thing recently where a brand new OCD behaviour came out of nowhere and I've wasted a lot of money and time on it, now I've recognised it and am moving ahead again, but I know it happens and to not punish myself for being human and making a step back. I can (and so can anyone) step forward again. Thank you for the encouragement and know that it is absolutely returned, let me know in a PM or comment if there's anything I can do to help keep things going. Stay strong duder!
@deckard42: Thanks for reading! Wether or not you have some issues locking content - however trivial - from some people and not others is always crappy in my opinion.
@popeanonymous: Have you got any access to any kind of professional help with mental health issues? This honestly sounds like a pretty serious set of behaviours that are taking up a lot of your time and resources. I can understand a reluctance to deal with them because on the days where it's not so bad you can believe that the last time was the 'last time'. Then a bad day comes along, throws everything to hell and you're straight back to the destructive/unhelpful behaviour. While you're in the midst of that the last thing you'll be thinking of is getting help I'd imagine, it's just a case of satisfying the need to do whatever it is that triggers that. Please, if you can talk to someone and try to get this sorted. If it's causing such an unhelpful behaviour now, leaving it will only make it worse. Feel free to PM if there's anything I can do. People can and are willing to help make this something you don't feel youhave to do forever.
@supberuber: I've been through (and honestly still go through) those same patterns and they are very indicative of some form of mental health issue. It's so easy to feel like you're being 'lazy' or just 'not trying hard enough' but you feel like you're working at your limit, and you are. That's what depression did to me, it made my boundaries and possibilities so limited that the everyday life of normal working/studying hours felt completely impossible. Please don't feel like the past has been failures, it's not your fault if you don't know what's been making life so hard for you and you really have been struggling against those odds. Fortunately things really can improve with time, effort and help to deal with the underlying issues and then get into a routine of life that makes you feel fulfilled. It's a long and difficult process, but anything is better than the horror of continuing that current cycle of constant feelings of inadequacy and general ennui. Good luck and if you need anyone to talk to about this stuff feel free to comment here or send a PM.
@gruebacca: I'm really glad I could help give you a different angle of insight on this issue. I think it's so important for people who suffer to talk to others if they can, and for those who don't I'm always grateful when they listen openly and are ready to hear a state of mind that isn't there own - so thank you for that, it's a great sign of you being successful in psychology as not many people are able to empathise so well.
@porousshield: I have done EXACTLY the same thing. I've also felt the need to play with subtitles since I started with this behaviour so I can quickly read the lines ahead and then enjoy them being said and know I've not missed anything. I've also done the whole watching a let's play to find that line of dialogue, so really I understand where you're coming from. I don't have any specific strategies to combat that, but I would say that distraction techniques only work for so long. They are not fixing the problem and until you find a place or a way to do that you will face these kind of thoughts and over time they only become more and more demanding. I'm happy to talk anytime so feel free to leave a comment here or PM if there's anything I can do, but know that you are absolutely not alone with those exact behaviours and thought patterns.
@biospank: I try really hard not to compare how bad or severe mine or anyone else's problems are in relation to any other. If it's affecting you it's something that's important. However if you feel it's relatively minor and non serious then that's only a good thing, just make sure you don't downplay it if it really is affecting you. Thanks for the comment duder.
@mikaelboogart: First of all congratulations. You've clearly worked incredibly hard to challenge a very deep and destructive behaviour. I can only imagine how tough that was and the fact you've made such progress is a huge testament to your character and commitment to improving things in your life. I think everyone has that moment of realisation as to the thoughts/feelings/behaviours that have been plaguing them and realising it's actually a case of mental illness - I certainly had that with depression and the diagnosis of it. I flat out refused to believe it for the longest time, but acceptance really is that huge step that can lead to all the others of recovery. Anyway, congratulations again duder and keep on trucking.
@medacris: There are absolutely SO many misconceptions out there, it's pretty upsetting when you hear the same tired stereotypes trotted out again and again in relation to mental health - it's no wonder a huge amount of people have no understanding of how they can actually affect the day to day lives of those who suffer. I would very much like to read that post so please link it whenever it's done! As to the stuff you have dealt with in relation to games, it's behaviours I can either recognise in myself or certainly empathise with. The avoidance of 'hard' games is really interesting to me, I would have thought from the perfectionists streak in my OCD that I'd feel the same way, but it almost makes those kind of games seem like a challenge I have to beat just because they're there. Whereas the reality I'm sure is in the middle, they're things millions of people have played and enjoyed which are challenging but not that hard! If only we could convince our minds to be rational about this kind of stuff easily... Hang in there duder and good luck with the studies.
@napalmtrees: So much about your post is familiar to me, so please never feel like you're on your own with any of this stuff. I'd also encourage you to not feel about your behaviours that have been challenging in a way that makes you feel negatively towards yourself, there will have been a reason why those behaviours started and that's OK. You're doing the hardest thing of starting to identify and work on those issues, so you're going in the right direction! Keep at it and if you ever want to talk more feel free to post here or send me a PM.
@wsgexe: The fact that it keeps you up at night means it's obsessive and is probably pretty unhealthy. Any thought that can intrude when you'd rather be relaxing/sleeping is one that you can do without and the only way to challenge that is with decent strategies and/or professional help - wether that's pharmacological or psychological or both would be up to you. Until then though, just keep going forward and trying to understand what it is that makes you feel the need for that stuff to be 'clean', writing it down and picking it apart can help to make it seem less absolutely necessary. It helps to fixate less on the how to alleviate the obsession by giving into it and more on how to understand why it's powerful and work on that instead.
@sharkman: I totally understand the appeal of games as a kind of psychological opiate. They can absolutely serve that purpose but be careful to not ignore the core issue for too long, it will come around and bite you in the ass eventually!
@draugen: For me specifically the Watch Dogs thing happened at a stage where I was stronger in my challenging of my OCD issues so I was able to just get the standard edition. However, after the fact and during a lapse (the one which started the Unity thing!) I purchased a copy of the Ded_Sec edition. More for the physical 'swag' than anything in game particularly. It depends on the franchise honestly as to how strong the obsessive stuff is.
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