Rage and online video games.

I have come to the conclusion that I have a problem, that problem is that I get too angry when losing at online games. I have been trying to control it for some time but from time to time find it extremely hard to do, one of the worst things about this is the more angry I get, the worse I play, this becomes a snowballing effect of sorts. I now have started forcing myself to turn off games when this becomes an issue, trying to take a break, and take a breath.

So In now ask you guys, do you get angry at games? How do you deal with it? Have you found something that works for you to calm your spirits?

Gears of War is the one franchise that really makes me boil. Usually it's when I'm having a bad game or "that guy" comes and kills my down. I usually just go play a less stressful game and that does the trick for me.

I don't get angry angry, but I can get pretty damn frustrated. I shy away from playing competitive online games, mostly shooters, as of late because of this. Or I at least make sure I'm playing with a group of friends so if I get angry I'm a part of an equally disgruntled mob. What works for me is to change up the type games I play. As of late I've been more into strategy and role playing games that allow me to go at my own pace and I guess, have fun playing games instead of getting pissed off.

@Turtlebird95 said:

Gears of War is the one franchise that really makes me boil. Usually it's when I'm having a bad game or "that guy" comes and kills my down. I usually just go play a less stressful game and that does the trick for me.

Yes, gears takes the cake as the most frustrating shooter I have ever played.

@big_jon said:

@Turtlebird95 said:

Gears of War is the one franchise that really makes me boil. Usually it's when I'm having a bad game or "that guy" comes and kills my down. I usually just go play a less stressful game and that does the trick for me.

Yes, gears takes the cake as the most frustrating shooter I have ever played.

Even though I consider myself to be a capable Gears player and can keep up with the "best of em" I have my moments where I'll get killed a couple times and I start to get annoyed which then snowballs into rage. Getting more pissed causes me to play worse cuz I'm not thinking straight and then I start playing like an idiot as I desperately try to get a kill which causes me to suck more ass. In those cases turning off the game is the best medicine. I've become better at it by simply trying to not take every game seriously like it's the big leagues or something.

Also as a side note I noticed that playing most games (especially Gears) extremely baked has led to me having some of my best all time games. I'm starting to think that not having a care in the world while playing like that allows me to easily rack up kill streaks.

So in other words, take less shit seriously.

Very few times I got crazy enraged while playing online was during a few matches of Halo, Call of Duty, and Battlefield, but I just backed off for like half an hour, did things around the house, and then played again fine.

Sounds like you're more angry about losing to other people than at actual games, OP. It's just a thing you'll have to live with if you're going to play competitive online games regularly.

I've learned to not care about score and just play games for funzies. Some people are competitive by nature, and when they start feeling others are outperforming them, they get heated. You either learn to not care, or you avoid these types of games. No easy way to do away with it.

@Zomgfruitbunnies said:

Sounds like you're more angry about losing to other people than at actual games, OP. It's just a thing you'll have to live with if you're going to play competitive online games regularly.

I've learned to not care about score and just play games for funzies. Some people are competitive by nature, and when they start feeling others are outperforming them, they get heated. You either learn to not care, or you avoid these types of games. No easy way to do away with it.

True, it sucks being competitive sometimes, but it is very hard to turn off.

@Colourful_Hippie: I guess I need to start doing "the drugs" to calm my nerves. ;)

I never get angry at games and never get angry at people when playing online. 
That's probably mostly because I either play with a group of people dedicated to just play games for fun and not try to be "Super X-treme Mega Double Dew MLG" at the games were playing. 
Or I just join servers dedicated to playing for fun and when someone gets out of line just ban his ass from the server (That's the good thing about owning your own BF3 and TF2 servers :P ) 
 
Now I could understand if people were actually playing in tournaments, then it would be alright to be upset with losing. 
But with most peoples tempers there are no teams willing to take them in, I'm sure. 
 
I commend you for at least just saying "fuck it" and turning the game off. 
It's a good start and you realize that there's no point in ruining the game for others when you eventually turn on a microphone and start screaming at people.

@big_jon: Totally. It's hard for someone who cares about something to learn to not care about it. Heck, I was an angry Counterstrike player for the majority of my teenage years until I realized all that anger wasn't doing me any good and made the voluntary attempt to stop being so angry. Took me a few years, but eventually I got the hang of it. That's not to say I never get angry anymore. When I feel the anger building, I just turn the game off or go do something else for a change of pace. On some level, it's not about making yourself impervious to the emotion but learning to deal with it quickly and not have it get the better of you.

Also, probably just me, but I find a little alcohol usually helps because everything is funnier when I'm buzzed.

Online fighting games. 'Nuff said.
Spend 15 minutes looking for a match and then get juggled for half the match.

@ZeForgotten said:

I commend you for at least just saying "fuck it" and turning the game off. It's a good start and you realize that there's no point in ruining the game for others when you eventually turn on a microphone and start screaming at people.

I avoid that problem by only playing online without a mic. I'll only talk when I'm playing with friends, but even then I've never become angry enough to want to yell at people though the internet cuz what the hell does that solve?

I only get extremely angry when either the game itself starts causing me to die or because of lag. Nothing pisses me off more than getting ready to take down an enemy player, only to not have the shot not register and him rubber-banding away then immediately getting killed because I was so focused on taking him down.

Also, Counter-Strike source used to really piss me off when someone would come around the corner and the game decided to play some stupid flail animation on the model. I never understood what caused it, but it was always so random and always made me pause which would lead me to have a bullet instantly piercing my skull.

If the game itself is running just fine, I have no problem and just take deaths with a grain of salt. Once the game starts to make me die, that's when I get irritated because it is something I have no control over.

@ZeForgotten said:

I commend you for at least just saying "fuck it" and turning the game off. It's a good start and you realize that there's no point in ruining the game for others when you eventually turn on a microphone and start screaming at people.

I avoid that problem by only playing online without a mic. I'll only talk when I'm playing with friends, but even then I've never become angry enough to want to yell at people though the internet cuz what the hell does that solve?

I dont get angry.

I'm a bit inconsistent in how I handle my frustration, sometimes I'll just quit the game straight away especially if I'm not too far into it but other times I'll grit my teeth and grunt till I'll get past it. My anger doesn't stem to multiplayer games however since I know there really isn't a story objective and there are other players much better than I am.

Playing Call of Duty online pisses me off. Seriously, that franchise for whatever reason unlike any other has the ability instantly make me rage.

I know it myself. Imho (at least in my case) it means you currently invest too much emotional energy / interest in your competitive online game of choice. I'd say get some more variety in the things you're currently trying to achieve.

@Rattle618 said:

I dont get angry.

Yeah, that's my answer.

Last time I had a real rage moment was trying to do the Bonelich bonus segments in Zack & Wiki: Quest for Barbaros' Treasure. I'm more likely to make a small mistake and have someone rage at me. I just quit out if multiplayer gets too heated.

Playing COD I noticed that I get frustrated slam my controller on my bed. I visited a friend and saw a pile of broken controllers which I found unbelievable.

The only time I really get angry is when I feel like the game has somehow cheated me through bad design. Otherwise, it's just a multiplayer video game. If you aren't playing it to have fun, why the hell are you playing it?

When I was younger I used to get pissed at just about everything in games mostly when losing. I remember when playing the Turok reboot I was going through the game again on the hardest difficulty and that god damn end boss t-rex kept kicking my ass and after about 12 retries I through my controller into a shelf and it cracked the whole left handle. Was actually able to just tape it back together, those xbox controllers take a ton of punishment. Happy to say I kicked that habit more or less. I get angry sometimes when playing online or even in something like Ratchet and Clank 2 with the stupid starship combat but I just say something and that's it no more breaking shit. I feel you though with gears and I used to get pissed on Bad Company 2 mostly because of stupid snipers everywhere.

Once the rage really starts to flow I turn the game off, hopefully before I start feeling too murderous. I was going to say I used to be a controller destroyer but my four year streak of not breaking shit ended a few days ago.

I don't take games super serious anymore. I used to rage when I lose at MvC 3

The once and only time was when playing Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters I threw my controller at my friend and gave him a black eye. I'm not proud of any part of that.

Totally get you about the madder you get the worse you play, you start thinking about your actions too much and self doubt creeps in which puts you on tilt instead of just 'playing', especially when you know you're good at the game. But yes I find myself turning the game off so I can cool off but then I have in mind 'don't rage quit, don't be that guy'. I don't know, who have we anything to prove in online gaming? It's stupid really.

I don't get angry when I lose online and I've never understood the mindset of people who do. One of my friends can get really angry when he continuously loses and I'm all the time having to help calm him down and make him understand it's just a game and to enjoy it.

I rage all the time! And sometimes rage QUIT

I don't get all that mad at online games, mostly because I don't put too much importance on MP in the first place. Once I stop having fun, I know its time to quit.

Angriest I've ever gotten at a game was Halo Reach, I could write a diatribe at the colossal fuck ups and sabotage that game was plotting against me, and all of that is only the campaign.

When I do play MP or at least when I did, I didn't care if I lost, I just got really into it. I would get annoyed at myself if I missed a shot or such. I would also get really annoyed if I ran into a cheap sob like in UFC or Street Fighter IV. I used the term 'horse shit' a lot during the old LAN days.

The only thing that gets me angry in video games are people who rage quit. Take your beating with some dignity!

Playing offline in tournaments for Persona 4 Arena's kind of ruined playing online for me now. I used to watch Excellent Adventures and all that with Gootecks and Mike Ross and whenever they'd complain I thought they were being unreasonable. Turns out that it's totally justified, once you get used to playing people in person it's really hard not to get angry at lag for fighting games.

I've gotten frustrated, but never super angry. If I gotten to that point I would just turn off the game and play again later.

Until I was about twenty I was a professional at throwing the bitchiest of bitchfits when playing games. Shouting, complaining, saying the game is "gay" or "fucking stupid," just the worst kind of person imaginable. Wasted too much money on controllers that I'd spike into my wood floor until they shattered. Snapped a couple disks. When the day before my thirteenth birthday I punched out a window and lacerated the top of my hand because of something game related, though I can't recall to memory what provoked it. Needed twenty stitches, have a permanent scar as a reminder.

It was an issue.

I noticed a couple things: when I'm playing a game too much over the course of a couple days I tend to find things, mostly unconsciously, to get irritated with. It's like spending too much time around a girlfriend or a roommate. The little things got to me when, really, they shouldn't have.

Beyond that, I began to understand that when I was tired or lacking sleep I snapped easier. It sounds obvious, that sort of thing, but I was the sort of person who thought on some level that I was impervious to that. Invincible. That manner of hubris. Sleep didn't affect me, is what I thought. Truth was, it totally did.

---

Acknowledging the issue is a big step. It's ten times easier to be all like, "Naw, fuck you. I ain't got shit for problems," but ignoring the physiological changes you go through and ignoring your process of finding scapegoats doesn't help you in the long run.

Here's the thing. This is something I felt about myself and something that's probably true for ninety-nine percent of people. I'm not a professional gamer. I'm not getting paid to be good at games, there's no appreciable value in slogging through something that isn't fun for me. And that's the point of playing video games, isn't it? To have fun? Being frustrated and managing that frustration to get better at a game is absolutely a rewarding process, but as a mature human being there's a line you need to be able to spot and react to accordingly. Especially if you're anything like I was and allow your anger to manifest in physical ways that can lead to actual injury.

Halo is a game. Call of Duty is a game. Mortal Kombat is a game. Being shitty at said games isn't some infringing statement about you as a person. And if that's the case, then losing a round here or a couple rounds in a row certainly don't mean anything either. It doesn't matter if it was just lag, or a dude was cheating, or the guys were camping the whats-a-whozit. You have the freedom to walk away. And that's my strategy. Yeah, maybe the Gambler's Fallacy might get reinforced, and maybe I'll win the next match and things will round out on their own, but if it doesn't? If it doesn't and I'm just not enjoying myself? What does it matter if I win anyway? Is a victory in a computer game where I'm running around as a robot guy trying to shoot other robot guys with a laser gun really that important?

So now I just take a really deep breath when I feel myself resenting the game, check my phone, look at something stupid on Reddit, try to find a way to laugh. Get up and stretch out. Fresh air, as condescending as this stereotypical advice sounds, usually helps.

TL;DR -- Games aren't that important. Respect yourself enough to take a break.

@big_jon: I'll get really angry and Gears of War multiplayer as well. Same goes for fighting games. I'll start cursing and shouting at the TV and everything. I use to be really bad and would have to buy new controllers every two months it seemed. I've learned to just keep saying to myself that it's just a game and to just take a deep breath, turn off the system calmly, and either watch TV for a bit or do something on my laptop to calm down.

Another way I've dealt with the rage was to switch out games to play a Co-Op online game. Like Mass Effect 3, Syndicate (when I can find a game), or the Horde mode in Gears 3. I find Co-op games to be more satisfying and less rage inducing.

I used to get insanely angry at games...(not only online ones) when losing...I don't anymore, at least not nearly as much...my secret? I grew older and very tired of getting angry for no reason...so now I just play as long as I don't get angry...If I get angry I stop playing because what's the point then?

@HistoryInRust: Thanks for the post, I found it somewhat helpful. One of the biggest issues is that I play games to feel good, and that has turned into me wanting to be in the top tier of the main games that I play in order to feel that way, those games are Halo, and Battlefield. I find that I start to expect a good performance out of myself every game, when that does not happen I then get frustrated. I feel like skill at a game is some soft of necessity to enjoy it, that if I am not above average then I am not doing well enough. Maybe part of that stems from some inner turmoil of trying to be good at everything I like, I don't really know. I do very well in Halo and Battlefield for the most part but there are those times where it is lag, bad team, off day, or just a good team of opponents. The other issue is that I often feel that it is out of my control which serves to further frustrate me.

I remember throwing an N64 controller or two at the T.V when I was younger - I don't know what game it was- but I tend to calm myself down nowadays.

Gears of War 3 can still get me pretty riled up though. It's usually related to the shotgun; sometimes a surprise shotgun rusher, and a lot of times my inability to counteract an obvious shotgun rush.

@HistoryInRust: That's a really good post. Thanks!

I have a terrible problem with dota.

Let me set this up. I am in the normal, which is the lowest, skill pool. But I have still played around 300 hours of dota. But I have EASILY watched double the amount of pro games/steamers content (most notably purgegamers, if you want to learn dota go to his website/youtube channel), and therefore know the mechanics through and through. I'm just not especially good at executing them.

So the problem comes when I consistently see people fucking up and doing the most noobish things of all time, but they refuse to take any advice because I don't have the most kills on the team. This is especially infuriating when pick support because everyone instalocked a carry...ugh. So After 50 minutes of some person (often a Brazilian or Russian) flaming everyone and refusing to take any advice, I get pissed. Like REALLY pissed. I just wasted 30 minutes to an hour with the biggest asshole I've met in that day dying over and over again.

This is why I think the dota community is known for flaming new players. It's just so frustrating when people refuse to take advice and tell you to be quiet and just play the game. It's a freaking team game and you want me to just run off and do my own thing. And I'm the asshole?

...I'm going to get a drink.

Hell yea, getting angry and shouting at a game is a great way to blow off some pent up steam in a very controlled and non harmful fashion (just don't rage at other actual people if they can hear you, don't be an asshole). Combined best with some physical exercise/exertion at the same time.

Being a super balanced, calm and passive individual 99.99% of the time (with at times a stressful job), it's great heaving this therapeutic pressure release valve.

I get frustrated when playing Battlefield and there's a sniper that has obviously played the map a hundred times and knows JUST where to go prone to snipe me like five times before I find his little hidey ledge. But, adapting and learning, and finally taking that fucker out makes it worthwhile.

I get angry at games plenty of times as well, though it is usually for poorly implemented game mechanics and terrible UI/control choices rather than gameplay results.

I usually take it as a reminder that I shouldn't be wasting precious time with games that aren't fun, regardless of their ratings, popularity, or wasted potential.

i have found myself getting progressively more angry at games the more i play online...whether it be fifa call of duty or even halo. I would just play until the rage hits it peak and then turn the game off and throw shit around. Now if i get angry i either just shut the game off and move onto another one, or If i still want to keep playing the game let out my anger with a curse word or two, take a bathroom break and come back. Ive stopped throwing shit around and going full blown rage, and Im gonna keep working on it until I dont get angry at all while playing. I know i wont be the best at any game, but there is just something in your mind that makes you think that you are the best. I am a really good fifa player, and the only time I lose is either to lag or cheap sprinting/glitching gameplay. It sucks knowing you lost, but also you have to take it with a grain of salt if you lose to some kind of game exploit. I find the gaming community around games like call of duty to be getting progressively worst. You cannot go a game without a 10 year old kid being racist on a mic or a whole team of guys sitting in spawns and camping. I am also gonna try to play less online and more solo stuff in the future. Most of the time when I play solo stuff I just blame the game for being bad instead of raging at it XD.

I am surprised at how many people are responding to this thread, at least it is nice to see that I'm not alone.

I never get angry at loosing in competitive games, I just don't like them a lot.

Its inevitable that other people will be better than me at a game, specially when some can play it for 15 hours a day... It is only natural that they play better than me.

If anything, it makes me focus on helping me team to the best of my capacity, instead of playing by myself.

That is reason I am not much into competitive online, except when its team deathmatch. I would rather play co-op in borderlands than deathmatch in Call of Duty.