I feel that there are just too many issues being thrown around at the same time, and it's just blocking any headway anyone on either side can make.
The issue of corruption in the enthusiast press has been raised long before the rise of indie games, and it will be around for years to come. The people who support Gamer Gate but maintain that they aren't part of the "bad ones" are just hurting their own arguments by taking up a banner for a group that has already been written off by those they are trying to convince. The ethical problems will still be considered problems tomorrow, and many of the journalists that Gamer Gate supporters are railing against are well aware of them.
However the issue that remains here and now is the issue of harassment. The fact that a feminist or feminism advocate (or Men's Rights Advocate, or whoever) cannot raise concerns with the media they enjoy without being subjected to threats against their physical and psychological health is a travesty - any medium worth anything must be able to be criticized, and ironically the people who vilify the Anita Sarkeesian's of the world for wanting to "censor their games" are instead censoring any possible discussion from any possible perspective, even their own.
In the end though, it's just as you say - the majority of people who play games either don't know or don't care about it enough to get involved, and any change that does come probably wont matter to them. But thanks to people like them, that change will come, and it will be for the better, because video games are bigger than any hashtag movement or any perceived controversy, and as more people from more diverse backgrounds start playing games and making them - even if it doesn't matter to them - the medium can only evolve.
And now I've spent far too long writing a response that pretty much rephrases what OP said, so I'm going to go outside or something.
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