Posted by captjim (129 posts) -

HELLO INTERNET AND WELCOME TO MY GIANTBOMB BLOG HERE I AM GOING TO FURIOUSLY POUND OUT WORDS ON MY PRIMITIVE TYPEWRITER ABOUT GAMES. PLEASE ENJOY
 
 over the years videogames have developed a subtle art to them: being an asshole in singleplayer. and this isn't just any kind of utilitarian asshole behavior that would satisfy you and i in day-to-day life, no sir. this is city-destroying assholery, be it nuking the whole place or taking it down a person at a time. i could go on but you get the gist. you've played the sims, gotten people to go swimming, and deleted the ladder to get out. you've made your cities in simcity become hilarious nightmares to live in - only to show every whiny asshole who lives there how much worse life could be by sending down a few disasters. my point is this: there is a beautiful art to being an asshole in singleplayer games. my god, how beautiful. no words. should have sent a poet, etc. let's get on with the fucking list.

15. ASSASSIN'S CREED 2
 

 
so you can't kill more than a couple civilians. so what? be creative. poison a guard and throw some money down near him. while the crazy bastard swings around at random, civilians will decide the cash is worth the risk and dive for it. it's hilarious to see how many people get taken out this way. i've only played this game a couple of times but this was so funny i had to put it on the list.

14. STAR WARS EPISODE 1
 
 
probably better than the movie it was based on. if you hate gungans you will love this game, because you can massacre the whole damn city of them. you can go on a killing spree on tatooine and that planet that's all a city, just so long as you don't harm any major characters. any npc that's not a movie character or questgiver (and even then some of them aren't immune) can be killed with little conseqences. doesn't sound like much when i describe it, but believe me it is a lot of fun to remove every single person from tatooine except for anakin, his mom, jar jar, and padme, all of whom are wondering just who this gosh darn homicidal maniac is. 
 
  http://i45.tinypic.com/ifbajp.gif

13. JUST CAUSE 2
the grappling hook. that is all.  
 
 
 

12. DEFCON
it's hard to get more dickheaded than callously offing millions of people with the touch of a button, and that's exactly what you do in defcon. everything about the game is detached and soulless to a point of being depressing - but that's what the devs were shooting for. you casually fling out missiles that, if everything goes right, destroy entire cities and kill dozens of millions of people. and that's where you get your points - the casualties. for bonus asshole points, i've always imagined the player character as some overweight, balding desk jockey at NORAD or STRATCOM (or their equivalents in the other countries you can play as), just sitting in his chair boredly staring at the computer and sipping on his gigantic-sized slurpee as he clicks missile silos and then cities, damning the entire world in a hellish firestorm of nuclear fission. just another day at the office.

11. GRAND THEFT AUTO IV 

   http://i136.photobucket.com/albums/q195/Divius/GIF/2366767497_5345942ce6_o.gif 

 
i was one of the few people who didn't flip their shit over this game. but that's a story for another time. what kept me going in it more than the game itself was the many creative opportunities to be an ass. grand theft auto 4 is a revolution in being a dickhead. for example, shoving people around. doesn't sound too exciting? oh, that's because it's not. until you start shoving people off things like bridges. sure, you can shove people into traffic, but get creative for fuck's sake. push them into subways. hell, just running into someone is sometimes enough to knock them down. nudge someone sitting on the side of a bridge and suddenly they're in the ocean. it's an adventure in being a jackass. then there's being able to pick things up from the environment: this means that you can walk up to someone with a cappucino, knock them down, then pick up their cappucino and beat them up with it. then there's getting other people arrested: run up to someone. punch them. let them attack  you. then lure them to a cop. they'll get arrested. but wait, there's more! when they're doing the surrender animation, walk into them and interrupt it. the cop will interpret that as them not standing down, and will actually fire on them and chase them down. and you, the actual criminal, can just sit back and watch the chaos unfold. assholery at its finest.

10. POSTAL 2

an obvious choice. postal 2 lets you taze people til they piss themselves, just cutout the middleman and piss on people, throw scissors around, play soccer with people's heads, make elaborate traps involving pouring lines of gasoline and throwing matches (couple this with the fact that you can lure cops by putting down donuts and you've got a potent combination), and incite elephants to rampage and crush  the marching band right in front of them. you can engage in police brutality by stealing a cop outfit and, if my memory serves correctly, you can smack people with nightsticks all you want and no consequences.
 
9. BLACK AND WHITE 
more fun than playing the game itself was being a dick. you're god and your abilities to be an asshole are unending and unrivaled. you randomly chuck rocks into people's homes, set people on fire, throw your creature's poop into the village food storage, teach your creature to poop on things, bitchslap your creature til it falls on a house. you get the gist. a lot more rewarding than playing the actual game.

8. SAINTS ROW 2
remember all that stuff i said about gta4? make the actual game fun and make being an asshole even more outrageous and fun and you have saints row 2. i could use so many examples, but i'll just pick one: there are old people who have oxygen tanks that you can shoot, and they explode like they're explosive barrels. it's outrageous and over the top and oh how fucking beautiful. 
 
7. CRACKDOWN

you are robocop. obey the prime directives. 1: serve the public trust. 2: protect the innocent. 3: uphold the law. 4: fuck all that shit, be a dickhead. kick cars off bridges and into each other. shoot tires out of cars going highspeed and watch them cartoonishly cartwheel into the sky. the police want to fuck you over? toss a few incendiary grenades their way. fight crime? eh, sure, sometimes. just do it creatively. and with those kung-fu kicks that send people flying into the horizon. all this and no ed-209 to spoil the fun. all the goofiness of saints row taken to even further extremes and with a cool comic-book style.
 
6. EVIL GENIUS
if you don't design your base to be a massive sprawling maze of traps that will doom every tourist and agent who sets foot in it, as well as a good chunk of your faceless minion population, then you're playing this wrong!

5. MASS EFFECT 2
this should come as no surprise to anyone who's played any part of either mass effect game: there's a lot of shitheadedness to be found in shepard. shepard can be a huge goddamned son of a bitch by doing things like leaving allies to die, getting their familymembers offed, exiling them, and so much more and i don't want to accidentally spoil it for anyone. i'll leave it at this: on top of everything i said, you can push people out windows while spouting one liners, make enemies drink poison, gun down surrendering troops, and set up romantic interests only to shoot them down at the last second because THE MISSION. COMES. FIRST. plus you can be be a party-ruining creeper and a smug indie music prick. 

4. FALLOUT 3
just because civilization's over doesn't mean you should stop being a dick. or even tone it down. my character in fallout 3 is decked out looking like randall flagg - cowboy hat, pair of shades, set of combat armor (i think ranger?) and just like the walkin' dude himself, i spread chaos and misery wherever i go. i don't think enough nukes were set off in world war 3 - let's add one more. bye-bye megaton. nice knowing you, tenpenny towers: you're now a swirling nexus of undeath. i think that everywhere i went save for rivet city, hell followed. 

3. ROBOT ALCHEMIC DRIVE

an underrated gem of a game where you control a giant robot charged with guarding cities from other, more evil giant robots, but with a unique twist: your character controls it from ground-level with a remote control, and you can switch between controlling the robot and the protagonist.
you're charged with defending japan from evil robots. you get paid more for doing it well. however, it's not at all required. in some missions there aren't even enemies but you're doing training, and you can still demolish towns all the same. you can also do stuff like pick up pedestrians (who, when the town is attacked, flood the screen in packs of upwards of 40 or 50 people) and throw them. you can do the same with cars.
being a dick in this game truly shines in your interaction with characters: you get the opportunity to knock off three members of the supporting cast towards the end of the game. sure, two of them are actually cool, but fuck the third one. you can demolish buildings previously identified as your friends' homes and workplaces. one possible love interest must be rescued from life-threatening situations at several points in the game, and you can just leave her there to rot and each time, hilariously, she emerges barely hanging onto her life and finds out you could've helped if only you gave a fuck. there's a girl in the game who's been your friend since you were kids, and although all the voiceacting is bad, hers is like the worst or second worst. but the game must know this, because it gives you the opportunity to actually get her to kill herself. she's an orphan who has to work for herself, and at various points in the game you save her in combat and sometimes she asks you to help her with errands, to protect her workplace or home, and she not-so-subtly suggests that you accidentally take out the competitors. if you don't complete her errands, never help her when she's caught in the crossfire, destroy her home and workplace every chance you get while protecting rival businesses, this orphan teenage high school student who's basically suffering from malnutrition will kill herself. because of you. the game further encourages you to be a douche by actually rewarding you with a huge amount of cash for destroying her businesses and protecting rivals.
this game is a beautiful piece of art and i pray it gets a sequel at some point. i know that prayer will never be answered, but still.  

2. DEUS EX
 
 
in the future, everything is a conspiracy. you are jc denton, a nano-augmented agent working for the united nations who conspires to be a badass asshole that gives no fuck. almost everyone is killable. this means that you can blow up little kids for nagging you. you can kowtow to someone sending you on a quest for that item you need to continue... or you can just shoot them. that journalist writing bad stuff about you in the newspaper? dispose of him. official united nations business. terrorists have taken hostages in the subway and set explosives all over it? just toss in a few grenades. at several points in the game, enemies surrender to you and you can just gun them down. so what if your bosses give you guff? IT'S YOU WHOSE LIFE IS ON THE LINE AND YOU'RE A LOOSE CANNON WHO WILL TAKE HIS STAND IN JUNGLELAND AND WAS BORN TO RUN ON THUNDER ROAD!!! at another point, you're at a scene where a man and his daughter's house has basically been taken over by a thug. you can just take out the thug, or you can arm the dad and help him take out the thug. or see if he can do it himself. or help the thug. or kill them both. or kill all three. the scene that takes place if the dad dies? the girl cries "oh, daddy!" your character's reponse? "yeah, yeah, what a shame, whatever, i dont give a shit."
also, you can take an old man off life support against his friend's wishes. deus ex has truly mastered being an asshole.
there's even a walkthrough dedicated to being an asshole: http://www.it-he.org/deus.htm i just hope the third game will be one third as good. spoiler alert: it won't be.

1.PERSONA 3 and 4



the persona games offer a unique opportunity to be an asshole, in the form of social links. do i need to go into social links? persona's popular around here and i really don't feel like it so whatever. anyway, as you meet new people, you're given the opportunity to make an ass of yourself. socially. say all the wrong things to make people hate you - tell girls they don't look good and they eat too much! tell all your jock friends that they'll never make it in professional sports! crush dreams of romance! laugh at your friends when they confide in you! make every situation as awkward as possible! refuse to help your friends with anything! depress children and relatives! blackmail that one creepy businessman until he likes you! reinforce your peers' poor dignity, self-esteem, self-images, and complexes! convince a child it's all her fault her parents are divorcing! there's all this and so much more! you haven't won until you've made your town heaven for therapists, counselors, and psychologists.
these games allow you to literally become the physical embodiment of all things asshole. one of the options on the sports social link in persona 4 is to "be an ass" instead of helping your teammates. this should tell you all you need to know. you should go buy both of these games right now. for a lot of reasons. but pretend that i was the deciding factor. you're welcome.
 
got any other games where being a prick is just as fun as the game itself? then drop a comment and tell me! or be an asshole and don't. it will show that you've taken away a good few tips from all this.
#1 Edited by captjim (129 posts) -

HELLO INTERNET AND WELCOME TO MY GIANTBOMB BLOG HERE I AM GOING TO FURIOUSLY POUND OUT WORDS ON MY PRIMITIVE TYPEWRITER ABOUT GAMES. PLEASE ENJOY
 
 over the years videogames have developed a subtle art to them: being an asshole in singleplayer. and this isn't just any kind of utilitarian asshole behavior that would satisfy you and i in day-to-day life, no sir. this is city-destroying assholery, be it nuking the whole place or taking it down a person at a time. i could go on but you get the gist. you've played the sims, gotten people to go swimming, and deleted the ladder to get out. you've made your cities in simcity become hilarious nightmares to live in - only to show every whiny asshole who lives there how much worse life could be by sending down a few disasters. my point is this: there is a beautiful art to being an asshole in singleplayer games. my god, how beautiful. no words. should have sent a poet, etc. let's get on with the fucking list.

15. ASSASSIN'S CREED 2
 

 
so you can't kill more than a couple civilians. so what? be creative. poison a guard and throw some money down near him. while the crazy bastard swings around at random, civilians will decide the cash is worth the risk and dive for it. it's hilarious to see how many people get taken out this way. i've only played this game a couple of times but this was so funny i had to put it on the list.

14. STAR WARS EPISODE 1
 
 
probably better than the movie it was based on. if you hate gungans you will love this game, because you can massacre the whole damn city of them. you can go on a killing spree on tatooine and that planet that's all a city, just so long as you don't harm any major characters. any npc that's not a movie character or questgiver (and even then some of them aren't immune) can be killed with little conseqences. doesn't sound like much when i describe it, but believe me it is a lot of fun to remove every single person from tatooine except for anakin, his mom, jar jar, and padme, all of whom are wondering just who this gosh darn homicidal maniac is. 
 
  http://i45.tinypic.com/ifbajp.gif

13. JUST CAUSE 2
the grappling hook. that is all.  
 
 
 

12. DEFCON
it's hard to get more dickheaded than callously offing millions of people with the touch of a button, and that's exactly what you do in defcon. everything about the game is detached and soulless to a point of being depressing - but that's what the devs were shooting for. you casually fling out missiles that, if everything goes right, destroy entire cities and kill dozens of millions of people. and that's where you get your points - the casualties. for bonus asshole points, i've always imagined the player character as some overweight, balding desk jockey at NORAD or STRATCOM (or their equivalents in the other countries you can play as), just sitting in his chair boredly staring at the computer and sipping on his gigantic-sized slurpee as he clicks missile silos and then cities, damning the entire world in a hellish firestorm of nuclear fission. just another day at the office.

11. GRAND THEFT AUTO IV 

   http://i136.photobucket.com/albums/q195/Divius/GIF/2366767497_5345942ce6_o.gif 

 
i was one of the few people who didn't flip their shit over this game. but that's a story for another time. what kept me going in it more than the game itself was the many creative opportunities to be an ass. grand theft auto 4 is a revolution in being a dickhead. for example, shoving people around. doesn't sound too exciting? oh, that's because it's not. until you start shoving people off things like bridges. sure, you can shove people into traffic, but get creative for fuck's sake. push them into subways. hell, just running into someone is sometimes enough to knock them down. nudge someone sitting on the side of a bridge and suddenly they're in the ocean. it's an adventure in being a jackass. then there's being able to pick things up from the environment: this means that you can walk up to someone with a cappucino, knock them down, then pick up their cappucino and beat them up with it. then there's getting other people arrested: run up to someone. punch them. let them attack  you. then lure them to a cop. they'll get arrested. but wait, there's more! when they're doing the surrender animation, walk into them and interrupt it. the cop will interpret that as them not standing down, and will actually fire on them and chase them down. and you, the actual criminal, can just sit back and watch the chaos unfold. assholery at its finest.

10. POSTAL 2

an obvious choice. postal 2 lets you taze people til they piss themselves, just cutout the middleman and piss on people, throw scissors around, play soccer with people's heads, make elaborate traps involving pouring lines of gasoline and throwing matches (couple this with the fact that you can lure cops by putting down donuts and you've got a potent combination), and incite elephants to rampage and crush  the marching band right in front of them. you can engage in police brutality by stealing a cop outfit and, if my memory serves correctly, you can smack people with nightsticks all you want and no consequences.
 
9. BLACK AND WHITE 
more fun than playing the game itself was being a dick. you're god and your abilities to be an asshole are unending and unrivaled. you randomly chuck rocks into people's homes, set people on fire, throw your creature's poop into the village food storage, teach your creature to poop on things, bitchslap your creature til it falls on a house. you get the gist. a lot more rewarding than playing the actual game.

8. SAINTS ROW 2
remember all that stuff i said about gta4? make the actual game fun and make being an asshole even more outrageous and fun and you have saints row 2. i could use so many examples, but i'll just pick one: there are old people who have oxygen tanks that you can shoot, and they explode like they're explosive barrels. it's outrageous and over the top and oh how fucking beautiful. 
 
7. CRACKDOWN

you are robocop. obey the prime directives. 1: serve the public trust. 2: protect the innocent. 3: uphold the law. 4: fuck all that shit, be a dickhead. kick cars off bridges and into each other. shoot tires out of cars going highspeed and watch them cartoonishly cartwheel into the sky. the police want to fuck you over? toss a few incendiary grenades their way. fight crime? eh, sure, sometimes. just do it creatively. and with those kung-fu kicks that send people flying into the horizon. all this and no ed-209 to spoil the fun. all the goofiness of saints row taken to even further extremes and with a cool comic-book style.
 
6. EVIL GENIUS
if you don't design your base to be a massive sprawling maze of traps that will doom every tourist and agent who sets foot in it, as well as a good chunk of your faceless minion population, then you're playing this wrong!

5. MASS EFFECT 2
this should come as no surprise to anyone who's played any part of either mass effect game: there's a lot of shitheadedness to be found in shepard. shepard can be a huge goddamned son of a bitch by doing things like leaving allies to die, getting their familymembers offed, exiling them, and so much more and i don't want to accidentally spoil it for anyone. i'll leave it at this: on top of everything i said, you can push people out windows while spouting one liners, make enemies drink poison, gun down surrendering troops, and set up romantic interests only to shoot them down at the last second because THE MISSION. COMES. FIRST. plus you can be be a party-ruining creeper and a smug indie music prick. 

4. FALLOUT 3
just because civilization's over doesn't mean you should stop being a dick. or even tone it down. my character in fallout 3 is decked out looking like randall flagg - cowboy hat, pair of shades, set of combat armor (i think ranger?) and just like the walkin' dude himself, i spread chaos and misery wherever i go. i don't think enough nukes were set off in world war 3 - let's add one more. bye-bye megaton. nice knowing you, tenpenny towers: you're now a swirling nexus of undeath. i think that everywhere i went save for rivet city, hell followed. 

3. ROBOT ALCHEMIC DRIVE

an underrated gem of a game where you control a giant robot charged with guarding cities from other, more evil giant robots, but with a unique twist: your character controls it from ground-level with a remote control, and you can switch between controlling the robot and the protagonist.
you're charged with defending japan from evil robots. you get paid more for doing it well. however, it's not at all required. in some missions there aren't even enemies but you're doing training, and you can still demolish towns all the same. you can also do stuff like pick up pedestrians (who, when the town is attacked, flood the screen in packs of upwards of 40 or 50 people) and throw them. you can do the same with cars.
being a dick in this game truly shines in your interaction with characters: you get the opportunity to knock off three members of the supporting cast towards the end of the game. sure, two of them are actually cool, but fuck the third one. you can demolish buildings previously identified as your friends' homes and workplaces. one possible love interest must be rescued from life-threatening situations at several points in the game, and you can just leave her there to rot and each time, hilariously, she emerges barely hanging onto her life and finds out you could've helped if only you gave a fuck. there's a girl in the game who's been your friend since you were kids, and although all the voiceacting is bad, hers is like the worst or second worst. but the game must know this, because it gives you the opportunity to actually get her to kill herself. she's an orphan who has to work for herself, and at various points in the game you save her in combat and sometimes she asks you to help her with errands, to protect her workplace or home, and she not-so-subtly suggests that you accidentally take out the competitors. if you don't complete her errands, never help her when she's caught in the crossfire, destroy her home and workplace every chance you get while protecting rival businesses, this orphan teenage high school student who's basically suffering from malnutrition will kill herself. because of you. the game further encourages you to be a douche by actually rewarding you with a huge amount of cash for destroying her businesses and protecting rivals.
this game is a beautiful piece of art and i pray it gets a sequel at some point. i know that prayer will never be answered, but still.  

2. DEUS EX
 
 
in the future, everything is a conspiracy. you are jc denton, a nano-augmented agent working for the united nations who conspires to be a badass asshole that gives no fuck. almost everyone is killable. this means that you can blow up little kids for nagging you. you can kowtow to someone sending you on a quest for that item you need to continue... or you can just shoot them. that journalist writing bad stuff about you in the newspaper? dispose of him. official united nations business. terrorists have taken hostages in the subway and set explosives all over it? just toss in a few grenades. at several points in the game, enemies surrender to you and you can just gun them down. so what if your bosses give you guff? IT'S YOU WHOSE LIFE IS ON THE LINE AND YOU'RE A LOOSE CANNON WHO WILL TAKE HIS STAND IN JUNGLELAND AND WAS BORN TO RUN ON THUNDER ROAD!!! at another point, you're at a scene where a man and his daughter's house has basically been taken over by a thug. you can just take out the thug, or you can arm the dad and help him take out the thug. or see if he can do it himself. or help the thug. or kill them both. or kill all three. the scene that takes place if the dad dies? the girl cries "oh, daddy!" your character's reponse? "yeah, yeah, what a shame, whatever, i dont give a shit."
also, you can take an old man off life support against his friend's wishes. deus ex has truly mastered being an asshole.
there's even a walkthrough dedicated to being an asshole: http://www.it-he.org/deus.htm i just hope the third game will be one third as good. spoiler alert: it won't be.

1.PERSONA 3 and 4



the persona games offer a unique opportunity to be an asshole, in the form of social links. do i need to go into social links? persona's popular around here and i really don't feel like it so whatever. anyway, as you meet new people, you're given the opportunity to make an ass of yourself. socially. say all the wrong things to make people hate you - tell girls they don't look good and they eat too much! tell all your jock friends that they'll never make it in professional sports! crush dreams of romance! laugh at your friends when they confide in you! make every situation as awkward as possible! refuse to help your friends with anything! depress children and relatives! blackmail that one creepy businessman until he likes you! reinforce your peers' poor dignity, self-esteem, self-images, and complexes! convince a child it's all her fault her parents are divorcing! there's all this and so much more! you haven't won until you've made your town heaven for therapists, counselors, and psychologists.
these games allow you to literally become the physical embodiment of all things asshole. one of the options on the sports social link in persona 4 is to "be an ass" instead of helping your teammates. this should tell you all you need to know. you should go buy both of these games right now. for a lot of reasons. but pretend that i was the deciding factor. you're welcome.
 
got any other games where being a prick is just as fun as the game itself? then drop a comment and tell me! or be an asshole and don't. it will show that you've taken away a good few tips from all this.
#2 Posted by SSully (4186 posts) -

Pretty good list, but i think postal 1 should be the first one on that list. I mean you can piss on people after you set them on fire.....

#3 Edited by luce (4045 posts) -

Majora's Mask and Demon's Souls are both good singleplayer asshole games
 
Although in one of those games, you are also the victim of douchery 

#4 Posted by Sweep (8861 posts) -

I used to randomly kneecap pedestrians in GTA4, just for laughs. 
 
The paragraph about P4 made me laugh. I never actually played it but I don't know if I would be able to be a dick to Chie. Or Nanako. 
 
Animal Crossing was another good one. Go into some poor bastards town and chop down all his trees :D

Moderator
#5 Posted by CowMuffins (1760 posts) -

Uh, you forgot Second Life and Garry's Mod. Also, Red Dead Redemption.
 
I don't like your list.

#6 Posted by SpiralStairs (1020 posts) -
@captjim:  The sunglasses at night link is a must read for any Deus Ex fan. 
 
I will one day get everyone to attack that damn vacuum cleaner.
#7 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -

Wow, an oddly good read. My favorite asshole moment is to set my training mode to Man vs Woman in Tactics Ogre. Either way, I come across as a sexist asshole. Also doesn't hurt to name your characters funny things, like:
 

#8 Posted by Djeffers03 (2545 posts) -

Haha Im loving this thread!

#9 Posted by habster3 (3595 posts) -
@CowMuffins said:
"Uh, you forgot Second Life and Garry's Mod. Also, Red Dead Redemption."
And InFAMOUS.
#10 Posted by CL60 (16906 posts) -
@SSully said:
" Pretty good list, but i think postal 1 should be the first one on that list. I mean you can piss on people after you set them on fire..... "
I agree. Postal 2 should be number one. Pissing in peoples mouths until they vomit, then lighting them on fire is a pretty douche move.
#11 Posted by captjim (129 posts) -
@CL60 said:
" @SSully said:
" Pretty good list, but i think postal 1 should be the first one on that list. I mean you can piss on people after you set them on fire..... "
I agree. Postal 2 should be number one. Pissing in peoples mouths until they vomit, then lighting them on fire is a pretty douche move. "
oh god! i can't believe i forgot about that! 
 
especially fun on the day postal dude gets gonorrhea. i may have to do a take 2 of this list later on.
#12 Posted by captjim (129 posts) -
@CowMuffins said:
" Uh, you forgot Second Life and Garry's Mod. Also, Red Dead Redemption.  I don't like your list. "
haven't gotten far enough in red dead redemption. and notice that this is exclusively single player.
#13 Posted by Rockanomics (1150 posts) -

You could throw in the Tomb Raider games :P You run around poaching the shit out of wild animals, smashing ancient pottery and stealing historical artifacts. (Actually a huge fan of the series)

#14 Edited by zityz (2360 posts) -

You should have put Prototype on that list. Running by at top speed, grab a person by thier face, run them up the side of a building while theyre still dangling in your hands, run to the top of the building then launch them off into another building at top speed while they splash into a pile of blood and guts. 
 
Oh sure the actual missions are horrid pieces of shit, but roaming around the world fucking things up is next to amazing.
#15 Posted by Fontan (318 posts) -

Black and White is epic. Feed the children to your Creature, then burn the mourning father's house. That's complete assholeness all-around. 
 
You should have mentioned Red Dead Redemption. Lassoing people across the city? Check.

#16 Posted by armaan8014 (5404 posts) -

*applauds*

#17 Posted by Meteora (5787 posts) -

Ahahaha, this is a great list.

#19 Edited by thegoldencat7 (1497 posts) -

Agreed on Deus Ex. Very few games give you such a vivid sense of freedom.

#20 Posted by demontium (4709 posts) -

Now I need to play deus ex :S

#21 Posted by JerichoBlyth (1044 posts) -

Dude! I thought I was the only one to do that in Star Wars Episode 1! lol

#22 Posted by DiscoDuck8k (499 posts) -

Oh wow, you are awesome for posting the Deus Ex link. I knew about that from ages ago, but couldn't remember the name or where to find it to save my life. I had no clue about the bit with killing Sandra's father until recently either. Hilarious stuff.

#23 Posted by Sparklykiss (1965 posts) -

This reminds me of the days when I used to play Tales of Symphonia constantly. When I felt like it, I'd get Collette to fall in love with Lloyd and lead her on only to dump her for Raine. And then dump Raine for Sheena. And overall just ruin the trip for everyone. 
 
Those were the days.

Moderator
#24 Edited by captjim (129 posts) -
@drag:  good call. will grab some images in a few minutes.
#25 Posted by gunstar (252 posts) -

buying deus ex on steam means it takes next to nothing to reinstall.
 
cuz, ya know. every time someone brings it up you HAVE to reinstall.
 
Also, you can be a pretty colossal dick in Fallout 3

#27 Edited by thegoldencat7 (1497 posts) -
@drag: 
Hee hee, genius. I think I just settled for a big pile in the reception area.
#28 Posted by captjim (129 posts) -

PURDY PICS AND VIDEOS IN THE OP NOW!!!!

#29 Posted by scarace360 (4828 posts) -

What about state of emergency 1.

#30 Posted by captjim (129 posts) -
@scarace360 said:
" What about state of emergency 1. "
well, if my memory serves me right, all you could really do was kill a lot of people. and you could only do it by shooting them and meleeing them, nothing really goofy or outlandish. and in a riot just getting a bunch of dudes killed is not particularly distinguished. very fun though.
#31 Posted by mylifeforAiur (3484 posts) -

You can also be a bastard in Morrwind, it's literally possible to kill everybody, also the original Fallout is pretty dickish in general, considering everybody will kill you if you look at them the wrong way ;)

#32 Posted by scarace360 (4828 posts) -
@captjim: You have a pretty good memory.
#33 Posted by gakon (1952 posts) -

Aw man, what about the classic Half-Life 2 throwing cans at people? Or murdering all the guards and scientists in the original Half-Life. Good times...

#34 Posted by TheBaddestOfThemAll (28 posts) -

I don't know but I think the old Kagero games go in this list too. and Ghostmaster. And  The Sims.

#35 Posted by EVO (3908 posts) -
@captjim said:
then there's being able to pick things up from the environment: this means that you can walk up to someone with a cappucino, knock them down, then pick up their cappucino and beat them up with it.
Really? I know you can pick up bricks, but I never thought of picking up cups.
#36 Posted by Portis (1287 posts) -

I spent way too much of my time pushing pedestrians down stairs in Grand Theft Auto IV.

#37 Posted by Yanngc33 (4496 posts) -

Halo should be in there that thing is full of assholes

#38 Posted by TheGreatGuero (9130 posts) -

Time out. You could pick up random objects in GTAIV? How did I not know this? I knew you could pick up hot dogs at the vendors and throw them at people, which is a riot. Wow, I gotta go back and play it again. And yes, pushing people down in GTAIV is just LOVELY.

#39 Posted by Grimnazra (3 posts) -

U forgot the black & white games, being a GOD of dick heads rules kill people force there skeletons to be ur undead slaves sacrifce children to ur evil dominion and steal stuff from the enemy thats just b& w 1 in 2 u can make armys :) but i love games involving a tribe or population u control its a big stress ball type game to me nothin makes am asshole happier than killin an intire tribe then bringing them back to a true hell on earth (ur dead yet still gotta work!!!! scarry)

#40 Posted by buft (3317 posts) -

Since its already Necro'ed, i would like to add the Star wars MMO, man you can be a serious douchebag at all times and as a sith inquisitor you can have a companion whos always got your back for some real douchebaggery. Blew dudes out the airlock of a ship because they shouldnt have been there, khem val loved it!

#41 Posted by DarthOrange (3864 posts) -

Saints Row 2 and Fallout 3 were games in which being a dick was fun. I don't see how anyone could have enjoyed themselves playing Fallout 3 as the good guy. Also, based on the quick look for Sleeping Dogs I think it is safe to say that game would fit on an updated list quite well.

#42 Posted by believer258 (11907 posts) -
@DarthOrange
Saints Row 2 and Fallout 3 were games in which being a dick was fun. I don't see how anyone could have enjoyed themselves playing Fallout 3 as the good guy. Also, based on the quick look for Sleeping Dogs I think it is safe to say that game would fit on an updated list quite well.
Yeah, you can do some messed-up stuff in Sleeping Dogs. Grab a random passerby and slam his head in a car door, or kick him into a phone booth, or just break his fucking leg.
#43 Posted by Vextroid (1404 posts) -

How about Bully? Wedgies for everyone!

#44 Posted by jsnyder82 (734 posts) -

Beating people to death with a giant purple dildo is pretty neat.