Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -

All of us have encountered annoying game characters. Just about every game has at least one character who irks you more than any other. Sometimes the game's designer intends it, and other times they don't. Some are just so annoying, you just want to step into the game world and knock them cold. After playing many games for over a decade, I've come up the definitive list. It spans many games, from many consoles, over many generations. You have to dig deep to find so many annoying characters. I seriously want to punch all of these guys* in the face. 
* BoG is a gentleman, and does not punch ladies. 
Here we go: 

5. Edward Chris von Muir 

 
Before Edward Cullen was making us all cringe, this Edward was setting the standard for anoying Edwards. He is better known as the "spoony bard" from Final Fantasy IV. Edward deserves a smack. He whines, then he whines some more. His combat specialty? Hiding. Seriously, Edward, you suck.  
 

4. Zell Dincht 

This one is very appropriate, because Zell fights with his fists. It's about time somebody gave him a taste of his own medicine. Zell is the lamest jock character ever created. 
Zell, you suck. 

3. Vaan  

Final Fantasy XII's main character is a really annoying twerp. He's so lame, that Sqaure seems to have abandoned him very early in the game, in spite of his leading role. All he does is whine about how he wants to be something more than he is. You are NOT Captain Basch Fon Ronsenberg of Dalmasca. I hope Basch punches you. Vaan, you suck.   
  
  
 

2. Tidus 

Tidus is a professional athlete. People admire him for his Blitzball skills, but he's even better at crying. He has a reputation for being a cry baby. He needs someone to hit him really hard. Tidus, you suck.  
  
  
 

1. Snow Villiers 

Snow, you suck. Snow is not only the character I most want to punch, but also the character that has made me vomit most due to his massive amounts of cheesiness. Snow, you suck. 
  
  Thoughts?
#1 Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -

All of us have encountered annoying game characters. Just about every game has at least one character who irks you more than any other. Sometimes the game's designer intends it, and other times they don't. Some are just so annoying, you just want to step into the game world and knock them cold. After playing many games for over a decade, I've come up the definitive list. It spans many games, from many consoles, over many generations. You have to dig deep to find so many annoying characters. I seriously want to punch all of these guys* in the face. 
* BoG is a gentleman, and does not punch ladies. 
Here we go: 

5. Edward Chris von Muir 

 
Before Edward Cullen was making us all cringe, this Edward was setting the standard for anoying Edwards. He is better known as the "spoony bard" from Final Fantasy IV. Edward deserves a smack. He whines, then he whines some more. His combat specialty? Hiding. Seriously, Edward, you suck.  
 

4. Zell Dincht 

This one is very appropriate, because Zell fights with his fists. It's about time somebody gave him a taste of his own medicine. Zell is the lamest jock character ever created. 
Zell, you suck. 

3. Vaan  

Final Fantasy XII's main character is a really annoying twerp. He's so lame, that Sqaure seems to have abandoned him very early in the game, in spite of his leading role. All he does is whine about how he wants to be something more than he is. You are NOT Captain Basch Fon Ronsenberg of Dalmasca. I hope Basch punches you. Vaan, you suck.   
  
  
 

2. Tidus 

Tidus is a professional athlete. People admire him for his Blitzball skills, but he's even better at crying. He has a reputation for being a cry baby. He needs someone to hit him really hard. Tidus, you suck.  
  
  
 

1. Snow Villiers 

Snow, you suck. Snow is not only the character I most want to punch, but also the character that has made me vomit most due to his massive amounts of cheesiness. Snow, you suck. 
  
  Thoughts?
#2 Posted by N7 (3574 posts) -

I think Vaan gets a pass just because of Mega64. And I never found Tidus that annoying... But dude... How can you have a list of annoying characters and NOT include Hope? I was playing like 30 hours of that game hoping he would just drop dead.

#3 Posted by Video_Game_King (36087 posts) -

How far have you played into Final Fantasy XIII? Because he eventually realizes how much he sucks and takes steps to remedy that.

#4 Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -
@Video_Game_King: Still not very far. Every time I play, though, I want to punch Snow in the face for a new reason.  
@N7: Hope is an honorable mention. I do want to punch him in the face, but he's only 14.
#5 Posted by Video_Game_King (36087 posts) -

He gets better. Also, the game gets better, if you're gonna pull that card. (FF13 is the one game from last year that I'll defend the hell out of.)

#6 Posted by InfiniteGeass (2051 posts) -

Dude whatever, I really liked Snow.

#7 Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -
@Video_Game_King: I won't pass judgement until I've finished the game. I am enjoying it up to this point, though. Yes, it's "Linear: The Game" but that hasn't stopped me from enjoying it.
#8 Posted by Video_Game_King (36087 posts) -

Same here. Just wait until you're riding a robot for absolutely no reason. It's awesome.

#9 Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -
@Video_Game_King: It was dumb of me to look at the spoiler, but not dumb because I've already done that. It was pretty awesome.
#10 Posted by Video_Game_King (36087 posts) -

Oh, you've already hit that part? Well, it continues being awesome from there. Three words: worst birthday ever.

#11 Posted by Lunar_Aura (2779 posts) -

I should have known all the characters were going to be from Final Fantasy lol

#12 Posted by WatanabeKazuma (989 posts) -

Yep, Snow was a dick, but that was sort of the point.

@Video_Game_King said:

How far have you played into Final Fantasy XIII? Because he eventually realizes how much he sucks and takes steps to remedy that.

This, its all part of the arc. Just like how Lightning gradually mellows, as does Cloud in VII but people tend to stick to the broad strokes and instead paint them as forever sullen.

#13 Posted by GlenTennis (3144 posts) -

I notice something in common with these characters...

#14 Posted by joey (980 posts) -

@GlenTennis said:

I notice something in common with these characters...

Blonde hair?

#15 Posted by Icicle7x3 (1174 posts) -

I liked Snow.

#16 Posted by artgarcrunkle (970 posts) -

"Zell is the lamest jock character..."

How lame and typical, I guess anime really is for jerks.

#17 Posted by Mento (2443 posts) -

@GlenTennis: They all look like ladies?

Moderator Online
#18 Posted by AwesomeAquaman (164 posts) -

I hate FF characters, they all look like girls and they're all emo.

#19 Posted by DAFTPUNK (1213 posts) -

they are not bad at all.

#20 Posted by Hailinel (23957 posts) -

Shouldn't this be titled Top 5 Final Fantasy characters you want to punch in the jaw?

Online
#21 Posted by Gabriel (4055 posts) -

Don't know who I would want to punch more Efiniment Final Fantasy characters, or Rico.

#22 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -

Japanese games have shitty, annoying characters, I get it.

#23 Posted by desperado_ (39 posts) -

I'm proud to say that I don't know who any of these characters are, or where they come from...

#24 Posted by Sweep (8826 posts) -

Any character from a sonic game that isn't sonic?

Moderator
#25 Posted by PeasantAbuse (5138 posts) -

@Sweep said:

Any character from a sonic game that isn't sonic?

You don't like Dr. Eggman? He's got a cute nose.

#26 Edited by MiniPato (2721 posts) -

You either haven't played many games or you have a very high tolerance for truly annoying characters and low tolerance for moderately annoying characters. Snow makes the list as one of the better, least face punchable characters in FFXIII. Personally I want to punch Hope (who cares if he's a kid! Remember Little Lamplight in Fallout 3?) and Lightning. Sure, blame Snow for your mom's death and not the big ass ship that shot rockets at her. Lightning is a big 'ol B and she only stops being an ice queen when she has the stupidest epiphany in the world in a goddamn sewer. Not only are they dicks on their own, when put together, they encourage each other's dickish attitudes.

I hate that fat spoiled prince motherfucker from Dragon Quest 8. The true ending for that game is the shit because you get to humiliate him in the best possible way.

I also hate that fat guy in F.E.A.R.

And just based on the quick look, the whiny useless piece of baggage that is the glasses guy in Telltale's Jurassic Park game. You know he's gonna die, but you still say to yourself "God I hope this son of a bitch dies!" His sole purpose is to annoy because he sucks at everything else he's supposed to do like go undercover or aim a gun.

#27 Posted by Getz (2989 posts) -

Yeah, so they're all Final Fantasy characters? You're really tapping the well dry.

#28 Posted by Jay444111 (2441 posts) -

Great, ANOTHER FF hater, those are new!

I agree with most except for Tidus and Snow because they had actual character development overall and are enjoyable characters. To bad I am the only one in the world that knows what character development it!

#29 Posted by President_Barackbar (3439 posts) -

@Hailinel said:

Shouldn't this be titled Top 5 Final Fantasy characters you want to punch in the jaw?

I can't think of a series with more jaw-punchable characters than FF.

#30 Posted by ImHungry (376 posts) -

I feel like it speaks well of the Final Fantasy series' character development that they have the ability to make you feel so strongly of them, even negatively.

#31 Posted by Hailinel (23957 posts) -

@President_Barackbar said:

@Hailinel said:

Shouldn't this be titled Top 5 Final Fantasy characters you want to punch in the jaw?

I can't think of a series with more jaw-punchable characters than FF.

Sonic the Hedgehog.

Online
#32 Posted by DjCmeP (1148 posts) -

Stop playing dumb Japanese games..

Fuck this guy!
#33 Edited by Still_I_Cry (2494 posts) -

I have never had to experience the special emotions these characters bring out in people.

There have been characters I want to punch but I forgot who they were/are.

I feel I am obligated now to insert an expletive to express my frustration with not being able to remember the names..so..

Shit.

#34 Posted by President_Barackbar (3439 posts) -

@Hailinel said:

@President_Barackbar said:

@Hailinel said:

Shouldn't this be titled Top 5 Final Fantasy characters you want to punch in the jaw?

I can't think of a series with more jaw-punchable characters than FF.

Sonic the Hedgehog.

Good point.

#35 Posted by Vexxan (4616 posts) -
@BoG: I'd totally love to punch Snow in the face. Hope too.  
 
They're both what's bad with FFXIII.
#37 Posted by bombHills (632 posts) -

I have never played any FF but they look like they need a punch in the face, and/or, junk.

#38 Posted by usgrovers (166 posts) -

I would punch the Prince from Prince of Persia: Warrior Within

#39 Posted by TheGreatGuero (9130 posts) -

I, too, would like to punch many Square characters in the jaw.

#40 Posted by Little_Socrates (5675 posts) -
#41 Posted by dirtyharry (60 posts) -

Everyone in Too Human.

#42 Posted by MikkaQ (10269 posts) -

While I agree I want to punch most post-VII Final Fantasy characters (that is to say anything from the creative black hole that is Nomura) in the jaw, I think this list needs some variety.

Where's Brucie Kibbutz? Where's Dante? Slippy? Tails? Navi? Tingle? Sinistar...? COME ON!

#43 Edited by McGhee (6094 posts) -

No way, Zell us super badass, and Tidus had one of the best endings in any game ever.

#44 Posted by imsh_pl (3295 posts) -

HEY! LISTEN!

#45 Posted by BoG (5185 posts) -
@Jay444111: I'm not an FF hater, I'm a big fan of the series.  I'm just fully aware of how annoying some of the characters are. Maybe you disagree about Snow or Tidus, but I think Edward is universally annoying.  
@Sweep: Actually, I'd like to punch Sonic sometimes, too. 
#46 Posted by WickedFather (1730 posts) -

Tingle.

That bint from Assassin's Creed 2 who says "Have you come to look at the booook?"

That kid with the big string of snot in Windwaker.

Sheva when you're fighting the very last boss in RE5 and all she does is get in the fucking way.

Skittles.

#47 Posted by TaliciaDragonsong (8698 posts) -

Too much FF in there, but I agree, cus I wanna punch the entire franchise till it stops being lame.