I guess for all of you who have little space next to the TV you dreams of puting the Xbox One vertically are over. I just saw this on a few outlets, but I guess Game Spot UK broke teh story.
This is what I imagine is going on in the Development teams head...(w/ thanks to SUICIDAL TENDENCIES)
...Sometimes we try to do things at the Xbox Develpment group, but it just doesn't work out the way we want it to. Maybe, we get real frustrated and then like we try hard to do it, and we like, take our time but it just doesn't work out the way we want it to. It's like we try to explain ourselves real hard, but it just doesn't work out. And everything we do and everything we try, it never turns out.
It's like, we needed time after e3 to figure these things out, but there's always someone there going “hey Xbox Dev Group, you know we've been noticing you've been having a lot of problems lately, you know? You need to maybe get away. And like, maybe you should talk about it, you'll feel a lot better.”
And we're all like “oh, nah, it's ok, you know. We'll figure it out. Just leave us alone, I'll figure it out, you know? We just working on it by ourselves.”
And they go “well, you know, if you wanna talk about it, I'll be here, you know? And you'll probably feel a lot better if you talk about it. So why don't you talk about it?”
We at the Xbox Dev Group go “no, we don't want to! We're ok. We'll figure it out ourself!” But they just keep bugging us, they just keep bugging us, and it builds up inside.
We were in our Redmond, WA boardroom and we were just like staring at the wall thinking about everything, but then again we was thinking about nothing. And then CEO Steve Ballmer came in, and we didn't even know he was there.
He called our names and we didn't hear him and then he started screaming “Xbox Dev Group, XBOX DEVELOPMENT GROUP!”
And we go “what? What's the matter?”
He goes “what's the matter with you?”
We go “there's nothing wrong, Steve.”
He's all “Don't tell me that! You're all on drugs!”
We go “No Steve, we're not on drugs. We're ok, We're just thinking, you know? Why don't you get us a Pepsi?”
He goes “No! You're on drugs!”
We go “Steve, we're ok. We're just thinking.”
He goes “No! You're not thinking, you're on drugs! Normal development groups don't be acting that way!”
We go “Steve, just get us a Pepsi! Please, all I want is a Pepsi!” And he wouldn't give it to us! All we wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi for 30 people, and he wouldn't give it to us! Just a Pepsi!
We're not crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!
Sony's the one who's crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!
Public's driving us crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!
Doesn't matter, We'll probably get hit by a car anyways.