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Avatar image for mike
#1 Posted by Mike (16905 posts) -

Hello Giant Bomb community! Here we go again in the long-running Things You've Learned series! We've been doing this for years, let's keep it going with Grand Theft Auto V!

Remember, please do not post any spoilers, and try to keep the numbering consecutive if at all possible...it'll save me a ton of work. Also, try to read through the thread before replying and avoid posting duplicates, those will be deleted eventually. If you've never played before, check out some of the previous threads so you can get an idea of how it's done. I'll start!

1) Carrying a concealed minigun and 10,000 rounds of ammunition is no problem!

Check out some of the previous Things You've Learned™:

Moderator
Avatar image for jking47
#2 Edited by jking47 (1285 posts) -

2) Pressing jump then punch=hours of entertainment.

Avatar image for dfl017
#3 Posted by DFL017 (311 posts) -

3) I never want to have children.

Avatar image for marino
#4 Posted by Marino (6116 posts) -

4) I'll do several despicable things for bouncy bouncy.

Staff
Avatar image for chaser324
#5 Posted by Chaser324 (7822 posts) -

5) Good hygiene and interpersonal skills are not a requirement for becoming a successful entrepreneur.

Moderator
Avatar image for samfo
#6 Edited by SamFo (1647 posts) -

X) Moderator Edit - I consider this a spoiler. Not cool!

Avatar image for grulet
#7 Edited by Grulet (2434 posts) -

6) It might just be me, but playing Trevor seems to increase your chances to get into a random violent situation with about 200% (and that's not counting anything story/side-mission related).

Avatar image for justin258
#8 Posted by Justin258 (13889 posts) -

7) Face-planting into fence posts and buildings is fun.

8) Hitting a pole while driving a 4-wheeler is deadly, but being flung out of a car moving at extremely high speeds is A-OK.

Avatar image for mike
#9 Edited by Mike (16905 posts) -

9) The Los Santos Police Department has the most intuitive investigators. If a criminal sets off a remote explosion, all police officers in the area immediately know who did it and the suspect's exact location.

Moderator
Avatar image for claude
#10 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -

10) Los Santos will never host a PGA Tour event with a nine hole golf course.

Avatar image for misterbananafoam
#12 Posted by MisterBananaFoam (92 posts) -

11) Cops will never check the windows in their cars.

12) It's perfectly acceptable to call your opponent a 'cocksucker' during a friendly game of tennis.

Avatar image for cloudleet
#13 Posted by Cloudleet (187 posts) -

13) If a crazed gunman is firing at the police, never try to help the police by beating up the crazed gunman.

Avatar image for hirokedyn
#14 Posted by HiroKedyn (33 posts) -

14) Always carry a Jerry can with you. You never know when you will need to light something on fire.

Avatar image for mintyice
#16 Edited by mintyice (251 posts) -

15) It's totally possible to take 90 degree turns at top speed and not spin out

Avatar image for irvandus
#17 Posted by Irvandus (3170 posts) -

16) Gangsters have are able to drive using magic.

Avatar image for mike
#18 Edited by Mike (16905 posts) -

17. You can easily control the pitch and yaw of any airborne vehicle while you're jumping big ass ramps.

Moderator
Avatar image for nightriff
#19 Posted by Nightriff (6929 posts) -

18) Flying is still garbage, avoid at all costs

Avatar image for sackmanjones
#20 Posted by Sackmanjones (5315 posts) -

19) If a creepy old guy wants a drink of your beer, give it to him.

Avatar image for oneandonlybige
#21 Posted by OneAndOnlyBigE (472 posts) -

20) The people of Los Santos are very protective of their personal space.

Avatar image for shivermetimbers
#22 Posted by shivermetimbers (1181 posts) -

21) You can kill an infinite amount of cops and civilians, destroy billions in property, get wasted ("killed"), respawn in the hospital, and have no criminal record.

Avatar image for hbkdx12
#23 Edited by hbkdx12 (800 posts) -

22) it's perfectly normal for you to get a private lap dance where the curtain is wide open and the bouncer watches you in 5-10 second intervals

Avatar image for marino
#24 Posted by Marino (6116 posts) -

23) Whether you are the owner of the local biker bar or not, the bikers will not tolerate you hanging out there.

Staff
Avatar image for delorean99947
#25 Edited by delorean99947 (267 posts) -

24) Collecting 30 sub-marine parts for a crazy lady yields almost no reward. Don't always expect a big pay off for a hard days work.

Avatar image for pr1mus
#27 Edited by Pr1mus (4158 posts) -

26) Putting on your helmet will save your life on a bike.

Avatar image for buneroid
#28 Posted by Buneroid (454 posts) -

27) If you see someone steal an old lady's money on the sidewalk, RUN THAT FUCKER DOWN!

Avatar image for claude
#29 Posted by Claude (16648 posts) -

28) Motorcycle helmets are disposable.

Avatar image for legend
#30 Posted by Legend (2713 posts) -

29) If you get arrested in Los Santos, the police will only take your ammo and let you keep all your weapons including your RPG, minigun and grenade launcher.

Avatar image for blomakrans
#31 Edited by Blomakrans (161 posts) -

30) In Los Santos and surrounding areas people aren't concerned about paying too much for a taxi. Some will even take a taxi from downtown Los Santos to the other side of the map.

Avatar image for ikilledthedj
#32 Posted by ikilledthedj (402 posts) -

31) buying a brand new car in Los santos does not guarantee it will be in your garage the next day

32) No one takes the bus to work

Avatar image for stealthmaster86
#33 Edited by Stealthmaster86 (737 posts) -

33. The Police will not take responsibility if they crash into you. They will chase you down instead.

Avatar image for bigjeffrey
#34 Posted by bigjeffrey (5282 posts) -

34) You can hide in the bushes (Trees) when cops are looking for you.

Avatar image for dfl017
#35 Posted by DFL017 (311 posts) -

35) The GPS is your friend in the city, but in the country just go straight.

Avatar image for hailinel
#36 Posted by Hailinel (25787 posts) -

36) Some dudes are very touchy about being Canadian.

Avatar image for connerthekewlkid
#37 Posted by connerthekewlkid (1873 posts) -

37) You don't have to like it because the hood doesn't love it.

Avatar image for sessh
#38 Posted by Sessh (2857 posts) -

38) Horse tranquillizers can give you the trip of a lifetime.

Avatar image for i_stay_puft
#39 Edited by I_Stay_Puft (5531 posts) -

39) The cashiers are cool.

Avatar image for supermonkey122
#40 Posted by supermonkey122 (1156 posts) -

40.) Time slows down when changing the radio station in your car.

Avatar image for lord_xp
#41 Posted by Lord_Xp (648 posts) -

41.) Don't stand near cops. They'll shoot you for trespassing their personal space

Avatar image for capum15
#42 Posted by Capum15 (5548 posts) -

@lord_xp said:

41.) Don't stand near cops. They'll shoot you for trespassing their personal space

41.5) Guards will also sic their dogs on you, before shooting you immediately without warning.

Avatar image for greggd
#43 Posted by GreggD (4595 posts) -

42.) No matter how much armor you slap onto a vehicle, flip onto your front end down a mountain at top speed, and your ass is grass.

Avatar image for mike
#44 Posted by Mike (16905 posts) -

43. If you already own a particular suit or shirt but forgot yours at home, just pop in to the shop that sells it and take another one for free. It's totally fine, and the clerk will even thank you for coming in.

Moderator
Avatar image for chrismafuchris
#45 Posted by chrismafuchris (1154 posts) -

44. Hedges are made of the strongest material known to man

Avatar image for jerseyscum
#46 Posted by jerseyscum (1187 posts) -

45. Don't call Trevor a hipster. Seriously, don't do it.

Avatar image for bigboss1911
#47 Edited by BigBoss1911 (2778 posts) -

46. People who live in Southern Cali are 3 beer queers.

Avatar image for flappy
#48 Posted by Flappy (2414 posts) -

47. When given the task to plan an escape route, always make sure to get the right vehicle for the job.

Avatar image for bigjeffrey
#49 Edited by bigjeffrey (5282 posts) -

48) Don't trespass on military bases.

Avatar image for gladiator_games
#50 Edited by Gladiator_Games (536 posts) -

49. Taxi companies dont mind random dudes calling in "lookin for work"