I have save games for about 30 different games sitting on my computer at this present point in time, but I have absolutely no ambition to play any of them.
Do you ever have that feeling? What contributes to it? In looking at why this has occurred, I can point to obvious things:
- I'm now in a relationship that has lasted a full year (longest one ever, and she's a hell of a keeper)
- My work schedule doesn't allow for a lot of free time, and when I do have free time, I want to spend it doing things that don't involve video games
- I have too many hobbies vying for my time: video games, Heroclix, Magic The Gathering, movie watching, writing
When it comes down to it, my other hobbies take up much of the time I could use to play video games, but even when I DO play games, I find myself only focusing on two of them: Warframe and League of Legends. The former is really due to the cooperative nature with the fantastic Giant Bomb community as well as just generally enjoying loot grind games. The latter is a bit more personal: I'm a very competitive person, and League fuels that competitive nature for me. There's also the bonus that most of my friends play the game, so it also fuels my cooperative needs.
Nonetheless, I've recently fallen into this place where I want to not just be competitive, but I would like to EXCEL at that competition. I'm playing in Friday Night Magic and trying to ramp up towards going to Pro Tour Qualifiers, big events, and plus I just genuinely like deck-building. With Heroclix, I have a goal of going to the World Championships at Gen Con next year. I can't do that without focus and making sure that I'm pushing myself to be better and wittier.
So these games...they sit...and they wait. This gaming PC that I built and filled with games, it sits alone in the computer room, rarely being turned on. When it is, I just stare at the list of games...digging for something to bide my time and captivate me, but nothing does. Little five minute spurts of gaming take place, yet not a single one can pull my attention from these other things.
Is it because of my work environment? Is it because I literally see video games every day, all day, until my eyes are ready to bleed? I started playing Call of Duty: Ghosts, mainly just to check it out. I like the multiplayer, as it feels like they brought it back to that COD4/MW2/Black Ops 1 vibe that I loved. However, will I continue with it? Is it just something to kill the time? Hell, the only time I really even get to play video games anymore is when I'm waiting for my girlfriend to get off work so I can go pick her up. Beyond that, it's deck-building, team-building, and just doing whatever I can to keep myself busy.
Maybe that's the problem. Maybe I'm trying to find things to keep myself busy rather than finding things that I genuinely want to do. Maybe there isn't a game right now that can grasp my interests by the balls, carry me along for the ride, and then somehow magically make my balls not feel like they were stretched for a million miles.
So I sit here...shuffling my green devo deck...test running my hands...and I just keep thinking the same question every single time:
Am I just tired of video games? Did I finally outgrow them?
Thanks for reading my selfish and egocentric thoughts. I just needed to actually write something to see it all in print.
Until next time, piece.