Posted by Cartographer (84 posts) -

I hate to be the one who starts a discussion on religion, nor do I want to start an ongoing debate about it but I'm a nerd and when no one else will listen isnt your computer and your network friends who you turn to? 
 
My sister was a few weeks pregnant and she miscarried today. She's not the first person I know that this has happened to. A few months ago my grandmother passed away at the hospital where she was being treated. And a year ago, a high school friend died of cancer
 
I dont deal with death well. When people pass away it frustrates me. Theres no logic to death, only life and what we make of it. Theres no god or heaven or hell. No ones tomorrow is promised 

#1 Posted by Cartographer (84 posts) -

I hate to be the one who starts a discussion on religion, nor do I want to start an ongoing debate about it but I'm a nerd and when no one else will listen isnt your computer and your network friends who you turn to? 
 
My sister was a few weeks pregnant and she miscarried today. She's not the first person I know that this has happened to. A few months ago my grandmother passed away at the hospital where she was being treated. And a year ago, a high school friend died of cancer
 
I dont deal with death well. When people pass away it frustrates me. Theres no logic to death, only life and what we make of it. Theres no god or heaven or hell. No ones tomorrow is promised 

#2 Posted by JB16 (745 posts) -

Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.

#3 Posted by ttocs (783 posts) -

Death is natural. It's the one thing everything on this planet has in common. As an agnostic, I don't know what happens when we die. I'm sure it's a lot like before we were born. I can't remember that so I probably won't be conscious of death. This just teaches us to live for the present and enjoy every second we are alive on this earth and never take things for granted. The hedonistic creed is a good one, "eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die"

#4 Posted by iam3green (14390 posts) -

o well that sucks. it's true, death sucks, it can hurt other people. it hurts people that are close to them also.

#5 Posted by DillonWerner (1520 posts) -
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
#6 Posted by MoonlightMoth (479 posts) -

If it is any consolation, you should read the opening lines to Richard Dawkins book "Unweaving the Rainbow".

#7 Posted by Scooper (7881 posts) -
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
#8 Edited by JEC03 (919 posts) -

It's sucks bad to lose someone nothing worse in the world but who knows IF there is a after life maybe its awesome with no problems and we can be in peace and be happy forever I know that's wishful thinking.

#9 Posted by Vinny_Says (5721 posts) -
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
#10 Posted by officervanhalen (86 posts) -
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I'm Spartacus.
#11 Posted by Apparatus_Unearth (3253 posts) -

I thought this was gonna be about the band. Meh. :(

#12 Posted by CptBedlam (4460 posts) -
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
#13 Posted by DillonWerner (1520 posts) -
@CptBedlam said:
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I have many religious friends who believe in an afterlife and are scared of death and fear it, but as an atheist I could care less about death it doesn't bother me at all. 
#14 Posted by rmanthorp (4064 posts) -
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Nor I.
Moderator
#15 Posted by McGhee (6075 posts) -

As a former hardcore Christian who is now an atheist, I can tell you that the fear of possibly going to hell is FAR greater than any fear of non-existence after death.

#16 Posted by McBEEF (360 posts) -

Death is always hard but you learn that it is part of life in a way. My aunt miscarriaged and an ex-girlfriend of mine died of cancer, its tough but youll get through it.
 Its better to live life happy, and remember a persons best moments than fear some sort of judgement after your death, but I can see why fear of going to hell or something can help people live better lives.  
As an atheist I dont believe in an afterlife so i enjoy my  time even more because its limited.
 
I deal with death quite a bit on my uni course in  Forensics so maybe im jsut a bit de-sensitized.

#17 Posted by Sin4profit (3003 posts) -

@Cartographer: Best not to think of death as forever lost. Better to think of it as the opportunity to "live more".

Whether you believe in souls (whether they look back at those they've known) or not, think of death as the opportunity to inherit and move forward on the inspirations that those who have died gave to you. In a way, think of it as inheriting their dreams and goals and use that to fulfill your life more and to fulfill their dreams in honor of them.

Better to use the dead as a guide then it is to use them as a crutch

As an Agnostic i dunno that i'm explaining that very well..but, there ya go.

#18 Posted by BraveToaster (12588 posts) -

None of us will know for sure until we're dead.

#19 Posted by CaLe (4058 posts) -

Sometimes I want to be dead but I don't want to go through the process of death. Those last few moments seem like the only scary thing about death, the rest doesn't matter.

#20 Edited by Aronman789 (2671 posts) -

As a person that suffers from anxiety and depression, I don't know what to make of death. On one side, I don't like the idea of disappearing and not being able to control what happens to my memory, but on the other, not being constantly haunted by everything bad you've ever done would be really fucking nice. I still remember things I've done years ago clear as day.

#21 Edited by Thrillhouse87 (247 posts) -

I really think there MUST be more to life than a series of coincidences of assembled atoms and molecules that just HAPPENS to form something as perfect and advanced as LIFE. And just think about the math of how unlikely your existence is if you only get one life and if its all a coincidence. How unlikely was it that all of your ancestors should be born and meet each other so you could be born? And how every detail in all of their lifes and the life of those around them determined the outcome of their legacy. A series of "one-in-a-million" odds happening billions of times In all the billions of years our world has existed. And you can even go further back than that, how unlikely was it that our planet should be "born"? 

#22 Posted by PrivateIronTFU (3874 posts) -

The way I see it. You can't escape it, so you might as well embrace it. And I have a life to live, so I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. I was perfectly content before I was born, and I imagine death will treat me the same way.

#23 Posted by ConstantRa1n (293 posts) -

DEATH was a great band!

#24 Posted by TommyK (45 posts) -
@Aronman789: I can co-sign that, I have a consience that is very heavy because of things I have done in my past and The best thing about dying for me is getting rid of all that and just resting in peace, I don't want to believe in an afterlife, if thier is one then I'll just spend eternity dwelling on how I could've lived it a better life.
#25 Posted by AlisterCat (5736 posts) -

My best friend died last year. I sat in a hospital room watching him die for about a month. It only got harder. He didn't go anywhere, he just died. I still leave him messages on his Facebook from time to time to make it easier, but it's a much better crutch than believing he went to heaven.

#26 Edited by Abram03 (36 posts) -
@Thrillhouse87 said:

I really think there MUST be more to life than a series of coincidences of assembled atoms and molecules that just HAPPENS to form something as perfect and advanced as LIFE. And just think about the math of how unlikely your existence is if you only get one life and if its all a coincidence. How unlikely was it that all of your ancestors should be born and meet each other so you could be born? And how every detail in all of their lifes and the life of those around them determined the outcome of their legacy. A series of "one-in-a-million" odds happening billions of times In all the billions of years our world has existed. And you can even go further back than that, how unlikely was it that our planet should be "born"? 

Finally, somebody said it!  Yeah, to say that evolution is due to accidental but beneficial mutations occurring hundreds of millions of times without too much genetic junk in the spaces between, thereby lending an oftentimes necessary survival skill just in the nick, is BULLSHIT.  Yes, natural selection plays some part, but neither it nor accidental mutation can account for bugs that look exactly like leaves or sea creatures that eat the stinging nematocytes off of jellyfish and turn them to their own advantage, not to mention birds that have beaks specially shaped for their dietary needs.  Many of these features are necessary.  Yet the hypothesized accidental mutations occurred very, very slowly.  Surely, all the little funny creatures would've died out by the time the accidental mutations produced a feature that was actually useful?
 
I'm not a Christian.  The Yin (the physical world) is cruel, and the shape that the Yang (that is, life) must take within it is often cruel.  However, there is more to life than accident and death; life has a great big carrot dangling in front of it, mostly unseen to all us constituent particles, but clear and tasty to life as aggregate, keeping it striving for something ever-greater, forever and ever. There is a purpose to life.  Even if you, OP, were to die today, it would not be in vain.
 
On a related note, I would like to recommend this excellent book on reincarnation from the University of Virginia's Personality Studies division:  LIFE BEFORE LIFE by Jim B. Tucker.  Talk about some hard-to-explain-away stuff.
#27 Posted by Mcfart (1730 posts) -

when i die i'll be reincarnated as a panda bear
 
 
a cute panda bear

#28 Posted by wecantgetaway (28 posts) -

Sorry for your losses. The best way I have found to combat fear of death is by spending as much time as possible with the ones you love, and less time focused on the superficial things in life. 

#29 Posted by Toms115 (2317 posts) -

i don't remember not existing so i'm sure being dead will be a blast, but the process of dying itself fucking sucks.

#30 Posted by phish09 (1110 posts) -
@CptBedlam said:
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I think that science also points to an afterlife if you are willing to get into the whole quantum physics argument.  Namely that we are all made of energy, and every thing is made of energy and that energy can not be created or destroyed, but merely transfered from one "body" to another.  I'm not saying that science points to reincarnation as such, but moreso that it confirms that at our most basic level we exist on the same plane as the trees and the sky and the oceans, and once we die we are just kind of part of that again, or as much a part of that as we were when we were living.  You may define yourself as an individual by your consciousness, and it would be pretty hard to live a normal life if you didn't, but we are still just matter and energy and that matter and energy will exist long after your consciousness ceases too.  So, basically, what I'm saying is that, if you believe science to be true, you must in turn believe in an afterlife, religious or not...and I am not one for religion.
#31 Posted by DillonWerner (1520 posts) -
@phish09 said:
@CptBedlam said:
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I think that science also points to an afterlife if you are willing to get into the whole quantum physics argument.  Namely that we are all made of energy, and every thing is made of energy and that energy can not be created or destroyed, but merely transfered from one "body" to another.  I'm not saying that science points to reincarnation as such, but moreso that it confirms that at our most basic level we exist on the same plane as the trees and the sky and the oceans, and once we die we are just kind of part of that again, or as much a part of that as we were when we were living.  You may define yourself as an individual by your consciousness, and it would be pretty hard to live a normal life if you didn't, but we are still just matter and energy and that matter and energy will exist long after your consciousness ceases too.  So, basically, what I'm saying is that, if you believe science to be true, you must in turn believe in an afterlife, religious or not...and I am not one for religion.
  
#32 Posted by KillyDarko (1888 posts) -
@DillonWerner said:
@CptBedlam said:
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I have many religious friends who believe in an afterlife and are scared of death and fear it, but as an atheist I could care less about death it doesn't bother me at all. 
Most religious people I know are actually way more scared of dying than most atheists I know... me included. I'm not scared of dying at all.
#33 Posted by Scooper (7881 posts) -
@DillonWerner said:
@phish09 said:
@CptBedlam said:
@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I think that science also points to an afterlife if you are willing to get into the whole quantum physics argument.  Namely that we are all made of energy, and every thing is made of energy and that energy can not be created or destroyed, but merely transfered from one "body" to another.  I'm not saying that science points to reincarnation as such, but moreso that it confirms that at our most basic level we exist on the same plane as the trees and the sky and the oceans, and once we die we are just kind of part of that again, or as much a part of that as we were when we were living.  You may define yourself as an individual by your consciousness, and it would be pretty hard to live a normal life if you didn't, but we are still just matter and energy and that matter and energy will exist long after your consciousness ceases too.  So, basically, what I'm saying is that, if you believe science to be true, you must in turn believe in an afterlife, religious or not...and I am not one for religion.
  
  
#34 Posted by natetodamax (19220 posts) -

"I was dead for millions of years before my birth and it never inconvenienced me one bit." - Mark Twain

#35 Edited by CptBedlam (4460 posts) -
@phish09 said:

@CptBedlam said:

@blacklabeldomm said:
@Scooper said:
@DillonWerner said:
@JB16 said:
Your last paragraph is depressing but true. Death hits atheist harder than most because we don't believe in an afterlife.
I don't agree with your last point.
Neither do I.
Neither do I.
I do. Religious thoughts on death and afterlife are consolation above everything else.
I think that science also points to an afterlife if you are willing to get into the whole quantum physics argument.  Namely that we are all made of energy, and every thing is made of energy and that energy can not be created or destroyed, but merely transfered from one "body" to another.  I'm not saying that science points to reincarnation as such, but moreso that it confirms that at our most basic level we exist on the same plane as the trees and the sky and the oceans, and once we die we are just kind of part of that again, or as much a part of that as we were when we were living.  You may define yourself as an individual by your consciousness, and it would be pretty hard to live a normal life if you didn't, but we are still just matter and energy and that matter and energy will exist long after your consciousness ceases too.  So, basically, what I'm saying is that, if you believe science to be true, you must in turn believe in an afterlife, religious or not...and I am not one for religion.
I strongly disagree. The analogy is false.
 
Made of matter does not equal "afterlife"; the latter term clearly implies the existence of a consciousness connected to you after death.
 
In science terms, your consiousness is nothing but a bunch of chemical reactions that end with death. Nothing of the consciousness after death is left to live on in whatever way or to be transferred into another organism etc. If you want to call roots, funguses etc that'll grow out of my rotten corpse's minerals one day "afterlife", then go ahead. But it's not the sense of the term that is discussed here.
#36 Edited by Brendan (8174 posts) -

Steve Jobs had a really good quote about death when a reporter asked him about it during his news worthy health period. I can't remember it well, but it was something like "Death is the last and greatest tool for growth." I don't think death is senseless. Death is necessary, whether it comes unfairly to some or not. What you're going through sucks though man, I'm sorry to hear about it.

Edit: Found it:

And that is as it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It’s life’s change agent; it clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now, the new is you. But someday, not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it’s quite true.
#37 Posted by MisfitToy (139 posts) -

I'll jump in on this. Why not. I am a Christian but I have several atheist/agnostic friends... so at ease.

First off, I am sorry for your losses. A couple of years ago I had experienced a series of losses around me so I understand that you can start to that WTF feeling. Introspection is totally healthy and asking questions about life is also really good. Take a walk through a nursing home and you can get the reality check that we all die at some point in time. It is an inevitability not an option.

There really are two parts when thinking about death. What do I think about (deal with) the death of others, and what do I think about my own death? Beliefs aside the most that any person can do is put the simple fact into perspective - I'm still alive. What do I do with my life? Actually, I think Gandalf said it best when he told Frodo, "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."

I actually really appreciate when I stop to think about death because it puts things into a real perspective. I want to do this, this, this and this with my life. I better get off my butt and do it. Or maybe take a little more risk. Why not travel? Why not ask that person out? Why not learn how to ski? The answer to that last one is because I don't like cold snowy mountains and I'm apparently not that coordinated. Once was enough.

But you get my point. The idea is to take a totally sucky situation and turn it into a positive. Grandma is gone but I am still here. What am I going to do with my life? If we don't have moments like those now and again we become complacent, stagnant, and bored.

Keep and cherish the memories you have with the person you lost. Allow yourself some time to grieve. But also make sure you focus on yourself as well. And that is WAY more deep than anything I've written on GiantBomb before but I suppose it is good to talk about something other than games now and again.

#38 Posted by tunaburn (1891 posts) -
@CaLe said:

Sometimes I want to be dead but I don't want to go through the process of death. Those last few moments seem like the only scary thing about death, the rest doesn't matter.

#39 Posted by Levio (1786 posts) -

When people fall asleep, they wake up as their dreamself in another universe known as the Dream Universe.

When they die, they just become their dream self permanently.

Why do people get so melodramatic over this?

#40 Posted by TheGreatGuero (9130 posts) -

Straight up, I'd rather go to Hell forever than to cease existing. I'm an athiest, and yeah, I'm pretty terrified of death. I can't deny it.

#41 Posted by lavaman77 (565 posts) -
@McGhee_the_Insomniac said:

As a former hardcore Christian who is now an atheist, I can tell you that the fear of possibly going to hell is FAR greater than any fear of non-existence after death.

This, being burned forever experiencing so much pain that you wish that you don't exist scares the crap out of me.  im not an atheist though and have been trying to be a good person doing as much good deeds as possible.
#42 Edited by TheDudeOfGaming (6078 posts) -

I started hating death after my grandfather died.  Also,might i add, If God doesn't exist, therefore the afterlife won't exist,so neither will you, so don't worry about it. And if God does exist, well...I'm fucked.

#43 Posted by Gerhabio (1977 posts) -

Lots of my classmates are now dead, and two women on my life have miscarried before as well. As another coincidence, my grandmother died from mistreatment as well and the other one of depression.

When I think about people I love dying it scares me but you simply have to keep on living, remember those you lost with affection and live for them. It's just how it is; it is the human condition.

#44 Posted by LordXavierBritish (6320 posts) -

You know normally I hold strong policy against venting any of my real opinions on the internet, and especially internet forums about video games, but I'm never going to fucking say this anywhere else and I've been making a lot of really great bad decisions today so what the fuck.
 
I'd say that on the whole, consciousness is probably the single worst thing that ever happened to organic life, and really everything. As many nice things as we've gotten out of the deal, it's pretty much the single root cause of every problem the universe as ever had, ever. And why is that? It's because we took all the universe had to offer and said no, I exist therefore I deserve more. I not only deserve life, I deserve an eternal life. Not only that, I deserve to live an extraordinary life, a life filled with only that which I desire and a life that shall be remembered for all time. I deserve to have a life that means something, even if it is a meaning without purpose. I deserve more.
 
You know, there were no problems before we decided that being inconvenienced with life was an issue, the concept of a problem didn't exist.
 
Just look at it all, everything we've created: art, politics, religion. It's all just some desperate grab at something that isn't there, something that was never there. Meaning. We think that because we are aware that there must be more to life, that we are important enough to have an impact on anything just because we know we are here. The sense of entitlement we feel is fucking incredible.
 
And you know what the real fucking kicker is? Death. Death is a fucking joke. For some reason we feel we don't deserve death, as if we are somehow better than all other life in the universe. Somehow we are above the laws of existence because we shit in a bowl and think shiny things are nice. And the funniest part? It's just fear. It's just some childish fear of the unknown, of not being able to comprehend the concept of nonexistence, of not being able to control our own fates. We can never understand it, no matter how far we advance in any scientific field we will never know what it is like to not exist, because you can't exist and really know. And why is that so bad? Because we have to know everything, we have to plan everything. All that matters is us, if nature gets in the way we just fuck it over. We have actually created a society that thinks a lifetime of incarceration is a better fate than not existing, than not feeling anything. Being almost entirely cut off from all the pleasures of life, and just being there; that is somehow better. There are many people who even that think an eternal suffering would be superior to nothing. What kind of lunacy is that?
 
At the end of the day, it's just better not to bother with it all. You have to accept life for what it is, both your own and the lives of those around you. Trying to create some warped version of reality for yourself, some delusional fantasy in which you could have done more, where you'd have more time, you will have more time, is pointless. My advice, just say fuck it all and do what makes you happy, do what makes you feel good. You just have to live to live and enjoy it while it lasts.
 
Now I need sleep because I should never write this shit down ever.

#45 Posted by gamefreak9 (2420 posts) -

God... why do people even come outright and say they are Atheist like that... no offence but Atheism is the sign of a mediocre mind that only asks "how" instead of "why".  
 
Anw Death is hard, i know i cried like a baby at my grandfather's funeral... but then again, my whole family did, i honestly think it brought the rest of us closer. 

#46 Posted by MideonNViscera (2252 posts) -

When someone dies I just think about all the crap they hated in life, and how they won't have to deal with any of it ever again.

#47 Edited by S0ndor (2716 posts) -

As an atheist I neither care nor think about death. I will die, they will harvest my organs and burn the rest of me. I have much more pressing matters to consider, such as living my life.

#48 Posted by KillyDarko (1888 posts) -
@Cartographer: My deepest condolences, I sincerely hope your sister can recover from the trauma, and will keep her in my thoughts.
I've lost two girlfriends in the course of my life and things ever since have been well, really hard, so I think I can relate to the loss of a loved one... I'm not afraid of death myself, though.
#49 Edited by spazmaster666 (1993 posts) -

@lavaman77 said:

This, being burned forever experiencing so much pain that you wish that you don't exist scares the crap out of me. im not an atheist though and have been trying to be a good person doing as much good deeds as possible.

That's not really what hell is though. The image of fire and burning is often synonymous with the Christian concept of "hell" but in truth, "hell" simply refers to eternal separation from God. One could argue that if you consider God to be infinite, then hell would actually be complete nothingness (or what ever you would term separation from infinity).