Do you sit on toilet paper or toilet cover sheets?

I use two sheets, makes it a lot easier.

I use one layer of toilet paper, but usually I stand with my knees bent. Even at home. I always stand in public restrooms.

I want a squatting toilet. It's supposed to be easier, since it's the natural position.

If there are sheets, I'll use them. If not, maybe some toilet paper; though, it depends on the quality of restroom and its state of apparent cleanliness.

Regardless, I try to avoid public restrooms like the plague, which I might get in a public restroom.

Unless you have open wounds on your ass, both are just there for your peace of mind rather than any health benefit anyway, so use what you like, I guess. I'll wipe down a particularly bad toilet before sitting with a wad of paper, but there's not any actual health benefit even to that. Just don't make the mistake of thinking any bit of it matters one whit for sanitation. If you're really concerned about disease, every precaution and extra step taken while washing your hands is infinitely more useful.

I usually check how disgusting the toilets are before I make up my mind about using it. As long as there's not shit all over the walls then I am confident about sitting down without using something to cover my bum. Might wipe the seat if it's really wet, but otherwise I don't really mind.

I don't take a dump in public restrooms.

Yep, this is the solution.

If the place seems too disgusting for me to just sit my ass down, I'll hold it in before fiddling with balancing paper on the seat and what not. Otherwise, I'll go the "neither o_O" route.

I don't always use public toilets, but when I do, I put toilet paper on the seat before taking a dump.

Wipe seat -> put tp on seat -> put enough sheets of tp in the water (prevents splashing) -> shit.

This is how I not shit my pants in a public bathroom.

If seat is super filthy and I have to go: squat on seat -> shit.

Down to a science.

I actually got so into it I started using toilet covers on my regular seats. People seem to be weirded out by it, but I can only assume they're just jealous and can't admit it.

Sheets when they are available, otherwise it depends on how it looks. It seriously takes 2 seconds to use one of those sheets when you're familiar with them, so why not?

But I'm a guy. If I was a woman, I'd always use something. Women are horrible in public toilets, especially with their 'hover method.'

If I want to sit down on my own toilet I will do so without the aid of a barrier.

Anywhere else?

I've never heard of toilet cover sheets. Is that some weird dumb american thing?

It was actually invented by a Canadian mother tired of making toilet paper covers for her kids when they went to public restrooms. A considerate invention that caught on in many countries.

if possible I clean the toilet seat, if they have toilet seat cleaner next to the toilet. If not I don't care.

I can't remember it off the top of my head but there's been at least one independent study (and one on some TV-show... Bullshit? Mythbusters? I forget) that sort of conclusively stated that a seat won't give you bacteria. I mean, it's your buttcheeks. Unless they're covered in constant gashing wounds you probably won't catch anything. Even if they were, then the prior seater should've also had the same in order to actually, you know, inflict bacteria onto something. The ass skin isn't exactly the most bacteria-covered unlike fingers etc. So no, I don't use any of this stuff, nor have I ever seen those thin covers anywhere in Finland.

PS. The thing that I do kinda worry about is in public restrooms if they're downright filthy and I need to poop and then the poop sloshes some water up to my asshole. Which is a bit disgusting.

I perch barefoot on the seat and release.

You've come to the right place OP. There's only one thing I'm more opinionated on than games and that is toilets.

About 50% of the time the walls of public toilets are covered in stuff that is meant to be in the toilets. It's like a new layer of concrete. Who are these people whom are not even worthy of hell? It's usually only safe if the janitor has come to the rescue moments beforehand. When safe but of ill-repute, hover. If immaculate then sit after a precautionary swipe and a new layer of insulation. But if the situation resembles the more unpleasant 50% of my experience, I don't go near regardless of urgency. I haven't been too many times in public toilets TBH though, because I've been scarred for life.

Is it weird that I poop in the urinals?

@billymagnum: Only if you need people to watch you before you can release.

I usually will wipe off the toilet seat to make sure no...debris...is there, but those dumb paper covers are lame. I just sit right on the toilet seat. WHAT OF IT?

I haven't died or gotten AIDS yet so I'm sure it's fine.

Neither. Just wipe the seat off to make sure it's clean enough. It's your dirty butt. People who do that need to tone it down.

Heck no. I like to live dangerously.

No, I just wipe it off thoroughly. Though I constantly live in fear of the water splashing up.

a persons buttcheeks are cleaner than ones hands.

i never use any kind of paper on the ring.

Absolutely.

I always carry, handwipes in my shoulder bag. I wipe down the seat and the the part of the bowl closest to me. That just seesm better/faster/cleaner than using anything paper to cover a seat. Having handwipes is also good to have for all sorts of situations - clean a bus seat or bench, wipe down a table at a fast food place, clean you own damn hands, salvage any bathroom disaster, help a mother with a child, clean a stain off a shirt or pants, etc. That's why I carry handwipes, and not bathroom wipes...more flexible.

It may seem weird, but I carry in my shoulder bag nail clippers, handwipes, a lighter, a leatherman tool, extra ear buds, a bandanna, chem-light, some candy and painkillers, and one of those eight-end USB dongles that can charge or connect anything. Its like a mini-Preper bag. There is not a day that goes by when I'm not using one or two of those things.

Believe me when you stuck in a tunnel on a broken subway and you the only dude with some candy and can charge any cell phone you're a damn hero.

cowboy hats all the way

Does doing that even protect you from germs? Seems really unlikely.

That's what I do. Like, dude, poop is about to come out of your own butt. It's doubtful that anything worse than that is on the seat itself. Unless you have an open wound on your rear or thighs, you're going to be just fine sitting on the toilet seat.

In the rare times I poop in public I will just wipe the seat with toilet paper. Having some paper in the toilet also prevents water shooting up when you poop.

@narujoe93: nah there's more on your butt than in the toilet

I used to care, but now as long as it's not covered in piss or skid-marks, I'm good. My fine ass gets washed twice a day; dip it in almond oil and e'erthang, gurl.

The place where I work, the covers don't fit the entire seat, so they're kind of pointless.

I'm more concerned with adults still pissing all over the seat like a bunch of assholes. Too lazy to kick up the seat with your shoe?

Ill give it a good wipe down and sit. Throwing down a cover or creating some sort of toilet paper monument to sit on just wastes time man. I've got an additional question if your on the toilet and your settling in to empty the bowels do you pull out your phone to pass the time?

You guys know it's basically impossible to get a disease by seating on a toilet seat right?

I mean I'll wipe it down of needed but that's it

I generally avoid public bathrooms though

I don't sit, I stand.
Sometimes splash back from the toilet water can be an issue at that altitude though so I create a toilet paper nest in the bowl first.
A poop nest.

I bring my own water closet.

Topical, hard-hitting, important topic.

I build a nest on the seat with TP that's about a foot and a half tall if I have to have a push in public.

I also always try to find an obscure bathroom that doesn't get much use. Places like Best Buy usually tend to provide a spotless environment for delivering your food baby into the world.

I wipe it off and then sit.

Never heard of toilet cover sheets.. Sometimes when I'm in a public restroom I don't trust I'l use toilet paper, but mostly I just don't care.

Do you guys go through similar rituals before handling money, your keyboard or a light switch? Or layer your dining ware with tissue paper before putting your food on it after cleaning it with that kitchen sponge sitting on your sink?

There are things far worse than a toilet seat that you guys touch without thinking about it every day.

http://mythbustersresults.com/hidden-nasties

Edit:

Just to clarify, if there's visible shit on the seat I'll wipe it down of course, but sitting on a throne of TP is kind of a waste and doesn't really protect you from anything.

Also, those fancy automatic paper cover rotators that are popular in airports? Those spread more fecal matter, that ends up in the machine, onto the paper than they protect you from compared to a standard toilet seat.

I try to stick to this... but when you got to shit, you got to shit.

Toilet paper, double layered.

You people know too much about me now.

Bunch of prissy fucks in here. What exactly do you think you're going to get by touching your ass to a place somebody else did? Do you put tissue down at home too? What's the difference? Maybe friendly butts don't carry as much disease?

As long as there isn't visible shit or piss on the seat, I don't care. Typically, I'm not making a habit of shitting in public places.