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#1 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -
#2 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -

All the fucking time.

#3 Posted by scarace360 (4828 posts) -

You may have a problem.

#4 Posted by foggel (2763 posts) -

As retarded humans.
 
"Woooooooow!! Where did you get that leaf? That looks beautiful! So big, good job!"

#5 Posted by SethPhotopoulos (5286 posts) -

When I'm bored and talking to myself through the animal.

#6 Posted by Ragdrazi (2283 posts) -

Of course. They're little furry crazy naked people.

#7 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -

Toy? Where's your toy? Hell, you guys aren't that good.

#8 Edited by jakob187 (21676 posts) -

I talk to my dogs like they are awesome.  Luckily, they actually are awesome, so that helps matters.

#9 Posted by MaGicol_Trevor (11 posts) -

i talk to my pets all the time!

#10 Posted by mylifeforAiur (3485 posts) -
@Claude said:
" All the fucking time. "
I fucking hear ya, bro!
#11 Posted by DocHaus (1335 posts) -

Not really, aside from the occasional "goddammit cat!" when one of those furballs tries to trip me up as I'm walking through the house.

#12 Posted by kingofpeanuts (479 posts) -

All the time. It makes me question my sanity when someone walks in on me doing it and doesn't know how to act.

#13 Posted by Redbullet685 (6047 posts) -

Yes.

#14 Posted by LochNessie82 (34 posts) -

Of course!   When one is doing something that I don't want them to do, I ask "Cat, what are you doing?"  When they are sitting where I want to sit, I say "Sorry cat, but you need to move."

#15 Posted by MarkWahlberg (4606 posts) -

The only word my pets need to hear from me is 'kill'. Conversation is for the weak.

#16 Posted by InfamousBIG (3202 posts) -
@Claude: My pets ARE human.
#17 Posted by face15 (1302 posts) -

Absolutely not. I talk to my dog like it's a dog.... because it is.

#18 Edited by jorbear (2517 posts) -

I'm kind of InfamousBIG's ass slave. So I guess you could call me a pet. He only seems to talk to me through grunting noises though. 

#19 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -
@InfamousBIG said:
" @Claude: My pets ARE human. "
You don't count, you are your pets' pet. Pretty, pretty... pet.
#20 Posted by CharlesAlanRatliff (5432 posts) -

Yes. 
 
Animals are more intelligent than what many people give them credit for. One of my cats, for example, fucking LOVES Dragon Age.

#21 Posted by JJOR64 (19003 posts) -

Yeah.  Who doesn't?

#22 Posted by Guyzea (816 posts) -

I talk to my dog like a would a person. He understands when I say "Here" and "Let's go" because he gets excited and runs all over the house. He knows that it's either for food or to go outside.

#23 Edited by stinky (1549 posts) -
@face15 said:

" Absolutely not. I talk to my dog like it's a dog.... because it is. "

 
you bark at it? 
thats even weirder dude.  thats like a conversation neither of you can understand.
 
me, i'm a grown man that reverts to baby talk to cats. no apologies. 
#24 Posted by Aronman789 (2676 posts) -
@foggel said:
" As retarded humans.  "Woooooooow!! Where did you get that leaf? That looks beautiful! So big, good job!" "
Pretty much this
#25 Posted by Hockeymask27 (3683 posts) -

When I 'm bored i like to go wake up my cats by bugging and taunting them. Also when I leave and come home if they are by the door I will say hi/bye to them.

#26 Posted by Enigma777 (6074 posts) -
@Aronman789 said:
" @foggel said:
" As retarded humans.  "Woooooooow!! Where did you get that leaf? That looks beautiful! So big, good job!" "
Pretty much this "
Same here.
#27 Posted by GlenTennis (3145 posts) -
@foggel said:
" As retarded humans.  "Woooooooow!! Where did you get that leaf? That looks beautiful! So big, good job!" "
I do this, but then I also regularly converse with my dog as if he was a proper English gentleman.
#28 Posted by supermike6 (3566 posts) -

I chose aliens, because aliens.

#29 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -
@doublezeroduck said:
" Yes. I also talk to children like they were animals. A ton of "SIT!" and "STAY!" I don't like kids.  "
Kids suck before three, or so I've heard. And they're gross. My dog's balls are cleaner. And he doesn't have any.
#30 Posted by SadPatrol (500 posts) -

Yes. 
 
I dont want to insult my dogs intelligence by talking to him like a dog and I expect the same from him.

#31 Posted by Scooper (7881 posts) -

*My cat walks in meowing*
"Hello, Ben!"
*MEAAAOOOOOOWW*
"You alrite, mate?"
*MEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOWWW*
*Looks at mouse on the floor lying perfectaly still in fear*
*Goes to walk over to the mouse to put it in a bush somewhere*
*Cat quickly picks it up and I hear a crunch sound*
"Ben!!"
"Good cat ^_________^"
 
That's as far as any dialogue gets.

#32 Posted by iam3green (14390 posts) -

yes i do. i say like who is a happy cat? who's a happy cat? skattle is a happy cat.  i call my other cat blacky. i yell blacky a lot of times.

#33 Posted by Claude (16254 posts) -
@iam3green said:
" yes i do. i say like who is a happy cat? who's a happy cat? skattle is a happy cat.  i call my other cat blacky. i yell blacky a lot of times. "
Who's playin' a video game? iam3green is playin' a videogame. Play good now, you play good. That's a good iam3green.
#34 Posted by Smokay (525 posts) -

Cats are neither human,animal or alien they are abominations that must be destroyed

#35 Posted by FCKSNAP (2299 posts) -

My dog is less than a year old and I talk to it like we're stuck in an abusive relationship. 
 
"God dammit can you NOT leave your shit everywhere? YOU RESPECT MY AREA OF THE ROOM WHEN I'M NOT HOME OR I WILL SLAP YOU"

#36 Posted by Clinkz (1118 posts) -

For sure.

#37 Posted by Pinworm45 (4088 posts) -

kind of, but not in that creepy "does that person realize he's talking to an animal?" kind of way. 
 
But they totally understand some shit, man. And they like it, too.

#38 Posted by clarke0 (1077 posts) -

Yes, sometimes. I don't sit down and attempt conversation, but I'll talk at them. I never "baby talk" pets, because I typically find that pretty irritating when people do that all the time.

#39 Posted by Marz (5655 posts) -

my dogs seem to always understand me, they just lack the vocal chords to talk back to me :(

#40 Posted by Weltal (2274 posts) -

Rarely. I usually tell them to shut up or be quiet, as if it would have an effect. Shouting usually works though.

#41 Posted by onimonkii (2446 posts) -

yes but it never works. i think "dude get off my bed" translates to "roll around more" in cat.

#42 Posted by pweidman (2340 posts) -

Oh yeah I do, but to be honest, it too often involves cursing and threats upon their lives.0.0  LOL ,but they're used to grumpy daddy :).
#43 Posted by GunnBjorn (2911 posts) -

No, beating them up is more effective (then they're actually quiet and that's what I want them to be after a hard days work) and even way more satisfying (as in stress-relieving). It's a good thing I do not have a wife/girlfriend and/or children.
#44 Posted by McGhee (6094 posts) -

It's OK to talk to your pets. Only seek help if they start talking back.

#45 Posted by rjayb89 (7724 posts) -

Aliens.  Just aliens.

#46 Posted by FancySoapsMan (5834 posts) -

I like the confused stare my dog gives me when I talk to her.

#47 Posted by Subjugation (4722 posts) -

Yes I do, because honestly, I bet they are smarter than a decent amount people. Sometimes I ask myself how some people graduated from high school.

#48 Posted by Afroman269 (7387 posts) -
@Claude said:
" All the fucking time. "
#49 Posted by EveretteScott (1498 posts) -
@foggel said:
" As retarded humans.  "Woooooooow!! Where did you get that leaf? That looks beautiful! So big, good job!" "
=D
#50 Posted by Skald (4367 posts) -

"Baby talk" is strictly out, this is more like five-year-old level talking.