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#1 Posted by Quipido (640 posts) -

So I was just listening to the 03-16-2010 BombCast and around 14mins in guys talk about Mafia II and how they announced cooperation with Playboy, resulting in collectibles in game being those magazines. 
 
Shortly after a couple of guys mention an experience of founding some old, water-damaged porn magazines in the woods and all of them speak about it as if it was completely common thing. I realised my very first contact with hardcore pornography was exactly the same: me and bunch of guys from the neigbourhood found some heavily damaged magazines in the woods.
 
What the hell? How is this possible? I mean, today's kids have probably more advanced means to get to this stuff, but I find it weird that I have so similar experience as those guys... is this just coinsidence? Or do yu guys consider it normal and have experienced it as well?

#3 Posted by LordXavierBritish (6320 posts) -

Sometimes people masturbate in the woods.

#4 Posted by Giantstalker (1675 posts) -

Do the sticky page test... if it fails, well, I think you have your answer

#5 Posted by vidiot (2737 posts) -

Back in elementary school, there was a section of our playground that got roped-off one-day because someone found pornographic magazines. Like someone had died there.
 
So...Wait, damn, you have a point. 
o.O  
What the hell?!

#6 Posted by TotalEklypse (1000 posts) -

Furry porn does.

#7 Posted by Slaker117 (4843 posts) -

Being someone who can't remember a time before Windows, this seems crazy. I get the idea of having porno mags and wanting to keep them out of the house out of fear of being caught, but why would you leave them in the woods? It seems like they would easily be forgotten, lost, stolen or destroyed. Surely there are better places to hide contraband.

#8 Posted by CharlesAlanRatliff (5439 posts) -

Yep! When I was in elementary school at a friend's house, we went into the woods behind his home to discover a bunch of cut up porn magazines. It was awesome. Not sure how the girl who was with us felt about it, though.

#9 Posted by salad10203 (654 posts) -
@tfsteefs said:
I think that is a very much a 'growing up with out the internet' experience
lol, so true, except I was the dude who hid my mags in the woods : (
#10 Posted by Sanity (1937 posts) -

Yea, i had the same experience as well, we had a cooler burried in the woods as kids with porn, gasoline, and other shit we shoulden't have had in it. Sadly ants got in and ate holes all through the pages so you had to imagine the parts that weren't there.

#11 Posted by JayDee (440 posts) -

the internet is trill! amen

#12 Posted by Adziboy (702 posts) -

I found my first in woods as well, what the fuck. Unfortunately it was a 60+ magazine... and luckily it got stolen from me.

#13 Posted by hoossy (936 posts) -

I used to live in Germany, so there was porn scattered all over the woods... I think it was their thing, pornography in the wilderness

#14 Posted by ThePwnee (234 posts) -

Never in the woods, but I did find some soaked scraps of porno in the sewer one time

#15 Posted by MaFoLu (1858 posts) -

Goddamn swedish forests and their inability to grow porn!

I think I'll have to buy some mags right now and plant my very own pornography tree!

#16 Posted by Yummylee (22039 posts) -

Bears get lonely too.

#17 Edited by YogoPogo (40 posts) -

When I was a kid there used to be tons of old porn in a machinery scrapyard near my house that would always be surrounded by beer bottles. I always thought it was filthy drunk hobos wacking it out there but it was probably just teen dudes

#18 Posted by RandomInternetUser (6789 posts) -

If it did, I would be in the woods a lot.

#19 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -

Bears like masturbation as much as humans. Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.

#20 Posted by crusader8463 (14423 posts) -

You people have weird woods.

#21 Posted by YogoPogo (40 posts) -
@Video_Game_King said:
Bears like masturbation as much as humans. Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.
Hah you go ahead and google "Bear porn magazine" and tell me what pops up. It's not going to be what you're expecting
#22 Posted by NickBOTT (481 posts) -

A while back my friends and I were walking home through a wooded area and stumbled upon a porno mag that had all its pages torn out and scattered along the ground.  Maybe somebody was jerking off to it in the woods and thought they heard someone coming so they tried to tear up the magazine and run for it?  Who knows, but you may be on to something here Quipido.

#23 Posted by Gizmo (5389 posts) -

You ever downloaded a porno off the internet, 'finished' with it, felt incredibly dirty and deleted the file? 
 
 
Yeah, it's exactly the same thing, but for the pre-internet age.

#24 Posted by CL60 (16906 posts) -
@Video_Game_King said:
Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.
Speak for yourself.
#25 Posted by Hot_Karl (3309 posts) -

Nah, but wood certainly grows when I'm watching porn! 
 
AMIRITE?

#26 Posted by DonChipotle (2781 posts) -

Some friends and I once found some porn mags in the woods. I felt like we were uncovering someone's shame because they were some fetishistic mags. Like he or she was so ashamed of being into golden showers that they went out to the woods and tossed them.

#27 Posted by Burzmali (452 posts) -

Yep, totally found my second mag in the woods that grew along the canal behind my house. The first mag was a friend's that he stole from his dad. I'm pretty sure found porn in the woods is just stolen porn that some kids are keeping away from the house to avoid being found out by their parents.

Protip: if you find water-logged magazines, microwave them for about 20 seconds. That will get them pretty close to dry and you can salvage them. Probably not useful info in the time of the internet, but you never know.

#28 Posted by Scapegoat (131 posts) -

Haha I can attest to this. When I was 10-12 me and my brother rode our bikes out to this trail in the woods that had porn mags stashed in a bush. Was pretty awesome.

#29 Posted by PenguinDust (12551 posts) -

The woods is the best place to masturbate.  If no one hears you, you didn't make a sound.  Watch out for all the bear shit, though. 

#30 Posted by James_ex_machina (905 posts) -

Long before the internet... men stashed their porn in old junked cars, the woods, the garage. the toolshed, and the boat in the backyard.

I clearly remember finding porn in these areas from my uncles(maybe) when I was a kid. My grandparents had a huge farm. My cousin and I would overturn every inch of it looking for stuff. Other than porn we would find the usual six pack of beer stashed. back to the thread question... Yes I would find and hide nudie mags in plastic bags slightly buried here and there.

#31 Posted by MegaMetaTurtle (414 posts) -

Walking back from school through the woods me and my friends found a porn mag. Weird this has happened to so many people.

#32 Posted by Spoonman671 (4692 posts) -

Yep, that's where I got my porn as a kid.

#33 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -
@CL60 said:
@Video_Game_King said:
Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.
Speak for yourself.
You mean watching Winnie the Pooh and realizing that he's not wearing pants gives you a raging hard-on? Sicko.
#34 Posted by CL60 (16906 posts) -
@Video_Game_King said:
@CL60 said:
@Video_Game_King said:
Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.
Speak for yourself.
You mean watching Winnie the Pooh and realizing that he's not wearing pants gives you a raging hard-on? Sicko.
If that makes me wrong, I don't wanna be right.
#35 Posted by CitizenKane (10507 posts) -

My brother, his best friend and I found my dad's old Playbody stash. One of them from the 80s featured our school's 10th grade English teacher. The weirdest part of it was that she was hot in the photo. @__@

#36 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -
@CL60 said:
@Video_Game_King said:
@CL60 said:
@Video_Game_King said:
Of course, nobody wants to fuck a bear, so that's why you don't see any bear porn magazines.
Speak for yourself.
You mean watching Winnie the Pooh and realizing that he's not wearing pants gives you a raging hard-on? Sicko.
If that makes me wrong, I don't wanna be right.
It is wrong. If anything, Piglet should turn you on. After all, he's a walking penis. What more could you want?
#37 Posted by dungbootle (2458 posts) -

You all grew up in a strange time, it seems.

#38 Posted by AngelN7 (2970 posts) -

I find more surprising that everyone lives near some woods , but I guess is better than find that stuff in some city alley

#39 Posted by Damian (1538 posts) -

I didn't have woods where I grew up. But I'd find that suff in shady alley ways. Different kind of bears, there.

#40 Posted by Sanity (1937 posts) -

@angeln7: Not everyone lives in a over-populated smog filled shit hole... i mean city.

#41 Posted by Bocam (3784 posts) -

The only things I ever found in the woods were used condoms and a dead guy.

#42 Posted by Subject2Change (2966 posts) -

Found my dad's stash in his drawer under some files when I was like 12-13. Got caught looking at Celeb Porn (bad shops) at my friends house by his mom. Comp was on dialup in her room and she got home from work and walked in and my friend quickly turned off the computer. It was so awkward. Found some in like a community basement thing in the co-op area i grew up in with some friends, one of my friends ended up setting it on fire. Also someone posted a bunch of pictures on the handball courts (it's I believe primarily a New York sport/game) at a local park. I saw a lot of porn as a kid...

#43 Posted by TheHT (11505 posts) -

Elementary school, found snippets of porno magazines at the back by a park with friends. Thinking about it now, it's kinda really fucked up.

#44 Edited by CookieMonster (2423 posts) -
@LordXavierBritish said:

Sometimes people masturbate in the woods.

I know someone that once went on a walk with his family in the countryside and ran ahead and masturbated behind a tree. 
 
Yep.
#45 Posted by Kyreo (4600 posts) -

@tfsteefs said:

I think that is a very much a 'growing up with out the internet' experience
#46 Edited by CommodoreGroovy (557 posts) -

Oh shit. You guys as well? What's so great about the woods anyway? 

#47 Posted by iam3green (14390 posts) -

wow, it is pretty true. i remember finding porn in the woods also. people made a fort pretty much just a platform, it had porn around there.

#48 Posted by Lunar_Aura (2779 posts) -

When I was a kid visiting Yosemite I needed to take a mean dump and I found a Redbook to use as toilet paper. Nobody jacks it to Redbook, right? I didn't wipe my virgin ass with some dude's crusty pervert semen, right?

#49 Posted by thedj93 (1237 posts) -
@Bocam said:

The only things I ever found in the woods were used condoms and a dead guy.

at the same time?!?!?!?!
#50 Posted by RsistncE (4496 posts) -
@LordXavierBritish said:

Sometimes people masturbate in the woods.

God I almost pissed myself after I read this.