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#1 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

I would be a shoe, I don't have time to explain it right now.

#2 Posted by kornholio360 (280 posts) -

I would be a dildo, I don't have the time to explain it right now. ;)

#3 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

You're already a figurative dildo.

#4 Posted by WhySoSerious (646 posts) -

A giant lamp so I could light up the world!

#5 Posted by Philanthropy (142 posts) -

A Cucumber

#6 Posted by mtgrill (12 posts) -

An old school rotary phone, I don't have time to explain it right now.

#7 Posted by Dr_Feelgood38 (1550 posts) -

Companion Cube because I would never threaten to stab you.

#8 Posted by Vision (796 posts) -

A stripper pole, i don't have time to explain it right now.

#9 Posted by Lepuke (327 posts) -

A life size cow made entirely out of hamburger.

#10 Posted by Foil_Charizard (345 posts) -

A post-it that says i don't have time to explain it right now. I don't have time to explain it right now

#11 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

When will you guys be able to explain those things, because I'm kind of curious?

#12 Posted by CryingHero (62 posts) -
I'd be fossil.. I've loads of time to explain :D. People would always be looking for me and when found me I'd be the center of attention and I'd be put in a museum where everyone would stare. Only messing, I'm not shallow. I'd probably be a brick...
#13 Posted by Foil_Charizard (345 posts) -
CryingHero said:
"I'd be fossil.. I've loads of time to explain :D. People would always be looking for me and when found me I'd be the center of attention and I'd be put in a museum where everyone would stare. Only messing, I'm not shallow. I'd probably be a brick...
"
Because that's how interesting you are?

=D jk, couldn't resist 
#14 Posted by mr_korean (610 posts) -

I would be an animal cracker. Don't have time to expla- *runs away

#15 Posted by error11 (79 posts) -
kornholio360 said:
"I would be a dildo, I don't have the time to explain it right now. ;)
"

lol same
#16 Posted by Kevin (369 posts) -

I would be an exploding barrel, I don't have time to explain it right now.



Btw, can we finally add "I don't have time to explain it right now." into the first of Giant Bomb's community inside jokes?

#17 Posted by Axersia (1615 posts) -
kornholio360 said:
"I would be a dildo, I don't have the time to explain it right now. ;)
"
Dammit! Someone beat me to it already!
#18 Posted by Termite (2398 posts) -
Kevin said:
"I would be an exploding barrel, I don't have time to explain it right now.



Btw, can we finally add "I don't have time to explain it right now." into the first of Giant Bomb's community inside jokes?
"
Yes.

That and RAPIER!
#19 Posted by Blu_Magic (2021 posts) -

A lamp because lamps are awesome.

#20 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

You can't be a lamp, somebody else is already being a lamp.

#21 Posted by TheOGVandalvideo (142 posts) -

A rechargeable battery, because I like to turn things on.

Hiyo.

#22 Posted by Page1 (92 posts) -

Are cats inanimate objects? I want to be a cat.

#23 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

Cats are only really considered inanimate objects in the land of idiots.

#24 Posted by Page1 (92 posts) -

Okay then I would be a potato, it's been one of my life goals to be a potato.

#25 Posted by Oriental_Jams (3063 posts) -

I would be a wall, I really do not know why either...I am a truly strange person.

#26 Posted by Batman (1016 posts) -
kornholio360 said:
"I would be a dildo, I don't have the time to explain it right now. ;)
"
I knew this would be the first post! :D
#27 Posted by henjin (829 posts) -

A statue. One of those that lasts a long time that are made out of solid stone or marble or somthing

#28 Posted by sponge3164 (407 posts) -

speakers, hopefully to someone with good music taste D:

#29 Posted by WorldsFastestShrimpPeeler (458 posts) -

probably a door, i dont know why

#30 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -
Oriental_Jams said:
"I would be a wall, I really do not know why either...I am a truly strange person.
"

Expect Terri Hatcher to run into you very soon.
#31 Posted by TeknoMeister (20 posts) -

I think this thread is unfair to the inanimate objects. You should at least ask them what they would be if they were animate, but you don't even bother to care about how they feel.

I refuse to support your unjust ways.

#32 Posted by BulletPulse (183 posts) -

A planet.

#33 Posted by BiffMcBlumpkin (3720 posts) -

Don't open my thread to Uranus humor.

#34 Posted by outsidethewall (26 posts) -

The weird like paper holder thing on pen lids.

I guess I just like to help people.

#35 Posted by DJSneakyBear (55 posts) -

a pokedex...so i would know all boutz teh pokemanz-_-

#36 Posted by Apollo (471 posts) -

Stripper Pole or sex toy...

Although i suppose it would be torture.

#37 Posted by BulletPulse (183 posts) -
BiffMcBlumpkin said:
"Don't open my thread to Uranus humor."
Lol I didnt see that one coming. XD
#38 Posted by Ultimate_pwr_rngr (774 posts) -

I'd be an internet.

#39 Posted by Black_Raven (1759 posts) -

First thing that came to mind was a dildo, but that could be pretty risky.

#40 Posted by Jonathan (654 posts) -

An Inanimate Object? I would be Hayden Christensen. ZING!

#41 Posted by Jotun (555 posts) -

A lighter, because there is one on my desk and he looks lonely.

#42 Posted by Schizoid (1064 posts) -
outsidethewall said:
"The weird like paper holder thing on pen lids.

I guess I just like to help people.
"
Some little kid will most probably throw you across the room.

I would be a speaker!
#43 Posted by RVonE (4638 posts) -
Dr_Feelgood38 said:
"Companion Cube because I would never threaten to stab you.
"
That's actually really good :)
I would prbably be a bed because I want to be warm and cosy.
#44 Posted by Mello (5 posts) -

....wait... when you become the inanimate object would it become animated? or would it stay inatimate? 


i dont think i would ever want to be inanimate... but if it were to animate, i would be....

a puppet....
#45 Posted by RVonE (4638 posts) -
Mello said:
"....wait... when you become the inanimate object would it become animated? or would it stay inatimate? 

i dont think i would ever want to be inanimate... but if it were to animate, i would be....

a puppet....
"
Interesting twist. I guess it would be animated, otherwise you wouldn't know you are an inanimate object.
#46 Posted by Tridgen (120 posts) -

i would be a huge speaker :p

#47 Posted by Apollo (471 posts) -
Mello said:
"....wait... when you become the inanimate object would it become animated? or would it stay inatimate? 

i dont think i would ever want to be inanimate... but if it were to animate, i would be....

a puppet....
"
You can never learn anything from someone who wants a hand shoved up their ass...
#48 Posted by MisoRonery (468 posts) -
And on the tenth day....
Yes, I would definitely be a McGriddle.  Sweet, delicious, and deadly.  I would be placed by my minions in the dressing rooms of my favorite starlets.  With no fear of being eaten, touched, or spoken to by them I could simply watch them undress without fear of ruining the fantasy by actually interacting with them.











#49 Posted by ReTarDedFisHy (1065 posts) -

ReTarDedFisHy would be... a Giant Bomb.
'nuff said.

#50 Posted by MrMiyamoto (1272 posts) -

I'd be CANDLEJACK because he will nev