John Drake and 22 Cokes: Can he be saved?

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Sidewalkchalk

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From last night's livestream, Mr. Drake states that he is on diet Coke number 20. I thought to myself, "self, that sounds like a whole fuckload of caffeine. I wonder how much caffeine that is." So self Googled it. 45mg per can times 20 is 900mg. Is that a lot? Let's find out. We'll round up to 1 gram since Mr. Drake double fisted two further diet Cokes during this stream.

A cup of drip coffee averages 140mg of caffeine. How many cups does it take to ingest a gram of caffeine? Just over seven.

Should we be concerned for the savior of Harmonix's health? Is this causing John Drake's violent outbursts as seen last night? Make your voice heard.

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deactivated-630b11c195a3b

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He's fucked.

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Sidewalkchalk

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For reference, that's four extra-strength No-Doz. The sleepless aid manufacturers recommend taking no more than one pill every 3-4 hours. It's up to us to save a life.

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Sterling

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#4  Edited By Sterling

I prefer diet coked up Drake over non coked up Drake.

Also this: http://i.imgur.com/vydezQX.gif

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InternetDotCom

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#5  Edited By InternetDotCom

More important: Can we save Diet Coke from John Drake?

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PillClinton

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Caffeine isn't his problem; it's the rest of the shit in diet soda that makes something so sweet contain zero calories. That's not good for you, and if you don't realize that, you're woefully ill-informed.

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Prestige

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Are you saying Drake had 22 Cans? Maybe finishing the last one will reveal a life-changing secret.

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Flappy

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#8  Edited By Flappy
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chaser324

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#9  Edited By chaser324  Moderator

Clearly, drinking 22 cans of Diet Coke is just John Drake paying homage to Peter Molyneux's latest project, 22Cans.

In all seriousness though, if you maintained that pace for an extended period of time, your kidneys would probably get wrecked pretty quickly.

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Jimbo

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He's passed the test and may now go and work with Molyneux.

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MooseyMcMan

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#11  Edited By MooseyMcMan

I have a theory.

Drake flies a lot, thus, he probably gets a lot of radiation and whatnot from flying.

BUT

This radiation is saving him from the deadly effects of Diet Coke.

Now, if you'll just proceed to my Kickstarter page where I am getting the funds for more scientific study of this theory...

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Jimbo

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FFFUUU ^^

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Vinny_Says

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#13  Edited By Vinny_Says

He should probably just switch over to coke at this point. Same effect but without all that sugar.

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Sidewalkchalk

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@prestige said:

Are you saying Drake had 22 Cans? Maybe finishing the last one will reveal a life-changing secret.

I like you.

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TheHT

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It's all good and fun, but he should really be careful with all of that. John Tiberius Drake is a national treasure!!

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Dalai

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@prestige said:

Are you saying Drake had 22 Cans? Maybe finishing the last one will reveal a life-changing secret.

John Drake is a god?

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rebgav

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I like John Drake half dead, with a stomach full of industrial waste. Don't fuck this up for me.

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FengShuiGod

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#18  Edited By FengShuiGod

Yup, this conversation is totally normal.

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Oldirtybearon

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@chaser324 said:

Clearly, drinking 22 cans of Diet Coke is just John Drake paying homage to Peter Molyneux's latest project, 22Cans.

In all seriousness though, if you maintained that pace for an extended period of time, your kidneys would probably get wrecked pretty quickly.

People have died so far from over indulging on diet sodas. At least two of them have been in the news recently. I won't be surprised if John Drake misses E3 next year due to renal failure.

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coakroach

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Someone switch him to green tea or something, it felt like he was about to chew Brad Muir's face off last night.

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Dallas_Raines

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icicle7x3

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#22  Edited By icicle7x3

John Drake IS diet coke.

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Hunter5024

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I think he was lying. You can't trust him.

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Humanity

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I'm pretty sure his body has evolved to take in diet Coke much like a car guzzles fuel.

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TruthTellah

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#25  Edited By TruthTellah

John Drake is from a future where Diet Coke is like water.

No Caption Provided

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rpgee

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#27  Edited By rpgee

So that's a lot of caffeine, but he doesn't seem like he's exploding yet. This does, however, remind me of Black Blood of the Earth, which the Tested folks brought up last Octoberkast. I wonder what that would do to him...

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Winternet

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#28  Edited By Winternet

Drake doesn't even live on the same plane of existence we common mortals do. He's already on a superior state of mind where death has no meaning.

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TheManWithNoPlan

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John Drake follows not the constraints of normal men.