Nintendoeats Absurd Challenge #1: Make My Honda Civic Less Boring

(Will there be more absurd challenges? I have no frigging idea)

In January I bought a really good condition 2001 Honda Civic. Then, while I was away at GDC last week, the transmission died.

Awesome.

So now I've borrowed some proper money from my parents and bought a 2006 Civic Hybrid. We all know what they look like, but I'll throw up a picture anyway (not of mine specifically).

I could deal with the 2001, because ti felt right. I'm a student, I have my shitty car, and the only thing that I've done with it is put in my own stereo and leave a lot of garbage lying around. And an acoustic guitar. That is how it should be.

But now I have a grown-up car. Ironically, it technically IS way cooler. I don't know if you know this, but hybrid technology is really neat. The problem is that civics are on the objective top 10 most boring cars list (I think that Sunfires are on the top, but since Pontiac doesn't exist anymore I guess I shouldn't be too hard on them). I mean, at least the Mazda3 has that neato 50s thing going on with the dashboard. Somebody at Honda was clearly watching an unhealthy amount of Star Trek, because the inside looks like a spaceship, and not the cool "used universe" kind.

Anyway, I have decided that I need to do something about this. Now, I do have some limitations. Firstly, I'm pretty much broke. I just bought a car. Second, I may one day bequeath this vehicle unto my parents. So I can't...you know...light part of it on fire. They're pretty open minded, but anything that could be construed as "damaging" the car might go over poorly. So lets avoid that shall we?

And that's my challenge. What would you do to make my Honda Civic cool? Here is an image of the most broadly (as in not gaming nerdy) cool thing that I own, to inspire you.

By the way, I've been watching Top Gear (The British one obviously). I thought that was relevant somehow.

ROCK AND ROLL!

Nintendoeats

• fuzzy dice
• weird japaneez plushies on the rear
• rimz

Pick two.

Licorice dispenser in the dome light like the Mirthmobile in "Wayne's World".

@Lunar_Aura: Rims are like the iPods of making cars cool.

@Toebias_Funke: I like this idea. You know that licorice that the squad are all touchy about from Sweden. I LOVE THAT STUFF.

pffffft simple

flames make everything cooler

Is there a reward for any of this?

Racing stripes, yo.

@Video_Game_King: Pics. So if your idea is boring, so is your reward.

I would love to see you put some fins on that bitch.

Get in multiple accidents and then have pieces of your car replaced with non-matching parts. That way, you get a patchwork blue Honda Civic with a blue body, a black roof, a black fender, a bumper attached via big bolts, and a red driver-side door.

My Honda Civic has character.

@spartanlolz92: @deathfury: @MistaSparkle: Ok, I'm game. Any recommendations about how?

Make it looks like a Mad Max car. Yeah, break something, make it dirty, put chains and leather on it, hell, maybe throw a seat away and...
 
@nintendoeats said:

Now, I do have some limitations. Firstly, I'm pretty much broke. I just bought a car. Second, I may one day bequeath this vehicle unto my parents. So I can't...you know...light part of it on fire. They're pretty open minded, but anything that could be construed as "damaging" the car might go over poorly. So lets avoid that shall we?

@TruthTellah: It might look more interesting, but do you find that people are afraid to get into a car with you?

@MikeGosot said:

Make it looks like a Mad Max car. Yeah, break something, make it dirty, put chains and leather on it, hell, maybe throw a seat away and...

@nintendoeats said:

Now, I do have some limitations. Firstly, I'm pretty much broke. I just bought a car. Second, I may one day bequeath this vehicle unto my parents. So I can't...you know...light part of it on fire. They're pretty open minded, but anything that could be construed as "damaging" the car might go over poorly. So lets avoid that shall we?

OH C'MON!

I KNOW. I know. I appreciate your enthusiasm though.

@nintendoeats: Not really. None of the accidents have actually been caused by my driving. I was hit sitting at a light, and another time I was just parked in front of my home when a 16 year old girl plowed into the side of my car. So, people generally know that the look is more about the character and history of the car than my driving ability.

Plus, I'm an artist; so, I suppose it doesn't seem particularly odd for me to have a rather "unique" looking vehicle. ha.

@TruthTellah: Gotta love 16-year olds. I don't trust 16-year old me to drive a car, and I know for a fact that he never caused an accident.

@nintendoeats: How skilled are you with paper mache?

@MikeGosot said:

Make it looks like a Mad Max car. Yeah, break something, make it dirty, put chains and leather on it, hell, maybe throw a seat away and...

@nintendoeats said:

Now, I do have some limitations. Firstly, I'm pretty much broke. I just bought a car. Second, I may one day bequeath this vehicle unto my parents. So I can't...you know...light part of it on fire. They're pretty open minded, but anything that could be construed as "damaging" the car might go over poorly. So lets avoid that shall we?

OH C'MON!

I KNOW. I know. I appreciate your enthusiasm though.

@nintendoeats: heh. Yeah, it's really wild how bad some drivers can be. Though, this girl's father was a nut. Tried to suggest that most of the damage was before she rammed right into it. He even tried to pose as me at the mechanic where I was getting it worked on, trying to see if I was ripping him off with the damages quote I gave him. Really wild stuff.

Bad parents often breed bad drivers.

@MistaSparkle: I've never done it before. Sounds like a great place to start!

@nintendoeats said:

@Lunar_Aura: Rims are like the iPods of making cars cool.

More importantly, they're a performance downgrade.

@nintendoeats said:

@spartanlolz92: @deathfury: @MistaSparkle: Ok, I'm game. Any recommendations about how?

Well, I am definitely not an expert on any of this stuff. But from what I understand high quality vinyl or painted stripes could cost you a fair bit. If you're really running on the cheap, there's always duct tape racing stripes.

@deathfury said:

@nintendoeats said:

@spartanlolz92: @deathfury: @MistaSparkle: Ok, I'm game. Any recommendations about how?

Well, I am definitely not an expert on any of this stuff. But from what I understand high quality vinyl or painted stripes could cost you a fair bit. If you're really running on the cheap, there's always duct tape racing stripes.

:) I'm thinking electrical tape. My dad uses it to "Van Halen-ize" his guitars.

Set it on fire.

My dad used to keep a canoe on the roof of the family car, and it was there for no other reason than to look cool. If you have access to a canoe or a bike or something, you can mount it to the top and make it look a bit cooler.

@UnrealDP: Doesn't that kind of counter-act the whole "I spent the extra money on a hybrid" thing?

@nintendoeats said:

@UnrealDP: Doesn't that kind of counter-act the whole "I spent the extra money on a hybrid" thing?

I've never been to your house before, man! I'm guessing you've got something you could slap on top of that thing! Maybe steal from your friends? They're probably understanding people.

@UnrealDP: I was thinking more about fuel efficiency. I have MANY large cool things that I could stick on top of the car.

Paint it with a TV motive a la Persona 4, extra points if you get the windows tinted yellow. Even more extra points if you throw some of the tarot cards on the back of the car or somewhere on it.

@nintendoeats: Oh... Well.... I didn't think of that..... Yeah, I guess that is a big selling point on a hybrid, huh? Well, I got nothing....

I'll admit that the outside of the Civic is boring as hell, always has been, the sedan version that is, hatchback Civics are a bit more interesting. However, the inside, how can you NOT think that's cool? What kind of crazy are you? That looks pure awesome! Why wouldn't you want the inside of your car to look like a spaceship?

@Shirogane: If it's going to look like a spaceship, I want the inside of my car to look like a rugged machine. I want every interface and mechanical working exposed to me. I want it to be pure utilitarian, with some work done on it at some point that requires a wrench to permanently hold a bolt in place.

I can sort of understand why somebody might like the Civic interior as it is, but to me it just seems like it's trying to hard. Now if it had a commander's chair and came with peons that drove it for you...then we could talk.

@nintendoeats: Jungle Growl? That stuff sounds delicious but I've never had any.

Eagle feathers in the seats, Eagle bones encrusted on the dash.....just add more Eagle.

Find some neon glow in the dark tape in either red or green and then stick it on your wind shield so it looks like you have a HUD.

Flame decals.

/thread

Get a lamp and hook it up in the back seat of the car in the middle. Or a disco ball.

@Ducksworth: Hmm, it seems like the best thing to do is to put the tape on the dashboard so that it's REFLECTED in the windshield, which looks even cooler.

@c0l0nelp0c0rn1: What now?

Convert a rabbit vibrator into a hood ornament, and write 'HMS MOTHERFUCKER' on the side in calligraphy

@nintendoeats: The licorice that you're fond of. It's called something like djungerval but with an umlaut over the 'u'. Pronounced Jungle Growl.

@c0l0nelp0c0rn1: Oh, I was referring to the overall candy category of weird licorice. Especially the salty stuff.

@nintendoeats: Racing stripes, that's what your car needs.

The great thing abut Honda Civics is that they're boring. Don't be one of those guys who puts $10,000 into his Civic, because a $15,000 Civic with $10,000 in upgrades is still a $15,000 Civic.

I wrote out a bunch of things and then I went back and looked at the picture of your car. Then I deleted all of that because there is no hope. That car looks boring as shit and ain't nothing's gonna fix that I don't think.

@MB: Oh no no, I don't want to spend $10,000 on my Civic. I want top find the most effective use of 10 single dollars.

Case in point, I'm pretty sure that H on the front is about the same size as a copy of Yars Revenge...

@Lunar_Aura said:

• fuzzy dice
• weird japaneez plushies on the rear
• rimz

Pick two.

If you do this I will hunt you down

@MB said:

The great thing abut Honda Civics is that they're boring. Don't be one of those guys who puts $10,000 into his Civic, because a $15,000 Civic with $10,000 in upgrades is still a $15,000 Civic.

this,

Don't be a tool and add stupid shit to an uncool car to try and make it look better, it wont and you will stand out like a sore thumb, also, pretty much all comments in this thread are baaaad ideas,

Dude, you've just bought the wrong car to try and make it "Cool" also,

Hybrids aren't a good use of tech, the amount of damage to the enviroment that goes into making the engines far outweighs the savings in petrol use,

Sorry to try and be a downer on your purchase tho, I hope it gives you good use, If you do eventually buy a car with your own money and not your parents and you want something cooler, I'd recommend a VW Golf GTI or Scirocco, you don't have to do anything to them to make them cool and they'll be good on mileage cause of the smaller engines and light frame,

Also, they are sporty so it'l feel responsive as hell, and the golf is 4 door with more room than you'd think.

Get a girlfriend, buy her some nice clothes, and put her in the passenger seat when you drive around.