#1 Posted by Jay444111 (2441 posts) -

BEHOLD THE NIGHTMARE FUEL!!!

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/7.382567-Terrifying-Kissing-Device-Enables-Long-Distance-Love-Sort-Of

Dear God... That is one of the scariest things I have ever seen in my entire being of existence! Seriously, it is a egg with a fucking frown on it! IT IS AN EGG WITH A FROWN ON IT!!! The worse thing... is that you are supposed to kiss it and make out with it... that is so ungodly terrifying that it sends shivers down my back. Like... what if it glitches up and bites your tongue off? Seriously, what then!? You can't tell anyone that you had your tongue bitten off, not only because you can't speak well anymore but also the fact that it would come with you admitting you own such a horrifying device!

Also... this is the LEAST scary one they made! Yes people... this is the least scary version they have made so far... I am not sure if I am happy or scared even more!

GiantBomb... you guys know what must be done... PHOTOSHOP HOOOOO!!!

#2 Posted by MariachiMacabre (7096 posts) -

Henry Kissinger would make a sweet cyborg.

#3 Edited by believer258 (11902 posts) -

...yeah, if she's that far away and I'm longin' for some lovin', I'll just go have a date with Rosie Palms.

EDIT: I wonder what happens if you... ah... "get creative" with it?

#4 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -

@Jay444111 said:

Seriously, it is a egg with a fucking frown on it! IT IS AN EGG WITH A FROWN ON IT!!!

You mean Zero Punctuation?

#5 Posted by RPGee (759 posts) -

Hmm, interesting concept. This seems like the sort of thing you'd find on extremerestraints.com.

#middlest

#6 Posted by MikeGosot (3227 posts) -
@believer258 said:

...yeah, if she's that far away and I'm longin' for some lovin', I'll just go have a date with Rosie Palms.

EDIT: I wonder what happens if you... ah... "get creative" with it?

DEAR GOD! You had to go there didn't you?
#7 Posted by believer258 (11902 posts) -

@MikeGosot said:

@believer258 said:

...yeah, if she's that far away and I'm longin' for some lovin', I'll just go have a date with Rosie Palms.

EDIT: I wonder what happens if you... ah... "get creative" with it?

DEAR GOD! You had to go there didn't you?

What? Everyone was thinkin' it, I'm just sayin' it.

#8 Posted by The_Laughing_Man (13629 posts) -

Wasnt this a Futurama episode? 

#9 Posted by _Zombie_ (1462 posts) -

@believer258 said:

...yeah, if she's that far away and I'm longin' for some lovin', I'll just go have a date with Rosie Palms.

EDIT: I wonder what happens if you... ah... "get creative" with it?

Heh.. heh.

#10 Posted by BraveToaster (12590 posts) -

@RPGee: That's creepy.

#11 Posted by TheHumanDove (2523 posts) -

I stopped reading at "not interested in "sexual uses for [the Kissenger]"

#12 Posted by RPGee (759 posts) -

@BraveToaster:

Even creepier when you look around the site for a little bit before realising "Oh wait, I'm single."

#13 Posted by TheSouthernDandy (3867 posts) -

This is a joke right? This has to be a joke. I'm not gonna carry a friggin nightmare egg around with me so get a robo kiss from anybody.

#14 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -

How does it go with the gooch?

#15 Posted by crazyleaves (646 posts) -
@believer258

...yeah, if she's that far away and I'm longin' for some lovin', I'll just go have a date with Rosie Palms.

EDIT: I wonder what happens if you... ah... "get creative" with it?

Oh, you need two hands? You big stud!
#16 Posted by living4theday258 (679 posts) -

the video is horrible, everyone in it is like WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT GUY KISSING THAT EGG FOR!?!?!?!?

since it wont let me post the video here

#17 Posted by SpunkyHePanda (1665 posts) -

Just put some googly eyes and a wig on it.

#18 Posted by Grimhild (723 posts) -

Looks like something you'd find living down the hall from Eraserhead.

#19 Posted by Jay444111 (2441 posts) -

Seriously people... time to use photoshop skills... we kind of need to!

#20 Posted by piyakhan (9 posts) -

gud .great conversation here.its relly helpful..

#21 Posted by Landon (4143 posts) -

I think I saw this on geekologie, like, 2 years ago.

#22 Posted by LD50 (415 posts) -

Lars and the creepy egghead dildonics peripheral.

#23 Posted by TheDudeOfGaming (6078 posts) -

Can it preform oral?