Phrases That Annoy Me
By Pinworm45 92 Comments
I could care less
We've been over this one a hundred times, but apparently it'll take a hundred and one until people figure it out.You could care less? Does that you mean you care a lot? Well obviously you care some amount, if it's possible for you to care less. How much do you care?
What it really means
Of course, what people are trying to say is that they couldn't care less. Why they don't simply say that, I'll never know.
Sometimes people say it's sarcasm. Well, in that case, the statement is just as stupid. It's very poor sarcasm. In fact, most people inflect "care less" when saying this statement, so I don't even think that holds up. But even if the sarcastic word is "could", it's still a very poor way of expressing it. A proper sarcastic variant would be "I care a lot". Or you could, you know, just say you couldn't care less.
That's just like, your opinion, man
Every time I see someone say some variant of "that's just your opinion" I want to gargle razorblades. Who's fucking opinion do you think I'm giving?What this really means
What they're really trying to do is belittle your opinion, but having absolutely no empirical evidence to argue against it, they attempt to minimize it's value by saying "that's just your opinion".
What a completely useless statement. It literally says nothing. Do you people who say this really want every sentence to end with an asterisk and a disclaimer saying "note: this is my opinion"? Why? This statement says literally nothing. It's a complete waste of bandwidth. You may as well quote every single person on the internet and say "well you just typed that". Wooptyshit, Sherlock.
But I guess that's just my opinion.
Have your cake and eat it, too
In this one, it's not the actual phrase that bothers me, it's people thinking they're hot shit because they realize that what's the point in having cake if you can't eat it?What it really means
What this phrase is NOT saying is that I want to be able to eat cake. What it is saying is that I want to have cake while also being able to eat it. You can not have something that has been consumed, ergo, the phrase is saying I want to have it both ways, have the best of both worlds, etc. I want to have money but able to spend it too is an analogy. If you spend your money, you have lost that money and then do not have it. Simple. You're not clever for realizing cake is useless without being able to eat it, and the phrase wasn't suggesting anyone wants to have unedible cake.
That's it for now. What are some phrases that grind your gears? (I just set you up to say you're bothered by "grinds my gears". Roll with it.)