So today i was doing my normal jiu-jitsu training. everything was going normal. class ended and then my instructor asked me to stay late. he said he had a guy that was fighting in a cage fight in 2 months and needed jiu-jitsu training. he wanted me to fight him for 10 minutes in a grappling match. the dude weighs 180 pounds i weigh 120 pounds..... but i said ok.
we fought for about 4 minutes before he kneed my ribs and pulled my head sideways cranking my neck until i tapped out. No problem i say and we continue. 7 minutes in he has now been squeezing me for so long i get annoyed and go for an armbar. he picks me up and slams me on the ground so i let go and he backs up. we stand back up and start again. 9 minutes in he gets on my back and starts a rear naked choke. my arms are pinned under my stomach and hes squeezing my trachea so hard i cant even say the word tap. (bad technique on his part but it works) he finally lets go as i black out. when i wake up i tell my instructor im done.
My instructor then stands up and starts screaming at me how big a pussy i am and how pathetic i am in front of the other students. (hes never done anything like that before). he then finishes the minute for me smashing this guy and of course looking at me like "see its not so hard" i walked out very pissed off. i wasnt on my game today and between that and the 60 pounds he had on me i just couldnt do anymore.
So has anyone had a moment like this? Be in it video games or otherwise? Where you just couldnt get it right and gave up? Or where you got your ass beat repeatedly? Especially if someone was there to tell you how big a pussy or wimp you were? i shared my sad pussifying experience. now share yours.
Sometimes a person just doesn't feel he can do more.
When that happens to me I say to myself: "Live to fight another day.".
I've given up on games, and other things because I couldn't do more, or was humiliated. It happens... I just accept it and move on. A person can't win them all, and even losing requires grace most people don't seem to have. Everybody loses sometimes, the only thing that varies is time and space.
I've dealt with bad instructors before with an inflated ego. I would move on... You can find better training elsewhere. Martial arts training isn't supposed to be a pissing contest. It is supposed to be about humility. Hope you feel better!
Agreed, I know dozens of "Instructors" & I'm personal friends through my father with grand Master Joon Rhee, the way your instructor acted is inexcusable.
He is supposed to set an example for you, emphasize the fact that you tried your best while you where outmatched, & that it's only for self-defense. You didn't embarrass anyone.
@Dany: ive practiced with this guy before in normal jiu-jtisu with a GI on and starting on the ground for 5 minutes. its not that i couldnt of said no its just i expected him to expect me to not be able to beat him.
@Everyones_A_Critic said:
Your instructor seems like a bit of a douche.
hes actually super nice. i dont know if he was having a bad day or takes his fight training a lot more serious than his jiu-jitsu training.
Dude seems like a dick, if he holds that against you, I would take the others' advice and try to find a new instructor. When I took Tae Kwon Do classes my instructor was nothing like that, he was a very nice guy.
I used to wrestle in high school at heavywieght division. Before every meet me and our other Heavy had to have a match to see who would take the varsity starting spot. I was leaps and bounds better than him and always came out aggressive. One time he decided he wanted to become an immovable object so I couldn't score points on him. Eventually I made a mistake and he was able to score back points on me. I recovered, but never scored, so he took the spot. Everyone, including myself, was disappointed, but no one called me a pussy. thats rough.
if i had a fight coming up and my trainer decided to train be by having me choke out a guy that was 60 lbs less than me and had no chance, i would be pissed and prob would be like "really? you're a trainer?"and apologize to little dude.
how did he yell at you in front of all the other students when you were staying late after the class was already over
@phrali: class ended at 8:30 we have open mat and bags until 9 every night. it was his first day of training any grappling. hes a 3rd degree black belt in tae-kwon-do and has kickboxing experience. my instructor just wanted to see if he could grapple at all.
hahahahahaaa i thought the same thing when i got home. i was like "wtf just happened... am i in the cobra kai and dont even know it?!"
hes normally really nice and im assuming he will apologize tomorrow. ive trained under him every day for 2 years now. it was just disheartening tonight. i was ilke "gettin my ass kicked is bad enough dont rub it in like that...."
@tunaburn: I'm a little guy (weigh around 115 at age 28), and I used to take karate back in high school. I remember there was one point where I was sparring with someone who was older than me and obviously bigger, we were working on throws and doing full contact stuff, and I reached this point where I just realized that I was physically no match for him, even if I was more skilled, my puny body would never win in a real life, straight up fight. And that really depressed me, and freaked me out, and I actually, literally started crying about it. So there's a related, relevant low point for ya, hope it makes you feel better!
@SuperfluousMoniker: dude i didnt want to say it... but i almost cried when i realized the same thing. i was like what the fuck man... ive trained so hard for 2 years and theres nothing i can do to this guy... got home feeling really depressed. by the way im 120 pounds 25 years old.
@tunaburn: Yeeep. I take solace in the fact that if it came down to it, I know the correct way to kick a guy in the kneecaps / balls and run like hell should it ever be required. Fortunately I've never been in a real standup fight in my life, and I hope it stays that way.
@SuperfluousMoniker: dude i didnt want to say it... but i almost cried when i realized the same thing. i was like what the fuck man... ive trained so hard for 2 years and theres nothing i can do to this guy... got home feeling really depressed. by the way im 120 pounds 25 years old.
You weight that little at the age of 25? :/
I'd say stop jiu-jitsu and train with some serious calorie heavy food instead.
Well here's one from kinda of the opposite perspective.
When I was a teen, I spent a lot of time boxing, especially at the old Police Boy's Club near my Grandma's.
I had a mate there I used to spar with, as we were the two most advanced guys there. However, I had about 6 inches (booyah!) and 30 kilos on him, and overall I was just a better fighter even without those advantages.
Anyone he got sick of me thrashing him all the time, and came up with a cunning, one shot plan to teach me a lesson, as I had gotten a little cocky. He knew that I had broken my jaw as a kid, and he puposely allowed me to land some pretty vicious shots on him just so he could get inside and uppercut me.
It's the only time I have ever been knocked out. He paid for it with allowing me to smack him around first, but he proved his point and I learnt a lot of humility that day.
My guess would be that he probably bragged you guys up and expected you to at least hold your own against him, and when you didn't he got pissy and threw a temper tantrum because you made him look bad in his eyes. Anyone like that in a teacher position is not someone you want to learn from. I would look for a new teacher myself.
@SuperfluousMoniker: dude i didnt want to say it... but i almost cried when i realized the same thing. i was like what the fuck man... ive trained so hard for 2 years and theres nothing i can do to this guy... got home feeling really depressed. by the way im 120 pounds 25 years old.
Don't feel bad. There is a reason weight classes exist in competitions. The littler guys are always going to have trouble with the bigger guys if they are of similar training levels. Truth is, with your training, you would crush almost any normal 180-200lbs or more dude in a confrontation. When they have the same training level as yourself, that's when you are going to be challenged.
I really disagree with the way your instructor acted. It wasn't professional, and it was an attempt to humiliate you. Given the text in your initial post, it would seem it worked. If this is a breach of character for him, so be it. You never know what shit a person is having to deal with in their life. If this becomes a regular routine of his, I'd strongly advise you to seek out a new instructor.
@SuperfluousMoniker: dude i didnt want to say it... but i almost cried when i realized the same thing. i was like what the fuck man... ive trained so hard for 2 years and theres nothing i can do to this guy... got home feeling really depressed. by the way im 120 pounds 25 years old.
Dude, it's Jiu Jitsu. Sure, you don't wanna GRAPPLE with a guy weighing 60 lbs heavier unless you've really trained with it in mind, but there are still striking options for situations like that. I'd say mix in some different arts if you can. And man, your instructor does sound like a prick. The way you described it kinda seemed like your opponent wasn't really taking the appropriate care in a sparring session...Obviously, choking someone out isn't something to play with. Why didn't your instructor just grapple with the guy?
@Unchained: thanks for the advice. i hope youre right about that. because ive trained everyday for 2 years straight now. i always thought if i had to fight some random dude i could defend myself. last night ruined my confidence.
That was a really dick move by your instructor man. We all have our days where we can't perform up to what we know we're capable of so my advice is to just accept that it happened, know that you're better than that and move on.
Agreed, I know dozens of "Instructors" & I'm personal friends through my father with grand Master Joon Rhee, the way your instructor acted is inexcusable.
No fucking shit? When you take Joon Rhee self defense, you can proudly say "Nobody bother me"!
Those were the commercials of my Saturday morning cartoons...its funny because until about 5 or 6 years ago, I had no clue that Joon Rhee was a renown master, I just had the jingle in brain.
Agreed, I know dozens of "Instructors" & I'm personal friends through my father with grand Master Joon Rhee, the way your instructor acted is inexcusable.
No fucking shit? When you take Joon Rhee self defense, you can proudly say "Nobody bother me"! Those were the commercials of my Saturday morning cartoons...its funny because until about 5 or 6 years ago, I had no clue that Joon Rhee was a renown master, I just had the jingle in brain.
Ya, my father was his student for 20 years & ran a few of his tae-kwon-do schools in Virginia. Joon Rhee is a pretty amazing man.
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