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#1 Posted by gamefreak9 (2344 posts) -

So theres a girl right accross from me, i have read a few body language books and i think i'm getting quite a few signals to approach, i am on my computer and she is on hers in the studen library in UNI :P. What do i say? Its annoying to know when something is happening but not knowing what to do about it...
#2 Posted by Jack268 (3387 posts) -

Hey baby we should fit well together because I've got a chubby as well

#3 Posted by McDom (70 posts) -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzouzhXSRzY    

#4 Posted by thunderzach (14 posts) -

That Alec kid is such a pimp.

#5 Posted by MisterChief (831 posts) -
@thunderzach said:
" That Alec kid is such a pimp. "
That Alex Kidd is such a pimp.
#6 Posted by thunderzach (14 posts) -
@MisterChief said:
" @thunderzach said:
" That Alec kid is such a pimp. "
That Alex Kidd is such a pimp. "
It's true. I've seen the rule 34.
#7 Posted by gamefreak9 (2344 posts) -

not doing it for me so far...

#8 Edited by Rockdalf (1274 posts) -
@gamefreak9 said:
"

not doing it for me so far...

"

 

Pickup flowchart:  

 

Can you take her somewhere? -->     Yes --->  "Would you like to grab a cup of coffee?"   

 
 l 

    

 No  

 l 
V  

 *Stare wantingly, imagining a time when you're old enough to have a license so you can do nice things like these.*  

#9 Posted by Psych0Penguin (412 posts) -

"Hey baby, you got any [your ethnic denomination/ heritage] in you? Do you want some?"
 
CANNOT FAIL

#10 Posted by raiz265 (2234 posts) -

Hi there... 
Yo bitch...
...what are you doing 
...how are you 
...wanna have rough dirty sex right here on the table 
 
 
combine it as you see fit

#11 Posted by gamefreak9 (2344 posts) -

Well entertaining suggestions but i just could not muster up the courage... oh well thx anyways bombers... I cant beleive how useless i am.

#12 Posted by PhatSeeJay (3322 posts) -

Pro tip; Learn to say "Hi".

#13 Posted by skywing (1153 posts) -

More useless than you, consider how useless we all are at providing advice :D

#14 Posted by DonutFever (3550 posts) -

Ask her how much a polar bear ways, when she says "I don't know" say "Me neither, but I'm pretty sure it's enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm [Insert your name here]" 
Brought  to you by Weekend Confirmed.

#15 Posted by Eric_Buck (1290 posts) -

Just walk up to her and say: 
 
Daddy's home. 

#16 Posted by No0b0rAmA (1490 posts) -
@PhatSeeJay said:
" Pro tip; Learn to say "Hi". "
#17 Posted by JustKamToo (663 posts) -

Don't
  

  

#18 Posted by Rawrnosaurous (768 posts) -
@DonutFever:  Cannata get out of here you know that's not gong to work!
#19 Posted by Flaboere (344 posts) -

Ask her if she knows about googledocs, since every living student should! At least it's an excuse to open a conversation. If she says "yes", well. I don't know. Run away screaming.

#20 Edited by floodiastus (1262 posts) -

Insult/Compliment as always, for example: 
"Hey, your neck is wierd.... but in a good way, very sexy" 
 
Make them doubt themselves, and then reassure them. If you can make them feel reassured at a premature level (complimenting and making them feel like they did when they were younger) you got it all ACED!

#21 Posted by Cramsy (1164 posts) -

I've laughed pretty hard at some of these posts :) 
 
Just say hi, want to grab some coffee. 
 
Too easy. Girls like confidence. 

#22 Edited by kittencake (99 posts) -

i'm a girl, you should listen to me. i suggest you say "hi, how's it going".
 
pretty simple eh?
 
edit: i also suggest you don't refer to her as a "chick"...

#23 Posted by kittencake (99 posts) -
@floodiastus said:
" Insult/Compliment as always, for example: "Hey, your neck is wierd.... but in a good way, very sexy"  Make them doubt themselves, and then reassure them. If you can make them feel reassured at a premature level (complimenting and making them feel like they did when they were younger) you got it all ACED! "
i really can't tell if you're joking or not...
#25 Posted by zFUBARz (624 posts) -

poor bugger
 
next time try something simple like, "hey my laptop isn't connecting to the network, is yours? "
"oh it is? ok so it's my machine then "
wait a minute, pretend like you're trying things "hey sorry i wanna see if it's my user ID(say it cooler though) mind if  log in through yours/you log in through mine?" assuming your uni has a netwrk like most where you're logged in with your own unique ID
hers of course works "well darn, then I'm not sure what the problem is, thanks a lot by the way I'm (insert name)."  don't ask hers, it makes it more obvious you're trying to start a conversation, she'll probably just tell you.
wait a few seconds, close your laptop a little frustrated, she should still be watching you. "well looks like i can't do anywork for a little bit. I'm gonna go grab a coffee/other drink/snack/etc.mind watching my computer/stuff for a minute? awesome thanks" walk away a step or two " Oh hey (insert her name) want me to grab you anything?"
she declines most likely.
"hey it's no problem, I owe you for the trouble" 
come back and have a little chat, and maybe ask for an email/phone number, if you used her computer, pay close attention to what she had up, facebook, notes, essay, other websites, if it's something you can build off of in a minute or two, then use it, don't bring it up immeadietly though, otherwise she'll also know that you did it on purpose.
 
come on kids get creative here!
better luck next time guy!
 
PS insult/compliment only works well after you've been talking for a bit, otherwise you come off as a jerk.

Online
#26 Posted by arab_prince (2053 posts) -
@kittencake said:
" @floodiastus said:
" Insult/Compliment as always, for example: "Hey, your neck is wierd.... but in a good way, very sexy"  Make them doubt themselves, and then reassure them. If you can make them feel reassured at a premature level (complimenting and making them feel like they did when they were younger) you got it all ACED! "
i really can't tell if you're joking or not... "
Because you know, deep down, that that works. 
 
Go up to her. Till she notices you, as if you are about to say hi. But DONT! Just stand there looking at her. She will be looking at you expecting something. Then after a while she will say "hello?" or something like "can i help you?" Then you go "psht, not interested" and walk away. For the next couple of days she will be thinking about you non stop. Then one day just go up to her and say FINE we can go out once.  And voila, love story.
#27 Posted by fearthephins (148 posts) -

I'm a girl and honestly the best thing you can say is just "Hi " . If she's not a complete ass she'll say hi back and then you kind of just take it from there. If she gives you a smug look and brushes you off .... you'll be better off not knowing her, trust me. So don't feel rejected at all of something like that happens. :)

#28 Posted by Ineedaname (4319 posts) -

Go to the toilet, masturbate into your hand, go over say hi, and then flick it in her face.

#29 Posted by Inkerman (1449 posts) -
@Ineedaname said:
" Go to the toilet, masturbate into your hand, go over say hi, and then flick it in her face. "
But as you're saying hi, you must yell "MY NAME IS SPIDERMAN!" Then flick it in her face.
#30 Posted by mubblegum (250 posts) -

Show her the giantbomb thread you're on.

#31 Edited by McSmunions (582 posts) -

this is probably too late to help the OP but it's still useful for all you others out there picking up the ladies. guaranteed to  "increase your pussy intake by 10 ma-fuckin fold"
 
  

  
 
ASS AND TITTIES!!
#32 Posted by benjaebe (2783 posts) -

Touch her shoulder.

#33 Posted by swamplord666 (1757 posts) -

in all honesty, best way you could make a good impression is strike up a conversation relating to what she's doing. 

#34 Posted by bearshamanbro (284 posts) -
@McSmunions: ROFL, that was awesome. With some modifications I believe his approach can work. Might just have to find some classy versions of those techniques for classier women and adjust accordingly.
#35 Posted by Wrighteous86 (3745 posts) -

So theres a girl in this thread, i have watched a lot of The Pickup Artist and i think i'm getting quite a few signals to approach, i am on my computer and she is on presumably hers on Giant Bomb  :P. What do i say? Its annoying to know when something is happening but not knowing what to do about it... 

#36 Posted by brookisol (83 posts) -

This thread is so depressing; people who can't say 'hi' to girls, and people who learned their 'pickup skillz' from The Game.

#37 Posted by WatanabeKazuma (989 posts) -

Wow, seamless this isn't.

#38 Posted by EvilTwin (3324 posts) -
@Wrighteous86 said:
" So theres a girl in this thread, i have watched a lot of The Pickup Artist and i think i'm getting quite a few signals to approach, i am on my computer and she is on presumably hers on Giant Bomb  :P. What do i say? Its annoying to know when something is happening but not knowing what to do about it...  "
She totally wants you.
#39 Posted by imsh_pl (3295 posts) -

Go over to her desk, drop a rubber raptor under her legs and ask her: "Excuse me, is this rubber raptor yours?"

#40 Edited by melcene (3056 posts) -
@Rockdalf said:


Pickup flowchart:  

 

Can you take her somewhere? -->     Yes --->  "Would you like to grab a cup of coffee?"   

 
 l 

    

 No  

 l 
V  

 *Stare wantingly, imagining a time when you're old enough to have a license so you can do nice things like these.*  

"
This.  Simple.  Perfect. 
 
@Wrighteous86: As long as its not the one that gets offended by girls being called chicks, you're probably ok. 
 
 
Oh wait, am I supposed to add "I'm a girl" to the beginning of my post?   -.-
#41 Posted by Wrighteous86 (3745 posts) -
@melcene said:
 Oh wait, am I supposed to add "I'm a girl" to the beginning of my post?   -.- "
Actually, if you can include that fact in every post you make, it'd probably just be easier for all involved.  That way we know to treat you differently...
#42 Posted by Zealousadonis (133 posts) -

Literally pick her up. It worked the one time I did it so in my mind it has a 100% success rate.

#43 Posted by mmzOne (276 posts) -
@Rockdalf: Wait, you need license to drink coffee? That stuff is messed up.
#44 Edited by melcene (3056 posts) -
@Wrighteous86: I was just being smartass because there were already a couple posts that started that way.  :)
#45 Posted by Enigma777 (6057 posts) -

Excellent thread is excellent

#46 Posted by Wrighteous86 (3745 posts) -
@melcene: I was just playing along.  No offense meant.
#47 Posted by melcene (3056 posts) -
@Wrighteous86: None taken!  This whole thread is entertaining.
#48 Posted by RVonE (4605 posts) -

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THIS THREAD?
#49 Posted by Tofford (526 posts) -

 A bad chat up line is always good because if she laughs then she is probably pretty cool

#50 Posted by floodiastus (1262 posts) -
@kittencake said:
" @floodiastus said:
" Insult/Compliment as always, for example: "Hey, your neck is wierd.... but in a good way, very sexy"  Make them doubt themselves, and then reassure them. If you can make them feel reassured at a premature level (complimenting and making them feel like they did when they were younger) you got it all ACED! "
i really can't tell if you're joking or not... "
regardless, that shit works ;)