So last night, my roommate calls me up and says "hey, it's movie night...so let's have cookies and beer". Fuckin eh, right? Totally. My buddy comes along (lenin from the third episode of Chess Club Massacre, known as Log here on the boards). We've all three been talking about Sham-WOW and Slap Chop for the past week non-stop, and so when I get to the apartment, I find that my roommate has bought some Sham-WOWs. Needless to say, we put these fuckers to the test to find out if that ex-Scientologist Vince Offer is lying to us all!!!
First Test: Drying A Sweater
Unfortunately, we didn't have a sweater on hand, but right away, we could tell that this was failure. You cannot fit a sweater into one of the Sham-WOWs, so in turn, we decided to use something that would probably prove a bigger test: a soaked dish-rag. After soaking this thing for a few seconds, we rolled the dishrag up in the Sham-WOW, squeezed and punched a little, then came to find out that the dishrag was...pretty damn close to dry. After we let the rag sit for about two minutes, it was dry. Therefore, we're saying that...while this doesn't go EXACTLY with what Vince implies, it works pretty damn well. Grade: B+
Second Test: Drying A Surface
Lucky for the Sham-WOW, our coffee table at the apartment is a glutton for punishment. We poured some water out onto the table, then wiped it up with the Sham-WOW. After that, we continued to wipe up the excess water left behind, and then we realized that we still had to clean up. What we ended up realizing is that the water from the Sham-WOW was actually being pressed out of the Sham-WOW and back onto the table. We tried with little to no pressure, and this seemed to work a little better. Overall, however, we're not impressed with its ability as an everyday wiper-upper. Grade: C-
Third Test: Drying A Tongue
My roommate decided to try sticking the Sham-WOW to her tongue as a way of potentially getting rid of whatever illness we've had recently. What were the results? The Sham-WOW will even absorb the saliva from your mouth and leave your tongue feeling crisp and clean! = D Grade: A+
Fourth Test: Drying The Carpet
This is the one test that we were really skeptical of. It just didn't seem very feasible. Now, mind you, we didn't have any way to actually pull up a portion of carpet in order to find out whether the Sham-WOW went all the way through. However, from just the little bit of Dr. Pepper I spilled this morning on the way out to work...I'm impressed with the initial ability of the Sham-WOW for picking up stains from your carpet. There was no discoloration after I was done. Once I get home, I'll see if it has remained that way. The only bitch was that it took some serious pounding into the ground with my fist to get the soda out of the carpet. Preliminary Grade: A-
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From the four tests that I've seen with my own eyes and compiled, I'm convinced that the Sham-WOW is a pretty nifty product indeed. While I think a Slap Chop would've been a bit more useful for us to have around the apartment, I've gotta say that I'm impressed with the Sham-WOW. I'm curious to try it as a bath towel, so I'll let you guys know how that turns out. Otherwise, the 8 Sham-WOWs we got for $20 were definitely worth the value so far.
Although, I'm still weary about their machine-washability.
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