Smash Mouth decides to eat 24 eggs to save dying children

We did it you guys.

It was a long, hard road but we finally did it.

Steve is going to eat the eggs, all the eggs.

Smash Mouth said they would eat the eggs if we raised $10,000 to save dying children, and we did it.

The children don't have to die.

I cannot even begin to describe the joy I felt as the money ticker slowly crept up to the 10k mark. In fact I am so overwhelmed with various emotions that I am can only barely type this message to you, but I have to go on.

The world needs to know.

I am perhaps most relieved that the children are finally getting all of that hard fought money they deserve. Smash Mouth, for whatever reason, didn't think dying children were worth their time and other people's money, but we finally got them to come to their sense by hitting them in the one place no celebrity of yesteryear can withstand repeated bludgeonings to.

Their social media efforts.

That's right, by targeting Smash Mouth's twitter and facebook accounts with new members and messages in the thousands, we managed to make Smash Mouth genuinely believe people still cared about them. We overinflated their collective ego to the bursting point, and it was at that point they knew they had to eat the eggs lest they lose all those new converts to the house of Harwell.

We may never truly know why Smash Mouth hates dying children so much, but one thing is for certain.

We saved those kids you guys, we did what needed doing and we saved the fuck out of those kids, Smash Mouth be damned.

I am so proud of all of you.

pussies.

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

@ImpendingFoil said:

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

Heroes.

 @LordXavierBritish said: 

We may never truly know why Smash Mouth hates dying children so much, but one thing is for certain.

We saved those kids you guys, we did what needed doing and we saved the fuck out of those kids, Smash Mouth be damned.

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

While the initial post is dripping with sarcasm, I am not joking when I say this: I tried to eat 24 eggs once, I ended up with extremely high cholesterol and approximately zero children were saved. WHY WASN'T I THE ONE CHOSEN TO SAVE THESE KIDS?!

@Deusx: No, but you see the last thread was the mission briefing.

This is like the awards ceremony.

@LordXavierBritish said:

@Deusx: No, but you see the last thread was the mission briefing.

This is like the awards ceremony.

Hold on a minute, I'll let you eat yo' eggs.

Smash Mouth is still a thing?

How could they possibly say no to this? I mean, how else is Smash Mouth going to stay at all relevant in 2011? Not that eating 24 eggs is going to do that but it's a start, I guess.

@LordXavierBritish said:

@Deusx: No, but you see the last thread was the mission briefing.

This is like the awards ceremony.

Hold on a minute, I'll let you eat yo' eggs.

@Redbullet685 said:

Smash Mouth is still a thing?

You'd be surprised at some of the bands that are still around. I was utterly shocked when I saw a newspaper ad a few years ago for an appearance by REO Speedwagon at a local casino. As I recall, I just stared at it in utter disbelief because seriously, who the hell listens to REO Speedwagon these days?

@Hailinel said:

@Redbullet685 said:

Smash Mouth is still a thing?

You'd be surprised at some of the bands that are still around. I was utterly shocked when I saw a newspaper ad a few years ago for an appearance by REO Speedwagon at a local casino. As I recall, I just stared at it in utter disbelief because seriously, who the hell listens to REO Speedwagon these days?

I went to an REO concert not long ago and they are still actually pretty okay.

Also Pat Benatar was there.

Egg Mouth.

It ain't no joke

I'd like to

Buy the world a toke

And teach the world to sing in

Perfect Harmony

And teach the world to snuff the

Fires and the liars

Something something something walkin on the sun...

This whole thing is absolutely ridiculous, and makes me think of how many ways I could sadistically abuse being rich. (For example: give someone their dream car, but force them to have a vanity plate that says GAYMAN, despite them being homophobic). 
 
 
Anyways, people also seem to forget what Make a Wish Foundation actually does. They don't really save children from death, but make their last months more comfortable.

I was about to follow you, but then I realized that I'm already following you.

@Deusx: Yeah and 24 kids just died because smash mouth at their eggs :(

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

@ImpendingFoil said:

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

This.

I was about to follow you, but then I realized that I'm already following you.

This continues to be the stupidest fucking thing ever. Why is forcing these people to eat eggs so important...

I can't see how this is going to Save Dying Children. Unless this guy eating the eggs is going to provide the inal $10,000 needed to fund the research that will definetly discover the cure for whatever the children are dying of.

Can't see that happening.

Penny Arcade already runs a charity that makes sick childrens life a little easier, and it doesn't require anybody demeaning themselves in public either. It just relies on peoples innate sense of goodness.

There's something else at work here. Some wierd desire to humiliate someone in public. It isn't necassary and it isn't going to save anyone from dying.

I would observe great irony if those kids were dying because of starvation.
 
Either way, this is absolutely ridiculous. Either you donate the money or you don't. Making someone eat 24 eggs is beyond stupid. The Apocalypse can't come soon enough.

This is beyond retarded. Since when does donating money to charity have to hinge on some celebrity's decision to stuff his face with food? You'd think people would want to donate because you know... it helps other people.

It's about time he ate the eggs. All those children saved!

Once I told a homeless guy outside my work that I'll give him money if he ate the old moldy sandwich that I was about to throw away.

If you really wanted to save children you'd give them 10,000 dollars AND the 24 eggs.

@LiquidPrince said:

This continues to be the stupidest fucking thing ever. Why is forcing these people to eat eggs so important...

There is a subtle yet resonant hope that greater than 50% of the band will suffocate on boiled chicken farts.

Fixed@chrissedoff said:

@LordXavierBritish: haha reo speedwagon was never good, you joker if smash mouth tries any funny business like dividing 24 eggs between all of them then i'll be so mad that i'll fart

Wait, do they all have to eat 24 eggs or just one of them?

@Eaxis said:

Egg Mouth.

Witty.

That's bullshit. Rotten eggs or it's a no-go.

At a loss for words, people are so silly.

What kind of fucking assholes refuse to donate money to dying kids if a band will not eat twenty-four goddamn eggs.

@LordXavierBritish said:

Smash Mouth, for whatever reason, didn't think dying children were worth their time and other people's money

No, because eating 24 eggs is fucking retarded and anybody who would hold money away from charities because one guy didn't eat two dozen eggs needs to be punched in the face a couple of times.

Fuck off

This is still ridiculous. Hooray children don't have to die now?? 24 eggs are being eaten by a band who I can't believe still exist.

This is the stupidest, most unfunny and mean spirited joke on the internet. Just give to money to charity you twats. In the end what does this say about the people involved, they care more about the humiliation of one person who they don't even know than the children and families of those children that they're supposed to be helping but then again this is the Internet.

Damn it Smash Mouth why the hell did you cave in to this bullshit?

Hard to believe people are actually blaming the band. The money has been raised, donate it and forget about the band..

I've never been more proud of you guys than I am right now.

Seriously. I mean it. Way to go. This is no longer about being an internet forum, we've saved lives. Bless you.

I still hope the children die anyway. Greedy little shits.

@Deusx: Yeah and 24 kids just died because smash mouth at their eggs :(

@Pie said:

Fuck off

I am deeply offended.

All I'm doing is trying to promote charity, don't you like charity?

I don't quite know how to say this, but some people are too internet.

Deja vu

wait ...

Deja vu