Like the title says, I wrote a children's book entitled The Musical Snowman. It's about a snowman who finds himself in a jungle, and his mission is to teach animals the wonders of music. Do any fellow bombers have any experience with publishers or the process, or is there anybody who wants to proofread or offer legitimate feedback for me. It would be a picture book, so it's only 3 or 4 pages single spaced. Also, I don't need people telling me about illustrations, most publishers prefer to choose their own in house illustrators, unless the author is an established name. I've already started talking to a publisher, but I want to know if any one has tips for the process, or experience
So I wrote a children's book
" I'd write a children's book but I don't think children want to hear what I'd write for a children's book, no...I don't think their parents would like what I'd write in a children's book. It would sell well in Japan though. "Dude... What is up with you and weird pedophilia related things?
I'll just bump this to ask the Giant Bomb community to write a children's book. The world needs The Whiskey Duders and the Giant Bomb, and we're the only people who can deliver that, along with a better name!
The "Musical Snowman" is the name of a sexual maneuver... I'm not sure if you were aware of this before you wrote the book. It's when someone fiddles around with your cock as if they're playing a flute and then eventually you come onto their head and face, making them resemble a snowman.
@Video_Game_King said:
" we're the only people who can deliver that, along with a better name! "I'm aware.
Haha, god, that's funny.
Children's books are one of the hardiest things to get published, it amuses me you think you can just whip up a block of text in ten minutes and think about getting published. Plus, you didn't even attempt to write a children's book either. Just because it's about a bunch of animals playing music doesn't a children's book make.
"Plus, you didn't even attempt to write a children's book either. "
Technically combining Frosty the Snowman and the Jungle Book into a single premise qualifies as an attempt.
The Musical Snowman“Snowmen don’t belong in the jungle,” thought Lion, as he stood in the middle of the tall trees. But that’s just what Lion saw, a snowman. “Are you lost?” said Lion, calling out to the strange figure. “On the contrary my maned fellow, I am right where I need to be. I am (), a traveling musician, and I have come to teach you and your fellow animals the wonder’s of music.” “Uhm, ok, well in that case, let me take you to my friends.”So Lion and Snowman started walking through the jungle. They passed magnificent waterfalls, giant flowers, and the tallest trees imaginable. But Lion had wandered far from home, and as the trip took longer, and the day grew hotter, Lion noticed that Snowman started to get smaller. Lion decided they should stop to rest. “Hey, I don’t mean to be rude, but you don’t look so good,” said Lion, staring at the increasingly large puddles snowman was leaving behind. “Nonsense,” replied snowman, “I’m just a little hot, that’s all.” Looking up at the sky, Snowman noticed how big the sun looked, and he suddenly realized what he just said. “Oh no! I’m melting!” shouted snowman, as he began to panic. “Calm down, let’s look for some shade, said Lion, frantically looking around. “Aha, over here is perfect,” came lion’s voice from under a pile of rocks, but there was no reply from snowman. Lion stepped out from the shade, and Snowman was nowhere to be seen. All that was left was a large puddle of water, a carrot, and charcoal eyes.
“Now what am I supposed to do?” thought Lion. He didn’t want to go back to his friends and tell them he was responsible for the melting of the only snowman ever in the jungle. Lion decided to take a long way home, so he could think about what to say to the other animals. Before he knew it, Lion realized he had come to the edge of the forest, and now was standing by the black rock that marked the land of people. “Uh-oh, I better turn around and go another way.” But before Lion could leave, he heard a roaring in the distance getting closer, and closer. Lion had never heard a noise like that, and he was too scared to move.
Suddenly, a large boxy shape came speeding across the black rock, with smoke and loud music coming out of it. “Ahh, a monster!” though Lion, “could this day get any worse?” But the monster was not headed for Lion. It kept moving along the black rock, but out of a hole in its side flew a small box. As the monster disappeared, Lion crept slowly towards the box to see what it was. As lion got closer, the top of the box flew back, and a long necked creature popped out. “You’re the smallest giraffe I’ve ever seen,” said Lion, too scared to say anything else. The creature turned to look at him with a shocked expression on his face. “Excuse me, are you talking to me? Did you just call me, ME a giraffe? I am the great Eldred, the most magnificent, wondrous jack-in-the-box ever created.” Lion stared at Eldred confused, “so is your name Jack or Eldred?” “Oh poor Lion, how stupid you must be living here deep in the jungle. I have much I can teach you.” Lion remembered the snowman, and had an idea. “Can you teach my friends and I music?” “Can I teach you music?…I composed with Beethoven, sang with Pavarotti; it would be harder for me to not teach you music….you’ll have to carry me though” So lion, who had no idea what Eldred was talking about, picked him up and they headed back into the jungle.
Lion had been gone all day, and when he arrived back home, all of his friends were curious as to what he was doing. “I found someone who is going to teach us how to play music,” said lion proudly. Now, living in the jungle day after day can get boring, so all of the animals were very excited with the idea. They lined up to introduce themselves to Eldred, eager to get started. “I’m Gertrude,” said a rather large Elephant. “Gertrude my dear, you were born for the flute.” “I’m Monkey,” said a snake, “and I’m Snake,” said a monkey. “Well, you two can play the violin and the viola, might as well make it even more confusing.” “And I’m Arthur,” said a shy little turtle. “Well, good sir, you will play the tuba, a magnificent instrument.” All of these instruments Eldred mysteriously pulled out of his box, but it seemed like he had no more. Disappointed, Lion asked “What about me? What will I play?” Eldred beamed at Lion, “Dear Lion, you were made a leader. The instrument is beneath you. You shall be a conductor, and from your hands will come beautiful music.” “Hmm, Ok, I guess,” muttered Lion, still upset that he did not receive an instrument.
That evening, Eldred and the animals worked long into the night, as they learned to play together. Gertrude learned how to hold her small flute without breaking it, Monkey and Snake sort of learned to tell their instruments apart, even though no one really could tell the two of them apart. Turtle struggled with the size of the tuba at first, but he was soon blowing it with all his might. And Lion learned everything there was to know about music: timing, rhythm, tone, until he was a master. Eldred looked around proudly. In only an evening he transformed several uneducated jungle creatures into a small, but wonderful orchestra. “Now for the finishing touches,” thought Eldred, and he muttered some ancient words under his breath. The air was filled with a soft glow, and all the instruments began to shake, including Lion himself. “I put the spirit of music into each one of you, and now you will be the greatest musicians this jungle has ever known.” All the animals cheered and thanked Eldred a thousand times.
What Eldred and the animals did not know, is that a little bit of spirit was left over, and made it’s way through the forest until it found a puddle of water, a carrot, and two pieces of charcoal. The air turned cold, and the water began to harden until it was once again a snowman. But this was not the traveling musician who Lion met earlier, but a zombie musical snowman, the most fearsome of it’s kind. The zombie could hear music coming from deep in the jungle, and began to slide towards it, eager to fill it’s hunger.
Gertrude was the first to hear the strange noises coming from somewhere in the jungle. “Hey everybody, stop, what’s that sound?” “Muuuusssiiic,” something groaned, “Muuuusssiiiic.” Eldred immediately turned pale. “It can’t be, it’s not possible. I was extra careful this time.” “What’s going on?” asked Lion. “Some of the spirit must have escaped. That is the unmistakable cry of a zombie looking to devour music.” “No!” cried the animals, “We just learned it, he can’t take it away!” Just then, the zombie snowman stepped into the clearing. Snake and Monkey shrieked and threw their bows at the snowman, but it did little to stop him. “Help us Elred,” they cried, “He’s going to eat our music.” “Only Lion can help you now,” said Eldred. “he is the conductor and protector of your music.” “Me? But all you taught me was how to wave my hands around.” “Yes, you must all play your music, and Lion, direct it towards the Zombie!”
So the animals started playing their instruments, except for Snake and Monkey, who had to use Monkey as a bow. “Now send the music at the zombie, be strong!” shouted Eldred. Lion directed his hands towards the zombie, and as it got closer and closer, Lion could feel a power growing inside him. With a shout, he released all the energy and was shocked to see musical notes shooting out from his hands. They speed towards the oncoming zombie, and with a brilliant flash, he exploded into millions of pieces. The air was filled with light as the sun sparkled through the floating pieces of ice and snow. “We did it!” the animals rejoiced. “Our music saved us!” Eldred could not have been prouder. “You are all true musical greats now,” he said, looking at the animals around him, “I have taught you all I know, so now I must take my leave.” Lion and his friends stepped up to Eldred and thanked him for all they learned. “You have given us music, the greatest gift of all,” said Lion, as Eldred turned and disappeared into the jungle.
"
Man, what a messed up story. First the titular character dies then this asshole jack-in-the-box shows up and calls the lion stupid for seemingly no reason then you bring the snowman back to life only freaking gib him.
Why do zombie snowmen hunger? What do they hunger for?! Why does the spirit of music create zombies from water?!! WHY DOES ZOMBIE SNOWMAN NOT ALSO MELT LIKE THE ORIGINAL SNOWMAN??!
You story has left me terrified and confused about the nature of the world and the creatures that are in it.
The zombie snowman stuff is incredibly bizarre. I'm not certain any parent is going to want to let their young kids read a story about any kind of living dead, snowmen included.
" The "Musical Snowman" is the name of a sexual maneuver... I'm not sure if you were aware of this before you wrote the book. It's when someone fiddles around with your cock as if they're playing a flute and then eventually you come onto their head and face, making them resemble a snowman. "I love how you know that lol
And ya ur diction seems a little advanced for the age of kids that would be entertained by this book fyi
" The "Musical Snowman" is the name of a sexual maneuver... I'm not sure if you were aware of this before you wrote the book. "Isn't that true of most words in the English language though?
Instant Classic! I can teach my kids about the death of snowmen, zombies, music, and talking animals.
That wasn't good. In fact, it was so bad I'm going to assume you're trolling. However, I have some shitty highschool homework assignments to procrastinate on, so here's how you can improve it:
I'd write more, but frankly, the story reminds me of intentionally awful fanfic, and not the good kind. If you're serious about getting it published, why not try rewriting it? Add some questions, and assume it'd be read aloud. Even so, check your grammar because it's just plain terrible. It's is a contraction meaning "it is". Its is possessive.
Also that is a lot of story, seems like that could easily spread into 30 or so pages at least. You don't put a lot of text per page because the kids want to see the pretty pictures while they are reading or being read the story. The part about magnificant waterfalls and the trees and stuff could each have their own page, thats a common childrens book concept, you just go "...and they saw magnificant waterfalls," *picture of pretty waterfalls* / next page "and giant flowers" *picture of giant flowers*, etc etc. Kids really love that kind of stuff too, and itl pad out your book nicely.
From the way you wrote it, It seems more like they saw those things in the same area, but I would recommend thinking in a more page and picture oriented fashion, and rewording it slightly. You should go plan out what every page of the book will look like, even if you have no artistic talent you need to consider how its going to look, so go make a powerpoint with each slide being a page, write the text at the bottom and have a description of the scene at the top. See how many pages you come up with.
The story itself is pretty solid, but I think you wrote it more as a children's short story than a children's book. Just think about every children's book you have seen as a kid, the stories are very simple but the pictures are what really holds your attention. So you need to make sure your story can have lots of pictures.
As far as finding an artist, go on kijiji and look locally for an artist, ask them to submit some work samples, or do that on here too.
You should also delete your post of the story and get PMs to remove any quotes of it in here too. You don't want to get your shit stolen, not that people here would care enough to do that, but still, thats the last thing you want. You should be careful about showing off the writing portion and also be careful if you find a potential partner, if you don't know them personally, they could just steal your shit. So yeah, things to consider! Find someone trustworthy and be careful, itd be way easier if you knew someone personally that could do it.
Also I don't know much about publishing, but that is sort of the easy part, if you have a good book people will want to publish it. You can just look online or locally for publishers, there are companies that do it. Again though, only show them a sample at first. Your work is your baby, copyright it and keep all the original documents and work on it. People steal other people's ideas every day. Stay safe and careful!
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