stop telling me to not be offended please

this is a response to that hitman topic obviously, but there's a larger issue here; people not looking at things from others' perspectives.

Like, if I had to guess, most of the people here are:

straight

white

PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT OF THE TRANSSEXUAL PERSUASION

male

Nothing wrong with that! I'm not trying to blame those people whom fall under this umbrella, and I'm not saying that people who don't fall under this umbrella don't do this either. but there is a large contingent of people saying "well, don't be offended at this terrible fucking thing!". It's easy not to be offended when it doesn't personally offend YOU. Do I get super offended at gay people being called that word we are not to say? Not nearly as much; I do, but not to a point where I would get super fucking mad about it. However, I do understand why it's so terrible and I can sympathize with the pain it can bring (I like how we can say tranny all we want and people on this site have even said such a thing though hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa).

However, what can I say to a straight white man that really offends him because of those attributes? cracker, honky? breeder, het scum? prick? Do these words legitimate offend any of you? I mean it's a difference if you're a white man in like china or somethin. It's like, how about you try and look from different perspectives before saying "don't be offended", because for some it can be very hard not to be; and for some it is very easy. Some people are more emotional than others and are offended more easily.

and those slippery slope arguments are fun too! "Well if they take out this offensive dialogue and then they'll tkae this slightly less offensive dialogue out and soon all we'll have is PONG!" or fucking whatever. Honestly, I don't care if a character is personally transphobic; just don't make that out to be a good thing, or at the very least make it relevant to the story. Don't just throw in a "HAHA THAT NPC WANTED TO GET WITH THAT GIRL BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY A DUDE" That is not only offensive, it is also a terrible joke and literally has no purpose. There was mildly transphobic dialogue in Catherine, at the end, but guess what? I literally never complained about that because it was relevant to the story, it was done tastefully all the way up until then, and it was not immediately hateful. It made sense. but some were offended by it, and i respected their opinion.

All I'm saying, is there are many different types of people on this earth; try considering THEIR perspective before telling them they shouldn't be offended.

this is a response to that hitman topic obviously, but there's a larger issue here; people not looking at things from others' perspectives.

Like, if I had to guess, most of the people here are:

straight

white

PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT OF THE TRANSSEXUAL PERSUASION

male

Nothing wrong with that! I'm not trying to blame those people whom fall under this umbrella, and I'm not saying that people who don't fall under this umbrella don't do this either. but there is a large contingent of people saying "well, don't be offended at this terrible fucking thing!". It's easy not to be offended when it doesn't personally offend YOU. Do I get super offended at gay people being called that word we are not to say? Not nearly as much; I do, but not to a point where I would get super fucking mad about it. However, I do understand why it's so terrible and I can sympathize with the pain it can bring (I like how we can say tranny all we want and people on this site have even said such a thing though hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa).

However, what can I say to a straight white man that really offends him because of those attributes? cracker, honky? breeder, het scum? prick? Do these words legitimate offend any of you? I mean it's a difference if you're a white man in like china or somethin. It's like, how about you try and look from different perspectives before saying "don't be offended", because for some it can be very hard not to be; and for some it is very easy. Some people are more emotional than others and are offended more easily.

and those slippery slope arguments are fun too! "Well if they take out this offensive dialogue and then they'll tkae this slightly less offensive dialogue out and soon all we'll have is PONG!" or fucking whatever. Honestly, I don't care if a character is personally transphobic; just don't make that out to be a good thing, or at the very least make it relevant to the story. Don't just throw in a "HAHA THAT NPC WANTED TO GET WITH THAT GIRL BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY A DUDE" That is not only offensive, it is also a terrible joke and literally has no purpose. There was mildly transphobic dialogue in Catherine, at the end, but guess what? I literally never complained about that because it was relevant to the story, it was done tastefully all the way up until then, and it was not immediately hateful. It made sense. but some were offended by it, and i respected their opinion.

All I'm saying, is there are many different types of people on this earth; try considering THEIR perspective before telling them they shouldn't be offended.

Yea, I'm not a fan of those arguments, either. It amounts to nothing more than, "Just control your goddamn emotional state. How hard can that be? I mean, what can innocent little me do? Be careful of what I say to people? ARE YOU MAD!?". Or something like that.

You're right, of course, but gaming has proven to be more reluctant to consider anything other than heteronormative standards than most media. I expect we'll need trans sitcom characters before mainstream games can tackle them. Also Hitman's story and characters are a bunch of crass bullshit, so, if anything, you should be offended for having to sit through any of that.

I'm so offended right now.

@Animasta said:

cis

Please don't use this term to describe us.

@Chumm said:

I expect we'll need trans sitcom characters before mainstream games can tackle them.

Erica Anderson from Catherine. It's obviously not common, but I'm saying it's been tackled at least once in recent times.

Then again, I guess one could argue Catherine isn't mainstream despite its popularity.

As far as I can remember, I'm never a part of these discussions, but I wanna put my input here anyway.

Full disclosure, I fit the criteria you listed. But the way I see it, it's all about intention. If something is meant to be offensive, then sure, get offended. But if something isn't meant to be offensive..well..I guess being offended is ok, but there's no reason to get angry about it.

@Animasta said:

cis

What a terrible slur.

But I guess since I'm a straight, white male who doesn't want to lop my johnson off, my opinion doesn't matter.

The term "cis" is an actual thing? I'm offended by that, I think.

Uh oh, we're going down this path again.

Oh, lol. I'm sure you mean well, but...

Stop getting all offended.

"I have no idea what context is so I'm gonna pretend to be offended by a word in an attempt to make a point about how no one should ever be offended by anything ever."

Christ, you're predictable.

Pretty hard to take people seriously when they spend so much time getting offended. Especially when they are willingly partaking in what pisses them off.

This should be interesting. *grabs popcorn*

What the hell is 'cis'? I've never heard of any kind of insult or categorisation like that.

@Pierre42: Short for cisgender. Basically the opposite of transgender.

It's not an insult >_>

@Pierre42 said:

What the hell is 'cis'? I've never heard of any kind of insult or categorisation like that.

It's a term for anyone who isn't trans.

It's a straight person's "tranny" and I'm very offended that Animasta would use such flagrant hate speech on this website.

generally when i ask someone to get less offended, it's a plea for them to reconsider their perspective because (i think) their emotions or preconceived notions are clouding their judgment.

this thread is attempting to address much larger social issues that resonate waaay outside of videogames and associated bullshit. but i guess i can afford to not get on people's cases so much if that's what OP wants

@MindOST said:

"I have no idea what context is so I'm gonna pretend to be offended by a word in an attempt to make a point about how no one should ever be offended by anything ever."

I think it was more about pointing out the inconsistency of arguing for tolerance and kindness while unwittingly using a bigoted vocabulary to do so. There was no context to absolve the use of the term, unlike the "cracker, honky? breeder, het scum? prick?" line which were merely examples. In fact, the exclusion of cis from that list is evidence that he finds its use completely appropriate when it's no less offensive than any other gender issue terminology. Only difference being that people of such nature are secure with their sexual orientation.

@MindOST said:

"I have no idea what context is so I'm gonna pretend to be offended by a word in an attempt to make a point about how no one should ever be offended by anything ever."

Internet...Internet never changes.

You have a right to be offended but you do not have a right to not be offended. Also you don't have the right that people care that you took offense to something.

@breton said:

@Animasta said:

cis

Please don't use this term to describe us.

What does this mean? I'm offended, but only because its not an actual word that I can put a reference too

I feel as with almost every issue, the truth, the real solution, lands somewhere in the middle ground.

On one had, yes, you absolutely have the right to be offended. We, as people, should be sensitive to the issues others take personally, even if they don't offend us ourselves. Making degrading jokes about groups of others purely because they're different is tasteless.

On the other hand, there are definitely cases where we need to thicken up our skin a little. We all have something that can be potentially offensive. Are you fat? You don't want to play Persona 4, as Hanako (the fat chick's) ugliness is a running gag, Yosuke is terrified at the prospect of dating her because of her weight. Are you female? We've got entire threads devoted to sexist content in games. Hell, are you a Christian? You should probably just leave Giantbomb right now, as they utter the phrase "Jesus Christ" in vain every day, and that's (traditionally, at least) blasphemous. Sometimes you just have to say to yourself "Yeah, that's offensive, but I don't need to take this personally" and move on.

I like how half the people in the comments are being assholes, and the other half are sitting back and watching others being assholes. Also, what's "cis" supposed to mean? I tried looking it up, but the definitions were a bit technical.

Your whole post just reminded me of this and Anna Anthropy's Twitter feed

@Video_Game_King said:

I like how half the people in the comments are being assholes, and the other half are sitting back and watching others being assholes. Also, what's "cis" supposed to mean? I tried looking it up, but the definitions were a bit technical.

Cocks in skirts was all I could think of.

@Video_Game_King said:

I like how half the people in the comments are being assholes, and the other half are sitting back and watching others being assholes. Also, what's "cis" supposed to mean? I tried looking it up, but the definitions were a bit technical.

A person who identifies with the gender they were born with.

People can say whatever they want. Should they say certain things? I don't think so. Will they? Yep.

That's the price you pay for living with freedom of speech.

You have every right to get offended.

But when you make ridiculous threads over every little thing you find disagreeable, people have the right to tell you to shut up as well.

@langbogen said:

And to TOP all of this, you are one of those people who get offended by a JOKE? No seriously, there are people everywhere in the world getting TORTURED AND KILLED for being who they are, and you have the NERVE to complain about a JOKE?

Yea, who the fuck does she think she is, getting offended by a joke? Ugh. Let's worry about racist-jokes.info (an actual website) after we've taken care of genocide and other grand problems. I mean, it's not like comedy has ever been a vehicle for serious social commentary, or like we can split our resources on multiple ventures effectively.

As a straight white male apparently I can't be offended so I find it hard to empathize with those who do. Is tranny an offensive term to transsexuals? I had no idea so if I've used it at some point sorry I guess. Why do you feel the need to attach a blog to the forums related to anything you take issue with in a thread? Why not discuss it there?

"Don't be offended" is always a phrase that strikes me as rather ignorant. We certainly don't have the right to police people's speech, but we also don't have the right to police people's feelings.

@YI_Orange I don't know what this thread is specifically in response to, but context has little relevance when it comes to most hate speech. Or perhaps more accurately, there's a lot of context people don't stop to consider. There are broader implications of the use of hate speech and slurs based on the context of both history and privilege. Immediate context is almost irrelevant when you consider the wider context of that kind of speech.

@Video_Game_King said:

I like how half the people in the comments are being assholes, and the other half are sitting back and watching others being assholes. Also, what's "cis" supposed to mean? I tried looking it up, but the definitions were a bit technical.

Cis is a term from chemistry, where the only relevance to this discussion is that its the opposite to trans. Its basically whether identical groups are on the same side of a bond nor not, if you imagine the axle of a car, the front and back right wheels would be cis, the front right and back left wheels would be trans. Unless there is another meaning I haven't heard off, I think this is its only meaning.

As a straight white male apparently I can't be offended so I find it hard to empathize with those who do. Is tranny an offensive term to transsexuals? I had no idea so if I've used it at some point sorry I guess. Why do you feel the need to attach a blog to the forums related to anything you take issue with in a thread? Why not discuss it there?

@Animasta:

Well, there's a few things I would like to address but first I'm sorry people are acting like dicks. Nothing is more irritating then when another tells you to not experience what you are experiencing. If you're offended then you're offended. Some idiot can say don't be offended but it really doesn't mean shit to the one who is offended. So to those that say that, shut the fuck up.

But I also think you might be hoping for a level of discourse that these forums, or any forum really, won't allow for. When push comes to shove we are all on the internet and the internet is full of assholes and pseudo-comedians. What I try to keep in mind when I really get worked up and engage in a serious discussion here is that a) no one will change their minds about a topic because that would make that child feel like they are somehow fucked in the head by acting mature and changing their mind b) it really, really doesn't matter if some one is an idiot on here because their opinion doesn't matter and the general topic won't be solved by us and c) fuck it, it's the internet.

I know that's all sort of cold comfort when you're frustrated but that's how my brain works when I get irritated on here.

Lets stop taking forums so seriously. Does some idiot with complete anonymity's opinion really bother you that much? Just ignore the prick are remind yourself that the more extreme opinions stick out on forums. By letting their opinions bother you all you are doing is ruining your day, they couldn't care less.

@JasonR86 said:

But I also think you might be hoping for a level of discourse that these forums, or any forum really, won't allow for.

I don't know. I've had some pretty cool discussions on this site (albeit limited by my own idiocy), so it's not entirely that. Besides, that's not gonna help things. Wouldn't such an attitude create a sense of apathy that would definitely worsen these problems?

The problem is being offended by things that arent really offensive, but because they involve these groups, it somehow becomes offensive. I mean do you think from all the people that worked on Hitman, not one of them was homosexual?

What does CIS even mean?

I hope you have learned much from these comments.

Man, you need to calm down, and get off your high horse.

Quit getting so offended, especially when you are arguing a strawman.

@Video_Game_King said:

@JasonR86 said:

But I also think you might be hoping for a level of discourse that these forums, or any forum really, won't allow for.

I don't know. I've had some pretty cool discussions on this site (albeit limited by my own idiocy), so it's not entirely that. Besides, that's not gonna help things. Wouldn't such an attitude create a sense of apathy that would definitely worsen these problems?

if I can reach out to one person it's all worth it

also cis is not offensive guys, it's the opposite of trans which is also not offensive

also also tranny is offensive and so is cunt but we can use that too because vinny made a funny joke once or something

also also also I don't care about people attacking me honestly, because my health is bad enough that I try to take stuff like that in stride (this topic was made because I wondered what people thought of it, nothing more).

edit: ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO I'm really not that mad I don't know why people think I am, just disappointed (though not surprised)

There are two points I would like to make, and if everyone would just remember them, always, they would be a lot happier.

1. Everyone has a right to be offended by things that offend them. Sometimes things or people are going to rub you the wrong way. All you can control is how you react.

2. No one has a right to go through life without being offended by anything. Sometimes things or people are going to rub you the wrong way. All you can control is how you react.

Personally what bothers me is people that get offended and immediately go on the offensive and automatically assumes the offender is racist/misogynistic/homophobic etc... which you certainly fall under at times.

There are ways to tell people that certain words in certain context can be offensive and automatically assuming the worst about a person's character is not the right way.

@Pr1mus said:

Personally what bothers me is people that get offended and immediately go on the offensive and automatically assumes the offender is racist/misogynistic/homophobic etc... which you certainly fall under at times.

There are ways to tell people that certain words in certain context can be offensive and automatically assuming the worst about a person's character is not the right way.

I haven't done that in a year, I admit that was a problem but I have stopped doing that

@FUMN said:

Quit getting so offended

'-_-

@Animasta said:

because my health is bad enough

?

@Animasta said:

also cis is not offensive guys, it's the opposite of trans which is also not offensive

Uhh... don't tell me not to be offended? No, really, it's offensive to me. I've heard its use one too many times in a derogatory fashion aimed towards heterosexual men and women. Might as well tell black people not be be offended by the use of the word nigger because all it really means is that they have a different skin pigmentation. No, that's not how it works.

@Animasta: Get over it.

@Animasta said:

also cis is not offensive guys, it's the opposite of trans which is also not offensive

Hypocrite.