This topic is locked from further discussion.

#101 Posted by InternetCrab (1581 posts) -

I have no idea if you are still alive or not but, just don't do it, you seem like a nice person c:

#102 Edited by Demoskinos (16145 posts) -

You may feel helpless but there have been people in worse positions than you that have pulled them selves out of the gutter. Really the first thing you need to do is start being positive. If there is one thing I've learned its life its that perspective is EVERYTHING. You can turn your life around dont opt for a permanent solution to something you can fix. You've got people here that care about you. Please find some support. There are people who dont get lucky enough to live as long as you have. Don't throw it away. <3

#103 Posted by Cyrus_Saren (552 posts) -

I don't really know what else to say that hasn't already been said. I do not really know you but I do recognize your name and avatar. From what I've seen you put, you seem a lot smarter than you give yourself credit for. We also seem to have some similar problems: I have a lack of social skills and it makes it hard for me to meet, talk and interact with people because of it. I also have problems articulating my thoughts.

Like others on here, I think you need to talk to someone. There is no reason for anyone to end their life. You seem like a caring, sympathetic person and we need more of that in this world.

#104 Edited by OfficeGamer (1120 posts) -

Listening to Elton John's I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues and reading through this thread, I got quite emotional.

I tend to be realistic and grim, maybe even pessimistic, so I won't say anything here. I hope whatever you do, that it will be the best for you. I'm not anti-suicide because nothing is black and white, but if you keep your life I hope you'll use the wise words given in this thread and try to change your outlook on life. You sound brave and generous, you just have to know how to camouflage yourself with the exterior of being an asshole, or someone who's only casually nice.. that's the only way to survive.

I'll shut up now and quote the best post on this thread:

Not sure what to say after reading that. I don't know that "don't do it" is really an effective message. "Life will get better" or "there has to be a better way" has always sounded like sweet nothings to me that people who don't understand the person in question's situation say to prevent them from doing something stupid. I feel the same way about "thinking on the bright side."

I will say, however, that it seems that you're stuck thinking about unfulfilled dreams a lot. That, I can say with 100% certainty, we all have. Unfulfilled dreams, are not, in my opinion, a proper basis for doing something as drastic as taking one's own life. "Dreams", I think, are irrelevant and if they don't happen, then they don't happen. Best to come up with new ones or refocus on potential future happiness than be stuck in the past. I hate the past.

#105 Posted by Video_Game_King (36567 posts) -

dont opt for a permanent solution to something you can fix.

Why? Isn't that a good thing? (I'm aware you're criticizing suicide, but this particular criticism is a real pet peeve of mine, since people generally don't like temporary solutions.)

#106 Edited by acethesuperhero (30 posts) -

Hey friend!

So re: suicidal ideation, I've been there. Like, I practically live there. I built a house there. And I know, I am living proof, that it is possible to get through. Tried to kill myself at fifteen and I'm still kicking. If you don't fight, kick and scream at these feelings, you're letting the game play you, is all I'm saying. So I'm going to extend a similar message that these other folks are - if you ever need anything, an ear or whatever, please PM me. I know you don't know me, hell I don't post on these boards lol, but I can assure you I'm a decent listener.

So keep fighting the good fight, milady.

Oh, by the way? You're a perfectly natural, and I'm sure incredibly beautiful, woman. :)

#107 Edited by SoldierG654342 (1863 posts) -

Having lost my brother to suicide, I feel like I would be abdicating some sort of responsibility if I didn't say something.

I don't know know of you're family or personal life, and I'm not going to lecture you on getting help, but there are people who out there who are willing to help you and that will miss you.

#108 Posted by Ghostiet (5552 posts) -

I hope there is a happy ending to this story. I really do. I'm having a terrible month. I'd like to see someone overcome her problems and climb out of her emotional gutter. I'd like to see someone pull through out of something way worse than I'm in. I hope I will. I really, really do.

#109 Posted by SerHulse (709 posts) -

@demoskinos said:

dont opt for a permanent solution to something you can fix.

Why? Isn't that a good thing? (I'm aware you're criticizing suicide, but this particular criticism is a real pet peeve of mine, since people generally don't like temporary solutions.)

I think the "permanent" part of that statement refers to the fact you can't reverse it, not how long it lasts. A better solution is one that can be adapted as times and conditions change, suicide is permanent in that you can't go back on it if the situation changes (and it inevitably will).

To better phrase it: "Don't opt for an irreversible solution to a reversible problem".

#110 Posted by MrDapper (20 posts) -

I've been in a similar place before, I was about to commit suicide and I probably would have had I not reached out for help. It can be hard to ask, but just letting other people now can really help you. I'm sorry I don't have a long inspiring post, I just saw this and felt the need to say something. I hope you reconsider.

#111 Posted by Video_Game_King (36567 posts) -
#112 Posted by JasonR86 (9998 posts) -
#113 Posted by RollingZeppelin (2269 posts) -

Just like to add my voice of support. Life is precious and ever changing, things might suck now but they'll probably get better no matter how hopeless it feels!

#114 Edited by charlie_victor_bravo (1189 posts) -

Just move. Before killing yourself, at least try to take some risks.

#115 Edited by Sanity (2045 posts) -

Hope you come back and tell us your ok, was hoping we would hear back from yea by the time i got home. Nothing is ever so bad to end your life over, things can change and i hope you can see that.

#116 Edited by Fattony12000 (7915 posts) -


So, I wrote a 2000 word reply to you regarding your opening post. I read it through several times and put a lot of thought into exactly what to say to you. Upon reflection, I figured it would be best to just ask you to talk to someone, us, professionals, friends, strangers, family, anyone; before you go ahead and take a step from which there is no coming back. There are people out there who are ready to listen, and are ready to try and help you.

You are a good person and should not rob this world of your potential before your time has come.


#117 Edited by Subjugation (4779 posts) -

@artemesia: I've been where you are. My problem wasn't dealing with being transgendered, it was coming to terms with having a chronic disease that doesn't have a cure. I had become so sick (literally and figuratively) and so depressed at the fact that I would never be rid of this burden that I almost did something terrible and foolish. I just about had everything set up when I just stopped in my tracks. I don't know what you're like, but I am a religious person so I believe that had a lot to do with what happened in that moment. I had a wave of thoughts crash over me about the consequences of what I was about to do. I would be throwing so much away. I had my entire life ahead of me. My friends and family would be devastated. I was being selfish. Furthermore, I realized I was not alone. I am not the only person with this condition, and you are not the only person in your own situation. I found hope in seeing others like me leading successful, happy lives, they just had to work a little bit harder. I believe that you too can lead a happy, successful life, you just may have to work a little harder.

Life is full of tests and trials. That is what it is all about. Our purpose is to learn and grow. Part of that is adapting to our circumstances. Everyone has problems, whether it be physical, mental, financial, or otherwise. We also have the tools and the strength to bear our burdens. You are going through the Refiner's fire and will come out better for it. So many wonderful moments lay in store for you, so please don't do anything that would prevent you from being able to realize them.

Please seek counsel and help from those qualified to give it, but if you aren't comfortable with that you are more than welcome to PM me.

#118 Posted by Jeff (5264 posts) -

I'd like to thank those of you that have chipped in with some great comments, whether it's about the situation at hand or how it maps back to your own lives. At some point, though, we have to lock this for safety purposes and reach out through other means. Let's hope that Artemesia is safe.

If you're thinking about hurting yourself, please contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.