Posted by KnifeySpoony (1167 posts) -

I mean dumb. After hearing the bombcrew talk about this movie from 2004, I had to rent it for myself as I'd never been exposed to the creation, "from the same producer as The Fast & Furious and XXX." I mention the year as this piece of cinema history places itself in time quite well. The appearance of Dane Cook and Nickelback playing at the happy ride off into the sunset in particular.

I'll be honest I rented this with the idea that I'd be under the influence of something, and it did help with the experience. Some things about it are so profound. Should I spoiler it? No probably not. There's crotch rocket lancing between two women. Crotch rocket lancing. There's some of the dumbest CG effects I've seen. It's splendid, a masterpiece, but damn stupid.There's also the idea of Ice Cube being the leader of a gang that all rides these sport bikes. It just doesn't seem fathomable to me. He would have been much better suited to one of the Fast and Furious movies. Apologies if he was, I don't really remember. Personally I feel that Jaime Pressley should have been awarded an Oscar for her performance of, "hardcore female who licks the side of her mouth in every shot and says nothing."

Anyone else have anything to say on this piece of movie history? Stories of theatre experiences or perhaps the trouble they got into with motorcycles after the fact?

Oh also isn't crystal meth not that expensive? I think it's hilarious that that's the main drug that this main villain wants back so bad and not cocaine. Maybe he's got a hefty fix in the home life. Maybe that's why Jaime Pressley keeps licking her mouth. Poor girl needs to go into rehab.

OH MAN AND THE DUDE'S NAME IS FORD AND HIS GIRLFRIEND SHANE WHAT THE FUCK!?

#1 Posted by Pr1mus (3959 posts) -

That movie sounds great. I should watch that.

#2 Posted by Blu3V3nom07 (4294 posts) -

Its just as dumb, as when I went to go see it at the drive-in, way back when. Too-o bad I couldn't drink beer, back when..

#3 Posted by Yummylee (22280 posts) -

So... is Torque perhaps more Crank dumb more than, say, Shoot 'Em Up dumb? The way Jeff keeps raving about how DUMMMMBBBBBBBBBBBB it is if anything makes me want to keep a fair distance between me and this movie. Then again Jeff thinks just about everything is dumb, so it's sometimes difficult to gauge if this could be the sort of dumb that's entertaining.

#4 Posted by Cloudenvy (5891 posts) -

Torque is a fantastic movie and you should all be ashamed if you haven't watched it!

#5 Posted by joshthebear (2700 posts) -

It's suuuuper dumb, but in the best ways possible.

#6 Edited by KnifeySpoony (1167 posts) -

@yummylee: Not sure what this gauge is for. I love the Crank movies but I also enjoyed the hell out of Shoot 'Em Up in the theatres. Nothing beats Crank 2 in terms of intensity of dumb and crazy for me I think. I'd say it's probably more Crank then..probably...and Fast & Furious.

Also I just remembered this when a white dude fighting Ice Cube gets hung by a chain and he says "Ain't that ironic." GOD DAMN I LOST IT