Valentine's Day zingers - Off-Topic

#1 Posted by thebipsnbeeps (480 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

Do you guys and gals have any lovey-dovey one-liners that you can come up with for Valentine's Day cards?

As a fan of hokey simplicity, I thought about making a card that said "I dig you" with a shovel drawn in a person.

#2 Posted by Cloudenvy (5770 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

@thebipsnbeeps said:

with a shovel drawn in a person.

Oh god.

#3 Posted by buft (3170 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

In a person? thats gonna be awkward on the mantelpiece of her/his house but i do like a funny card

#4 Posted by IzzyGraze (818 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

I choo-choo-choose you with a picture of a train.

#5 Posted by BBAlpert (705 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

@IzzyGraze said:

I choo-choo-choose you with a picture of a train.

"Look in the tunk"

#6 Posted by punkxblaze (2460 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

I prefer a direct approach, so I just elect to give women pictures out of porno magazines.

...I haven't had a valentines date in so long ;_;.

#7 Posted by GalacticGravy (435 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

"Are you an angel? Cause you got nice cans."

Nah but really, I like the classic from Happy Days.

Draw three pictures. An eye, a heart, and a sheep.

A female sheep is a "ewe"

#8 Posted by Marcsman (2464 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

Do you know what the bird of love is?

"the swallow"

#9 Posted by HaltIamReptar (2027 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

@Marcsman: Haven't heard that one before. Small laugh.

#10 Posted by WickedFather (1485 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

You're gorgeous... I bet you've had loads of abortions.

#11 Posted by crusader8463 (13168 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

Just pull out your junk. If he/she doesn't hit you, scream, or run away keep it out and see where the night takes ya.

#12 Posted by Stonyman65 (1840 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

"my dick's like chocolate baby, you know you want it in your mouth"

#13 Posted by Iodine (357 posts) - 4 months, 17 days ago

@thebipsnbeeps said:

Do you guys and gals have any lovey-dovey one-liners that you can come up with for Valentine's Day cards?
As a fan of hokey simplicity, I thought about making a card that said "I dig you" with a shovel drawn in a person.

This is terrifying