I didn't read the whole thread, so I apologize if this has already been stated.
Gift-giving for wimmenz is an art-form. It takes a mixture of listening-skills, thoughtfulness, critical thinking, and both planning and spontaneity. The most basic route for effective gift-giving is to fill a practical need. Does she need something to perform a necessary task? Does she complain a lot about a specific process that could be eased with a moderately-priced gift? For example, my last girlfriend complained constantly of not having a food processor, as she wanted to make salsa or whatever. Easy gift.
The next level plays off of nostalgia, memories and history. Another example, my last girlfriend and I hung out at a coffeeshouse a lot before we dated, and she would try a different tea everytime. So my first gift to her was a collection of those teas she enjoyed most. That took translating a memory into a gift. Very thoughtful, and women LOVE it. You've only been dating a few months, but I bet you already have some in-jokes or cool memories/experiences that you could play off of into a thoughtful gift.
And if you can COMBINE these two approaches, then that's even better. My last girlfriend did for me by buying me a set of juggling balls and instructional materials. My inability to juggle was a constant in-joke between us, AND I really wanted to learn how to juggle. It was great.
I don't have specific suggestions for you, just concepts to keep in mind. The best gifts come from really knowing the person, and considering your relationship and dynamic. Good luck.
" Okay from a girl's perspective: Tickets to a nice event (shows you have forethought and planning skills to think ahead, and that since you thought ahead you plan on sticking with her a little while longer at least) Take her vehicle to get it detailed inside and out (women are busy too, and this would be such a thoughtful gesture) If you must get the Hello Kitty stuff, get a little change purse or wallet and put a heartfelt letter inside (and don't ask us here what to write in the letter ;O) The time you put into a gift is more important than the price. Make it special, since this is your first Christmas together. "
Hmmmm, that 1st one is a nice perspective into the female mind. Thanks.
i't s not all tangible goods man. do something nice, think about it. take her to a nice show. that's what i did for my mum, and i got to third base. merry christmas dude.
" I'm not sure a nurse wants a "HEY LOOK I'M A NURSE" kind of gift even if she loves her job and takes is seriously.I'm a teacher, and I certainly don't want a cheesy teacher sweatshirt or an apple watch. Just sayin' "
Then I can assume you don't know many Nurses! ;) Haha, like its been said - we don't know her so any of these suggestions could be valid. But, if they've only been dating a short time then I'd get her something light-hearted but, thoughtful. If Ihmishylie is asking on this forum when we can safely assume he's got NO IDEA what to get her. Stuff like perfume is a bit cliched and sort of 'loaded' and a bit 'Hey, you're a girl, you must like perfume, hereyago!'. If she's a Nurse, then I can tell you from being a Nurse myself (and dated enough Nurses to know), its incredibly important to her and if he shows that he understands that it's a safe bet for a light-hearted but thoughtful present. That's the way I'd go.
" I didn't read the whole thread, so I apologize if this has already been stated. Gift-giving for wimmenz is an art-form. It takes a mixture of listening-skills, thoughtfulness, critical thinking, and both planning and spontaneity. The most basic route for effective gift-giving is to fill a practical need. Does she need something to perform a necessary task? Does she complain a lot about a specific process that could be eased with a moderately-priced gift? For example, my last girlfriend complained constantly of not having a food processor, as she wanted to make salsa or whatever. Easy gift. The next level plays off of nostalgia, memories and history. Another example, my last girlfriend and I hung out at a coffeeshouse a lot before we dated, and she would try a different tea everytime. So my first gift to her was a collection of those teas she enjoyed most. That took translating a memory into a gift. Very thoughtful, and women LOVE it. You've only been dating a few months, but I bet you already have some in-jokes or cool memories/experiences that you could play off of into a thoughtful gift. And if you can COMBINE these two approaches, then that's even better. My last girlfriend did for me by buying me a set of juggling balls and instructional materials. My inability to juggle was a constant in-joke between us, AND I really wanted to learn how to juggle. It was great. I don't have specific suggestions for you, just concepts to keep in mind. The best gifts come from really knowing the person, and considering your relationship and dynamic. Good luck. "
QFT .
Inside jokes are the best. Or if she ever mentions things that are "important to her". Not that women should be allowed opinions, but meh. I don't write the rules!
@Pox22: I also disagree with you. I personally think that girls want you to plan the shit out of everything, but make it seem like it's spontaneous. Just like (and this is literally straight from the horse's mouth) they want you to groom yourself, but they don't want to be able to tell. Specifically, the girls were talking about eyebrows. They said that they hate unibrows, but that they didn't like guys whose eyebrows looked plucked, either.
" I'm a gay dude, which basically makes me a women. And if you cared for me, I would tell you not to spend a lot of money, which means you should. But it's not about what the gift is. It's more about the love you show as you get it. For example. Got a necklace? Best have a story behind it. Perfume? Tell her, even tho you got her this perfume bottle, you love smelling her just the way she is. Something like that Hope this helps duder "
" @Pox22: I also disagree with you. I personally think that girls want you to plan the shit out of everything, but make it seem like it's spontaneous. Just like (and this is literally straight from the horse's mouth) they want you to groom yourself, but they don't want to be able to tell. Specifically, the girls were talking about eyebrows. They said that they hate unibrows, but that they didn't like guys whose eyebrows looked plucked, either. "
Yeah, the sort of people who want you to be in terrific shape but not diet or work out like a maniac. People like that can go fuck themselves.
My homies here have a suggestion. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhwbxEfy7fg
On a serious note though, the best we'd be able to suggest is either comedic (attempted or otherwise) things or just generic things. Generic things are fine but they obviously are just that, generic. Since you've been dating this girl for a while, think about the things she likes and what she likes to do and figure out a gift that fits into that.
Jewelry usually goes over pretty well though but seeing as you're working on a limited budget, that might not work for you.
@Ihmishylje: Depends on what she likes. Get her something she would like, not something you think a girl would like.
I'm getting my gf an accordion this Christmas, for example.
Past gifts include: Telescope (so we could look at the stars together), lingerie, a PS3, art books, tickets to a play, a vintage camera, a customized sleeping bag with a stitched quote of her favorite song, a mix-tape, a pet bunny,a DVD set of her favorite director (Woody Allen), some sweet kicks; clothes are always nice if you have a strong sense of fashion. A nice warm jacket/hoodie for the winter season, attached with a cheesy note saying something about keeping her warm, would be suitable.
" I didn't read the whole thread, so I apologize if this has already been stated. Gift-giving for wimmenz is an art-form. It takes a mixture of listening-skills, thoughtfulness, critical thinking, and both planning and spontaneity. The most basic route for effective gift-giving is to fill a practical need. Does she need something to perform a necessary task? Does she complain a lot about a specific process that could be eased with a moderately-priced gift? For example, my last girlfriend complained constantly of not having a food processor, as she wanted to make salsa or whatever. Easy gift. The next level plays off of nostalgia, memories and history. Another example, my last girlfriend and I hung out at a coffeeshouse a lot before we dated, and she would try a different tea everytime. So my first gift to her was a collection of those teas she enjoyed most. That took translating a memory into a gift. Very thoughtful, and women LOVE it. You've only been dating a few months, but I bet you already have some in-jokes or cool memories/experiences that you could play off of into a thoughtful gift. And if you can COMBINE these two approaches, then that's even better. My last girlfriend did for me by buying me a set of juggling balls and instructional materials. My inability to juggle was a constant in-joke between us, AND I really wanted to learn how to juggle. It was great. I don't have specific suggestions for you, just concepts to keep in mind. The best gifts come from really knowing the person, and considering your relationship and dynamic. Good luck. "
This is probably the best /most useful advice you'll get from this thread. Gift giving, in itself, is hard, Gift giving for someone that's important, is even harder. It really is an art form you have to hone. And it never gets any easier- especially when you start to run out of ideas.
Can't go wrong with pampering services like pedicure, manicure or massage. Also jewelery is always a winner..doesn't have to be anything expensive. A nice anklet or earings perhaps?
" Jared Leto. What girl doesn't what Jared Leto? "
Nom nom nom. In a box!
Get her anything. I'd vote jewelery and a box of chocolates. Doesn't have to be expensive considering you haven't been together too long, so nothing sentimental. Something pretty from an accessory section in a girly store maybe. I mean that'd do it really, but you already know you're onto a winner with the chocolates so can't go wrong with them, but anything thoughtful would be appreciated I think .
Oh and about the perfume. If she already wears a certain kind, you're best either getting that one, taking her shopping for one or not getting one at all.
Honestly getting girls gifts is very difficult, because a lot of the things they want (clothes, jewelry, perfume, shoes, etc.) tend to have a lot of personal taste involved in their selection. It's never a good idea for a man to foray into those fields, as they will wear something they hate out of guilt, which is kind of a shitty feeling for everyone involved.
That being said, the best thing to do is to get something like tickets to a show of some sort (not necessarily like theater or anything, maybe a concert or some lecture she wants to go to) or just going with a nice dinner. There are many many easy meals that look like they took way more effort to make than they did, and really, it's the thought that counts here. Showing that you like her is more important that showing her that you can read her wants and needs like an instruction manual.
Basically anything that creates and experience between you two is the way to do it, even if it doesn't seem girly. I dated a girl for a year and our first date was sky diving. Not the girliest thing in the world, but hell was it fun. Go-karting is cheap, so is paintball. Girls like adrenaline as much as guys do.
Best part of all of those things, none of them are mutually exclusive with your dick in a box. Best served with dessert.
While jewelry might be a good idea for most women, from my experience it really depends on how "high-maintenance" she is. If you see her wearing jewelry all of the time, then yes, probably a good idea. If all she ever wears is earrings though, that might be a bad choice - and an expensive one at that. Same thing with flowers - if she has told you in the past she loves them, then go for it, but I've come across more than a handful of girls in my circle of friends (myself included) that would much rather have a tangible, lasting item, than flowers that will die in a few days. Yes, they're pretty, but they're a waste of money ultimately.
General rule of thumb, unless she's a chef or has a freakish love of cleaning, don't buy her anything for housework or to use in the kitchen. Don't buy her anything she has to pour more money into (something that needs refills, or extra accessories) unless she specifically asks for them. And if she complains about her weight, don't buy chocolates. Don't tell her WHY you didn't buy them - just avoid it. That way, you also avoid the whole "Aww, these chocolates are yummy, but they go straight to my hips" conversation.
" @Pox22: I also disagree with you. I personally think that girls want you to plan the shit out of everything, but make it seem like it's spontaneous. Just like (and this is literally straight from the horse's mouth) they want you to groom yourself, but they don't want to be able to tell. Specifically, the girls were talking about eyebrows. They said that they hate unibrows, but that they didn't like guys whose eyebrows looked plucked, either. "
Yeah, the sort of people who want you to be in terrific shape but not diet or work out like a maniac. People like that can go fuck themselves. "
Well, yeah, sort of. They weren't really like that. I think it's just that girls in general want you to do simple grooming things to make yourself look nice, but they don't want to be able to tell that you've done it.
So you're basically supposed to put the effort in, without showing that you put the effort in. Kind of like an editor's job: you know it's done right when you can't tell it's done at all.
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