chemistry because you can have shared interest, however that's more like a friend. Then again that's how some ppl meets and goes out with each other because they are both pot heads and share common interest, like getting high.
" People with shared interests usually have Chemistry... "
thats what i was thinking. isnt it pretty much the same thing when you're already in a relation ship? "
But what is more important? I've seen many relationships suffer after a time when the chemistry wears out between the two and they don't actually have much in common. They just end up doing things seperately and eventually parting ways.
" People with shared interests usually have Chemistry... "
thats what i was thinking. isnt it pretty much the same thing when you're already in a relation ship? "
But what is more important? I've seen many relationships suffer after a time when the chemistry wears out between the two and they don't actually have much in common. They just end up doing things seperately and eventually parting ways. "
in my relationship i have both chemistry and similar interests, and i cant even begin to imagine how one could be without the other. those two things go hand in hand most of the times
I went with shared interests. Look at it this way, chemistry is nice and all, but it can wear out, where, on the other hand, if you have a girl/guy who likes some of the things you do, you hit things off right away, have something to talk about and tease and get better at together. Yea, shared interests indeed.
" I went with shared interests. Look at it this way, chemistry is nice and all, but it can wear out, where, on the other hand, if you have a girl/guy who likes some of the things you do, you hit things off right away, have something to talk about and tease and get better at together. Yea, shared interests indeed. Also, "sex" is a shared interest ;) "
Shared interests, since otherwise, she'd most likely destroy my video games, and any sense of chemistry with it. Of course, this is assuming that one of her interests is me, which is assuming a lot.
" I went with shared interests. Look at it this way, chemistry is nice and all, but it can wear out, where, on the other hand, if you have a girl/guy who likes some of the things you do, you hit things off right away, have something to talk about and tease and get better at together. Yea, shared interests indeed. Also, "sex" is a shared interest ;) "
But isn't that just a friend? I chosed chem. "
See, this thread says "What's more important in a relationship?" Friendship is a relationship. So yea, even friends with shared interests are better then chemistry IMO.
" I went with shared interests. Look at it this way, chemistry is nice and all, but it can wear out, where, on the other hand, if you have a girl/guy who likes some of the things you do, you hit things off right away, have something to talk about and tease and get better at together. Yea, shared interests indeed. Also, "sex" is a shared interest ;) "
But isn't that just a friend? I chosed chem. "
See, this thread says "What's more important in a relationship?" Friendship is a relationship. So yea, even friends with shared interests are better then chemistry IMO. "
yeah but with the options id think this is pretty much geared towards a dating relationship.
" I went with shared interests. Look at it this way, chemistry is nice and all, but it can wear out, where, on the other hand, if you have a girl/guy who likes some of the things you do, you hit things off right away, have something to talk about and tease and get better at together. Yea, shared interests indeed. Also, "sex" is a shared interest ;) "
I think these would be better if they were once a week, not every day.
Personally, I'd say "Chemistry", mainly because I already know what I like -- not a huge fan of sharing those things -- so I want to experience new things and vice versa with the person. Too much familiarity becomes boring after a while.
ie. something that keeps people together regardless of the situation. Otherwise everyone and anyone who likes video games (or another shared interest) would be an ideal partner...
Here's the thing friends, family, girlfriend/boyfriend etc etc even co-worker. Both aspects are what really makes a relationship of any sort special, but I do think chemistry is more important then shared interests simply because as the saying goes opposites attract, this would not be true without chemistry.
The word "Mutual" itself. Mutual love, care, trust, respect, tenderness.. etc If both have the same feelings, then the relationship could work. If not, then you better to look for someone who shares with you her/his feelings.
"because as the saying goes opposites attract, this would not be true without chemistry. "
but what about the saying "birds of a feather flock together"? "
Ooo very interesting. I do agree that I think you need both to some degree. But the question is about what you think is MORE important.
@AussieBomb said:
" Here's the thing friends, family, girlfriend/boyfriend etc etc even co-worker. Both aspects are what really makes a relationship of any sort special, but I do think chemistry is more important then shared interests simply because as the saying goes opposites attract, this would not be true without chemistry. "
I've always disagreed with the whole "opposites attract" thing. And at least for the people I know where opposites did attract, they didn't last long.
@CaptainObvious said:
" Where is my smartass option C? "
I'm not a fan of smart-assery, so you don't get your vote C! ;)
@BeachThunder said:
" Isn't chemistry the only answer :|
ie. something that keeps people together regardless of the situation. Otherwise everyone and anyone who likes video games (or another shared interest) would be an ideal partner...
BTW, I'm going to marry everyone on this website <3
"
Interesting point. But my brother and his going on five or six-years girlfriend have great chemistry, but they don't share a ton of similar interests. I think they have enough to sustain them, but I can also see it being a reason for them drifting, especially since she is highly intellectual and way into schooling, and my bro. is the opposite (he's smart, but he's not booksmart, suffers from dyslexia, and always struggled in school and with basic reading and spelling. Much less math). So while I agree that chemistry has kept them going strong and good for as long as it has (not that they haven't had bumps, but they've dated longer than some/most people are married), I could also see a lack of shared interests being they're downfall. Hopefully not though, but I think part of the problem is that they don't put enough effort into sharing each other's interests as I think they should. Then again, Jenn has been playing video games more lately, so that's a plus! :P
@Bruce said:
" I think these would be better if they were once a week, not every day. Personally, I'd say "Chemistry", mainly because I already know what I like -- not a huge fan of sharing those things -- so I want to experience new things and vice versa with the person. Too much familiarity becomes boring after a while. "
This is also a very good point. And I think that is a genuine opinion, and some people wouldn't have it any other way. I think it's very valid and all the more power to you. As far posting them once a week, I honestly don't post enough to consider doing it only once a week. I want to see how long I can keep it going, and it gives me a reason to come back everyday and get more involved. Thanks for the input though :)
Here is what my mom says, she's been married going on 30 years now.
"Chemistry ends, interests don't. So, I'd say interests. :)"
" Interests. I think chemistry means very little if you have nothing in common. "
This is it. Love can evolve from friendship. Not every relationship needs to remain stuck in "the friend zone". Spending time with a person who shares the same interests creates greater opportunities for intimate feelings to develop. This time together also strengthens the bonds of trust which is equally important.
What a weird question. It is never about which is more important in a relationship. They both matter and aren't reducible to a comparison based on some sort of quantitative logic (this aspect accounts for 30% of the relationship, so it is less important). A relationship that is supposed to last needs both qualities to be present.
@BeachThunder: Thats also true but you can have shared interests with someone and not go out with them. I mean there's plenty of girls who love MMA, guitar, beer and weight lifting. Doesn't mean we will hit it off straight away, here's the thing though the question itself is flawed because a really good relationship one that you know lasts is one that has both not one or the other. Relationships are far too big to be so simply put into black or white type perception.
Well, everyone would have their own opinion on this, but this comment at least explained why and made a valid point.
Communication. After many failed relationships, this is what I've learned. If you both cannot communicate with each other there is no trust. Without trust there is no love. That is why communication should be more important than trust. You have to be able to express your needs and wants. Your expectations. To get to know each other you have to communicate. You have to talk about yourself to the other person. Nobody is a mind reader. If you don't communicate the other person won't know what you expect. You have to tell them. You also need to express your satisfaction with them. If they don't feel like you are happy with what they do it will make them feel unappreciated. Your relationship would suffer. Basically you can't even start a relationship without communication. Therefore, communication is the foundation but it is also the tools in which you build with.
Log in to comment