I didn't know that it were, so color me surprised.
Or purple. I don't care
why is it A Thing that dudes don't like romance stories?
As for the perception, it's ye olde gender performance. Men need to like X, women need to like Y. We're starting to break them up a bit, we allow women who want to bro out with the boys (the Lad-ette), we're a little less accepting of straight metrosexuals but we're getting there. Someday. Someday when we're robots.
I tried watching the K-On movie a few days ago but couldn't. I've watched both seasons of the show but I couldn't take more than an episode's length of it.
On topic, maybe it's just a lack of exposure to any...good stuff? Most romance I've seen on TV has been really dull and stupid, so I've honestly kind of written off genres like 'romantic comedy' as a whole. I recently watched an episode of this really cliché romance anime about a perfect guy who takes an interest in a shy girl and liked it a lot though, so I don't know.
I'm gonna throw my one cent in here: I like romance stories. I just like good romance stories. Most of these love stories are half-assed attempts at being cutesy. Five Centimeters a Second, Amelie(one of the few good romantic comedies), The love story from Django Unchained was even pretty good. Shitty romantic comedies that are crapped out for every brainless twit, however, I hate with an undying passion.
I don't mind romance stories, as long as they're good romances. I don't understand Hollywood's obsession of forcing a half-assed love story in, say and action film. Is it to be more popular with fans of the romance genre? Because if so, one hot lady character making out with a dude holding a machine gun isn't enough to get those people to watch that film. It's also the only genre (and I do count romance as a genre) that is forced into literally ever other type of film, regardless of tone or theme.
@Animasta: Ok, well, take the above. It's about genre labels. Things that are called romance do not line up with things that have romance. But the people who matter don't have any illusions about whether guys like a little romance. It's evident from the fact that it's in all the media that guys consume.
@Tearhead said:
I'd watch anything as long as it's good. I really liked Love Actually.
Also, anime romance is fucking dumb.
- Love Actually is a pretty good movie and everyone should check it out.
- Anime romance is pretty dumb but that doesn't mean it can't be enjoyed in spite of the dumbness.
I do like a lot of movies with romance in them. "My Sassy Girl" was previously mentioned which I really enjoyed but I suppose that's more romantic comedy that pure romance. What I don't like are the many romance movies aimed directly at women in which the main character is surrounded by multiple unrealistically attractive and sensitive men who are all inexplicably in love with her after a single meeting and seem only to exist to make her happy. It's a complete fantasy for women and doesn't appeal to me. I'm not saying they can't be good movies or that I haven't enjoyed one or two but the vast majority I try to avoid.
I'm gonna use the word "female" a bunch of times in the next paragraph. I apologize for the reductive elements of that kind of writing, but I'm in a mild hurry.
It's self-perpetuating at this point, but it's also due to the fact that most other genres are masculine-centric, which causes us to divid our attentions more. Most sci-fi, action movies, crime dramas, etc. are made by dudes. The same is true of romances, but it's one of few genres with a strong contingent of female creators (the other major outlet for female creators is comedies, though that honestly might be a mostly post-Tina Fey development.) With more female creators, there's more female perspective, which leads to a larger female audience. But, perhaps more importantly, that's one of about three fanbases that ever intends for women to be the primary audience, while dudes divide their attention across pretty much every other genre. There are a ridiculous number of fanbases that are male-centric, meaning it's easy to delve deeply into just about any of them.
It's very similar to our situation in games; a big reason the games industry is so white dude-centric in the American industry is because the majority of American devs are white dudes. It's true of pretty much any kind of content.
@believer258: For the record, my mom thinks Die Hard, Die Harder, and Executive Decision are three of the greatest movies ever made; I'll agree on Die Hard, at least. Even I don't really like The Expendables. Or, well, I only saw Expendables 2, which people seem to say is better, and I really didn't get much out of it.
While I do love things exploding and dudes shooting each other with guns, I like a bunch of movies with romance in them. Amelie is one of my top 10 favourite films ever.
I enjoy movies of every ilk! Punch Drunk Love? Fucking love it! Bridesmaids? Perhaps one of the funniest films I've seen in recent memory! Ironically enough as I've gotten older, I've started to find a lot of action movies to be kinda... boring. But that may be because a lot of the modern picks that I've watched just weren't very good; I hear Judge Dredd (new one) is meant to be really fun, and I can still enjoy a lot of the classics like Predator, Terminator 1&2, Aliens, First Blood (which perhaps does a disservice to classify it solely as an action movie) and so forth. Both of the Expendables films I thought were completely mediocre and forgettable, though, and I certainly don't gravitate towards most new action movie releases as much as I used to.
I like romance stories. I just kind of have high standards for them, sometimes - like, Katherine Heigl movies and Jennifer Aniston movies? Nah. But I dig Love Actually, and, like, The Notebook, and Ruby Sparks was good, and even though it says it's not a rom-com 500 Days of Summer and also Garden State, and Like Crazy. Beginners was fucking excellent, same with Say Anything, and I feel no shame in saying that I thoroughly enjoyed Dirty Dancing. I feel I have a healthy affection for romance stories, but looking over that list they're more of the "indie" variety, or whatever. I can enjoy a good rom-com more than an action movie, sometimes (i'd rather watch say anything than expendables 2), and movies that can successfully mash those things together for me, like True Romance, are fucking tops.
You'll never see me reading one of those romance paperbacks you could find in a zellers, or something, though. Neither the cheap action paperbacks that are right next to them, whatever that says. I guess I don't get the same sense of care from the creator from those sort of books that I do from the ones that I actually like (like, I love A Farewell to Arms and that's pretty much a romance primarily, it's just super sad, but god damn if hemingway didn't put some soul into it. i understand comparing a dime-a-dozen romance story to hemingway is insane but it's the only dominantly romantic book i can think of that i've read).
I guess guys, generally, don't like romance stories because...uh....I can't really think of a reason other than that the stereotypical "it's feminine" thing. I don't get it but yeah.
Maybe most guys (generalizing) are more interested in just the sex than everything else around the sex, the build up, going out, conflicts, etc. while most women (generalizing again) like that stuff more.
Just my guess.
Because it's almost always cookie-cutter garbage. Plus if it's from the female's perspective it's instantly much less relatable to males in the audience. Most romance movies (twilight comes to mind) are designed to place the viewer into the shoes of the very bland, yet relatable female protagonist. So when said female protagonist is being courted by unrealistically attractive male love-interest, the viewer feels like said love-interest is being wooed. Needless to say, I don't want that.
I am a dude and I like romance when it does not suck. If it sucks, I will not like it.
Oh yeah! Did I mention that reading "50 Shades of Grey" was an odd experience for me? Granted, I only flipped through the pages for a bit, but daaaaamn. That shit left me questioning how chicks could find that sort of thing appealing.
What kind of answer are you looking for, exactly? Are you wanting a simple "Why do women like romances? Cause it's an escapist fantasy trip where the woman finds the man of her dreams and lives happily ever after, silly!" answer that you can find in any magazine? Or are you looking for a more profound, psychological explanation of how hormones work and how they affect the desire to develop and nurture a loving family environment?
I love romances because I love my happily ever after stories; I love the characters finding that "special someone" and, presumably, living with them forever and ever, and everything going great and puppies and kittens and rainbows and... you get the idea. Romantic escapism such as movies or books or video games allows me to experience that dream by proxy. Now -why- do I like that sorta stuff? Is it nature? Is it nurture? I think it's a good chunk of both. I can't say I ever experienced social pressure to enjoy romances, it's just something that appealed to me naturally. That said, however, I do think that society and my upbringing have certainly shaped my opinion of what kind of romance appeals to me, personally.
For example, I'm only interested in fairly "traditional" monogamous relationships. Had I been raised in a different society or by different people who, let's ssay were in an 'open' relationship, then perhaps my concept of the ideal romance might be completely different. It's hard to say.
In any event, the only answers you'll really find here are anecdotal. You're gonna need to do some serious reading if you want a real answer ;P
My favorite type of story is a good romance, or romantic drama. That is why I liked Katawa Shoujo so much. I had no interest in the sex although most of it serves it's purpose. Sadly quality romance is hard to come across and I know you don't agree KS falls into that small catagory.
That's a pretty blanket statement to throw out there. Romance is a part of almost every form of media we consume and dudes don't hate it all. If you're talking about the sterotypical chick flick than the reason I don't like them is because almost all of them follow the same bullet point list to write their script. It's the same with action movies but at least I get to see stuff explode.
Romance is in practically in every story in one form or another, and it should be because love is a huge part of life. However, most romantic stories are very predictable and watching the same plot over and over again quickly gets boring. This doesn't just apply to romantic stories, but any other kind of story that follows the same formula all the time. I've gone tired of explosions and shit in my face all the time as well so I can't stand COD games or The Expendables type movies.
@Make_Me_Mad said:
Whatever, I like romance stories. Hell, I grew up watching Soap Operas with my mom while my brothers were at school, that shit was intense. People were getting murdered, divorced, replaced by evil twins and put into comas, and there was always at least one random romance going on in the forefront of all of that. I enjoy romances when they're done well. For an example of a goddamn terrible romance, look towards that Legend of Korra show that came out recently- ugh.
Wow, someone who finally agrees with me that Legend of Korra had HORRIBLE romance.
Thank you.
As for the actual post, I don't mind romance as long as both the male and female are strong characters, meaning they don't NEED each other to function, and are awesome on their own. I absolutely hate it when the two in the romance are clingy, I mean a little bit is alright, but if it goes overboard to the point where if their significant talks to someone of the opposite gender and they get jealous, I don't like that. I also really dislike love triangles, unless if they are done INCREDIBLY well - meaning I like all three characters involved and I don't mind how it turns out.
Just chiming in here as a female who likes Romance stuff. Even though I consider myself to be a pretty big fan of the romance genre, there are also loads of romance things I don't like. Standard western RomComs bore me to death, but I love older romance movies and comedies (the original film version of The Philadelphia Story is one of my favourite movies of all time -- look it up), and I'm a big fan of shoujo manga and otome games. I also probably wouldn't read a Harlequin romance novel unless you paid me to read it ;D
Ah, also, while Die Hard might not be in my top 10, favourite movies ever, but Pulp Fiction, LA Confidential, The Sting, and Wayne's World most definitely are, and I'd say they're pretty "guy friendly." People just like what they like, and variety in fiction makes life fun. Might as well go for a bit of everything, regardless of what gender to which you might identify.
I find them boring and unrealistic most of the time there's always happy endings that's not how life is. I know it's just a movie and not real but the way most movies portray romance reminds me of a hallmark commercial and that makes me sick.
@Video_Game_King said:
@Cathryn said:
People just like what they like
Not entirely. People also like what they're trained to like (or at least react to it). If this wasn't the case, then half the characterization in Persona 4 would make no sense (Kanji, Naoto, etc.).
It's true that there are cultural forces at work when it comes to gender roles and "feminine" and "masculine" likes and dislikes, etc... But, I wouldn't say that Kanji's a great point for argument. He is, afterall, based on one of the most tired, overused character tropes in Japanese YA fiction these days (ie the tough guy who likes cute things). It's been too long since I've played the latter half of the game to comment much on Naoto (though I might have something to say about that in a few days).
That said, the spirit of my earlier comment is that while these types of issues exist, people should be able to enjoy the fiction they want to enjoy, regardless of gender or genre or whatever...
@Cathryn said:
That said, the spirit of my earlier comment is that while these types of issues exist, people should be able to enjoy the fiction they want to enjoy, regardless of gender or genre or whatever...
They should, but the question is if they do. I'd say that there are still forces at work that try to regulate what people partake in. Of course, now I'm wondering if it's possible to like something without being perceived as some type of reaction to a group dynamic, which in turn is leading me to question if there is a concept of self. Philosophy's a bitch.
@ArtisanBreads said:
.. there's romance in just about every movie and game.
We just like there to be more than that.
@Tesla said:
The problem is not many seem to be able to do romance stories well, or in an interesting manner.
It's all cookie cutter, hearts aflutter saccharine cute shit. The story almost always deals with the beginning, "honeymoon" phase of a relationship. My favorite romance stories don't follow those tropes. Like say the movies Blue Valentine and 500 Days of Summer, or the novel Fight Club (which I consider to be a love story between the unnamed narrator and Marla Singer).
both of these hit it on the head.
For me, I just want the romance to play a part in the overarching story not be the whole focus. Take Les Miserables', just saw it in theaters. I normally don't like musicals and love stories. This had both, but it was played so well and contained so much more than that. Now take something like the Notebook. It is almost targeted directly at ladies but it contains enough story outside of the common tropes of romance to rank as an ok movie I'll watch with my girl but isn't something I'd return to.
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