#1 Posted by TekZero (2848 posts) -

Basically, he's addicted to sex so he plays games on his Vita as a way to take his mind off of his urges. (He's in his mid 30's and has a live in girlfriend, just FYI. (I'm sure she's quite sore most of the time))

Anyway, I've been thinking about getting a vita for no apparent reason other than I want a handheld and I don't want a 3DS. My buddy tells me that he loves his (I wonder just how much) and that I should get one. I was looking at the games for it and the PSP compatible games and it seems like I would be satisfied with the games already out for the system.

I'm not going to use the VITA as a substitute for sex. I'm married, so I got used to not having sex anymore a while ago. But aside from that, is there any reason why I shouldn't get a VITA, if I'm comfortable with the amount of games already out?

#2 Edited by Ekami (277 posts) -

They should just have someone read that post and use it as a radio spot.

#3 Posted by A_Cute_Squirtle (772 posts) -

I was hoping this was an announcement for a Vita-Fleshlight attachment.

#4 Posted by Sackmanjones (5189 posts) -

What? Why would you even bring that up? What the fuck does that have to do with you buying a vita?

#5 Edited by JZ (2343 posts) -

Why did you think we needed to know that?

#6 Edited by Demoskinos (16221 posts) -

Hahaha I don't know what the fuck is going on here but I approve.

#7 Edited by FluxWaveZ (19816 posts) -

Uh...

What?

#8 Edited by TekZero (2848 posts) -

@sackmanjones said:

What? Why would you even bring that up? What the fuck does that have to do with you buying a vita?

I didn't want to create another post just like the others threads asking for reasons to get a vita. I already know it could be a substitute for sex, I want other reasons.

#9 Edited by Morningstar (2321 posts) -

This sounds like a commercial :p

#10 Edited by OfficeGamer (1120 posts) -

@tekzero said:

Basically, he's addicted to sex so he plays games on his Vita as a way to take his mind off of his urges. (He's in his mid 30's and has a live in girlfriend, just FYI. (I'm sure she's quite sore most of the time))

@tekzero said:

I'm not going to use the VITA as a substitute for sex. I'm married, so I got used to not having sex anymore a while ago.

My heads hurts now.

#11 Edited by Jams (3043 posts) -

@tekzero said:

@sackmanjones said:

What? Why would you even bring that up? What the fuck does that have to do with you buying a vita?

I didn't want to create another post just like the others threads asking for reasons to get a vita. I already know it could be a substitute for sex, I want other reasons.

He's the next Kaosangel. It's the new, "I was eating at McDonalds when two fat kids were fighting over a twinkie" or whatever he used to start his threads with. Then go on to talk about something that has absolutely nothing to do with the first paragraph.

Online
#12 Edited by Azteck (7416 posts) -

The two things you talk about have absolutely no relation. I'm confused why you'd even bring that up.

#13 Posted by TooWalrus (13325 posts) -

I'm not sure why...

Never mind.

#14 Posted by Beaker (97 posts) -

This is genius!

#15 Edited by OmegaPirate (5642 posts) -

Sony marketing needs to get on this fucking STAT and make it their new Ad campaign. Could single handedly save the vita

#16 Edited by cmblasko (1485 posts) -

SEX

VIDEO GAMES

#17 Posted by Ekami (277 posts) -

Hey guys my friend is a fuck machine with unquenchable thirst for flesh so should I buy a vita?

#18 Edited by I_Stay_Puft (4666 posts) -

This topic header reminds me of Metal Gear Solid 2. Fuck you Raiden!

#19 Edited by Zirilius (841 posts) -

@ekami said:

Hey guys my friend is a fuck machine with unquenchable thirst for flesh so should I buy a vita?

Purple

#20 Posted by cannedstingray (431 posts) -

@azteck: Obviously to get idiots like us to view his thread. The part about about how sore that dude's GF must be came off as pretty creepy to me..

#21 Edited by Ekami (277 posts) -

@azteck: Obviously to get idiots like us to view his thread. The part about about how sore that dude's GF must be came off as pretty creepy to me..

Hey guys my friend has damaged someones vagina so what do you think of this rear touchpad stuff?

#22 Posted by mandude (2670 posts) -

The library of games is usually the only substantial criticism levelled at the Vita, so if that's not a problem for you, I'd go for it.

If you've got PS+, definitely go for it. It's fucking excellent.

#23 Edited by DaMisterChief (612 posts) -

I have learned something today.

#24 Edited by joshthebear (2704 posts) -

#25 Posted by oraknabo (1567 posts) -

Borrow your friend's vita and let him have sex with you to make up for it.

#26 Edited by Jimbo (10181 posts) -

"friend"

#27 Posted by ImmortalSaiyan (4745 posts) -

@azteck said:

The two things you talk about have absolutely no relation. I'm confused why you'd even bring that up.

#28 Posted by awesomeusername (4524 posts) -

@tekzero: Sure, get it. Just remember that memory cards are expensive. If you still get one, buy PS+ for the cloud storage and free games. Plus, there are some good indie titles coming to it like Hotline Miami & Thomas Was Alone. I'm sure there's more to come so the library is slowly picking up.

#29 Edited by Ekami (277 posts) -

Hey guys my bro is forever locked in a psychosexual prison of his own making so whats the deal with this jak and daxter I've heard so much about?

#30 Posted by Ducksworth (670 posts) -

That should be used as a tagline for the GOTY edition* of a Vita game.

*You know, assuming the Vita is alive long enough for that to happen.

#31 Posted by Cloudenvy (5874 posts) -

This is too stilted and not very coherent. Good luck next time!

#32 Edited by Video_Game_King (36566 posts) -
#33 Edited by Weird_Pete (25 posts) -

Sony marketing needs to get on this fucking STAT and make it their new Ad campaign. Could single handedly save the vita

His friend could also single handedly deal with his urges...

#34 Posted by TekZero (2848 posts) -

@ekami said:

Hey guys my friend is a fuck machine with unquenchable thirst for flesh so should I buy a vita?

Lol seriously.

#35 Edited by Oscar__Explosion (2665 posts) -

@ekami said:

Hey guys my friend is a fuck machine with unquenchable thirst for flesh so should I buy a vita?

This is my favorite post of all time.

#36 Edited by Ravenlight (8057 posts) -

Nymphomania is a legitimate condition. Your friend should talk to a doctor about a more long-term solution.

#37 Posted by Bollard (6340 posts) -

@omegapirate said:

Sony marketing needs to get on this fucking STAT and make it their new Ad campaign. Could single handedly save the vita

His friend could also single handedly deal with his urges...

Alright, you win this thread.

#38 Edited by OmegaPirate (5642 posts) -